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    FAQ/Walkthrough by Jon_

    Version: 0.9 | Updated: 08/25/01 | Printable Version | Search This Guide

    C  O  N  K  E  R  '  S
    
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         Conker's Bad Fur Day for Nintendo 64
               Walkthrough Version 0.9
         Made by Jon (sportdog74@hotmail.com)
    
    ********************************************************************************
    
    Introduction:
    
    If you're reading this, then you're not only reading a detailed Conker's Bad
    Fur
    Day walkthrough, but you're also reading my first guide for GameFAQs. This
    guide is purely for a walkthrough of BFD; there's no items, story,
    characters, or anything like that, only a walkthrough. I hope to help you beat
    the coolest game for the N64, because I know it sure gave me trouble (and
    laughs!).
    
    ********************************************************************************
    
    Table of Contents:
    
    I. Walkthrough updates
    II. Legal statement
    III. Walkthrough
                -Hung over
                -Windy
                -Barn Boys
                -Bat's Tower
                -Sloprano
                -Uga Buga
                -Spooky
                -It's War!
                -The Heist
    IV. Credits
    
    ********************************************************************************
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    
    I.            W  A  L  K  T  H  R  O  U  G  H    U  P  D  A  T  E  S
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    August 25th 2001 - Version 0.9
    The Heist added. Walkthrough complete!
    
    August 23rd 2001 - Version 0.8
    Uga Buga and Spooky have been completed. It's War! is half done.
    
    August 21st 2001 - Version 0.7
    Added other half of Bat's Tower and Sloprano.
    
    August 20th 2001 - Version 0.6
    Half of Bat's Tower added. Edited legal statement.
    
    August 19th 2001 - Version 0.5
    Added second half of Barn Boys and touched up ASCII on top.
    
    August 17th 2001 - Version 0.4
    Added ASCII on top. Also a legal statement added.
    
    August 14th 2001 - Version 0.3
    Fixed an error in "Gargoyle", added half of Barn Boys.
    
    August 6th 2001 - Version 0.2
    Added Windy and this "walkthrough updates" section. Spell-checked all work so
    far.
    
    August 1st 2001 - Version 0.1
    The walkthrough was started. No sections besides Hung Over done yet. More soon.
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    
    II.                    L  E  G  A  L    S  T  A  T  M  E  N  T
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    Hate to do this, but I'm afraid it's gotta go somewhere. This walkthrough is
    copyright 2001 by the author. It may not be reproduced nor retransmitted in any
    way without prior permission from the author. Violations of the above terms can
    and will result in a lawsuit.
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    
    III.                      W  A  L  K  T  H  R  O  U  G  H
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    Here it is, the main part of this whole thing. I tried to include as many
    common
    problems faced as I could, so please read carefully before e-mailing me.
    
    
    *******************************************************************************
    Chapter 1: HUNGOVER
    *******************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    SCARDEY BIRDY
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Well, after a lengthy intro you get to control the dazed Conker. Walk around
    the
    fence to the other side of where you started. On the other side is an opening
    into the area inside the fence. Step in front of the asleep scarecrow.
    
    After Birdy introduces himself and steps aside for you, walk around him and
    onto
    the pad with a "B" on it. Birdy will explain to you about these Context
    Sensitive buttons. When you get control again, press B. Birdy then will drink
    the beer and open the gate to where you started. Walk out of the crop field and
    onto the other Context Sensitive pad and press B. Conker will have some Alka-
    Seltzer, and feel much better. Finally, you get normal controls.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    PAN HANDLED
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Okay, time for some action. Dive into the water and swim towards the waterfall,
    then jump onto the island. Conker will now recall how to high-jump and hover.
    Do just that onto the tree stump sticking out and make your way up. Take your
    time, you have unlimited time to do this. Ignore the door for now. Once you're
    at the top, step onto the bridge and in front of the gargoyle.
    
    This guy doesn't plan on moving for a while, but not to worry. Behind you is a
    switch. Step under it and high jump to get Conker to pull it down. Remember
    that
    door? It's now open. Make your way back down and go into the newly-opened
    door.
    
    Once inside, take a few swings at the scared-silly key. After a while, Conker
    will remember his trusty frying pan is with him for a situation like this one.
    Chase after the key and smack it when you're in striking range. Pick it up to
    open the door again, and head back up to the comfy gargoyle.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    GARGOYLE
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Step up to the lazy stone creature and take a swing. The gargoyle apparently
    has
    something with frying pans, and laughs so hard at your "pathetic" frying pan
    that he falls off. Though the cave is right in front of you, that's not all.
    
