Kingdom of Loathing

"When life gives you lemons, cocktailcraft them into a bunch of kiwi~!"

Introduction:
Kingdom of Loathing, commonly referred to as KoL, is an Online-RPG game created by two men known as Jick and Mr. Skullhead in the game. KoL is completely online, requiring no download, and creating an account takes about a minute. All it requires is a name, password, and an email. None of the random personal information stuff here. Choose a class, get the activation code, and voila, you're in. Simple to play for those that wish to keep it simple, but is also very complicated and detailed for the hardcore.

Story:
The story is rather simple, a Naughty Sorceress has kidnapped King Ralph XI, and when she did, a bunch of monsters came out of no where. Now, the Council of Loathing (the people that are trying to save the Kingdom) is getting adventurers to go out and save King Ralph XI and restore order. One of the “lucky” adventurers happens to be you!

Graphics:
The graphics of KoL is composed of simple, yet hilarious, black and white drawings which are not much more then stick figures. There is no color, except for headers and your HP and MP turning red when they are low. Besides that, not color at all. I personally think that the graphic style of this game is wonderfully created and provides for lots of fun without the side effect of bleeding eyes from staring at bright colors for too long, like in other games.

Sound:
There is no sound in KoL whatsoever, except for RadioKoL, a radio run by player DJs, which can be listened to if you wish. Listening to RadioKoL provides no benefits besides music and the chatter of DJs, which can be quite hilarious at times.

Text:
Where the game lacks in terms of graphics (which isn't that much in my opinion), it makes up for it heavily with its text. You may think of KoL as a text-based browser game, with some pictures to add to it. The text of every item in the game is different, and customized for that specific item, with thousands of puns, jokes, and references. Each monster has their own combat messages, and those also contain even more puns, jokes, and references. There is so much detail in terms of text that is it surprising that they even managed to put this much detail into the text. The text of KoL is what I think makes KoL so unique and fun to play. You do not have to read the text when you are running low on time, but when you do have lots of time, reading the text will have you “laughing out loud” every couple of seconds.

Gameplay:
In KoL, you get one quest from the Council of Loathing every level except the first level, and you basically do those quests for them for a reward. After completing eleven quests for the Council, you receive your final quests, to take down the Naughty Sorceress and save King Ralph XI. If you succeed in doing this, you are given the option of “ascending to the higher plane”, or ascension. Ascending allows you to reincarnate as a different class or the same class, and you can also choose to have several restrictions placed on you to make things harder if you wish. Lastly, you get to have one of your skills made permanent, meaning that you do not have to re-learn the skill, ever again for that character, unless you do a specific restriction (which is too spoilery to be noted in this review, but you can easily find out by asking around) which prevents you from having any of your skills from your previous lives. In battles, you can either choose to “Fight” with whatever weapon you have equipped (or with your bare hands/head/feet/etc. if you like doing that), use an item, use a skill (skills must be bought or made permanent in a previous ascension), or run away. Successfully killing the monster will get you stats (covered in next section), meat (the currency of the game), and item drops.

Leveling:
KoL has three stats, Muscle, Mysticality, and Moxie. Muscle can be thought as Strength in most other games. It is what allows you to hit other stronger. Mysticality can be thought of as Magic in most other games. It allows you to cast stronger spells. Moxie is the same thing as Dexterity and Evasion, or the stat that most thief-classes would use. It allows you to dodge your enemies. Your class will have one main stat. That main stat will either be Muscle, Mysticality, or Moxie. To level up, you must raise your main stat high enough by gaining experience in that stat. To gain experience in that stat, you must kill monsters (there are other methods as well) until you have enough. Leveling up will open up new quests, skills, equipment, and allow you to survive in tougher areas.

