Banjo-Kazooie

"Nice Circus. Now All That's Left are the Ducks."

Back when plat-formers seemed like they'd never die off, games like Super Mario 64 and Donkey Kong 64 ruled the world. They had all the necessary qualities – money drawing characters, solid game play, good graphics, and probably more than I'd care to mention. Some would say that these games were one of a kind. And they really were. Few other games since have been able to capture that magic, that heroic stanza that could only come from a fat plumber or a dancing gorilla. You might as well complete the circus act if you're going to use them, though.

What, they already did!?

I must have forgotten to mention the other plat-former that came out back then. Meet Banjo. He's a bear. And his pal, Kazooie, is a chicken. Er…bird. Together they form the game's namesake, Banjo-Kazooie.

Banjo-Kazooie finds Banjo's sister captured by an old witch going through a mid-life crisis. It seems being a witch leaves a rather green, warty tone to your skin, and being the old love nut that she is, Grunty is looking to steal Banjos sister's beauty. When she does, she'll be beautiful again – if there ever was a time when she was – while Banjo's poor sister gets the ugly treatment. But you couldn't expect Banjo to let that happen, right? Being the kind, loving brother that he is, Banjo and his chicken friend Kazooie set out to bring back peace to their world while stopping Grunty's beauty ambitions once and for all.

There's a small problem, though. Instead of being in some easily accessible room right across the street, Grunty holed herself up in a gigantic mountain of sorts, complete with tricks and traps and…puzzle paintings? No, Grunty isn't an artist who could never fully realize her dream. Yes, those paintings are actually the “Gates” to the other worlds Banjo and Kazooie will be visiting. Located in those worlds are Puzzle Pieces, the game's main form of completion that is needed in order to finish off Grunty's other unfinished slop jobs. If Banjo wants to access more of the mountain, he'll have to collect those pieces.

Don't think they'll be out in the open, however. No, why would they ever do that? After getting that first freebie for access to the beginning world, it's up to you to scout out, and in some cases, beat up people for those pieces. There are generally set amounts of them in each world, with different challenges to obtain each one. Some are easy to get, such as just bumbling into one on a road, but as you start to move further into the game, you'll find yourself running the gamut from beating out a room full of pirates to speeding across a small section of bridges in order to get to a disappearing piece.

Of course, just as you'll be treated to a wide variety of challenges to get some of the pieces, so will you be treated to an astoundingly large variety of worlds. At first things won't seem so impressive – a mountain with a kook for a witch doctor up top. But later on you'll blow through some of the finest masterpieces to ever grace the N64. Gigantic Moutains? Check. Searing deserts complete with ugly mummies and magic carpet ride ala Aladdin? Check. Freezing snow top peeks with a fat walrus for a host? Check. Running through saw blades inside a gigantic metal fish looking for that last puzzle piece? Priceless.

Things like that make Banjo-Kazooie one heck of a game, but if it were just running around, you'd probably get bored as time went on. Fully accounted for. Not only can this bear run around, but he can also do a wide variety of moves. Some of them are natural to plat-formers, like his basic roll and bear claw swipe. Others, though, truly test the limits of this game's realism. You know how birds lay eggs? Well, Banjo likes to speed that process up. A lot. Using Kazooie as a sort of machine gun, Banjo can fire off egg projectiles at rapid velocity – out of Kazooie's mouth. Talk about Cluck U Chicken. Not only does that defy the laws of physics, but it also gives enemies a nasty case of Kazooie's halitosis. Another thing that defies the laws of physics is Kazooie's ability to carry Banjo in flight. If you manage to collect enough red feathers – scattered conveniently in areas where you need to fly, of course – then Kazooie will be able to take off if she can find a launch pad. Once in the air you'll be able to do multiple things, but air travel is usually limited to getting up to higher heights. I think Kazooie would die if much more were needed.

But that's not all (heh). Located on almost every world available lies a kook. To that kook's credit, his parents named him Mumbo Jumbo. He's a witch doctor. If you grease his boney hands with enough Mumbo tokens, you'll be able to transform Banjo and Kazooie into a wide variety of things, from Alligators to washing machines. The tokens themselves are scattered across your stomping grounds, but when you do collect enough of them to have Mumbo transform you into one of his zany creations, multiple game play possibilities become available. Let's face it, Banjo is a big boy, and being as though he probably weighs 500 something pounds, swimming can be a bit of a problem. Being an alligator fixes that and more. Not only do you get to swim with ease, but some nice pointy teeth take up residence in your mouth.

When you're in that alligator form, you'll probably want to see Banjo's newly acquired teeth, right? The graphics allow you to do just that. Although they can be incredibly pixilated at times, the graphics of Banjo-Kazooie manage to do a wonderful job of portraying out dynamic duo in action. Banjo's fir comes off in a breezy soft brown as he does is jumps, Kazooie's feathers can be seen bristling off as she struggles to keep Banjo's fat hide in the air, Mumbo-Jumbo can be seen in all of his boney glory. The game also features a couple of cut-scenes, but most, if not all, are regulated to text based dialogue on the actual game screen. At least they were nice enough to give you that game over cut-scene every time you save the darn game.

Of course, every time you save that darn game you'll also hear something. That's Grunty's cackling (and appearance with newfound beauty). Although to some it may be forgettable (which is probably its biggest problem), the tunes of Banjo-Kazooie manage to get the job done with style. Tracks are decently varied, and tunes fit the scenes in which they're meant to appear in decently enough. For instance, in the Halloween inspired world, you'll hear a type of spooky music. In the desert world, they just throw you that old Egyptian garbage. Cough.

I can tell you right now, however, that coughing is the just about the last thing you'll want to be doing when you start up this game. Everything is such a magical experience, such a beautiful rendition of the perfection that few other games can actually match. Until now, there have been many games that have pretended to be good plat-formers. Some, like DK64, manage to do their jobs and make for decently fun games. Others you'd probably be better off melting down for scrap. The point is, Super Mario 64 gained a new rival when Banjo-Kazooie came out. And you know, the world may never be the same.

Reviewer's Score: 9/10, Originally Posted: 07/26/07, Updated 08/31/07

Game Release: Banjo-Kazooie (US, 05/31/98)