Vagrant Story

"One of the most frustrating experiences I’ve ever had."

It is well known that this was the third game ever to obtain a perfect rating (40/40, together with Zelda 64 and Soul Calibur for the Dreamcast) from Famitsu, the world’s most respected video game publication, as well as the toughest rating games, so I don’t know how much did Square paid them to rate this one, but sure was a nice amount.

Plot 10/10:
Superb, a very intricate and complex tale of betrayal and conspiracies filled with twists and turns. The story involves Ashley Riot an agent of a secret group called Riskbreakers, a mysterious cult group called Mullencamp, and a cursed city called Lea Monde just to mention a few things. One of the best plots to date definitely.

Graphics 10/10:
I think VS has the best 3D graphics ever seen in the PlayStation (even if the characters designs are bit, lets say “weird”), yet is better known that morons think graphics are what make video games good, so this is merely an aesthetic feature. The very few Cg’s are amazing too.
As I said before the characters are a very odd look, they move and wear like drag queens, and, does the main characters shows his butt all the time with those clothes?, I guess I’ll never find out.

Music 7/10:
The music is something hard to rate, most of the time there isn’t music, but when there is, man, it is GREAT. The short opening theme, the boss themes... they rule, so sad there are very few of them.

Gameplay 2/10:
AWFUL. This game is one of the most frustrating, boring and tedious game I've ever played.

I think there are two main reasons why this is the worst Square game to date, first of all we have the combat system. I like it, I like the combat system, having to choose the body parts to attacks and such is nice, what it is NOT nice is having to spend hours trying to kill each enemy, it is something I just can tolerate. I know that they are weak against certain weapons, but having to change your equipment every minute, and having to improve it in those boring workshops, and having to make so many combos is unbearable, specially during the bosses, man the bosses, they are very impressive and everything, but trying to figure which one is that damned weapon that works well in the middle of the battle and then having to spend hours making combos, doing 1,2,3,4 damage points is excruciating, and then, suddenly, after two hours doing combos and doing five damage points per combo, when you are sweating and muttering “yes, just a few more minutes and he will perish, and I will be able to lie in my bed and die in peace”, as I was saying, he suddenly kills you, man, you just can’t imagine how many times I tried to threw the game trough the window, how many times I ended up shouting and crying desperately, how many times my mother wanted to get me out of the house, you just can’t imagine.

The second reason is the game’s structure, not at the very beginning, but soon the game gets horribly tedious. Ten minutes playing and then you’ll find a boss, if you are patient enough to get rid of him, in another ten minutes you will find another one, and then another one in another ten minutes, and so on. This is INTOLERABLE, from boss to boss all the time, and what if you have kill two of then without saving?, I don’t even want to remember that.

This game can be considered as a dungeon crawler but without the rpg elements we usually find in these kind of games (and I’m only talking about Japanese dungeon crawlers), I hate dungeon crawlers, but this is not the reason I dislike this game so much. In any case the dungeons, aside from being insanely beautiful (I mean, they stink, full of graves and rotten zombies, but their design is superb after you get bored of seeing all the time the same environments), get boring. What I mean is that they all look the same, and 90 percent of the game takes place in these dirty dungeons, only a few times are you going to see the day light.

The bosses are very cool, huge and impressive, but they also get very repetitive, how many dragons are there?, how many of those damned flying mages?, I hate these bosses.

However, your absolute worst, the ultimate enemy in this game is going to be the “risk bar”, undoubtedly and undeniably. Every time you hit an enemy this bar goes up, when it reaches the top, your weapons will do basically zero damage, and guess what, this bar goes up faster than James Bond gets laid with a chick. What can I do to keep it low are you wondering?, well, there are two possibilities, waiting patiently or using items, items that cannot be purchased by the way (there aren’t any shop in Lea Monde it seems), so better have a lot patience.

Replay Value:
Ha ha!, are you kidding?, I would never, by any means, replay this game, I prefer to be shot with depleted uranium gun rather than playing this damned game again.
If you are masochist then there is some replay value, there are some locked doors whose keys are only obtained later in the game, so you can come back and see what was inside, at your own “risk” of course.

To sum up:
How is it possible to mess up something with so much potential is the big question, how is it possible to make such an annoying game with those unbelievable graphics, that amazing (yet scarce) soundtrack, and most important, with that magnificent plot?, Square has the answer: with one of the worst gameplays ever.

Honestly, Vagrant Story may excel in terms of plot, graphics and sound, but the most important part of any video game, above everything, is the gameplay, games with bad graphics and sound, and even with a bad or a non-existent plot can be, at last, fun, but not this time, this game stinks, it stinks so much that it is worst than a movie starring Pauly Shore and Leslie Nielsen together, can you imagine?, it gives me the creeps, I’ll pray for this being first and the last Vagrant Story, I think with the SaGa series is enough rubbish from Square.
Anyway, I solidly recommend you this game, since I’m one of the few people that disliked it, I never bash games without any reason, for me this game is infamous, so it is up to you.

””My lack of vocabulary and grammatical errors (if there’s any) are because I’m not from an English speaking country, sorry.””

Reviewer's Score: 3/10, Originally Posted: 10/02/03, Updated 10/20/03