    Of course, the Gargoyle landed so hard that he caused a rock avalanche... with
    one of the rocks blocking off the path out of here. Well, Conker still has a
    few tricks up his sleeve.
    
    Step up to the giant boulder and high jump, then hover on top of it. Once your
    on top of it, look to the right of the boulder. Sticking out of the wall is
    a little platform with a Context Sensitive Button. High jump and hover towards
    it, then press B on the C.S button.
    
    "A plunger... with dynamite." Yep, you know what's about to happen. KA-BOOM!
    That little obstacle goes flying. Go through the path surrounded by flowers,
    and, awesome! You've just finished the first chapter.
    
    ********************************************************************************
    Chapter 2: WINDY
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=
    MRS BEE
    =-=-=-=
    
    Welcome to the over world chapter of Bad Fur Day! Most of these things can't be
    done until other chapters are done, so this chapter might be a tad confusing.
    
    Alright, walk down the strange narrow hill, grabbing chocolate along the way.
    Now you should be at full chocolate (6, to be exact). In front of you at the
    bottom is a sign that says Naughty/Nice. Head along the Nice path to find a
    crying Queen Bee. Step up to her red platform. After she explains her
    "dilemma",
    head back to the sign, this time taking the Nasty path. Okay, get ready for
    your
    first challenge of the game!
    
    Walk along the path, and take notice of the dirt mound. Avoid it at all costs
    when running back with the hive, or else you're stung! Keep going past the barb
    wire until you reach the end of the path, where the hive is sitting. Step up to
    it, and grab it. After seeing the bees come out, start running back where you
    came from! Never stop, no matter what. Avoid that dirt mound again, and just
    run
    back to the Queen Bee. Once you reach the bee Conker'll throw the hive back
    onto
    the red platform, at which point the Queen Bee will go into it and shoot the
    tar
    outta the "Nasty" bees. As long as you just keep running and avoid that dirt
    mound, you'll be alright. Now, of course, for your prize! Cash! Wahoo! You get
    your first $100 of the game. Yeh, cash prizes! Okay, now walk along the bridge
    and onto the stone B pad. Hey, look, Birdy again!
    
    He'll offer you a manual for $10, and you have 10 times that amount. You love
    manual long time, so you better pay up! After Birdy walk away, the cash'll
    decide he liked it better in Conker's pocket, and run back to you. Now that's
    loyalty! Now then, press B. Learn the catapult, and start using it! These dung
    beetles take two hits, so work one at a time. After hitting it, wait for a good
    opportunity to fire again. After taking out 4 dung beetles, a path will open
    up.
    Goody! Walk up to the two paths, and take the non-pooey one to go onto Barn
    Boys. The other you won't be doing before Barn Boys is done! Come back to this
    chapter after finishing Barn Boys.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    POO CABIN
    =-=-=-=-=
    (Done after Barn Boys chapter)
    
    Okay, now that you've completed Barn Boys, head down the pooey path. There'll
    be
    a small cabin in front of you, which is where you need to go! After speaking
    with the dung beetle, walk over to the trap door and become Anvil Conker by
    pressing B. Once your inside, it's gas mask time again!
    
    Walk down the poo path and you'll be in a room full of ropes. Jump onto the one
    in front of you, and climb to get to the one next to it.  Climb about halfway
    up, and jump and hover across the room. Grab onto the rope all the way to the
    right, and make your way left. Watch out for water-- err, poofalls. Once your
    all the way left, you're gonna need to make a tricky jump into a cave where poo
    is coming out of. Once you're inside, walk along the path and when you reach
    the
    fork, take the left path out into a barnyard. Now that wasn't so bad, was it?
    
    =-=-=-=
    PRUNED
    =-=-=-=
    
    Once you enter you'll meet a bull that dislike red... and you. Swim along the
    poo counter-clockwise until you reach the wooden platform. Behind it is a NES
    DK
    style thing where you jump over balls of poo. NES DK and poo. Does it get
    better?
    
    Once at the top high-jump onto the giant handle. Spin in the direction the
    arrow
    points to get Prune Juice to fall. Jump back down, and let the games begin!
    
