Ok, it seems like a basic assault rifle/machine gun/whatever, I'm no gun expert. Anyway, the reason the Lancer gets a place on this list is because it has a Chainsaw attached to it. A CHAINSAW! How awesome is that! An actual gun that can be useful in melee combat range, with the Bayonet being the only other gun I know of. Someone trying to knife you? CHAINSAW TIME!
Ok it's not exactly the most useful weapon in real life, but if we thought like that all the time, would we even have this list? Anyway, the Lancer is a fun, and ridiculous weapon.
Although there are a lot of Joke weapons in Soul Calibur, this one is probably my favourite. Why? Well, I'm a big Zelda fan, playing the NES games as a kid, and some Game Boy game as well. Anyway, when I found out Link was in the GC version of Soul Calibur 2, I was happy. As most people did, I used him as my main character. And I was waiting for his Joke Weapon, and saw that it was a Bug Catching Net, I chuckled. It's awesome because Link, the Hero of... everything, is running around beating up the likes of Mitsurugi, Nightmare and INFERNO with a Bug Net. How awesome is that?
Yes, a Teddy Bear. This is actually a hidden weapon in the game, so not everyone will have found it. This weapon actually does poor damage, but it's side effect is what makes it awesome. For each hit you deal to an enemy with this weapon, you heal a small amount of health. I mean come on! You're killing these demon-things (or whatever they are) with a Teddy Bear, but you're also keeping yourself alive by whacking the crap out of them with a Teddy Bear!
Final Fantasy does have some weird weapons, I mean Cait Sith in VII uses a Megaphone. Quina in IX uses a Fork. You get the picture. I was thinking of including Wakka's Blitzballs I realised that a ball used in sports can still hurt someone, unlike dolls (unless they're Voodoo dolls, but these aren't Voodoo dolls). Anyway, although Lulu is mainly a magical attacker, her physical attacks are here kneeling down and sending her magical dolls to attack the enemy. Until you start stat maxing end game, these are pathetically weak attacks. But still, using a magical doll to attack an enemy? It sounds ridiculous, but when you are able to kill the strongest bosses with this it becomes awesome!
This goes for the whole series, but I used Brawl because it's the most recent one of the three.
Anyway, it's ridiculous because it's a Turtle Shell (well, to be exact it's a Koopa Shell but you get the point). It's awesome why? Becuase it can launch you so far you EXPLODE! Yes that's right, you can throw this into Donkey Kong's face to watch him explode (ok the explosions happen off screen but still THEY EXPLODE!).
If these shells are so lethal, why don't the Koopas just throw these at Mario during his adventures?
If you saw a picture of Pandora you would see a briefcase. Upon seeing said briefcase you'll probably have a WTF moment. But seeing that this is Devil May Cry, an over-the-top cheesefest series, it kinda makes sense. What this weapon does is transform into 666 forms, ok you can't use all 666 forms in-game (shame really), but you do get some ridiculous weapons such as: A Missile Platform, A Glaive, A Rocket Launcher, A Laser-Bow Thing and a Machine Gun. Also, for MASSIVE DAMAGE you can buiild up the meter on screen and then unleash the full power of Pandora by opening the briefcase (seeing that this weapon is based on Pandora's Box, opening it being the most powerful attack does make sense). It's good fun, and mad.
Whilst being based on a film franchise, I had to include this weapon in this list. It's a Chainsaw that's attached to the main hero's arm. You thought the Lancer was awesome? Well it is, but this turns things up to 11 (despite being made before Gears of War) by adding a Chainsaw to HIS ARM! You thought Barret's Machine Gun Arm was awesome in Final Fantasy VII? Well it is, BUT THIS IS BETTER!
Anyway, of course being impractical in actual combat, you got to think that this weapon was made to be over-the-top, and it does it well.
Yeah, I know it's 2 entries from the same series, but DMC does give us an even more OTT weapon then Pandora! What exactly can top that you think? Well, an Electric Guitar that has the power to operate as a Scythe and shoot Electrically Powered Bats from it is that weapon. I mean, just typing that makes it sound stupid, even pointless weapon space. But in practical use, it's an amazingly fun weapon, got good range, power and speed, not to mention it shows that Dante would fit in with a band and will probably steal the show. What's more, from what I've read, it's one of the best weapons in the game! So it gets awesome points for being a lulzy weapon, yet it actually has purpose!
Yes the Gunblade, a weapon that, on paper, sounds stupid. I mean come on? A Sword that has a Gunhandle and Trigger for its handle? Did Square expect us to buy something that absurd? Well, people did, myself included. Sounds ridiculous on paper, looks basic and awesome in design. So it's pretty much a mix here, but still, just reading that the weapon the main character uses is a SWORD WITH A GUNHANDLE AND TRIGGER FOR ITS HANDLE makes you want to facepalm, but it might also make you want to see how the smeg they pull it off.
Final Fantasy XIII also has Lightning uses a Gunblade, but the Gunblade on FFXIII is a sword that can turn into a gun, not both at the same time, so Light's Gunblade loses a few points, despite being awesome.
Ok, we've heard of having nunchuks in video games... but GUN-chuks? I'm being serious, gunchuks, you know, nunchuks, but with guns. It sounds stupid, but it's actually a ton of fun. I mean, waving two handguns around like nunchuks and shooting bullets, not to mention the WA TA TA TA TA TA noise Bayonetta makes sometimes using these, how can you not think these are awesome? Who wouldn't want to use that in an enviroment where video game logic applies? Ok, in reality these things are impractical, you know, you could end up shooting yourself as you wave them about. But in a video game, they work, especially in a game as over-the-top as Bayonetta.
I wanted to include Odette (Ice Skates) in this list as well, but I didn't want it to have 2 entries from the same game. 2 from the same series? Sure. But 2 from the same game is a bit overkill IMO.
In fact, I can only see very few video games using weapons like these, Devil May Cry comes to mind, and maybe other humorous games such as God Hand. Heck even a Final Fantasy game could get away with such a ridiculous weapon.
I admit, I haven't played as many games as others on this site, but to me, this is the most ridiculous weapon in video gaming, and it's awesome for the very same reason it's ridiculous.
So there you have it, my 10 favourite ridiculous, yet awesome video game weapons. There are probably more weapons out there, but I haven't played the game. I might re-do this list when I've played more games, but for now, here you go.
List by Eurashal (07/28/2010)
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