Star Ocean: The Last Hope

"A Bright Star in an Ocean that Reeks of Awesomeness."

First off let me say that this game is purfect on every level. Purfect like Meracle get it. Meoww. =^_^=. Second off playing this game is like floating on a cloud. When I feel the XBOX controller between my hands it's like a sensation no one could get any other way.

The story is about Edge a young man that any kid - child - or adult could look up to. He's brave, calm, collected and definitely anything but emo. He bashes monsters constantly with his sword WHO WAS GIVEN TO HIM BY A CREW MEMBER IT DIDN"T FALL OUT OF THE FRIEKING SKY! It's really easy to level with him if you max his criticals and fill your empty bubbles with blueness.

Second there is Reimi, who just by being the best character in the game makes the game totally NOT SEXIST. She has a bow and whats more she's friekin hott.

Other characters include Faize (the cutie) Lymle (the wittle girl) Bacchus (awesome) Meracle (meow) Myuria (bubs) Sarah (useless) and Arumat (Space Magus).

You start off on a planet chock full of bugs. As you fight you will release that you aren't playing just any RPG but the best thing ever created in the history of man. Your body will start convulsing and you will flip your lid and scream YES YES YES while playing the game. You will journey through a cave and come out the other end. Then you will make your way to a new planet with a little girl.

You will soon realize that removing YOUR FRIEKING NOSTALGIA GOGGLES makes the game significantly more enjoyable then playing it with your head stuck half way up your own ***.

After that you will go back and do more quests because the players guide says to do so. You'll then realize that you've spent about 30 hours doing every little thing in the game while everyone else just rushed to the end. It's a pretty good feeling really. I'm speaking from experience here.

Then you meat up with Bacchus which is the best part of the story because he's a scientist with a robot body. You'll just keep playing and playing as all other factors of life get blown away by the power of your 360. School, Your job, Sleeping, Food. All these things will fall by the wayside as you enter a state of eupohoria of the awesomeness that is Star Ocean 4.

Then you'll just keep blitzing your way through it. Battle after battle grinding your way towards becoming the ultimate warrior. You'll notice that the game is extremely perverted which is pretty much the best part.

Then you'll take a break from the game to go on Gamefaqs to see what everyone else thinks. You'll read over the reviews and notice that the majority of them are very well written. You will think to yourself holy crap these gamefaqs guys actually are pretty cool and most of them have intelligent well thought out opinions about the game. Then you will read this one review that's just ridiculous that this one guy wrote who didn't even play the game. You will then write your own review.

Then you go back to Star Ocean. It's usually a good idea to take breaks in between playing so you can play the PSP remakes of 1 and 2. I played so long I forgot what Aquaberries were used for (I'm not kidding). Then before long you end up on Roak.

But before that you will experience the best plot twist in the history of gaming since Star Ocean 3. I don't want to spoiler you guys so I'll keep this short. Let's just say something goes boom because your spaceship goes whoosh. Into something that's black that takes you somewhere where you weren't before. To a place that you've been to before in a dimension that's not the same as before and Edge does something stupid. He gives someone something that turns out to be a bad idea. That person uses that something that makes everything go boom. And by the time it's all over Edge is a little upset but you would be too.

I'm going to cut this short here by simply saying. If you have the money go out to the store now and buy this game. You won't be sad that you did and you will love every millisecond of the awesomeness that you will experience. No game ever before will make you feel this wondrous inside and out. You will eat sleep and breath Star Ocean and you will become a new man from playing.

I'm not going to keep this going any longer because I don't want to spoiler the game for you all. But one last thing I wanted to say before wrapping this all up.

Nya nya ! =^_^=

That is all my friends. Good bye and Good night.

Reviewer's Score: 10/10, Originally Posted: 03/05/09

Game Release: Star Ocean: The Last Hope (US, 02/23/09)