Peasant's Quest FAQ v0.2
By David J. Stein, Esq. (djs10@po.cwru.edu)
Written on August 2nd, 2004
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0. INTRODUCTION
Since the dawn of time, his presence has been a black mark on the land of
Peasantville, and his name made the peasants cower in terror. When the moon
grew full, the simple townfolk huddled together in the darkness of their tiny
hovels in anticipation of the impending horror. And the peasants quaked in fear
as the shadows grew long across the countryside, and as darkness crept across
the land like a pall. First they would hear the steady drumbeat of his
approaching footsteps, presaged only by the powerful reek of his sulfurous
breath. Their courage left them when they heard the cries of their neighbors as
the straw roofs of their thatch huts exploded into massive bonfires. As their
panic overcame them, they fled into the cursed evening by the light of the
conflagration that engulfed their former homes, driven onward by the bringer of
doom and the betrayer of hope, in the form of a hulking mass of rippling, green
muscles and singing hunger.
He is Trogdor, the Burninator.
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1. OK, THE REAL INTRODUCTION
Enough with the petty melodrama. Peasant's Quest is a game written by the good
folks at Homestarrunner.com, saddling you, as a simple peasant, with the
impossible task of defeating Trogdor, a massive dragon with fiery breath and
arms as large as weightlifters or California governors. The game is available
here:
http://homestarrunner.com/disk4of12.html
The game plays in the style of the old Sierra graphical adventure games, like
King's Quest and Quest For Glory. You move your character around using the
arrow keys (just tap once to start walking, and tap again in the same
direction to stop), and you interact with stuff by typing stuff (there's a
cursor at the bottom of the screen.) You can tap + (several times) to
increase your walking speed, or hit - (several times) if the game's just
too dang fast for you. Some examples of stuff you can type:
* SAVE (to save your game - must have a browser with cookies enabled)
* LOAD (to load a saved game)
* GET APPLE (etc.)
* INVENTORY (to see what you're carrying, and get descriptions of items)
* LOOK (to examine your current location)
* LOOK TREE (to, y'know, look at a tree)
* GIVE APPLE TO MAN
* TALK MAN
* XYZZY
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2. YE OLDE MAP(E)
Main map **** = unpassable water
========================================================================
| | | | | | |
| Archer's | Horse | | Well | *******Waterfall|
| tree | | | | ******************|
| | | | | ***** | |
====================================================****================
| | | | *** | |
| Hay | Mud | Archers | *** | Mountain ==> To
| | Puddle | | *** | Entrance Mountain
| | | | *** | |
=========================================***=================
| | | | **** | |
| Jhonka | Burned | Lake ******** | Inn |
| Cave | Cottage | Edge ******** | |
| | | | Fisherman | |
=============================================================
| | | | | |
| Closed | Wavy | THE | Cottage & | Lantern |
| Cottage | Tree | KERREK! | Bushes | Tree |
| | | | | |
=============================================================
============= =============
| | | |
| Inside | | In the |
| Cottage | | Inn |
| | | |
============= =============
The Mountain
========================================
| | | |
| Cliff | Outer | Trogdor's |
| Top | Sanctom | Lair |
| | | |
========================================
| |
| Cliff |
| Middle |
| |
==============
| |
| Cliff |
| Middle |
| |
==============
| |
| Cliff |
| Bottom |
| |
==============
===============================================================================
3. WALKTHROUGH
You start out at the Mountain Entrance, where a knight tells you that only
peasants can climb the mountain and take on Trogdor. In order to pass the
knight, you'll need to rise from your sub-peasant status:
* Dress like a peasant,
* Stink like a peasant, and
* Be on fire like a peasant
And off you go.
You may as well start by going back to your sad, little shack, or what remains
of it ("Burned Cottage" on the map above.) If you go inside and GET PAPER, you
will get a map of the whole area (just type MAP to view it.) No points, sadly.
Wander around for a bit, see where things are, and get your bearings. The
Kerrek is a big, minotaur guy who wanders around several screens on the west
part (well, uh, the left side, anyway) of the map.
First, go to the Well and look at it (LOOK WELL.) Something floating in it... a
bucket, and a crank... nope, not that easy. Try TURN CRANK and you'll see that
you need something to weigh down the bucket. (Be sure that you're relatively
close to the crank when you try to turn it, of course.)
