NBA Showdown

"Are you a 3-Toed Sloth that collects Stamps of Bea Arthur? If so, This game is for you!"

Sports games, how you delight so many. With your rosters full of every player on the team, stats, and fun playing ability that makes many people happy. I, however, am not one of them. This was my first sports games (not counting pro wrestling) and I was not pleased. Not pleased at all. This game should be shoved into a food processor. Then the food processor should be turned on to puree. Evil is this game! Be gone with yee, Satan spawn! Some few good points include: MJ on Bulls. Nets in Playoffs. You know how the athletes did that season, which is great, if you don’t have a sports almanac. That’s about it. Don’t tell me that it’s an old game on the SNES, they could of done better in 93, with games like DKC just around the corner. EA games should be ashamed. This could have been made on the Nes, if you get rid of some color. No questions asked. If I wanted useless drivel, I would of preferred to have it in small portions of many games, not one huge mass. The graphics, control, fun, sound, even the teams themselves have been shoved down the videogame toilet. Without any antibacterial wipes.

When playing this game, you have a few modes. Playoff, which I found the most enjoyable, was not a fun experience, because you could beat the playoffs with the Supersonics with their backup team while you face Jordan and Pippen and cream them like corn. There was regular season mode, which went threw all the games of a standard NBA season, but was disappointing. In fact that you could not try anything different any time you play. Then there is arcade, which is just one play, and 2 players, which is just bringing a friend along for the punishment. That is about it. Seems standard, even if all these modes are weak in themselves.

Graphics: 3
This is the best part of the game. Vivid color sticks out, though it gets repetitive and dull soon. All of the teams have their own uniforms, but get this, the uniforms have no names on them. So, unless you have your old team memorized, you will not know whom you are passing to. Mostly because the people don’t have the same skin color as they do in real life, a real big no-no for EA. Face it, which makes or breaks a sports game, Dukes of Hazards style, with many, many uproars of political correctness. Seeing that you really couldn’t make the graphics any lower, they some how made a wonderful title screen. I liked it. Tells you all the programmers’ names. So you can put them on your hit list.

Gameplay: 1
Though some people might bring this up a bit because it is basketball, I would not, just because of how bad you play the game. You move terribly slow, and the only way to beat the game the playoffs in less than 5 hours is if you save (which, on my cart, would delete in about one week) or play the quarters on 2 minutes. It’s absurd. Just because you like basketball, and want a cheap game, doesn’t mean you just dive into horror, like me. Take it from, me, you will not like to basketball over again, if you play this game. It makes it feel tedious. For one thing, the computer rarely ever fouls, and you foul out half your team trying to get close to your opponent. Every time you want to get away from him, you somehow charge or foul some other stupid way, and lose the ball. It also seems that free throws are not here, because in all the games I have played, the computer or I has never taken one free throw shot. But, what I hate with a passion is one of the most devious things in a basketball game: accuracy. Sometimes, Patrick Ewing on the Knicks will make 6 3 points from the far sides, while John Starks will miss every lay-up of the game. This is just plain aggravation here folks. Because the computer did that to me the whole series. I was the Bulls, and Jordan was missing shot after shot. If you want to play this game any more, I’m surprised.

Sound: 2
If there was any real sound than some cheers and boos, then I might have gotten this a 4. There is no in game music, no out game music, and very little sound FX to try and help me give this a better score. When you score a point on your home court, it cheers. When the computer or the 2nd player scores points away, the crowd boos. It also gets slower every time you hear one of those sounds, which could have been fixed in 1993. The only other part of the sound is squeaking the ball hitting the floor. Both of these become really annoying in about one minute of play. Why EA, your basketball games have great sound now, look what you did in 9 years. A success story for EA, a horror for your eardrum still. Turn down the sound on this baby.

Fun Factor: 1
This game is not fun to play; you kinda wish that you didn’t get this for your big birthday present. Like me. I think. I am pretty sure got it then, and I was not happy at all. Temper Tantrums flared as one of the worst games I have ever played. End of story, and then I will burn this game in a large mess of plastic. I wish I could of done this earlier. By getting rid of this game, it brings the only enjoyment.

Buy or Rent?
Do not ever, under any circumstances, buy this buy at all, unless you are one serious collector, or a 3-Toed Sloth that collects Stamps of Bea Arthur. Maybe you want to burn some metal and plastic. I pity you if you buy it, and pity myself for playing it. End of story.

Graphics: 3
Gameplay: 1
Sound: 2
Fun Factor: 1

Reviewer’s Score: 1/10

Reviewer's Score: 1/10, Originally Posted: 06/25/02, Updated 06/25/02