King of the Monsters 2: The Next Thing

"King of Monstruosity"

King of Monsters couldn't indeed have a better name. Because this game is really the king of monstruous games. You control a monster out of 3 available ones and have to walk in towns, villages and other idiotic settings destroying everything you see before you tackle on an enemy which seems to come directly from hell.

You would think that this makes the game quite fun since it has a pretty enjoyable principle. But why do you think ? Didn't you know it isn't good to think ?! This game is nothing close to fun simply because everything from the picture on the cartridge to the character selection screen is as dumb as that thing which currently enables to sit on a chair.

Let me talk about the graphics first. Or should I say the absence of graphics ? Basically, KM consists of various colors that have been place all around your screen at random to give it a weird and eye-damaging appearance. It could at least have been good with well-drawn characters but no ! The characters (can I use the word or is that too much of a qualification ?) look like a pile of you-know-what and are dull.

Moreover, the backgrounds are as devoid of details as much as Britney Spears is talented. Things are so bad that you'll actually cherish utter garbage after playing this game…If you manage to spend more than 5 minutes on it, of course.

The music…But wait, there is no music in this game. Or, at least, whatever music that has been dropped in has been prepared according to Alien's taste. Believe me, it would have been better to completely forget about the music - at least, my ears wouldn't hurt so much now. The sound effects are as good as my little sister farting and I won't even dare going into further details.

I'm too disgusted to even think about the control but it will not be said that Signor Ayolos omitted to point out the major flaw in a game. You only use 2 buttons in the game, one of which is to punch or kick your opponent and the other is to jump. But the buttons don't work !!!

Sit around tapping the buttons all day and you'll have at most, delivered ten blows and jumped seven times. And this is made even worse by the fact that the game is harder than a rock that has been coated with magnesium oxide. Even if you get close to the opponent and hammer on the button, there's a 2000% probability that he will grab ou first and wohoo…his single attack will deplete half your lifebar.

KM shines in only one point here : it'll suck your money and it isn't even worth it. The gameplay is casually absent and if you manage to play it for more than 5 minutes, hats off to you, my friend ! I still cannot believe how such a game could have been created and guess what…It's even on the Neo-Geo requested FAQs list. Some people have no taste !

Reviewer's Score: 1/10, Originally Posted: 01/02/02, Updated 11/09/02