    Run in front of the target that's sticking out to make the bull ram into it.
    Once he gets close to  you just high jump and hover over him. He'll hit the
    target, and out comes a cow! Moo! Another target will appear, except this time
    it's a wall. Do the same thing to get the bull stuck into the wall, and while
    he's struggling to get out, Jump onto his back for a wild ride!
    
    Once riding the bull try your best to line him up with the cow. Once you're
    parallel, press B to have the bull charge. Oooo, that does it! This cow needs a
    drink. After a graphic cut scene with the screaming sh-ts, get the bull to hit
    the cow again. POP, goes the co-ow! Now you've gotta do the same thing over
    with
    another cow... hit a target, get on the bull, but this time, the cow takes 2
    hits before taking a drink. Again, make the cow pop, and do it again with a
    third cow, but this one takes three hits before getting the screaming sh-ts.
    After the bulls falls in, follow him!
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    SEWAGE SUCKS
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Once inside the poo-filled place, there'll be a path. Jump out and follow it.
    Once there, you should find a Context Sensitive Button. Take those confidence
    pills! Go back to where you fell in and dive in, swimming along the path you
    came in. Grab the money for another $100! Yeh, cash. Sweet.
    
    Oh, so your adventures with poo are over? Not quite yet. Those pooballs are
    ready, and you'll be using 'em in this chapter and in Sloprano!
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    GREAT BALLS OF POO
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Alright, your own set of pooballs!..... now what? Well, first thing's first,
    take the poo ball and get used to pushing it around. I just circled the cabin a
    few times. Take your pooball and go along the path that doesn't lead you up the
    mountain or back to where the dung beetles you knocked out were. At the end
    will
    be a river... throw that pooball to stop a spiked enemy from stopping you! Dive
    down to where the enemy is and behind him will be a flusher. Jump on top of it
    and press B! Now that those spiked enemies are gone, you can head to the path
    to
    the right of the tornado, leading to the Bat's Tower chapter. Go on! On your
    bike!
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    WASPS' REVENGE
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    (Done after Uga Buga chapter)
    
    Alright, you've finished Uga Buga! Be proud, then be annoyed, cause that ugly
    Queen Bee needs you again. But at least the price is right! $400!
    
    Head back to the nasty path again... but wait! This time, you're going in! Head
    along the path inside the hive to reach the end, where you better jump in! And
    oh boy, is this annoying. Use the radar at the top of the screen to see where
    the wasps are. Basically this is a matter of skill and I can't guide you
    through
    this. All I can really say is always have the Z button down, and always be
    alert! Go for a group of wasps at a time, and try to avoid being stuck on one
    wasp zinging around while there's a whole other group advancing on you.
    
    Once they've all gone down, the Queen Bee will enter, telling you to move your
    arse. Press A to jump out, and, oh boy! You're chased by the three wasps again.
    Once more, run at all times and avoid that dirt mound. Once that's said and
    done, $400 is yours!
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    MR BARREL
    =-=-=-=-=
    (Done after Uga Buga chapter)
    
    Once you've got $2,110 in your pockets your ready to scale the mountain. Go to
    where the stone B pad is and a little behind it and to the left is the path up
    the mountain. These worms are damn annoying! Just walk very slowly and when
    they
    appear, high jump and hover over them. Once at the top, the barrel will trick
    into going on a RIDE! Yeh!
    
    Hug the wall while going down and smush those damned worms along the way.
    Right,
    Conker will wake up at night and magically have his $2,110 back. Go to the
    newly
    opened area, and enjoy the Spooky chapter... and finishing Windy!
    
    ********************************************************************************
    Chapter 3: BARN BOYS
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=
    MARVIN
    =-=-=-=
    
    Welcome to Barn Boys!.... yeah. Anyways, start out by swimming across the water
    and going right. Walk up the stairs to find Jack, a fatarse b-tch on his back,
    and Marvin, the cheese-seeking fatarse rodent. Stereotypes, ahoy! Talk to the
    aggravated Jack and he'll tell you to mention his name to Burt and
    everything'll
    be "just dandy". So, go on your bike (couldn't resist) back to the two-way path
    and head left. Wait for the right moment to go under the jumping blocks, until
    you reach another one standing still in front of a gate. It's Burt!
    
