"Kiddy Game, Huh? Well, Either That's Wrong Or I Must Suck."

I rarely ever regret buying the things I buy. When I bought that music CD, my brother complained and complained and said I wouldn't like it. Well, sure it's not my most FAVORITE CD but I still listen to it and I like it. When I got Simpsons Wrestling, my brother said it sucked but I played it and I beat it and I kinda liked it. No regrets there. So, when I bought this game, I thought it would be good. Keep in mind I didn't even know it existed until I saw it on the shelves. I was excited when I got it. I thought it would be like Spyro, one of my most favorite games. However, when I played it, I soon found out that this game was nothing like Spyro...in fact, it wasn't even good. So, does that mean I regret buying this? Yup, I sure do.

Story - 3/10: You are Zapper and your little brother gets kidnapped by a magpie (a bird, for all of you who doesn't know what a magpie is). Now, you are out to rescue him! Seems like the same old ''rescue-the-kidnapped-princess'' story you get in a lot of RPG's but replacing the princess with a little maggot. Nothing unique here.

Graphics - 6/10: They're actually not that bad. I don't mind the kiddy-ness of the graphics. I mean, Spyro is no hardcore, bloody, teen graphics, either. But I'm not trying to compare this game with Spyro. ANYWAY, everything looks simple and nice. You rarely, however, get a close up look of all the stuff. But that's not a HUGE problem. I think, though, that there could've been more variety and stuff. Not perfect graphics, but nice nonetheless.

Audio (Music/SFX) - 5/10: Maybe I'm deaf or something but I couldn't notice that much music. I mean, i know it's there but I can't hear it or anything. The music is nothing that'll get you to sing to it. But it's alright I suppose...well...maybe not. It's not very noticeable so I guess that counts against it, no? The SFX is pretty good. You've got the zapping sound, the jumping sound, the flutter of your wings when you hover soung, the chirping sound, etc. I've got one problem with the sound though and that's when the other crickets talk to you. Sure they have little word bubbles for you to read but they also have voices...though apparently they speak cricket language. It's just mumble, mumble, mumble. Couldn't the makers have just given them ACTUAL voices?? Sheez... I also think that Zapper's death cry gets annoying...yeah...^_^

Controls - 2/10: Personally, I don't like the controls one bit. First, to know the controls, you have to know how the game is played. Every level...let's say it's like a chess board (LIKE a chess board, not EXACTLY a chess board). You don't walk around freely. There are squares and you jump in a square motion. So, no curves or circling or anything curvey. It's all straight lines. You get what I'm trying to say here? So, yeah. You jump from square to square until you get to the end. Well, the problem with this is that turning is really complicated. You jump straight in front of you, then Zapper will be in that direction. So let's say you want to turn left but to your left is a bottomless pit. Well, if you press left, Zapper will hop left. So, to FACE left, you need to press L1 or R1. Yeah...it gets really annoying at times. I don't know how many times I've died just because of that stupid concept. But I'm here to talk about controls, not gameplay. So anyway, you can jump from square to square with the directional buttons, you can do a longer jump with more distance with the X button and you'll be using that quite a lot. Holding X will get you to hover for about 3 seconds. For me, I've never found this hovering useful...it just got me killed. Go figure. Triangle is for chirping...so far, I've found no use for that. Call it useless, if you will. Square is for zapping and Circle is for...whoops. Looks like I forgot what Circle was for. OH WELL. The point is, the controls are easy but they suck. Let's leave it at that.

Gameplay - 1/10: Now this is where the game sucks. In the first few minutes of the game, it's pretty interesting with not much wrong to it. Then you get to the third level and you'll be dying like crazy and you'll think, ''WHAT THE HELL!?!?!? This game sucks...'' So yeah. ANYWAY, as I already explained in the controls part, the concept of the levels being like a chess board sucks really bad. It's just that awful. I've died so much just because I am in a hurry (like on a falling platform or something) and don't have the time to turn and press X. Well, in that scenario, you either press X or you press the directional button...in which case you'll fall and die. Another thing wrong with this game is the enemies. There aren't that many enemies but when they're there, they are in the worst places possible. And of all the enemies I've encountered, only one of them was vulnerable to the regular zap. Every other enemy will just get shocked a little and then continue to get in your path, killing you and annoying you. Well, to kill those enemies, you need the SUPER ZAP!! To get that, you must collect a certain amount of fireflies and then find the location which will let you charge up your regular zap to a super zap. Once you've got that, you can zap farther and more powerfully than before. Thus, you can kill almost all enemies. What's wrong with this concept, though? Well, one zap per charge. So, you charge up your zap and then kill that bee with your super zap. Now there's three more bees to kill. Well, then you've got to go back to the charge ''site'' and get your zap charged again. Then you can kill the other bee. Then you go back, charge, kill, rinse, lather, and repeat. It gets tedious. Going back and forth is something you'll be doing a lot in this game.
And what's wrong with that? Well, Zapper is incredibly slow. You hold the down direction and Zapper will jump down one square and just stay there. Yup, you've got press down again to jump down another square. So, no holding directional buttons in this game. You've gotta press them repeatedly. Sure you can hold the directional buttons down later in the game (or whenever you've unlocked that ability) but that'll be so late in the game that it doesn't matter anymore!!
But did I even explain how the game plays? Well, you go through the level and collect eggs. Along the way, you should also collect the many fireflies and kill the many enemies. There's always obstacles which will annoy you to death. It's just hard to get through a level without losing lots of lives out of frustration!! Oh, you must also find secrets. Isn't that just cool? Well, the secrets are pointless and they're way too easily found. Not even worth ones time.
So, in the end, this game sucks. It's not fun at all.

Replayability - 2/10: None whatsoever. I mean, sure you can go back to a level to collect all the fireflies and get to the secret bonus round. But what's the point of those things anyway? Your shield (which you hardly get anyway) will change looks. Wow...it looks different but it's just the regular shield in every way. Plus, those bonus rounds are hard. They're just like the regular levels, with the square jumping and gaps and stuff. Those will piss you off. You'll just mess up once because you're pressured to go fast and you just forgot to turn, so you didn't press X on that gap and fell. Thus, you ended the bonus round and must go through that annoying level, collecting all the fireflies again, just to get another chance. Still, though, I suppose you can call this replayability, no?

Difficulty - 2/10: *Read Gameplay*

Multiplayer - 2/10: I'll give it credit because it has a multiplayer but they're all stupid. They're basically all the same, just with a little different concepts. You can't unlock anything to make these multiplayer games funner...they're boring and stupid. No suspense, no laughing, no shouting, no nothing.

Other: Well, it's nothing like Spyro. Let's just say that.

Rent Or Buy? None. Don't bother wasting your money. After a week of having this game in my possession, I already got rid of it and now have a better game to play. Ignore this game at all costs.

Overall - 2/10: I'm being way too nice giving it a 2 when it should have a 0 but whatever...

Reviewer's Score: 2/10, Originally Posted: 01/20/04