Samurott gave me Torrent... which I'm afraid wouldn't have much in the way of practical uses in my daily life, unfortunately. But if I ever somehow learn to manipulate water with my mind and am in mortal danger, ohh boy...
Twilight Sparkle is best pony. 3DS Friend Code: 2234-7169-9510
I take that to mean that if I so much as touch someone else, they either become poisoned, paralyzed or they fall instantly asleep. Whatever the case, it'll be an unpleasant (and potentially fatal, depending on where we are at the time) situation for anyone I come across.
.....Welp. There goes my social life.
Seriously though, if these "pokemon abilities" could be obtained in real life, I don't think I'd ever want an ability that would cause physical harm to others. Honestly, I doubt very many people would go around causing harm to others for no reason, despite their positive reaction to getting an offensive ability.