    Conker will mention Jack and he'll open the gate, allowing you to get the
    cheese
    out of the place. Whack one of them with your frying pan and pick it up, and
    head back the way you came. Never pause too long or the cheese will flee from
    your hands. Go up to Marvin, the fat cheese bastard, and he'll eat it and ask
    for more. Well, do it! Here's a tip: Walk up to those moving blocks when
    they're
    paused and about to jump over you, then walk under them. That's the easiest
    way.
    He'll ask for 3 pieces of cheese overall before exploding, and the smell so bad
    the giant block on Jack falls over. Your reward? Jack telling you there's
    something good inside the barn. What a help!
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    MAD PITCHFORK
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Alrighty, once the other block is off jump on top of Jack, and then up on the
    bigger block. High jump and hover onto the gutters and onto the rooftop where
    you'll find some chocolate, a switch, and.... money! Grab any chocolate you
    need
    and get that $$$. Then get onto the switch which will open the barn for you.
    From here on you can just jump and hover down onto the circular floor where
    there's a walking wood box, as there is a piece of chocolate right next to it.
    Go left in front of the barn and into the newly opened door.
    
    After meeting the less-then-friendly haystacks, before you know it you'll be
    chased by Franky the pitchfork. Lure him so that there's a haystack behind you
    and Franky in front of you, and when he dives at you you can jump and hover
    over
    him, making him hit the haystacks. Incase you get hit, there's chocolate to the
    left and right of the door. Once all of the haystacks are gone, the paintbrush
    and paint bucket will tell him that @$$-kicking was so lame he should kill
    himself. But, Franky the idiot tries to hang himself despite having no neck.
    Don't worry; you'll get him down... sooner or later.
    
    Alright, now that that small obstacle is over, head to the lever in the corner
    opposite of the door you came in to get the King Bee to fall out the window.
    Also it'll open the locked door for you, allowing you to follow the King Bee.
    Do
    so!
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    SUNNY DAYS
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Alright, it's time to help an old bee pollinate a large breasted sunflower.
    What? Of course it makes sense! Talk to the King Bee and then head to where the
    walking wooden box is. At the end is a path that starts out with some
    chocolate.
    Go down that path to meet Ms. Big Breasted Sunflower. After her assuming you
    want to pollinate her, walk back to the circular area where you'll meet the
    first set of ticklish bees. You'll need to find 5 groups and lead them to Ms.
    Big Breasted Sunflower. After talking to the group, lead them back to her.
    Alright, only 4 groups to go!
    
    Bee group #2: Alright, continue along the path you took to the sunflower, this
    time it will lead you into the water. Swim back to the beginning of the level,
    where you'll meet a group of bees. Lead them to her!
    
    Bee group #3: Go back to where you met Burt and high jump onto the rocks
    surrounding the cheese field. At the other end is the group of bees. You know
    what to do!
    
    Bee group #4: Remember that switch you hit to open the barn? Go up there and in
    the spot of where you got the money is the next group. You can just jump down
    again, as there is chocolate right next to you.
    
    Bee group #5: Go back to where you found bee group #4, except this time high
    jump and hover on top of the roof behind the chocolate. Up there climb a ladder
    and make your way to the giant bucket. You'll meet the final group there.
    
    Once the King Bee has finished pollinating the sunflower, go on a bounce!
    Bounce
    3 times to be able to hover into the alcove and grab another $100. Money, Mo-
    ney!
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    BARRY + CO
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Right, time to do something about Franky. Okay, go back to that circular area
    with the bouncing wooden box... it finally serves a purpose. Wait for it to
    jump
    and stand still in front of the ledge sticking out of the window, at which
    point
    you should high jump onto the box, and inside!
    
    Once inside you'll find some bats that decide to kill you. Oh joy. Anyways,
    they're pretty easily avoided, so just jump & hover from ledge to ledge, and be
    careful not to jump too far. Once at the end you'll find a C.S button, with...
    knives! Practice on those annoying bats. Once you've got the hang of it, turn
    to
    Franky. Aim for the rope, and fire. Once he's down he'll thank you and offers
    some help. So why not?
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    BUFF YOU
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Time for a battle! This guy is probably more annoying then he is hard. Get on
    top of Franky (ignore how perverted this looks) and use B to dive. Study the
    haystacks pattern and get behind him when he's still. Then, fire! After a while
    this haystack's Haybot identity will be revealed. This guy doesn't just bounce
    around, but will try to knock you off. Stay back until you find the right
    opportunity, and then step forward and attack. After three hits, this guy'll
    get
    mad SMRPG Smithy style, and knock the three of you into the ground below.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    HAYBOT WARS
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Boy, these sub-chapters are getting short! Well, this one may take a while.
    This
    part is a bit harder, but a lot of hiding is involved, so get ready. Get the
    Haybot to shoot you while you're in front of a pipe, then, dodge! The pipe will
    be broken open, and just avoid the second missile.
    
