Review by durango

"Respect is Everything: A paradox within itself."

The Grand Theft Auto series has been around since the days of the Playstation. It didn't really jump start into being a huge franchise until its 3D debut on the PS2, Grand Theft Auto III, the ultimate casual gamer bait. But even before GTA3, Rockstar's GTA series was a rather big hit, as they were very popular, known for non-linear gameplay where you just run around, and blast the living crap out of people with various guns, run over them, and causing havoc all over the town as you try to run away from the cops, SWAT Team, Special Agents, and even the MPs if you tick them off enough. Grand Theft Auto 2 for Playstation is basically an overhead Grand Theft Auto III, if you will, aside from a few additions here and there. But this? This isn't even an excuse.

Grand Theft Auto 2 on Playstation would have different things around. Buildings, pools, lakes, roads, etc. Well, what's the difference between a body of water and a building in this game? Hard to tell, isn't it? Yeah. No blood? C'mon. Machine Gun is 4 shots at once. What's wrong? Can't let us hold the button and launch a shot quickly? And why does the Flamethrower look like red paint spray, now? It's sad. Your character's movements are very basic, as you run around the colorful town. Colorful with building tops and pools of water that look like building roofs, and people and stuff.

This game doesn't sound very cool, either. Machine Gun makes a, "Chish!" sound, instead of a bunch of bullet shots. Flamethrower looks just as it sounds: Paint spray. There is no excuse. There are games like the Zelda games on GBC that show that this is a total disgrace. Bumping a car doesn't make any noise.

Y'know, it's funny how this game's subtitle is "Respect is Everything", yet Rockstar shows absolutely no respect for their most popular series with a terrible port like this, which was practically rushed. What? No Molotov Cocktails? No Grenades? Oh wait, that's right! You get them by Gameshark, but when you do try to use them, it's apparent you can't, since chances are, they were taken out. This game is so horribly glitched, too. If you even make a wrong diagonal turn into a building or another car, and it gets stuck, and you try to get out, you're pretty much skewed, and you can't get out. Or what if you're running around, and the game freezes all of a sudden? And just how do you expect to get back? Oh, that's right! The incredibly long and boring password system! Yes, two lines long, with about 20 or so characters for each line! Write down everything, as you accomplish your missions. Some of your missions are even completely cut down from the PSX version. In fact, probably the biggest turn off I experienced was in one of the last missions, I got it...a TANK! Yes, the only Tank in the game! Yeah, now maybe I can run over cars and blast everything! Big mistake. Your only tank in the game is nothing more than an incredibly slow, giant walking tank of sheer stupidity and laziness. And it's only one of the other worse things. Did you know you can't even JUMP in this game!? Yeah. They really cut this game down like a "yo momma" joke fest. -_-;

It's not even worth replaying, since the password system is so incredibly crappy and long, especially since you'll want to write down the password every time you finish a mission.

Overall, it's a horrible port from the PSX version, a very awesome game. It's not worth your time thinking you'll get something out of a portable PSX hit. Chances are, there's a lot better in Grand Theft Auto Advance for GBA, out recently.


Reviewer's Score: 2/10 | Originally Posted: 04/07/05


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