Bachelor Party

"What sorry peice of crap"

Bachelor Party

During the Atari era, bad games were coming out left and right. Mystique decided to cash in on the overwhelming amount of horny teenagers who bought Atari games, by releasing Bachelor Party. This game could not possible be any worse. This is by far the worse game I have ever played in my entire life. Bachelor Party is basicly a clone of Breakout, only not near as fun. The screen has been rotated 90 degrees clockwise. You play as a container of spanish fly. Your job is to bounce the man off the spanish fly and into one of the naked ladies on the other side of the screen. You clear the level in this game by having sex with every lady on the screen. It sounds good, but it is really not.

Graphics 1/10: The graphics in this game are terrible. I would have never ever known that my character was a container of spanish fly, had I not looked it up in the manual. It just looks like a block with another block sticking out of it to me. The man looks more like sometype of insane human genetics experiment gone wrong, as do the ladies. Once again you would never know they were people unless you looked in the manual. There are absolutely no backgrounds, and nothing else going on on the screen. Even compared to other Mystique games, this one really drops the ball in the graphics department.

Gameplay 1/10: Like I said it is a Breakout clone, only it is not near as fun. Controlling the spanish fly is impossible, and the man hardly ever gets past you. The spanish fly also jerks ackwardly.

Music 1/10: The only music is at the beginning when you start the game. The rest is played in complete silence. Even the opening music gets on my nerves.

Replay 1/10: You will probably never play through this game to begin with so the chances of you ever replaying are slim to none. Even if you do finish this game, I couldn't imagine sitting through Bachelor Party twice.

Overall 1/10: There is no reason to buy this game. The graphics are so bad that you can't even tell the characters are naked, so there is really nothing to laugh at. I wouldn't take this game if someone offered it to me for free. Stay as far away from the piece of crap as you can.

Reviewer's Score: 1/10, Originally Posted: 07/21/02, Updated 07/21/02