Walk down a screen to the Archer, and TALK ARCHER. He'll mention his brother
Dongolev and will tell you to say HALDO to him, if you find him (2 points.)
Now go to the lake edge and LOOK - it has a sandy shore. If you LOOK SHORE,
you'll also notice that it has some pebbles. GET PEBBLES (1 point). Go back to
the well and PUT PEBBLES IN BUCKET (2 points), then TURN CRANK to get a MASK.
Look at the mask (type INVENTORY, go down to your mask, and hit Enter) - it's
probably pretty obvious what you need to do now.
Walk over to the Horse and WEAR MASK. The horse takes of and crashes through
the fence (2 points), and you can now go through the fence to the hidden
grotto. There's an archer here, shooting arrows at a tree - this must be
Dongolev. If you say HALDO, he'll leave and go back to his brother Mendelev
(3 points). Now you can look at the tree, and GET ARROW (2 points).
Now go talk to the archers - you'll find that you can practice some archery if
you get a "super item" - we'll have to go find something that qualifies. Go to
the Cottage & Bushes (near the Fisherman) and enter it (OPEN DOOR) to enter.
Talk to the woman to find out about the Jhonka robbing her of her... uh...
inheritance riches. Notice also that something is on the shelf - LOOK SHELF to
find that it's chicken feed, and then GET FEED (1 point) before you leave. As
you walk out the door, the woman will mention that her baby lost something
outside. Check all four bushes (GET BERRIES); the fourth bush you check will
have something in it (2 points.) Check your inventory to find out that it's a
SUPER TRINKET! Neato! Go back to the archers and GIVE TRINKET (2 points), and
you get to practice archery. You'll probably mess this up, so type PLAY again
to, well, play again.
Archery game: This is pretty easy. Line up the bow along the horizontal access
(taking the wind into account), then tap space. When the first triangle gets to
the red mark on the meter, hit Space again, and when the right arrow hits the
red mark, hit Space a third time. If you've lined it up right, you'll get a
bull's-eye. Lining it up horizontally is tough 'cause the wind changes, so this
really bad ASCII art will help:
*****
Wind: ********* * = white
Hard right - aim at 1 ***#####*** # = blue
Weak right - aim at 2 ***###*###*** @ = red
Dead - aim at 3 ***###*@*###*** O = yellow (bull's-eye!)
Weak left - aim at 4 ***###*@O@*###***
Hard left - aim at 5 ***###*@*###***
***###*###***
***#####***
/*********\
/// ***** \\\
1 2 3 4 5
Basically, if the wind is dead, aim right at the yellow bull's-eye; if it's
weak, aim at the inner edge of the blue region (#) on the side opposite the
wind; and if it's strong, aim at the outer edge of the blue region on the
side opposite the wind.
Play as many times as you need to win (three bull's-eyes out of five) to pick
up the SuperTime FunBow TM (3 points.) You have a bow, you have an arrow...
it's time to kick some Kerrek butt! Go find the Kerrek, and when you're on the
same screen as it, SHOOT KERREK (5 points.) After the melodramatic death scene,
LOOK KERREK to see that he had a belt buckle, and GET BUCKLE (10 points).
Notice the Zelda-esque "Got it!" pose. Oh yeah, as a bonus, you now stink like
a peasant. Incidentally, you can now (or any time in the future) go back to
the tree in the grotto and pick up another arrow (2 points), though you can't
use it for anything.
Now it's raining - go check out the Jhonka cave. He's out hopping about - and
he's hopping around a pile of loot! Try GET RICHES - no luck; try TALK JHONKA
while you're at it. Instead, go the mud puddle a few screens away, and just
walk into it now that it's muddy (2 points.) Now go left and ENTER HAY
(3 points) - you're now a walking bale of hay. Head back down to the Jhonka and
GET RICHES since he can't see you. Uh-oh, your disguise blew away... Well, he's
stupid, just say NO when he asks you if you took them. Now you have the riches
(7 points), so go back to the woman in the cottage (near the berries) and GIVE
RICHES (5 points.) Hmm - you now have a baby... what to do with this? A lot, as
it turns out...
