"Worst Genesis Game Ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Aww.......the SEGA Genesis, one of my favorite game systems of all time. Some of my best memories as a gamer came from this little black box of joy. It was home to some of the best games ever made even today perhaps. Of course, as with every system, not every game can be great or memorable. Recently I came across a game called Warpspeed. Sounds cool enough right. Besides a good space shooter is always nice every once in a while. Boy was I in for a surprise.

Graphics- 3/10: Well, I guess you can pretty much tell what everything is supposed to be. Unfortunately though that's the only good thing about the graphics in this game. I know that the ole genny wasn't capable of displaying as many colors as the SNES but come on!! I'm convinced that they could've just as well have put this on the Master System without any loss in detail or clarity whatsoever. Maybe even the NES...maybe. First of all let's talk about enemy ships. I suppose the ship designs are ok but they're only drawn with like 3 colors each. Why??? Secondly, the game just looks boring. I know that space is pretty empty and that there's a lot of...well space between everything but they didn't even try. All yoo see is stars and asteroids. Why is there an asteroid belt in EVERY sector and why do they disappear when enemies appear only to reappear after you've won? Why are there NO PLANETS anywhere. No nothing. Man where's my copy of StarFox at???

Sound- 2/10: I guess I can say that this game does contain audio of some sort. I'm giving it 1 point for actually having sound effects and another for actually having music. Sure your guns make a sound and there's a sound for hitting targets and one for explosions. There's even a sound for entering a black hole/warpgate/whatever that thing is. You will immediately forget the sound effects as soon as you finish playing though. Now for the music. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. What is this I'm listening too, Coco Cobana or something? This music might work in a cutesy platform game but definitely not in a space shooter. It's bad so it would still suck in a platformer but upbeat tunes do at least work there. Why does a space game have happy, cheery, chessy Carribean/beach styled themes-wierd. Who was in charge of that?

Playability-1/10: Well the controller obviously has an effect on what's happening on-screen, I can say that much. It's choppy and just doesn't feel right but then again neither does anything about this game. The main thing is just that there's nothing interesting or challenging to do with the controller as you don't truly play this game. Also why does my space-fighter not have any missles or lock on capability or an actual radar. You're given the appearance of having an HUD but nothing matters. You have a spedometer that will read something like 40,000 or 35,000 or whatever. Thing is I've never noticed my speed change during a mission nor does there seem to be any button to even control thrust in the first place. Why is that meter even there then???? There's some funny little green bar to the right of the dispay-no clue what that does either. Coordinates are also displayed but I dont' know why I should care about that either because it also does not matter. Also the enemies are pathetic. They seem to fire like once a minute if at all. What kind of pathetic weapon takes an entire minute to cool off after firing just one round???? Warpspeed seems to know, I don't. Also from time to time you'll get radio calls from aliens asking you to challenge them or one of the space stations asking you to come and protect them from attack. This seems cool but the time limit (which is not displayed ANYWHERE) for these missions is oftentimes impossible to adhere too. Once a base called me asking for help so I stopped what I was doing and headed straight there. Then they call and say it's too late and that the base has been destoyed. How was I supposed to get there in time????? Why did you wait 'til you were already dying to call me, I'm halfway across the galaxy????

Replayability-0/10: Replay????? You won't even ever work up the nerve to finish this game in the first place. I can't even tell you how or if it even ends. I forced myself to play it for at least an hour. Go play with a stick outside instead, it's much more fun, even if you're well into your adult years.

Rent or Buy: I have a better suggestion: Track down the developer and give him a piece or your mind. This is the WORST GENESIS GAME EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reviewer's Score: 1/10, Originally Posted: 08/22/06