Big Mountain 2000

"No matter how many times I hit my head on the wall, this game still sucks."

Alright, we've all played a snowboarding game before. And a skiing game (well, not really). But what if you could get both a snowboarding and skiing game AT ONCE? Glory hallelujah! This is the game for you! Not.

Graphics- 3/10: Good god, I'd expect better from a 64 game. They're pretty damn blocky, I'll tell you that. The trees are 2d. The characters' skis look like they're made out of paper. I could have done better.

Gameplay- 0/10: Heh heh, yeah, really. There are 4 different courses in the entire game. 4. There's 3 different things you can do on these courses: Free ride, Grand Slalom, and Slalom. Don't even bother with the last 2. The gates are so hard to get to, you'll be slamming down the controller before 5 seconds is up. When you boot up the game, you'll see a big giant ''Big Mountain 2000'' logo, and then 3 different things you can do: Single Player, Multiplayer, and Options. Wow. I've seen better in NES games. Your goal in Single Player is to rack up ''Cool'' points and win the same race over and over and over and over again. You can get those by pushing B over and over to do a trick, which you can never actually land. Hoorah.

Story- Er... it's a racing game. It's not meant to have a story. I won't even mark it.

Audio- 1/10: If you ever actually BUY this game, whatever you do, don't turn on your TV's sound, unless you want to hear the same 2 tracks over and over. That's the entire audio score, except for a guy going ''Ah!'' in a freaking high voice when he bangs into a tree, and a girl doing the same thing with a deeper voice. Methinks they must have screwed up with the voices or something (hopefully).

Replayability- 2/10: For some reason my little sister is obsessed with starting a multiplayer game against an invisible guy just to show me that she can win a race. I watched her lose one time. I laughed. I cried. I smashed the cartridge. Once you're done getting your character to ''Snow Speeder'', you're pretty much done with this game folks. Bah.

Buy or Rent?- I don't even think I need to answer that.

Should I get this game?- Only if you need a way to clear your house of relatives.

Well, that's it for my first ever review. Now you go have fun with Big Mountain 2000. I'll just go and die in a corner now.

Reviewer's Score: 2/10, Originally Posted: 03/23/02, Updated 03/23/02