Buy it, Rent it, or F*** it: The Walking Dead Survival Instinct

#1horror_spookyPosted 3/21/2013 10:39:01 AM
+Norman Reedus and Harper from Black Ops II reprise their roles from the show
+Zombies are done right in that they can only be effectively killed via headshot
+Zombies are also done right because they are deadly in groups but weak alone
+Variety in what the zombies look like
+Survival elements are all very good ideas, such as managing supplies, people, and vehicles
+Every weapon feels different
+Using the crossbow is immensely satisfying
+Old school survival horror elements such as a severe lack of ammunition
+Nicely implemented jump scares
+Lots of zombies on screen at once
+B movie charm that may appeal to some people looking for a bad time
+Hilariously, the choices in this game actually have a bigger effect on the gameplay and story than the choices in Telltale's The Walking Dead adventure game series!
-Lots of repeating dialogue
-Lacks the emotional qualities the franchise is known for
-Story is thin as paper and has virtually no bearing on the show or anything else
-Ugly, ugly, ugly game
-Car is guaranteed to run out of fuel no matter what you do
-Sending survivors out to scavenge is a giant waste of time
-Zombies tend to get stuck on invisible walls
-I witnessed an entire roadside, plus all the vehicles on the road, disappear - and got it on video!
-Some truly awful level design
-Repeating textures and environments makes many areas feel exactly the same
-Distraction items simply do not work
-"Zombie grapple" QTE happens way too much and makes the zombies less of a threat
-Tutorial level is the best level in the game
-Doesn't tell you where you've already got collectibles, so completionists will have to play through the game multiple times and go by trial and error to figure out what level they're missing the damn squirrel statue or whatever
-Terrible platforming is terrible
-Bad sound effects
-All the good core survival ideas are poorly executed
-Had weapons and items magically disappear for seemingly no reason
-Too many roadside side-attractions that are just a cheap way to lengthen the already super short game
-Could've seriously used new game plus
-Graphical glitches I didn't even know existed
-Daryl's sweating when sprinting is gross
-Bad checkpoint system
-Imagine a poor man's ZombiU. Then imagine a step down from that
-No mission select
?Daryl's grunting when pushing objects is both hilarious and annoying

Verdict:

F*** it

And in case you haven't heard, these are now all are on a blog. I changed the verdict of a couple of 2012 games to better match with my stricter style of scoring these, so if you're interested in what I changed, check out the blog:

http://buyrentf.blogspot.com/

[Previous Entries]

2013
Anarchy Reigns - F*** it
DmC: Devil May Cry - Buy it
Black Ops II: Revolution - Rent it
Dead Space 3 - Rent it
Aliens: Colonial Marines - F*** it
Crysis 3 - Rent it
Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance - Rent it
God of War: Ascension - Rent it
Naruto Shippuden: Ultimate Ninja Storm 3 - F*** it

Archives - 2013
Call of Duty Classic - Buy it
Closure - F*** it
Spyro the Dragon - Buy it

2012
http://buyrentf.blogspot.com/search/label/Games%20-%202012
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Just when they think they have all the answers, I change the questions.
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#2Reece504Posted 3/21/2013 10:42:46 AM
You forgot that soon as you kill a zombie they disappear right in front of you faster than bodies disappear in a N64 game lol
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#3MNeighborTotoriPosted 3/21/2013 10:43:33 AM
no one care. be quiet.
#4bond465Posted 3/21/2013 10:55:30 AM
you realize you can go on youtube in 10 seconds and watch actual gameplay and make a decision of your own.
#5horror_spooky(Topic Creator)Posted 3/21/2013 11:00:10 AM
bond465 posted...
you realize you can go on youtube in 10 seconds and watch actual gameplay and make a decision of your own.


What is your point? That because of YouTube, we should just stop looking for the opinions of others and discussing and analyzing video games?
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Just when they think they have all the answers, I change the questions.
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#6SSJ4CHRISPosted 3/21/2013 11:19:37 AM
MNeighborTotori posted...
no one care. be quiet.


You wasted seconds from all of our lives with that stupid post. If you didn't care, you wouldn't have posted at all. Learn logic before you post, please.
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#7bond465Posted 3/21/2013 11:22:00 AM
horror_spooky posted...
bond465 posted...
you realize you can go on youtube in 10 seconds and watch actual gameplay and make a decision of your own.


What is your point? That because of YouTube, we should just stop looking for the opinions of others and discussing and analyzing video games?


those opinions are usually included in the youtube videos
#8HaloOfTheSun442Posted 3/21/2013 12:00:45 PM
horror_spooky posted...
bond465 posted...
you realize you can go on youtube in 10 seconds and watch actual gameplay and make a decision of your own.


What is your point? That because of YouTube, we should just stop looking for the opinions of others and discussing and analyzing video games?


No, you should just stop looking for the opinions of others and make your own.
#9Petey_MeanisPosted 3/21/2013 12:03:47 PM
From: horror_spooky | Posted: 3/21/2013 1:39:01 PM | #001
Verdict:

F*** it

Why would I want to have sex with this game?
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#10jackorhoadsPosted 3/21/2013 12:07:06 PM
I'll buy it when it becomes super cheap.
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