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Why is Gabe Newell fat?

#41minjonator1234Posted 9/21/2013 12:34:48 AM
BendoHendo posted...
I wish I was created in Gaben's image instead of God's.

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Team Fortress 2, the only thing that has an economy worse than America's
''Wake me up when the Wii U causes cancer in 99% of people who drink it'' -Spillard
#42Solid---SteakPosted 9/21/2013 1:37:33 AM
Because he's a PC gamer, obviously.
#43SpazH3dPosted 9/21/2013 2:46:29 AM
Fattie Gaben is the prettiest Gaben. All hail the fat!

PS: I'm skinny.
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#44KeyeszxPosted 9/21/2013 3:32:07 AM
The same reason royalty in the medieval times were fat. They don't have to do **** when they run the 'world'
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#45Fade2black001Posted 9/21/2013 4:48:57 AM
R i c k posted...
Gabe gets fat every time someone delays Half Life 3...

Wait...


You need so much help its not even funny.
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We just keep doing the wrong thing until it turns out right.
#46PhilOnDezPosted 9/21/2013 5:47:51 AM
Serious answer: because he was fat at any point and losing weight is nearly impossible. The people who are able to lose weight and keep it off are medical anomalies and absolutely not the norm. Long-term weight loss of more than 5% of your total body weight has a failure rate of 99.8% and that doesn't take into account people who were unable to lose weight in the first place, and the plan that helps you lose 5% involves counting every calorie and exercising every day.

5% just isn't a lot of weight, if you weighed 300 you'd be able to get down to 285 and that's about it, lose much more and your hormones are going to shift to the point where you'll end up back at 300 even if you keep on with the 285 diet and if you go back to eating how you ate at 300 you'll gain even more.

As for how your body changes when you lose weight, in addition to the hormone changes that will basically rewire your brain into a food hunting machine that rewards the pleasure center nearly as much for eating as it does for sex, your body's muscles become insanely efficient. That sounds like it would be a good thing right? Well, not if you're trying to lose weight. The muscles of a previously overweight person can burn up to 60% less calories than those of a person who is at their natural highest weight. That means for every 25 minutes of exercise a normal person would need to maintain their weight a previously fat person would need an hour.

TL:DR Losing weight is hard and 'Weight Loss' lobbyists work to block drugs that could actually help because fad diets and $50 bottles of caffeine pills are a multibillion dollar industry.
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#47YuniuninuniunPosted 9/21/2013 6:27:23 AM
Gaben doesn't trust banks, so he eats the money to keep it safe
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#48HydroCannabinolPosted 9/21/2013 7:30:44 AM
DerPancake posted...
TheC0ndemnedOne posted...

You used a picture of your friend as your profile image?

But then again I use a picture of a dog dressed up like a human, so I don't have much room to talk (or bark).


Don't worry she doesn't mind.


Your friend is pretty damn cute
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I thought I chose very easy, not brand new to the game. - CheesyPhil
#49AlexTheNextOnePosted 9/21/2013 7:58:02 AM
Digital Storm posted...
Loshadt posted...
BendoHendo posted...
Every time someone calls Gaben fat, Half-Life 3 gets delayed 3 months. Keep it up infidels.


It'll be worth the weight.


All that effort gone to waist.


Ah, the internet.
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Read everything, listen to everybody, believe nothing, until you can prove it through your own research. For that is the true mark of intelligence.
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#50xKynOxPosted 9/21/2013 8:03:23 AM
Maybe he likes eating food?