    Alright, this stupid idiot will follow you. Lure him slightly close to the pipe
    that got broken open, then hide behind it. He will dumbly walk right into
    the.... liquid... yes... anyways, he'll walk right into the liquid pouring out
    and get electrified. At this point, it's time to attack! Follow him to the
    middle, and wait for him to spin. Press A the second the red button on his back
    lines up with you, and when you see the light bulb appear over your head, push
    B! Conker will press the "Do Not push" button, knocking one of the Haybot's
    hands off. Isn't it funny how obviously placed these buttons are? Anyways.
    
    There will be chocolate behind the pipe next to the "Exit" sign, so I suggest
    you use that pipe at least once. Two more hits and this guy's finished. But
    your
    "fun" isn't quite yet!
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    FRYING TONIGHT
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Franky will ditch you as the water starts to rise. The pressure is on! Head
    over
    to the ladder behind the "Exit" pip and climb up. Use the B pad to get more
    knives! You'll have to use them to hits electric wires to avoid getting the
    water electrified as the water rises because... well you know why. There are
    three you need to hit. The first one is behind you and down, so get that once
    first. The other two are above you and to the left and right, so get those
    quickly. Once they're all down dive into the water and swim across to get to
    another ladder.
    
    Jump up and onto the next B pad. Gotta hit 3 more wires! The first one is
    behind
    you and clear across the room and is the hardest, so do that one first. Aim
    lower then you think it is and once you've knocked it down, turn up a bit.
    There's a wire to the left and to the right. Get those quickly and you're in
    the
    clear!
    
    Once all the wires are knocked off, jump into the water and let it rise to the
    top. Swim over to the exit and head out into another room, this time without
    rising water. In front of you will be a monk reading a stone. Jump onto it to
    piss him off, and once he sends you flying, hover onto the ledge above to grab
    any chocolate you need and MONEY! Yahoo! Then exit.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    SLAM DUNK
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Get ready for a (not-so) wild ride! Take the ladder up onto the ledge above and
    be prepared to do some ladder climbing. I can't really help you with the wasps
    except to take your time and be patient. Once at the top jump and hover to the
    second chocolate piece, and press B. BAM! goes Anvil Conker.
    
    After that take the ladder out of the bucket and make your way back to where
    the
    big breasted sunflower is. Now jump down into the water where there's a newly
    opened cave... with a squirrel tail AND money! Grab both and exit, cause you're
    done with Barn Boys!
    
