Review by Psycho Penguin

"Acclaim Idea #1: If you make it, they will come."

I have always liked the Simpsons. From the television shows, to the Arcade video game, to the various merchandise, I have been a big fan of them for several years. However, if there is one thing I really did not like about the whole Simpsons thing, it was the fact that the wonderful people at Acclaim decided to make a trilogy of NES games dedicated to the series. Simply put, I hated two of them. Simpsons: Bart Meets Radioactive Man was one of those two. It is one of the worst NES games ever made, and I hate a ton of NES games, so I am saying a lot when I say that.

The thing I hate most about this game is the fact that it really does nothing to try to get the gamer to enjoy it. There is really nothing to do in this game besides ''kill random enemy, fly to right, collect item, kill more enemies''. Sure, that is pretty much exactly what I wanted to see in this game (and Simpsons: Bart vs the Space Mutants, as well), but I just was not impressed with this game and the type of game play it provided because I JUST DID NOT LIKE IT AND DID NOT FIND IT ENJOYABLE, AT ALL!

I really wish the fine folks over at Acclaim decided to put on their thinking caps a little better before making this game. They probably realized this game sucked, but why they just didn't turn it into ''Magma Pete Saves Bubba Joe!'' or something, I will never know. It probably has something to do with contracts or something. All I have to say is that this is the kind of Simpsons game I wanted to see on the NES, but it was extremely disappointing because it was not fun at all, and it was not a flat out side scrolling beat em up like the Arcade game was.

The story line to the game is fairly interesting. It is not as interesting as the story line found in the other two games of the NES trilogy, but it is definitely better, in my opinion, for the most part. Basically, you are Bartman, and you need to save your comic book hero Radioactive Man from those evil aliens who have decided to play chaos to Bart's young mind once again. This story line is so original and moving that it will often bring you to tears.. of laughter. Yeah, you are Bartman. Just Bart wearing that dollar star costume pretending to have special powers is enough to crack me up!

The graphics in this game could have been a lot better. The character design could have used a little work, as Bart, with his dorky costume, looks like a Halloween costume gone terribly wrong, instead of a super hero, or the classic Bart look (with the blue shorts and orange hat) that we have all come to know and love. But that is the best of the graphics, believe it or not. The enemy designs are horrible, and they animate terribly. Then there are the backgrounds, whcih are just awful. I mean, half of them look completely like static, and are completely degrading to you actually playing the game. Like you would even want to.

The in game scenes that play between stages look pretty good, but that is about it. It is pretty sad when I need to comment on the in game scenes of the game just to find something good to say about the graphics in the game. Everything about this game in terms of graphics is just plain horrible! The character designs, the enemy designs, the backgrounds, even the animation, they all reek of total awfulness! The backgrounds are the worst culprit, and the enemy designs mixed with the awful backgrounds just leads to a graphical letdown. Be preparded to laugh your ass off at these graphics!

The music and sound effects were not as bad as the graphics, but a BB Mak video is better than the graphics were. The music was all right, but it could have been better. I liked how some of the enemies had their own theme music, it sounded all right, and definitely added to the overall variety of music in the game, but where was the classic Simpsons theme I wanted to hear? I was definitely disappointed in that aspect, but I guess the rest of the music was okay. The sound effects in the game were your standard fare, but there was some original stuff that could not be heard in either of the other two Simpsons game in the trilogy. The sound effects could have been a lot better, but at least they were original and somewhat new.

The game controls Bart about as well as a cat controls a paper bag. Needless to say, almost everything in this game was a chore to do, from actually walking around, to jumping, to killing enemies. First off, the game features a cool attack you can do, where you basically fly, jump into an enemy, and kill it, but it takes a lot of practice in order to pull off. Secondly, it felt very weird to be flying around in the game, because Bart would sometimes rise magically, and then suddenly fall quickly. What is up with that? It makes the game seem improperly balanced. Finally, it was sometimes a chore to even do something as basic as jumping, because the game would often cause your jump to screw up. Joy.

