Lords of EverQuest

"They have the nerve to put the name EverQuest on this??"

EverQuest. A name notoriously connected to obsession, divorce, and social disease. And why not? It’s a very addictive game. Worth every penny to play it, too.

When I first read the review, I thought ‘EverQuest in RTS? That’s going to be awesome! After all, it’s EVERQUEST!’ After I saw it on the store shelves I picked it up and read the box. It sounded okay, but definitely not what I thought it would be. I bought it and played it, each mission of the game growing more and more tedious. I kept playing, in hopes that it would play out, that it would be a game worth the 40 bucks. I have never been so wrong in my life!

Story: The story would have been alright if SOE and RapidEye – it should be Blind Eye – could have kept the story cohesive instead of changing topics in the middle of a mission. Frequently updated mission objectives might have been nice too.

Graphics: By far the best part of the game, but doesn’t hold a candle to the raging flame that is EverQuest. If you take more than 24 units into a battle, eventually blood will shoot from your eyes. And that’s the good news.

Sound: Not worth turning up your speakers. It would have been better had they gone a little more WarCraft-like and made the units angry after repeated clicks, but each unit, including the lord you select at the beginning of the campaign, have a max of 3 responses. Not to mention the annoying ambient sounds, such as crickets and owls hooting every 5 seconds or so.

Gameplay: I’d rather jump off a bridge without a bungee cord than play this game. You have a 50 unit cap, which means your army dies fairly quickly. You have only one source to gather; platinum. Apparently you don’t need lumber to build buildings. Not to mention the fact that units and buildings are somewhat expensive, and it takes forever to replenish your army.

Replayability: If you own this game and have played it once, that’s once too many times. Use the disk as a coaster, but don’t let it within miles of your computer.

Lords of EverQuest should have been called “Just give us your money because this game SUCKS!” DO NOT buy this game. Go out on a date. It’s money better spent.

SOE and ‘RapidEye’ – again, it should be Blind Eye – should be ashamed to have sullied the name EverQuest with this piece of trash. They should pay everyone that has played this game or thought about it 50 bucks for the inconvenience.

Reviewer's Score: 1/10, Originally Posted: 04/08/04