Yeah, that's not even close to reality (a hard number like 500 points of damage is so stat and circumstance dependent that I can't imagine you have any justification for suggesting it). Have fun with your counterattacks, though.
If there were attacks like Gil Toss or Self-Destruct in the game, the first part might have some merit. The second is disingenuous at best--giving Chelicerata Wound is already against the FAQ's recommendations.
Even under "which SAB should spam Wound?" Black Chocobo is faster. Jihl has action economy shenanigans.
Snow clearly laughs at Metalligantaur. That does not mean you should use him over Goblin Chieftain.