We don't know about you, but the art of pleasingly and pleasurably scratching oneself is something to be savored. Celebrated. We at Conduits, along with some dear friends here in New York City, thought ahead for you, and even recorded some strange sounds one late night, all with one purpose in mind: telling the world that iScratch Myself, loudly and proudly.

Here's how it works:

* Use our bundled photos (no really, be our guest, help yourself, make yourself at home), a camera image (because aren't we all budding photographers?), or any from your device's private photo library.

* Clear the pop-up targets by scratching them away to earn points and achievements.

* Sound effects include male, female, cat and dog sounds. (You are welcome. We love to bring the "lolz" and "lulz".)

* Two gameplay modes: Beginner (when you want to slow your roll and just chill out) and Expert (when you really have an itch, but want a challenge).

* Scratching tools: because you really do use a fork, an ear swab, a pencil, a spatula and a toothbrush sometimes, right?

* Tell the world that you love to scratch yourself via Twitter and Facebook integration, because you are a master of your domain and a member of Generation Overshare. (Why not tell people you just spent eight minutes scratching your... arm?)

* Leaderboard, Award/achievements list: because we are all braggarts, megalomaniacs and narcissists who need instant gratification, cookies and ponies, and not necessarily in that order.

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