    ********************************************************************************
    Chapter 4: BATS TOWER
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    MRS CATFISH
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    It's off to Chapter 4, full of more people desperately needing Conker's help.
    Head over to a group of catfish swimming about the end of the dock, and watch
    them trick Conker into helping them out. Once that's done, hop into the water
    and swim along the path. One of the waterfalls contains chocolate and a
    squirrel
    tail, so be sure to be on the lookout for that. Once you reach the end, you'll
    find the brute, a safe, and an underwater passageway next to both. Dive
    underwater and enter it.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    BARRY'S MATE
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Swim forward a bit and up into a room with a big cog, a little cog, and a knob
    in the middle. Walk up to the little cog and talk to his less-then-nice self.
    Of
    course, it's just another person on the list to help out. Anyways, once you
    agree to help out the split-personality cog, jump onto the platform that's been
    activated behind you. You're gonna need to scale the tower, and to do so
    requires much rope climbing and balance beam walking. In the middle of each
    balance beam is a context sensitive zone, meant to help you beat the sh*t out
    of
    those bats. Slowly make your way up, and at the top, hover to the switch across
    from you. Use the spider web to go back, and this time go atop the ceiling of
    the tower. High jump and hover from platform to platform until you reach some
    money, then jump off the side (NOT the inside, jump outside) back to the brute.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    COG'S REVENGE
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Time to help out the cog. Re-enter the underwater passageway, except this time
    head into the newly opened tunnel. Surface to find a cog running around. Knock
    it out with your frying pan, then carry it back to where the cog rests. Slip it
    on... err... "just the way he likes it", and head back to where you found the
    cog. Head into the bigger room next to it, and carefully get the other two.
    These are trickier; the best thing to do is to chase them, then trick them by
    suddenly stopping and heading the other way. You should catch both fairly
    easily. Once all three cogs are back up, jump onto the circular thing next to
    them and run clockwise. This will tighten the rope attached to the brute,
    banishing him from sea level. Once that's done, go back to all them catfish and
    lead the way to the chained down brute. Enter the safe they open.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    BLAST DOORS
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Ugh. Stubborn money. Great. Equip Conker with his trusty slingshot, and hit the
    letters when they appear to spell out "OPEN". Careful, for every three misses a
    spiked minion charges at you. Once OPEN has been spelled out, use the new
    context sensitive pad to get a hardhat, fully equipped with a flashlight, and
    swim into the new underwater path.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    CLANGS LAIR
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Right, time for my least favorite part of the game. This part won't take too
    long if you know what you're doing, but it is rather confusing and can get
    tough
    with Conker's limited air supply. Head down the long tunnel, watching out for
    alcoves on the side for more air (and to avoid the Clang), then at the bottom
    grab some air. Once you're done with that, swim through the narrow green tunnel
    up above. After reaching the other side, head up to the surface for a quick
    breath, and a headlight recharge (you'll need em to see the tunnel colors).
    Dive
    back in and swim for the blue tunnel up high. Once there, go yet again to
    surface level, and jump up to grab the lever. Go back from where you came, go
    up
    for some air and a battery recharge (better safe then sorry), and splash back
    in. Go back through the green tunnel you came in from, and grab some air. Swim
    through the yellow tunnel this time to end up at the floor of a mine shaft
    look-
    alike. Avoid the Clang, and enter the next area.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    PISSTASTIC
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Not only is Conker everyone's best bud, but he's also flammable. Once the two
    have scurried around the room and you're back in control, head to where the two
    were originally standing. Get drunk with the Context Sensitive pad, head out
    into the open, and... unzip with B! Z should aim your piss better, and it'll go
    further. Aim the trail at the Fire Imps, and get all 8. Once Conker has run out
    of... "lubricant", there's a first-aid box nearby. There's also chocolate
    around
    the room, and near the medication box. Repeat as many times as you have to,
    then
    watch what happens.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    BRASS MONKEYS
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Oh yay. Testicles of steel. Anyways, head to a corner of a room, right under a
    big 'ol switch. When the "Big Big Guy" gets near you and spits out fire, that's
    time to high jump onto the chain. A big trail of slop will fall onto the Boiler
    Boss, causing it to go crazy for a bit (NO, not at ALL like Haybot...). That's
    Your chance to knock the hell out of the Boiler Boss's nuts. Repeat four times,
    each time at a different corner, to defeat the boss. If the guy just won't come
    down to you, lure it by gets close to it, then run for a corner. There will be
    two balls left over; roll one onto the switch, and the other down the hallway
    with the spiked minions. Exit to find the catfish waiting for you.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    BULLFISHS REVENGE
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Argh, a lousy $10 for all of that?! I don't think so! While Conker argues with
    the catfish, the brute is slowly eating away at it's leash. This shouldn't be
    too tough, unless you have very low chocolate. Just swim underwater to go
    faster, and always make sure there's a catfish between you and the brute. Swim
    back to the dock to watch the cut scene, and the brute crash into the wall. Ah,
    finally, a decent reward... Jump onto the brute and high jump into the alcove
    to
    get a scorching $300! Alright, you're done with this dump. Off to Sloprano.
    
    ********************************************************************************
    Chapter 5: SLOPRANO
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    CORN OFF THE COB
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    While arguably one of the shorter chapter in the game with four sub-chapters,
    and one and a half of them being a boss battle, this chapter is no less fun.
    You
    must go back to Windy once done with Barn Boys to do this and get the pooballs.
    Once you have them, drag one up the path BEHIND the Poo Cabin, the path that
    doesn't go all the way up. At the end of the path, dump the poo ball onto the
    sleeping giant dung beetle. If you don't make it because of other dung beetles
    or falling off, go back down and try again. Once the oversized dung beetle has
    exploded, go back to where you got your first poo ball and carefully drag it
    along the other path. Once it's right in front of the big hole at the top of
    the
    mountain, high jump onto the pooball, then on top of the mountain to get some
    money. Push the pooball into the giant hole, then climb back down to the foot
    of
    the mountain, and finally enter the new hole inside.
    
