Far Cry Vengeance

"If you're in the mood for Humor.. Fary Cry Vengeance"

You've got to checkout Far Cry. I received the game as a gift. I graciously accepted it knowing full well I just received one crappy game. I considered exchanging it but decided to give it a try. I'm a fan of those so bad they're good movies so I was hoping Far Cry would be good for some laughs... The game delivered.. It's so bad that you have to keep playing just to see how bad it can really get.

The dialog, death sounds and animations of the enemies are hysterical. One death sound in particular sounds like they're taking a crap, another one they whimper like a little girl before they start grunting.. They enemies curse but it's just so poorly delivered, the first time some guy yelled " **** " I nearly fell out of the chair laughing.

I don't think I've ever seen enemy AI as bad as it is in this game. For example, I approached an enemy and was about 10 feet away when he shouts out " I see you " then he just turns around and stands there. One enemy sees me and tries to rush me but he can't even get over a low curb, I start shooting and he stays there jumping up and down.. I wonder if the game was even play tested.

The graphics are something that have to be seen to be believed. Screen shots cannot convey how bad this game really looks, in fact early screen shots make the game look quite good, but the graphics in the final build of the game are just terrible. Take the worst of Nintendo 64 and early PS1.. mix it together and then just dump it onto the screen in a random mess of extremely poor textures and blocky pixelated solid objects, Don't even get me started on the cut-scenes..

The sky looks like it was painted by a first grader, it's just there, with crappy clouds that look smeared on with finger paints. The game cant even keep simple objects on the screen. Grass pops up about five feet in front of you as you walk.. Grass, simple green lines they can't even keep on the screen. Enemies and trees regularly disappear and reappear right in front of you. The water looks like jello or pudding someone colored with food coloring. Shadows just suddenly appear and are nothing more than black pixels. Your character's hands look like they came from a 90 year old man or a burn victim. Except for boxes there is no environmental damage. Shoot simple objects like light light bulbs or radar screens and nothing happens. I can usually forgive bad graphics but these are unbelievable for a new gen game system. Yes Wii is not a graphical power house but seriously, what the hell was Ubisoft thinking.. they must've of known how bad the game looked.

In defense of the game it controls well, aiming, moving ( except for controlling vehicles ), throwing grenades.. and the game can be somewhat fun in that so bad it's good way that I mentioned before. Now in my defense I just want to add, I love the Wii, I've had it since launch so this review is in no way a stab at the system. I haven't had as much fun with another system as I'm having with the Wii, but this game is poorly done and that's a fact.

You know the old saying " put a thousand monkeys in a room with a thousand typewriters and they'll eventually write a novel ".. I swear they recruited a thousand monkeys to make Far Cry.

If you are a fan of all things craptacular and don't mind wasting $7 or whatever a rental costs these days, or if you can borrow the game from a friend, get it and be prepared to laugh. In my opinion the laughs alone are worth the few hours you'll put into this game.

Reviewer's Score: 4/10, Originally Posted: 02/05/07