First, go to the well and PUT BABY IN BUCKET (3 points.) Then TURN CRANK.
Surprisingly, you get your baby back, and a meatball sub! (and 2 points.)
Next, go to the west end of the lake and, um... THROW BABY. In addition to
getting your baby back (again), you'll also get a can of soda (and 5 points.)
Yes, this game is very strange.
Now head to the fisherman at the east end of the lake and TALK FISHERMAN. What
do you have that could be used as bait? Nothing, really, except... GIVE FEED,
and see that it's worth a shot. Then THROW FEED, and watch the fisherman pull
out... what is that, a squid? (2 points) Anyway, the fisherman goes back to
the Inn, and you can now go inside. You may as well try to unload the baby
(GIVE BABY) - the old man will give you some pills instead (5 points.)
Head to the closed cottage (near the Jhonka) and LOOK COTTAGE. Hmm... shoddy
stonework... that looks like a hint. LOOK STONE - hey, there's a stone loose!
GET STONE (2 points) to pull it out - that helps a little. Hmm - small hole...
baby... USE BABY to have it unlock the door (that's one talented baby!)
(2 points) Now enter the hut and open the dresser, and LOOK DRESSER. Hey,
that's something else you need - GET ROBE (10 points). Don't forget to CLOSE
DRAWER (1 point.)
Go back to the Inn and WEAR ROBE (3 points), and now GET A ROOM (3 points.)
When you wake up (you are sleeping on a concrete slab after all), the pantry
door will be open. LOOK PANTRY to see what's there, and then try GET POT
that's on the top shelf. Of course, you'll fumble it and get "Old Man Rub"
all over yourself... eeeewww. (and 2 points.) Anyway, fumble around until you
leave the Inn (3 points.)
Go to the lantern tree, and notice that the lantern is now lit. When you go
near it, your head will catch fire (10 points) - and you're now a real peasant!
Congratulations, uh, I guess... Now you can walk right by the knight (7 points)
and - wait, floppy drives? - just hit Enter a few times.
Now you're at the cliff base - CLIMB to start climbing up the cliff, and watch
out for the boulders. When you reach the top (3 points), you'll find yourself
at the entrance to Trogdor's cave. Go inside to the outer sanctum (hey, nice
beaded curtain) and walk through... well, first talk to the Three Keepers of
Trogdor and answer their questions (5 points, 5 points, 5 points) to get the
Trog-Shield, the Trog-Helmet, and the Trog-Sword. Alternately, you can give
them the items they ask for (the meatball sub, the soda, and the pills.)
Either way, when you're finished, walk through the beaded curtain...
Holy crap, it's Trogdor! He's huge, and you're a tiny brown pixel! Don't walk
too close to him - instead, THROW SWORD to wake him up (7 points) and get his
attention. TALK TROGDOR (10 points) to declare revenge... and... uh, become
toast.
That's it - that's the end of the game. Congratulations!
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4. INVENTORY LIST
Here is a complete inventory list:
arrow robe
baby soda
kerrek belt meatball sub
chicken feed super trinket
SuperTime FunBow TM TrogHelmet
monster maskus TrogShield
pebbles TrogSword
pills map
riches t-shirt
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5. POINTS LIST
Here's a total list of points for the game:
TALK ARCHER 2 points
GET PEBBLES 1 point
PUT PEBBLES IN BUCKET 2 points
WEAR MASK 2 points
HALDO 3 points
GET ARROW 2 points
(GET ARROW #2) (2 points)
GET FEED 1 point
GET BERRIES (find trinket) 2 points
GIVE TRINKET 2 points
PLAY (and winning the archery game) 3 points
SHOOT KERREK 5 points
GET BUCKLE 10 points
Entering the mud puddle 2 points
ENTER HAY 3 points
GET RICHES 7 points
GIVE RICHES 5 points
PUT BABY IN BUCKET 3 points
TURN CRANK 2 points
THROW BABY 5 points
THROW FEED 2 points
GIVE BABY (to the innkeeper) 5 points
GET STONE 2 points
USE BABY 5 points
(USE BABY repeatedly) (2 points)
