Conker: Live & Reloaded

"This is the biggest letdown of the year!"

Conker's Bad Fur Day on the N64 was one of the most controversial games ever made. It used offensive humor, a lot of poo, curse words, and some sexual references to show it was unafraid to take that route. The game-play in that one wasn't anything particularly outstanding, but it was good to see games finally going a mature route. Now, Rare has remade this game to suit the Xbox. What'd they add? Multi-player. What else? Better graphics. Anything more? No chance. Since it's a remake, you'd think they'd make everything better, but NO!

GRAPHICS: 9/10
This graphics are gorgeous. The way Conker's tail moves so realistically is just hypnotic (not in a sick way, jeez). All of the environments, characters, and actual effects (like exploding cows) were all revamped for the better. They all look outstanding on the Xbox. The only complaint is there is some slowdown during multi-player. Other than that, the graphics are outstandingly well done.

SOUND: 9/10
I'm liking where these good areas are going. The voice-acting makes this thing just so much funnier. The sound effects and general design make this game hilarious, which is what this was aiming to do. The music is nothing original or outstanding. After all, this is a remake. That's really the only bad area. Otherwise, this sound design was great for this remake.

STORY: 8/10
Half the time I keep trying to understand this story, I just keep getting confused. The script writing and cheap one-liners help convey this as a very funny game, even if I couldn't follow most of the general story.

GAME-PLAY: 3/10
Just like Charlie Brown trying to kick a football...
AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
When you remake a game, you're supposed to bring back some recognizable elements and then make all the other parts better. They did almost nothing new outside of the graphics. That's unfortunate. The controls are SO frustrating to work with, half the time you can't even shoot or hit anybody. Which brings up another area, multi-player. This is all shooting and is all stuff that's been done in Halo 2. Wrong system to try a multi-player romp with Rare. The camera angles in this game can make this game so much more difficult than it already is! And it's plenty difficult. All in all, Rare brought back too much of the old days with this.

OVERALL:
A game that has outstanding graphics, great sound, and a funny story is nothing without good game-play. Conker is the epitome of bad remakes. Who cares about good graphics and sound if you can't have fun playing the game to notice?
FINAL SCORE: 5/10

Reviewer's Score: 5/10, Originally Posted: 06/30/05