| Assassin's Creed |  Don't procrastinate, assasinate!...OK, procrastinate a little. | 12/03/07 | 7/10 |
| Batman: Arkham Asylum | *Insert epic Danny Elfman Batman theme here* | 09/04/09 | 9/10 |
| BioShock | I choose you, Rapture-chu! | 11/07/08 | 10/10 |
| BlackSite: Area 51 | It's awful, Henry. It's awful. | 01/09/08 | 2/10 |
| COD World at War | It's back to World War II! Don't forget to bring a towel. | 11/20/08 | 9/10 |
| COD4: Modern Warfare | One duty-filled call that MUST be answered! | 11/19/07 | 10/10 |
| Condemned 2: Bloodshot | Holy savage beatings, Batman! | 04/04/08 | 8/10 |
| Dead Space | In space, no one can hear you kiss your sorry ass goodbye... | 10/23/08 | 9/10 |
| DW: Gundam 2 | Update: Giant robots still don't get it, continue to require beatings | 04/30/09 | 8/10 |
| Dynasty Warriors: Gundam | Well, if you want giant robots beaten, your gonna have to do it yourself! | 09/04/07 | 7/10 |
| F.E.A.R. 2: Origin | A game that once again proves my theory: Little girls with long black hair must be KILLED!! | 02/23/09 | 8/10 |
| Fallout 3 | What do you mean there's no McDonald's??? | 01/26/09 | 9/10 |
| Far Cry 2 | The best *driving down dirt roads* simulator ever made!! Oh, and you shoot things, too. | 12/23/08 | 6/10 |
| Folklore | Warning: This game contains a badass! | 10/23/07 | 9/10 |
| God of War Collection | They say one is the lonliest number that you'll ever see...so add two and make it a threeway! Because it's God of War and...ya know... | 12/09/09 | 10/10 |
| Grand Theft Auto IV | Super damn fun happy time for the whole family! Damn hell ass damn! | 05/14/08 | 9/10 |
| Haze | *Cough, Cough*... | 05/28/08 | 7/10 |
| Heavenly Sword | Heavenly Sword will hit your weak point for MASSIVE DAMAGE...in a good way! | 09/17/07 | 8/10 |
| Killzone 2 | Death wears a Gas-Mask. | 03/11/09 | 10/10 |
| Lair | Oh Noes, it's Lair!! Women and Children first!! | 09/04/07 | 7/10 |
| Medal of Honor: Airborne | GERONIMOOOOOoooooo....... | 12/10/07 | 8/10 |
| Mercenaries 2 | My ass hurts, and it's not because of the gunshot wound | 09/08/08 | 5/10 |
| Metal Gear Solid 4 | There's no need for a witty tagline on this one | 06/19/08 | 10/10 |
| Mirror's Edge | We're living on the edge! (You can't stop the Faith from faaaaaaaalling!!) | 12/01/08 | 7/10 |
| Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2 | Go ninja, go ninja go! Go ninja, go ninja go! | 10/19/09 | 9/10 |
| Prince of Persia | Alright, I'll help you save your kingdom! Just try not to stare at my ass... | 01/05/09 | 9/10 |
| R&C:Tools of Destruction | Bust out the Groovitrons, the universe needs saving!! | 11/05/07 | 9/10 |
| Rainbow Six Vegas 2 | Meet the new game, same as the old game...but still fun, dammit! | 03/31/08 | 8/10 |
| Ratchet & Clank Booty | Butterscotch Sniker Doodles! | 08/28/08 | 8/10 |
| Ratchet & Clank Crack | The universe is still in need of saving, despite no Huey Lewis soundtrack | 11/25/09 | 9/10 |
| Resident Evil 5 | Chris Redfield only cares about two things: his freaks and his peaks. He'll be getting plenty of both here. | 03/24/09 | 9/10 |
| Resistance 2 | So much epicness, it will make you want to slap your mama! | 11/14/08 | 9/10 |
| Silent Hill: Homecoming | Home is where the heart is...and the liver, and the spleen, and the intestines... | 10/08/08 | 9/10 |
| SIREN: Blood Curse | Next time you come across a human sacrifice ritual taking place, you may want to let it go... | 08/01/08 | 9/10 |
| Soulcalibur IV | Beneath all that awesome bewb-age lies a soul that still burns! | 08/06/08 | 9/10 |
| Street Fighter IV | The fighter's dream returns. World peace soon to follow. | 02/27/09 | 9/10 |
| SW: The Force Unleashed | What did Obi-Wan tell Luke when the waiter brought him his salad? | 09/29/08 | 7/10 |
| The Orange Box | Hey you! Yeah you! Do you enjoy the video games? | 01/06/08 | 10/10 |
| Time Crisis 4 | Terrorists fear mah plastic peacemaker!! | 12/10/07 | 8/10 |
| Tomb Raider: Underworld | Can't these damn tombs raid themselves? | 12/08/08 | 7/10 |
| Turok | It's time to Turok and roll!! (Dear god, I'm so sorry for that tagline...) | 02/11/08 | 7/10 |
| Uncharted 2: Among Thieves | Oh LAWLZ, Gears of Dewd Raider got a sequel to Tombs of War! lololo- *gets crushed by exploding train car* | 10/21/09 | 10/10 |
| Uncharted Drakes Fortune | LAWLZ, its Gears Of Dude Raider! lololo-*gets dropkicked in the face* | 11/27/07 | 9/10 |
| Unreal Tournament 3 | Big, muscular, steroid-induced freaks frag you. What more could you ask for? | 12/29/07 | 8/10 |
| Warhawk | I didn't start this war, but it's on! | 09/10/07 | 8/10 |