GET ROBE 10 points
CLOSE DRAWER 1 point
WEAR ROBE 3 points
GET A ROOM 3 points
GET POT 2 points
Leaving the inn with pot on head 3 points
Getting caught on fire 10 points
TALK KNIGHT (with peasant status) 7 points
CLIMB (and reaching the mountaintop) 3 points
Passing Keeper #1 (trivia or sub) 5 points
Passing Keeper #2 (trivia or soda) 5 points
Passing Keeper #3 (trivia or pills) 5 points
THROW SWORD 7 points
TALK TROGDOR 10 points
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6. FAQ
Q. Wait, you're kidding, right? You end up toast?
A. Nope. That's it. Trogdor is invincible. Tough cookies.
Q. So there's no way to kill him?
A. Look at him standing there, with a tiny sword sticking out of him. Look
at you, the small brown smear on the ground. Did you really think there
would be a way to kill him?
Q. What kind of an ending is that?!
A. I dunno. Don't bitch at me. I didn't write it.
Q. What's with the point system?
A. You don't have to do everything to finish the game. In fact, you end up
with more than 150 points if you do.
Q. Maybe there's a way to finish with exactly 150 points AND kill Trodgor!
A. Could be. If you find it, let me know. Have fun stormin' the castle.
Q. What castle?
A. Uh, it's a quote from The Princess Bride. Never mind.
Q. What's the deal with the naked weirdo?
A. :shrug: Some perverted inside joke from the guys at Homestarrunner.com,
I presume. Ask the knight about him. See the "fun stuff" section below.
Q. How do I get past the waterfall?
A1. The answer should be obvious.
A2. Try reading the T-shirt you've been carrying around.
A3. Try giving the T-shirt to the Jhonka.
A4. If the Jhonka doesn't want it, do some Internet research about Jhonkas -
specifically, how they breed.
A5. Your research should reveal where to find the peacock feather, and the
ball gag, and what to do with them once you find them. Using them
properly will get you past the waterfall and into the thief's den.
A6. Don't forget to stock up on Old Man Rub for the peacock feather
ceremony.
A7.
(this space intentionally left blank)
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7. Fun Stuff
This stuff is pointless and/or will get you killed, but try it if you're
really, really bored.
The naked guy near the wavy tree: If you stand around the tree long enough,
you'll see a guy pop his head out from behind the other tree on the same
screen. You can then talk to him - his name is Naked Ned (TALK NED). Oh yeah,
the robe belongs to him, apparently (it's embroidered "N.N.")
Kick the horse
Throw the baby
Search the same bush more than once
Sleep in the woman's cottage
Get the chair or the pillow in the woman's cottage
Search haystack
Walk up to the Kerrek
Walk up to Trogdor
Pick up the pebbles more than once
Tell the Jhonka that you took his treasure
Say "Haldo" to Dongolev before talking to his brother
Say "Haldo" to anyone who's not Dongolev
Look at the lantern
Take the broom in the closed cottage
Look at the arrow tree
Walk in front of Dongelov as he's practicing his archery
Look at the painting in the Inn
Look at the footprints
Try lighting the lantern
Pick up the dresser
"Knock until knuckles bleed" on the closed cottage
"Cut off arms and legs" (after pulling the stone out of the hut)... and "try"
Look in the hole after you've used the baby to open the door
"Look sign" and "Kill sign" (by the knight)
Ask the knight about Trogdor, the jhonka, the kerrek, and Ned
Notice the Dragon's-Lair animation when you die!
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8. Bugs
The scoring system is kind of messed up. You can use the baby more than once,
getting multiple points for the same action. Finish with a score of 10,000!
W00P!
You can also wreck your game by walking around the waterfall. You can actually
walk into it, and, uh, walk around the frame of the web applet. Sometimes you
can escape by just walking downward (you end up near the Inn), but sometimes
you can't get back and it's a one-way trip.
Saving your game after you've encountered the Kerrek (but before you've killed
it) is problematic - even if it's not on the same screen, the game tells you
you can't save while the Kerrek is chasing you.
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9. Acknowledgements
Thanks to StrongBad and the crew for livening up many boring work days.
Thanks to Trogdor for bringing burnination-fu to the world.
That's about it.
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FAQ copyright (c) David J. Stein, Esq., August 2nd, 2004.
