Oink!

"She's a brick house..."

Fairy tales help define our childhoods. We're constantly bombarded with incredible tales of heroes, wizards, animals, monsters, and everything else in between, with some fundamental lesson to be learned when everything is said and done. We've known of Robin Hood, hiss merry men, Sleeping Beauty, the frog Prince, Pinocchio, and plenty of other magical beings that live near the border of the childhood and adulthood imagination. These characters can teach us something about life, to reinforce society's values and expectations. And we as children soak it all up, letting ourselves be spoon-fed the outdated cookie cutter ideals that parents will undoubtedly pass on to their children. And although we outgrow the belief of the existence of these ancient heroes and villains, their moral will be constantly planted within us, just waiting to be seeded into the future generation.

Take the Three Little Pigs for example. These lively hunks of pork have been living the high life for years, building respective houses in the local forest. But despite their architectural prowess, these pigs are still at the low end of the food chain, just waiting for some hungry predator to come along and gnaw the fat off their bones. Thus enters the Big Bad Wolf, a deranged sociopath with a burning hunger for raw and bloody pork. In the story, Mr. Wolf goes to the individual houses and attempts to trick the pigs into unlocking the door, letting him gobble up the swine until his furry belly was satisfied. However, these pigs aren't completely inept, and refuse to let him in. But instead of busting through a window or something equally easy, the wolf decides to blow the houses away using nothing more than his smelly breath. Though successful in his first two attempts, Mr. Wolf is outclassed by the third house, made entirely of bricks and cement. Thus ends the fairy tale of the Three little Pigs, proving that technological advances and cleverness are the keys to survival.

However, things don't end so happily ever after. While the classic Three Little Pigs managed to stay alive, their Atari 2600 counterparts aren't so lucky. The Big Bad Wolf is back, and he's ready to kick some swine ass. And unfortunately for our brave trio of pork chops, Mr. Wolf isn't going to simply breath their houses away. Recognizing the futility of blowing hot air at a brick wall, the shaggy villain has returned in full force, toting a laser gun that can blast through even the finest of the pigs' craftsmanship. He won't even bother knocking on the door or try any small talk. He'll start up his new toy, and start melting the walls of the house away, brick by brick. Soon there'll be a hole big enough for the Wolf to shoot through, incinerating the inner decor of your humble abode and slowly drawing you into his furry clutches. However, all is not lost. You're in command of one of the Three Little Pigs, and you've got to save the house before it becomes an all-pork buffet. While the Wolf is shooting his way through the wall, your swine brethren will pass bricks down to you, leaving you to plug the holes that your foe has made. Thus the struggle of destruction and construction continues, with only a few layers of bricks separating you from the jaws of the rabid beast.

Unfortunately, you're fighting a losing battle. While the constant stockpiling of bricks may be an immense help to your survival, the Wolf will be constantly on the attack, shooting out brick after brick to get his claws on you. Defending the first house will feel like a breeze, until you accidentally misplace a brick and get grabbed by the Wolf's laser beam. Then you'll scamper off to the second house, where your battle will begin afresh. However, your foe's speed will increase with each passing house. He'll amble around like a sloth during the first house stage, but he'll be wiping out your walls in mere seconds by the time you reach the third level. Also, the controls can prove a little awkward, as the game requires the precise placement of bricks. If you can't get yourself in the proper position, you'll just hold onto the brick while the Wolf continues to blast his way to you.You'll have to pick up the pace, running back and forth between the walls, trying desperately to block the gaping holes left in the Wolf's wake of destruction and property defacement. But eventually the holes will get too big, and you'll get caught within the predator's grasp. And all you can do is watch helplessly as the brave pig squeals in horror and struggles in vain against his eventual bloody demise.

Thankfully, the graphics of the Atari don't allow us to watch as the poor piglet is ripped to shreds. You'll hear his simulated squeals of pain, but he'll somehow manage to get away from the Wolf's grasp long enough to run off the screen. However, we all know that he'll be run down eventually, and that the Big Bad Wolf will truly have the last laugh. Despite the sinister implications, the game does an impressive job of portraying the fairy tale creatures we all know and love. The pigs are portrayed in the appropriate shade of pink, complete with the massive snout and the curly little tail. The wolf is presented in a stark gray coat of fur, his bushy tail and enormous jaws clearly present and accounted for. Even the houses have a fair amount of detail, complete with triangle roofs, brick chimneys, and different colors to signify the different materials that make up the structures. Considering what we've grown accustomed to on the Atari 2600, this graphical display outshines even the gameplay that it's trying to portray.

Due to its fresh spin on a classic story, Oink! will go down in history as one of the quirkier titles for the Atari library. Unfortunately, its lesser-known status won't grant it much of a fan following. Instead, many will see this game as the inverted version of Breakout. The constant replenishing of bricks and the challenge of placement make this game something to consider. However, the controller demands offset the flow of the game, turning this struggle of life and death into nothing more than a chore for the average gamer. However, the use of classic characters and a surprisingly good presentation make the frustration worthwhile. If you're ever in the need of something a little off-kilter and moderately challenging at the same time, Oink! offers a decent alternative to the tried and true Atari games that we've all grown to love.

Reviewer's Score: 7/10, Originally Posted: 03/23/05