Why the hell do I get inheritance letters from the courier so damn much?

#1ScarfacepsychoPosted 2/13/2013 6:07:30 AM
It is ******* annoying.
#2MC2011Posted 2/13/2013 6:10:10 AM(edited)
Medieval-Fantasy scams.

They want to steal your personal information so they can mantle you and steal your geepees.
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T8e w*!m+% i, wh[>e 1)v=d [o6r %8fe.
The woman in white saved your life.
#3Alyzabeth1990Posted 2/13/2013 6:38:58 AM
Because everyone is either dead or dying
#4Jstretch19Posted 2/13/2013 8:50:09 AM
Because being a courier is dangerous work, look at what happened in New Vegas.
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Screw GS
#5Epic_McDudePosted 2/13/2013 8:55:05 AM
From: Jstretch19 | #004
Because being a courier is dangerous work, look at what happened in New Vegas.


This right here. See?

(That game was damn good, by the way. Or at least I think so.)
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"Fight for them, then, and die for their sins!" -Dracula, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
#6JohnRyan1228Posted 2/13/2013 9:09:23 AM
Epic_McDude posted...
From: Jstretch19 | #004
Because being a courier is dangerous work, look at what happened in New Vegas.


This right here. See?

(That game was damn good, by the way. Or at least I think so.)


Don't question yourself. It is an awesome game.
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If I ever cared about what you had to say, I'd stick a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger with my toes.
#7LinkLuigiPosted 2/13/2013 10:01:30 AM
Epic_McDude posted...
From: Jstretch19 | #004
Because being a courier is dangerous work, look at what happened in New Vegas.


This right here. See?

(That game was damn good, by the way. Or at least I think so.)


Too glitchy, haven't finished it. What I have played? I loved.
#8Epic_McDudePosted 2/13/2013 10:13:33 AM(edited)
From: JohnRyan1228 | #006
Don't question yourself. It is an awesome game.


I don't, I believe it. There's a fair bit of people that don't agree, though.

This topic makes me want to do a Courier playthrough in Skyrim. As an Imperial, perhaps.


*WARNING! WARNING! SPOILERS! DANGER, DANGER WILL ROBINSON!*


*Dramatic Music*

*Movie Announcer Guy (Don LaFontaine) Voice* "Before The Courier, there was... DRAGONBORN COURIER!

In a world of chaos... He had one chance. One life to live. *Slow-motion scene plays of Dragonborn Courier running from the Imperials and Thalmor with a scroll in hand and mail/scrollbag at his side, close to being captured, heartbeat audio playing throughout*

They were going to execute him. ("NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" scream) *Scene plays of the Dragonborn Courier about to be executed while yell-mouthing the word "NOOOOOOOOOO!", orchestral music swelling all the while*

But from his soul... *Scene plays of Alduin smash-landing onto the top of the tower and interrupting the execution with sinister music playing in background, heartbeat audio* Came the call of the Dragonborn.

*Scene plays of Dragonborn Courier escaping, triumphant music playing* Now, he returns into the world- Destined to deliver Mail and stop the Dragon threat! *Scene plays of the Dragonborn Courier in battle-ready pose, wind-whooshing audio*

Along the way, he will meet a man... *Scene plays of a BBM (Big Burly Man) running towards the Dragonborn Courier* *Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice* GET DOWN! *Scene plays of BBM jumping sideways in the air and taking an arrow in the knee in the process* *Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice* GET DOWN AGAIN! *Scene plays of BBM shaking the Dragonborn Courier violently before being Fus Ro Dah'd off of a cliff* *Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice* DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?! THEY ARE TRYING TO TAKE MY SWEET ROLLS!

*Movie Announcer Guy Voice again* Bang some wenches... *Scene plays of Dragonborn Courier partying with assorted naked women of varying races in nothing but a loincloth, Iron Helmet and holding a bottle of the finest Nord Mead in one hand with a wench in the other while upbeat fantasy techno plays*

Train Hard... *Scenes play of the Dragonborn Courier accepting quests, chopping wood, stealing chickens, working at the lumber mill, getting drunk and doing Fus Ro Dah 'Air Push-Ups'*

He killed stumpy... *Movie Announcer Guy Don LaFontaine weeps* *Scene plays of the Dragonborn Courier killing Stumpy the Dog in Riverwood*

He delivered mail... *Scene plays of Dragonborn Courier extending a scroll towards an unknown person's hand in a black, dark and smoky background*

And now he has arrived to deliver the final package... *Epic scene plays of Dragonborn Courier facing down Alduin and then pulling his middle finger out of his scroll/mailbag, INSPIRING music plays*

DRAGONBORN COURIER! ONE WAY IN, NO WAY OUT! COMING SOON..."


*SPOILER AVERTED!*
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"Fight for them, then, and die for their sins!" -Dracula, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
#9The_Last_DudePosted 2/13/2013 10:20:42 AM
Yo what's up with the black bars? And TC stop killing npcs and letting dragons kill them.
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I am the last Dude...
#10bebob26Posted 2/13/2013 10:23:07 AM
^Lmao...dude you just made my day with the Pablo Fransisco joke.
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"I'd rather do black tar heroin with Alanis Morrisette than watch a quarter of Canadian Football" - Colin Cowherd