Hey guys, mind checking out my review?

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3 years ago#1
I've recently decided to go to school for Journalism to pursue a career in gaming journalism. For practice I've been trying to write some reviews on games that I purchase and I recently did a review for this game. I would greatly appreciate if you guys checked it out and shared your thoughts and opinions on it. Criticism is also welcome since I am definitely looking forward to getting better at this. Thanks guys.

Here's the link - http://www.gamespot.com/users/abnergoinbig/show_blog_entry.php?topic_id=m-100-25999927
3 years ago#2
I approve. (*is a journalism major*)
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PSN Salesrobmy7 | I play: MvC2 and PSASBR || Add me!
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3 years ago#3
You never start a sentence with and.

Not trying to be rude but if you want to be a journalist, you need to know that sort of stuff.

Also you have misspelled a few names and such and got some information incorrect (level 3's do not guarantee 3 kills.

Also the overall structure seems a tad all over the place and you explain some of your points in a long winded way, but overall it was a fair review.
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PSASBR: Big Daddy, Raiden
PSN: Omnisignificance
3 years ago#4
tl;dr

but i agree with 8/10
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3 years ago#5
Kindertotenwald posted...
You never start a sentence with and.

Not trying to be rude but if you want to be a journalist, you need to know that sort of stuff.

Also you have misspelled a few names and such and got some information incorrect (level 3's do not guarantee 3 kills.

Also the overall structure seems a tad all over the place and you explain some of your points in a long winded way, but overall it was a fair review.

You can start sentences with "And". They tell you not to in school, but they in literature you'll see them do it all the time. Actually, yeah, he's taking a class or something. They might not want him to. Just saying though.
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Robbit (Jumping Flash!) definitely most wanted AND deserving for PS All-Stars Battle Royale!!!
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3 years ago#6
Kindertotenwald posted...
You never start a sentence with and.

Not trying to be rude but if you want to be a journalist, you need to know that sort of stuff.

Also you have misspelled a few names and such and got some information incorrect (level 3's do not guarantee 3 kills.

Also the overall structure seems a tad all over the place and you explain some of your points in a long winded way, but overall it was a fair review.


I see what you're talking about. I really appreciate it and will definitely remember this for my next review.
3 years ago#7
TheNardDog posted...
Kindertotenwald posted...
You never start a sentence with and.

Not trying to be rude but if you want to be a journalist, you need to know that sort of stuff.

Also you have misspelled a few names and such and got some information incorrect (level 3's do not guarantee 3 kills.

Also the overall structure seems a tad all over the place and you explain some of your points in a long winded way, but overall it was a fair review.

You can start sentences with "And". They tell you not to in school, but they in literature you'll see them do it all the time. Actually, yeah, he's taking a class or something. They might not want him to. Just saying though.


In books the only time I see a sentence start with and is when a character is actually talking.
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PSASBR: Big Daddy, Raiden
PSN: Omnisignificance
3 years ago#8
I like it.

Though... why do you spell it Pa Rappa. Isn't it Parappa?
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3 years ago#9
*Is a Journalism major*


You can start sentences with "and." However, he is correct that they will teach you not to. It's also important to keep in mind that AP Style (standard newspaper format for journalists) has a great number of rules and conventions that are atypical outside of a newspaper.

If you know the rules, you can sometimes break them (but you run the risk of being called out). Kinder's other points are good ones too.

You missed a fact here and there, but the article is overall a good read, and fair. I didn't know what level of detail you were looking in a critique. But good stuff, IMO.
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PSN Salesrobmy7 | I play: MvC2 and PSASBR || Add me!
Favorites SMB3 | FFT | FFX | MvC2 | Pokemon
3 years ago#10
Kindertotenwald posted...
You never start a sentence with and.

Not trying to be rude but if you want to be a journalist, you need to know that sort of stuff.

Also you have misspelled a few names and such and got some information incorrect (level 3's do not guarantee 3 kills.

Also the overall structure seems a tad all over the place and you explain some of your points in a long winded way, but overall it was a fair review.


I used to think the same way about starting sentences with "And". It was the way we were all taught in grade school I guess.

Truth is you can start a sentence with "And" if it continues from the previous sentences information. At least, that's what I've been told. *shrugs*
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PSN: kaserex
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