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What are the worst "professional" reviews you've read, regarding a video game?

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2 years ago#1
Simple topic. What were the worst reviews you've ever seen or read regarding a video game. Could come from IGN/Gamespot, etc.

EX: I know a lot of people tend to bring up God Hand when it comes to discrediting IGN reviews
http://www.ign.com/articles/2006/10/10/god-hand-review?page=2
2 years ago#2
I have read many but GameInformers review of MGR is laughable.. They claim there isnt a dodge of any kind. they also claim the blocking mechanic is cumbersome.. he also keeps bringing up Bayonetta ( a masterpiece ) but its extremely unprofessional.. especially making fabricated lies

lol fail
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"Ignorance is venomous, and it murders the soul
Spreading like a virus running rampant, but out of control" Immortal Technique
2 years ago#3
The only ones that really bothered me, beyond any kind of difference in personal opinion, was that one Borderlands 2 review where the reviewer had no knowledge of video games and that crazy Aliens: Colonial Marines review that gave it like a 90 something and read like an ad.

For reference:
Aliens review - http://www.egmnow.com/articles/reviews/egm-review-aliens-colonial-marines/
Borderlands 2 review - http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2012/09/18/game-theory-borderlands-2-fails-to-cross-ove/
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Playing right now - Hotline Miami
2 years ago#4
boring_name posted...
The only ones that really bothered me, beyond any kind of difference in personal opinion, was that one Borderlands 2 review where the reviewer had no knowledge of video games and that crazy Aliens: Colonial Marines review that gave it like a 90 something and read like an ad.


Who was the reviewer?
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PSN: Snippuh
2 years ago#5
Varron posted...
boring_name posted...
The only ones that really bothered me, beyond any kind of difference in personal opinion, was that one Borderlands 2 review where the reviewer had no knowledge of video games and that crazy Aliens: Colonial Marines review that gave it like a 90 something and read like an ad.


Who was the reviewer?


Just edited the post to include the reviews, they're a good laugh in a way. One says Borderlands should have been $30 and compares it to a NASCAR game.
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Playing right now - Hotline Miami
2 years ago#6
more from GI

"You canít just hold a direction while performing regular attacks and expect to block; each one requires the stick to be moved from a neutral position. With practice, you can master this clunky mechanic"

sounds like a casual who cant even master a simple mechanic that takes less then 10 minutes to figure out and get it to work 100% every time.
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"Ignorance is venomous, and it murders the soul
Spreading like a virus running rampant, but out of control" Immortal Technique
2 years ago#7
http://www.gamespot.com/star-wars-battlefront-2004/reviews/star-wars-battlefront-review-6108209/

The dude who did the battlefront reviews for Gamestop, talk about reading from a script...
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Greatness From Small Beginnings
2 years ago#8
i remember years ago game informer reviewed paper mario on the gamecube. they said it was a good game etc, but then gaveit a low score because the game was kiddy. they later responded that they didnt think people would like the game cause of it
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scientists had till Dec 31 2009 to get off their asses and create megaman. they failed us.
2 years ago#9
Anything by Gamespot's Carolyn Petit. S/he constantly contradicts herself -
"It's a great retro game..."
"...but the poor quality graphics..."

"It's a fun game aimed at little kids..."
"...unfortunately it wasn't very challenging"

It'd be funny if it wasn't so profoundly ignorant.
2 years ago#10
Dirk_McHardpeck posted...
Anything by Gamespot's Carolyn Petit. S/he constantly contradicts herself -
"It's a great retro game..."
"...but the poor quality graphics..."

"It's a fun game aimed at little kids..."
"...unfortunately it wasn't very challenging"

It'd be funny if it wasn't so profoundly ignorant.


Carolyn is a o.k reviewer.
It's fault is being too fair for some games, thus the contradictions.

Worst review I would have to say was OXM review of Dragon's Dogma.

The guy flat out said he couldn't pass the tutorial section where the guard wants you to attack dummies with either magic or physical attacks & then goes on to bash the game from the 30 minutes he played.
It was pathetic.
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"gone are the days of creativity, and playing japanese games because you secretly wish you were japanese" -CinisterX
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