Replayability:
I find that the thing that keeps me hooked to KoL is its replayability, which, out of a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 is the highest, the replayability would be 11. There is just so much to do, that the amount of people who have done everything in the game is probably zero. If you consider getting one of every item in the game as something to do in the game, then the amount of people that have completely beaten the game would be zero, as no one has all of the items in the game. The main thing that most people try to do is to collect all of the skills in the game. This alone is a formidable task, with over 100 skills in the game, that is over 100 ascensions that must be done. There is also a plethora of trophies and tattoos that can be collected and flaunted in the game. There is over 75 trophies and over 50 tattoos currently in the game, and more come into existence from updates sometimes. Collecting items can also be goal, with over 3000 items in the game, that is a goal that will last you a lifetime. Or you can choose to collect a specific item, and try to have the most of that item in the game. Whatever goal you decide to set for yourself, attaining that goal will be a long and tiring journey. However, it will also be a ridiculously fun journey as well.

Updates to the Game:
KoL is updated rather irregularly, but Jick has noted that he tries to get an update once a week. There are often minor updates to the game about once a week to a week and a half, and there are huge updates every couple of months. Update can range from typos being edited to completely new areas being released. Although it is irregular, just playing the game will pass the time so quickly that you will not notice the time span between updates. Updates also never stop coming, so don't worry about a game that stops being updated after a while, as KoL continues to be updated.

Cost:
KoL is completely free, and requires no payment whatsoever to access EVERYTHING in the game. Unlike those games which let you access half of the game for free, KoL will allow you to do anything and everything in the game for zero cents. However, donating $10 to the game will net you an item called “Mr. Accessory”. Mr. Accessories allow you to buy powerful items, but they are not necessities. Mr. Accessories only allow you to buy items, and never areas to adventure in. The items able to be bought with the Mr. Accessories are necessities for those doing insane speed runs, but else, they are not necessary. Though they will help you out, you do not have to have them, and if you choose to get them, you can always farm meat and buy them with the meat, instead of spending real life money.

Time Dedication Required:
In KoL, almost all actions require the spending of “adventures”, which can be though of as turns. You gain 40 adventures per day (the number gained per day can be increased however), and eating or drinking can further increase your adventures. When your adventures run out, you must wait for the next day to get more adventures. Since you only have 40 adventures, it does not take that long to spend them, only about 10 to 15 minutes per day is required. However, for those truly dedicated, it is possible to get hundreds of adventures in a day and use them – though this is not necessary.

PvP:
The PvP (Player versus Player) system is rather simple. You get a certain number of times you can fight that day and you can choose people to fight. Winning raises your rank and losing lowers it. Most of the game is you versus an enemy, rather then other players, so KoL is not for those that like to kill their friends for fun.

Community:
The community of KoL is wonderful. There are many nice people willing to point you in the right direction, and it is easy to make friends. There is an in-game chat that you can use to talk with others while playing the game, which adds another aspect to enjoy within the game. Even after running out of adventures to spend, you can stay and chat with others. People that are “not nice” are banned from the chat, so have no fear in entering the chat. There is also an official forum for KoL, where thousands of players can talk about the game or anything else. The forum is moderated by many moderators, so like the chat, have no fear in entering it! Additionally, there is an official wiki for KoL, filled with information gathered by the community. It is easy to make friends in KoL, and there are many ways in obtaining friends. The community is one of the best aspects of KoL, as childish and immature players are rare because the number of enemies is not limited and you do not have to fight over who's kill is who's.

Age Requirement:
There is no “official” age requirement for KoL, as it is a online game, and they cannot check your age. However, it is recommended that you be 13+, if possible. The game can be enjoyed by an age, no matter how young, or no matter how old, but the game contains some swearing and slight sexual references. There is also drinking and drugs in the game. Though they are mostly little amounts of them, for very young children, they may wish to wait a couple of years. It is perfect for those entering their teens and older. There are many references to “old” subjects that could only be known if you are fairly old, which is why the game is fun for those who are old.

Final Note:
With over a million players and growing, KoL is one of the best online-RPGs out there. It is flawless and perfect in every way, like a diamond. KoL is a definite must-play, it is too good to pass up, considering it is free and does not require a huge amount of time dedication, unless you wish to. I highly recommend that you go and create an account right now. There is nothing else you should be doing. Go play now.

Reviewer's Score: 10/10, Originally Posted: 11/13/08

Game Release: Kingdom of Loathing (US, 01/31/03)