The game itself is just not very fun to play at all in terms of basic game play. Your only really special ability in the game is the fact that Bart is now Bart Man, so he now has the ability to fly. How cool is that? I wake up in the morning and I say to myself, ''Man, I hope I can find one game to play today in which I can fly around in a dorky looking costume, pretending to be a super hero, and then I can actually fly! Wow! I would really be a chick magnet!'' Shows you how sad my life. But this game takes the cake. I never really figured a game could be as bad as this one was (save the notable and obvious exceptions, like Heroes of the Lance or Ikari Warriors 2).

But this game takes the cake at being one of the worst I have ever played. Basically, all you really ever do is fly around, avoiding enemies, and eventually dying. I got to the third stage of this game once, then I realized basically there was no point to actually playing this game, so I turned it off and proceeded to do something to this game I never thought I would: I put it back into my box of NES games. Why I did, I will never know, but the game will always haunt me. Anyway, this game is pathetic. All you do is avoid enemies and try to collect items. There is nothing fun about it, at all.

How much do you expect to play a game like this over the long haul? Do you really expect to love playing this game? If your name is not Dingo Jellybean, then I am assuming you would not like this game much, at all. If your name is Dingo Jellybean, Misadventures of Tron Bonne is calling you. To everyone else, this game has no replay value, whatsoever! This game is completely annoying and devoid of any serious replay value. The only reason to even play this game is when you want to be humored by something, and the WWF continuing to push Undertaker is not as funny as it once was. Because there are really only three reasons to even play this game more than once. The first reason is to review it, as I have so humbly done. The second is to see how bad games can be. The third and final reason is to get a good laugh. That's it.

This is one of the most challenging games ever, because it actually is one of those games where I guarantee you will not beat it, because you will not want to play it enough in order to beat it! The game is challenging, because the enemies are so amazingly placed that you can literally fly into them at any time. And when you die, you have to return to the beginning of the stage. It got annoying to do after the second or so time, especially considering how challenging some of the stages can actually be. I really was annoyed by the challenge level, as I found this to be an extremely challenging game.

Overall, I found this to be an extremely boring and tedious platformer that does nothing but add to the disappointment that was the Simpsons trilogy for NES. I guess Acclaim figured that they did not need to work on this game as much as some of their other games (like Total Recall.. boy, the extra time really paid off!), and I can't really blame them. I am sure many fans of the series bought this game, and then they probably did what I did: turn it off and put it back in the collection. There is only one good game of the trilogy, and this is not it. Avoid this one like a ''hot 14 year old horny girl'' on the internet.

Good Points
-The sound effects were pretty original, I guess.
-The story line was pretty stupid, yet interesting nevertheless.
-The cheese factor of this game can double the sales of Velveeta, making Kraft the richest company in America.

Not So Good Points
-The graphics are extremely crummy.
-I hated the music in the game.
-The control was extremely horrible.
-Bart looked like a total reekozoid in his cheap dollar store costume.
-The replay value and challenge both were not good.
-Prove me wrong </Chris Benoit>

I Run Down the Ratings.. DaLadiesMan Style!
Story Line - 7.8/10
Graphics - 1.3/10
Music - 1.2/10
Sound Effects - 3.3/10
Control - 1.2/10
Game Play - 1.1/10
Replay Value - Below Average (Ric Flair)
Challenge - Above Average (Mike Sanders)
Is this game worth a purchase? - Nope.
Overall - 1.2/10

The Last Line
I don't care if Viscera interrupted your dream and told you to buy this game or he'd sit on you until you died. I don't care what Dingo Jellybean says in his review. I don't care if you are a Simpsons fanboy and want to collect every game ever made in the series. DO NOT GET THIS GAME!! Do you understand me? I HATED THIS GAME!! This was one of the worst games ever. Playing it is like playing nuclear war with Sudaam Hussein. It may seem like a good idea, but it turns out to case many deaths.

And that is a Ladies Man guarantee!


Reviewer's Score: 1/10 | Originally Posted: 01/06/01, Updated 07/16/01


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