Review by Psycho Penguin

"Colorful, charismatic, classic, and one of my all time favorite games!"

Special Thanks to Runinruder and classicgaming.com for figuring out the name of this game for me so I can review it :)

A few years back, I played a few video games at my local Toys R' Us. The games that I mainly played were Vectorman, Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island, and a certain Turbografx game. I remember I had a lot of fun playing it, and it certainly was one of my all time favorites. I used to play that game for an hour every day, I used to walk over to Toys R' Us just to play it. It really was an addicting game that I absolutely loved. The only problem was, I never really found the name of the game out ^_^.

A sad day occured later that year. My Toys R' Us closed down. I ended up moving a short time later, and never found out the name of this game until recently, when I was chatting with my fellow GameFAQs loser err user, Runinruder. I described the game to him, and he told me that the game I was looking for might have been Air Zonk. After a day or two of research (basically stealing some pics off of classicgaming.com), I realized that this was indeed the game. I had found the game I was looking for!

A short time later, I finally got one of my top wishes, a Turbografx system. My cousin gave me a choice of two games to choose from that he owned. As you may expect, I asked for Air Zonk, but sadly he did not have it. So, I chose the other two games I wanted (Bonk's Adventure and Blazing Lazers) and played them, sadly, because I wanted Air Zonk! Well, guess what, yesterday, I went to a pawn shop, and lo and behold Air Zonk was there for 4 bucks! So I bought it, and my life is now complete!

My road to happiness story is now complete. Please stay tuned for the actual review.
The moral to the story is Steve is an Air Zonk addict whose life is now complete.

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The Actual Review (Rejoice and Be glad!)
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Today's show takes place at Lake Worth High's cafeteria.

---------- GRAPHICS!!!!----------

Yipee, folks, today I get to talk about the graphics of a 16 bit game!!! How else can I describe the graphics in the game by saying that they are simply amazing? Yes, the graphics in this game are some of the best I have ever seen in a 16 bit game. I know I might happen to say that a lot, but this time I actually mean it.

*crowd gasps.*

Yes, I know it is quite a shock. This is simply one of the best looking shooters I have seen. The graphics are vibrant, colorful, and look absolutely amazing. The character design in the game is rather unique. As some of you may know, there was a popular series for the Turbografx, as one of the first games released was a game called Bonk's Adventure. Picture Bonk with a space suit and a lightning bolt across his head, and you have Zonk, his weird, spacy nephew (I think.)

Yes, this game is simply too sweet.

The coolest part of the graphics in the game are the amazing backgrounds in the game. Each of the stages feature a vibrant and well animated background that looks great, and the variety of backgrounds in the game are simply awesome. I really liked the graphics in the game, and they really showed off the true power of the Turbografx 16 as a video game console. And that's the bottom line, because Stone Cold Steve McFadden said so!

It's the Stone Cold stunner! Here's a Steveweiser, Air Zonk!

Graphics Score: 9.3/10.
Reason: Because I feel like it.

---------- MUSIC AND SOUND EFFECTS!!!!----------

Thou shault bow down to the power of the Turbografx.

If there is one game that screamed that phrase when the Turbografx came out, Air Zonk was it. The music and sound effects in the game were awesome. I would talk about the sound effects right now, but quite frankly I do not want to because I have a headahe from the constant ringing of my sister's NSync CD.

Would you like an Advil, Mr. McFadden?

No, I will be just fine, vile servant. I might as well discuss the music since the NSync CD has been disposed of properly. Thank you, vile servant, by the way.

No problem, sir.

Anyways, the music in this game was awesome, some of the best I have yet to hear on the Turbografx console. The music was awesome and well varied. At first, it may sound a little annoying, but that is because the whole game is trying to be annoying to little brat kids who only listen to garbage like Backstreet Boys. But once you learn to appreciate the music, you will discover that the music in the game is quite good. I especially like how the music gets all hectic when in a tough situation, it really fits in well with the feel of the game.

Now can you discuss sound effects, sir, or is your headache still impairing you?

I think I can talk about the sound effects now, thank you vile servant. The sound effects in the game were simply awesome. Just listen to the sounds of the guns! The guns dammit! These are some of the coolest sounding guns ever! Hell, the whole game looks cool! This is an awesome game!! Sound effects rule! *Beavis and Butthead grunts*

Here comes the trainer to tranquilize Mr McFadden.

I'll be OK, vile trainer. Anyways, this is the end of the music and sound effect section, jabroni, if you smell what the Crock is cooking!

It's the Crock Bottom! He's got the wrist band off, its time for the most elecrtrfying move, eh no it's not.

Music Score: 9.3/10.
Reason: Because I feel like it.

Sound Effects Score: 9.4/10.
Reason: Because I feel like it.

---------- GAMEPLAY AND CONTROL!!!!----------

McFadden takes a bow after the thrilling Crock Bottom special.

Thank you, thank you. Now I will discuss the thrilling gameplay and not so thrilling control of the game. Believe it or not, audience, there is a flaw in this incredible game.

*crowd gasps*

Yes, I know it is hard to believe that there is a problem with this game, but there is. The control in the game is convoulted. I don't mean simply convoulted, I mean plain old messed up! This has got to be the worst control for a shooting game ever! I mean, your guy moves along at such insane speeds and zig zags everywhere that it is hard to keep up with him! After a while, the control gets out of hand.

Trainer: Will you go out insane again by thinking about the control?

Good point, let me talk about the gameplay now. This is your average side scrolling shooter, but it has some advantages. The game is quite short (5 levels) but the stage design is wonderful, as I have seen a lot of different types of enemies, from traffic lights to whales. This has got to be the coolest shooter ever, and is one of my all time favorites. The coolest addition is the smiley faces, without a doubt. With these smilies, you can get new powers! This game rocks! And that is my final answer, because I am The Game and I am that damn good!

Alpoagree on the trainer through the flaming table!

Gameplay Score: 9.8/10
Reason: Because I feel like it.

Control Score: 3.1/10
Reason: Because I feel like it.

---------- REPLAY VALUE, CHALLENGE, AND ALL THAT OTHER GOOD STUFF!!!!----------

McFadden takes a bow after the thrilling Alpoagree special.

Thank you, thank you. For my next trick, I will merely dicuss the replay value in the game first. The game offers solid replay value, nothing spectacular. The big problem with the replay value in the game is the fact that the game is so short. Yes, with only five stages featured, the game will quickly become tedious for you probably. But just look at it in my shoes. I started playing this game five years ago at a Toys R' Us, and it is the pride and joy of my video game collection today. Does that tell you something?

Audience Member: Yeah, you're a freak!

As security removes the rather charismatic member of my lovely audience, I will discuss the challenge level of the game. This is far from the most challenging game of all time, thats for sure. Most of the shooter games I play are challenging, but not this one. First off, it is split into three challenge levels.

Bitter Mode: As you may expect, this is the most challenging mode.

Sour Mode: A decent challenge, nothing too special.

Sweet Mode: The game is very easy on this mode, we will just leave it at that.

Challenge Score: Below Average
Reason: Because I feel like it.

Replay Value Score: Above Average
Reason: Because I feel like it.

---------- OVERALL!!!!----------

This is my favorite Turbografx game ever, and is well worth a purchase, despite the shoddy control.

Overall Score: 9.8/10
Reason: Because I love it!! (What else did you think I was going to say?)


Reviewer's Score: 10/10 | Originally Posted: 08/07/00, Updated 07/16/01


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