P.N. 03

"Not ready for this jelly"

Strange things are amiss at Nintendo Central. While we currently have three excellent consoles all being marketed toward a target audience (XBox for adults, PS2 for teens/young adults, GameCube for women and children), basic rules of marketing still apply: SEX SELLS. Strong female archetypes generally do well among gamers but every now and then, someone with either gravity-defying breasts or a posterior you could fit your entire family vacation package in (or both) comes along to set everything back a couple of years.

Capcom’s P.N. 03 for the Nintendo GameCube system has reached us and hopes were incredibly high: a highly stylized, graphics heavy game that ISN’T a Street Fighter or a Mega Man? It delivers on some levels and yet, in others...it so doesn’t.

The game is more or less centered on a lone protagonist; a shapely female soldier with the uninspired name of Vanessa Schneider. Upon one of those ever-present and oft-used routine military missions, Vanessa is attacked and left for dead. The military rebuilds her and outfits her with a “spray-painted-on” bodysuit that is equipped with more firepower than you could possibly imagine. Now, spurred on by equal parts revenge and throbbing bass music, Vanessa acts as the powerhouse, Product Number 03. The bodysuit is attached to the spine, so whenever she lets loose with a powerful sonic blast to her enemies, we’re treated to a peacock-like display of gadgetry sprouting from her back a la “Ghost in the Shell.” We almost always see Vanessa with her back turned to us, rear end shaking in time to the game’s relentless techno beat and snapping her fingers to the rhythm. Her face is covered by oversized sunglasses and sweeping bangs, with futuristic music headphones just peeking out from under the ears.

The music plays a large part in not only the feel of the game but the execution of the character’s gameplay as well. Vanessa never, ever stops moving. Even when, as a player, you get stuck behind something or reaction time is slow or even if you’re about to DIE, Vanessa keeps the beat. Every attack move is also a dance move. You don’t merely pivot from side-to-side, you pirouette. Not only that, but upon firing sonic blasts from the palms, you can’t help noticing Vanessa still moving her hands in time to the music. Some may see it as a tad obnoxious, but you’ve got to hand it to Capcom’s attention to character detail. Another small but impressive detail are the energy trails streaming off of the joints in Vanessa’s body armor. The outdoor texture mapping (most of it a desert wasteland) can be dusty and hard to see; the energy trails instantly keep the eye focused on the character when she is either lost in a dust storm or under bright lightsources.

Speaking of texture mapping, this is the area where we start to see things winding down as far as the creativity outside of the character goes. Interiors are appropriately futuristic enough, with smooth, rounded surfaces and a host of geometric metallic shapes serving as wallpaper. The lightsources and resulting shadows are varied and correct. The only problem is....that’s all there is. Nothing beyond how “cool” and “futuristic” the indoor looks really grabs the eye. In fact, it seems the palette of colors stops somewhere in between blue and white. In all this drabness, it’s easy to see how a player would have no trouble getting lost or finding out where to go to achieve the next level. Outside, it doesn’t get much better. As stated earlier, a lot of the exterior is a wasteland and while the character grooving, dancing, and shooting things gives the scene something of an “Apocalypse Now” feel, there isn’t much to look at. It’s another bad sign when rocks and other tertiary objects de-materialize once you run just past them.

But what, exactly, is it that Vanessa is fighting against? That is a question you could well wear out the day with. There are displays of text “debriefing” sandwiched between missions, but little info clueing us in as to who exactly Vanessa, her story, her benefactors, her enemies, or even what the point of all this really is. There are no voices to speak of, hardly any NPC characters (unless you count the all the flying, weapon-laden machines firing back at you), and no discernable objectives other than to kick butt while oggling your character’s own. A well-produced, non-interactive opening sequence lets us see our hero’s abilities in full action, but doesn’t provide much of a back-story. Vanessa’s antagonists, laser-firing machines, are all extremely hard to see and never easy to figure out. Because they uniformly attack from far off, the only thing to do as a player is to eliminate before being quickly eliminated yourself. There is never any time to get a close-up perspective of the attackers...more evidence that a greater emphasis was given to the lead character’s design and not much else.

That all the creativity, it seems, was poured into the look and physics of Vanessa and the environment of the world she inhabits was basically an afterthought is the big problem with this game. On a purely visual level, P.N. 03 works. But when you start asking the big questions like “why is she fighting with these machines?” and “what is really going on here?” the player is bound to be disappointed. What’s even more strange is the fact that this is a game designed by Capcom who are known for their fun, cartoony, and sexually non-threatening characters. Plus, it’s designed solely for the GameCube, notorious for being popular with prepubescent and teenaged boys. Yet, when your control of the camera angle goes about as far as the character’s sides and never losing those precious butt-shots, you have to wonder who exactly this game’s intended audience is. Obviously, the character was designed to sell this game. She has a strongly defined sexuality, a stylish costume, cool powers, and literally a behind that doesn’t stop. But with a cookie-cutter back story, zero personality (you can’t even see her face, let alone her mind), and a name you can barely remember (Vanessa? Schneider?!?), it’s hard to say if this game will have a long lifespan. Or even a sequel; which is something that the future creators of this year’s P.N. 04 (obviously a reference to the single-digit years we live in) should probably think about.

Reviewer's Score: 6/10, Originally Posted: 01/26/04