Keystone Kapers

"Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?"

There's something strangely fascinating about law enforcement and police chase television shows. Whenever you happen to see one of these programs, you'll usually be treated to some crooks dumb enough to try running from a cop car, or some dramatic hostage situations. There' be video footage of some hoodlum robbing a convenience store, or a driver ambling around in a drunken stupor. You'll get to see some idiot in a truck recklessly plowing his way through oncoming traffic, or watch as some poor fool tries to escape the authorities on foot. But no matter these bumbling baddies have in mind, they are always caught and brought to justice. It's like an unwritten rule; the bad guy is always caught, no matter how reckless or creative he may think he truly is.

However, things don't always have such a happy ending. Keystone Kapers takes us to a place where evil prevails, and justice is merely dependent on chance. You are Officer Kelly, a veteran cop with more experience and respect for the law than the rest of your donut-chugging brethren combined. As the sun rises on a beautiful Sunday morning, you observe a suspicious character wandering around the mall. Your fears are confirmed; Harry Hooligan has returned, and he's up to no good. This dangerous felon is looting stores left and right, nabbing priceless goods in an effort to enrich both his life and his financial status. Being the ace police officer that you are, you can't just sit around and watch as this devious thief gets away with his ill-gotten gains. With nothing more than a billy club clenched firmly in your hand, it's up to you to take this felon back into slammer where he belongs.

The chase begins with you in the dead center the lowest level of the mall. Somewhere out in the wide expanse of shops and restaurants, your mighty foe is gorging himself on everything that isn't bolted down. With a building of this size, it'll be hard to track him down. Luckily for you, you've got full access to the mall's security radar, complete with corresponding dots for both you and your prey. Once you've pinpointed him on the map, it's up to you to get to his position, take him, down, and bring him to the justice that he so rightly deserves. You'll have to navigate your way down the hallways, past the sporting goods and through the intimate apparels, braving whatever hardships that may come across your path. You'll eventually come across a few escalators and an elevator, thus giving you access to different parts of the mall and getting you ever closer to your dangerous adversary. If you can master navigating through the levels of shopping goods you'll have your target wearing handcuffs in no time.

However, things aren't as simple as running the thief down and bringing his reign of terror to an end. While your foe is dumb enough to break the law with a cop only a few hundred feet away, he is smart enough to run away from you. If you try to be clever by taking the elevator and cutting off his escape route, the smooth criminal will spot your strategy and change direction, hopping from level to level in an attempt to lose you. Unfortunately, you can't afford to play this game of cat and mouse. As each second ticks away, a timer takes away any potential points that you can score. If the timer runs to zero, your target will escape, leaving nothing but disappointment and failure in his wake. Not only do you have to worry about chasing down your foe, but you'll also have to deal with the countless obstacles in your way. You'll have to dodge shopping carts, beach balls, radios, toy biplanes, and whatever other deathtraps that await you. While these things may not seem threatening, they take away chunks of your precious time, leaving you scrambling to catch your elusive foe.

As the chase heats up, chances are you won't be able to slow down and enjoy the beauty of the pixilated shopping mall that you're defending. The walls are painted in a dark green, separated by tan ceilings and floors and connected with zigzagging escalators and a tiny blue elevator. If you manage to make it up to the roof, you can see the city skyline and sunrise rendered at the top of the screen. Harry Hooligan is decked out in some fancy black and white striped threads, making easy to spot in all the chaos. Officer Kelly dons a traditional blue officer's uniform, complete with the appropriate bowler hat. While all of these details are nothing more than bright blobs of color and masses of pixels, the overall images are portrayed well. Considering some of Activision's other less spectacular presentations, Keystone Kapers stands proudly above its peers.

The most endearing thing about this game is that it portrays something that goes on in everyday life. There aren't any alien spacecrafts to wipe out, no epic romps through jungles or rivers. All we have is an honest cop and a slick robber squaring off in a contest of wits and skill. Hell, you could see this kind of stuff on television. The difference is that Keystone Kapers proves far more entertaining than any reality TV show. Its fast-paced challenge and addictive gameplay will have you coming back time and again, hoping for just one more shot at the glory of administering some tough justice on a dangerous foe. Thus the chase continues deep into the Atari 2600 library and into gaming history itself, a game that should be cherished and remembered by all.

Reviewer's Score: 8/10, Originally Posted: 05/31/05