"Interesting, yet unrealistic."

Well, this is certainly something different.

Mocap Boxing, a game that you'll most likely see in an arcade near you (if you're lucky), makes valiant attempts and great strides to take the Boxing Sim to a new level. But how exactly does it strive to accomplish this monumental feat? No, it doesn't upgrade the graphics to the “next-gen” level of games... no, it doesn't implement any new-fangled and improved control scheme that's 10 times better than all of the current boxing games out there... Mocap Boxing simply forces you to get up off of your big, fat butt and BOX! A first for just about any boxing game, it actually RECORDS YOUR MOTION- hence the name, Mocap (please tell me you were able to figure that out by yourself... please). Though many people (including myself) might be turned off by this actual requirement for physical movement, I'll tell you that it's entirely possible to have a blast with this game, regardless of your current condition. So you fat armchair boxers and old amateur has-beens can have fun too... lazy slobs. However, you may be disappointed by some of the UN-realism...

The game looks great, typical of most arcade games. The boxers you face are all interesting and lively people, and some of them will literally strike fear into your hearts. Or maybe that's just me. The boxing venues (or should I say venue, as in singular?) are also very intricate and well designed, although you most likely won't be paying more attention to them than you are paying attention to the bunched-up red leather quickly approaching your face. The game even has realistic-looking blur effects for when you're struggling to rise after taking a hard hook to the jaw and coming crashing to the canvas- not that its ever happened to me, mind you.

However, this isn't some walk-in-the-park movement game. I don't know about you, but after every match, my body became very much acquainted with the feeling of SWEAT. Maybe it was a result of the 3-pound “mock gloves” I had in my hand, or maybe it was the fact that I had regularly thrown an average of 200+ punches per match, or maybe it was because I was dodging like Ali, left and right, even when I didn't need to... But man, did I feel the burn. And, surprisingly enough, that's half of the idea of this game- you can burn calories left and right. So this game doubles as an exercise program as well as a boxing game. Interesting? Yes. Smart? Well, maybe not...

I don't know if the point of exercise is what did this, or if it was just a plain mistake, but the actual boxing in this game is surprisingly unrealistic for a boxing game... yeah, it doesn't make sense to me either. Since Joe Average is most likely not a professional boxer, they've “slowed down” your opponents, but nearly to the point of absurdity. Nothing will make you groan more than seeing your opponent take a full THREE SECONDS to throw a single uppercut. Sure, they get faster past the first match... but still, the fact that the game relies so heavily on dodging (you can't block... at all) forces it to sacrifice way too much realism so everyone can play it.

Plus, you can forget about having your quick hands get past your opponent's guard- the only, ONLY times you'll be able to hit them is while they're throwing one of their straight jabs or when you've pounded them so much they don't have the strength to defend. And you can also forget about “working the body” or executing one of those other basic boxing strategies- the game has pre-determined how much damage each and every hit will do, and no matter how hard or soft you punch, or where you hit, your opponent (and you, for that matter) always get the same number of hits before they're down. Don't worry, they always get up. Three knock-downs for either of you and you're automatically out! So the game has basically scripted the whole match... the only variables are how long it takes and who wins first.

As a nice tribute to the unrealistic gameplay, the sound is also kind of silly and unrealistic. And that's looking at it the positive way. The sounds are incredibly distorted and amplified, so whenever you get hit you'll hear this odd (and loud) “gonging” sound, instead of the supposed “leather hitting skin” sound. Just about everything sounds along these lines, and why, WHY, WHY does the bell sound EVERY TIME I get up from a hard punch? The round's not over... it's never over, for that matter! What's with the bell!?

But still, even with the unrealism, I must admit that I got some fun out of this game. Come on, admit it- it's sort of an ego boost to throw a weak punch at some big, sweaty man and have them double over in pain. Although this game is basically a tool to get the average weight of America down (even if by 3.2 LBS overall), you still may be able to fool yourself into thinking you're actually out there in the ring, boxing. But you'll need a pretty big imagination...

Reviewer's Score: 5/10, Originally Posted: 08/31/04