All of this just because my name is Conan on Conduit >.<.
No, All of this just because I watched an episode of Conan O'Brien's new TV Show, coincidentally called "Conan", right before I got on GameFAQs to look at a topic calling out Conan. Basically, I was bored, so I made a joke out of it. You can get from the OP that it obviously isn't calling out Conan O'Brien, but I joked about it anyway.
Oh, and because your name is Conan on Conduit.
Hell, there are no rules here - we're trying to accomplish something. -Thomas A. Edison