    After you hear the story of the dung beetles, walk up to the piece of sweet
    corn, and do as the mysterious voice tells you to. Once the time is right, hit
    the piece of sweet corn and carry it to the little piece of land sticking out
    to
    throw it in. Careful, though, because randomly a giant hand will come out of
    the
    hole in the ground and swat at you. Continue to each area with sweet corn, each
    time with one more piece to catch, and while walking from area to area lookout
    of falling pieces of poo. At one point, you'll reach what seems to be an
    extremely difficult jump; get a running start, jump, then hover as late as
    possible. Ignore the C.S pads for now, then once you throw in the sixth piece
    of
    poo, get ready for a few laugh-out-loud moments.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    SWEET MELODY
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Once verse one has been sung, he'll start hurling poo balls at you. Avoid them
    as carefully as possible, while at the same time standing near the C.S pad.
    Load
    up on chocolate if you need to. Once he starts his long note, step onto the C.S
    pad, and throw the TP into his open mouth! Once he sings the second verse and
    your C.S pad is covered, run over to the nearest one, which is where two pieces
    of sweet corn used to reside. Again, once he starts singing, use the C.S pad to
    throw TP in his mouth. If incase you miss, he'll pop out in a different place,
    so turn quickly and throw accurately. Once he's gobbled up two more pieces,
    he'll start to sing (and Conker will have a line or two!) the third verse. Jump
    the big gap, and use the final C.S pad at the right time. He'll go quite fast
    now, so be as accurate as you possibly can, without taking too much time. After
    three final rolls, the Great Mighty Poo will sing one last high note to break
    some glass. That's your cue to finish him off.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    U-BEND BLUES
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    This piece of poo is almost finished. Cross the huge gap and make your way to
    the newly opened alcove near where you started. Careful, though, this
    persistent
    monster will still throw poo balls at you all the while. Once in the
    once-glass-
    covered alcove, grab the money and high jump onto the flusher. Witness the
    Great
    Mighty Poo do a Wicked Witch of the West parody, and head to where he once
    resided. If you'll look carefully, you'll see little ledges sticking out, and
    on
    the bottom one an opening. Enter it.
    
    Grab the squirrel tail, and hop into the water. This next part can be
    frustrating if  not done right, so do it carefully. Grab some air, and head
    into
    the opening. There are many blades spinning around, and you'll need to get by
    them. Just swim past them when the time is right, which is easier said then
    done. Stay near the sides and start swimming a bit early, as Conker is slower
    than the blades. Grab air when necessary (which is also near the sides), take
    your time, and you should do it without _too_ much trouble. At the end, grab
    some air and head up to the surface.
    
    Climb the chain rope up, and at the top is some trouble. There are little
    blades
    heading counter-clockwise. Jump off inbetween two blades, and run in the
    direction they are. If a blade catches up to you, jump and hover, then land
    inbetween two blades. Remember, even the slightest touch of them can slice you.
    Jump to the ladder when you see it, and climb up out and of the pipe.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    THE BLUFF
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    You're gonna need $1,000 for this part, and you know the time is right when a
    guard is crapping behind a rock. Convince the other one that you're an
    elephant,
    pay him the price (only to have it return to you!), and enter Uga Buga.
    
    ********************************************************************************
    Chapter 6: UGA BUGA
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    DRUNKEN GITS
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Make your way to the platform with dinosaurs stomping around the perimeter of a
    pyramid-like structure, and walk around the base of it to an opening on the
    other side. Always be sure to look around corner for dinosaurs, and in case of
    running into one, just walk into the wall of the pyramid and they should ignore
    you. Also, you can try to hover over them like with the bull. And If that
    doesn't work, just run like mad in the other direction. Once up a level, do as
    you did before and make your way to the other side of the wall. This time it's
    tougher, because right away two dinosaurs are right next to you. Once at the
    top, grab the money and high jump onto the strange stone face thing. Walk to
    the
    center of it, and use Anvil Conker three times to knock yourself down to the
    main part of the chapter.
    
    Once down, hop back up onto the stone face and use Anvil Conker one last time
    to
    open a door blocking you off from a cave you'll be needing to go through. Then,
    walk into the area outside the Rock Solid dance club where are the rocks are
    sleeping. To avoid waking them up, walk around the perimeter, and once on
    the other side where the bouncer stands, grab the big boulder and roll it back
    to where you started. Walk through the now opened cave, and roll the boulder
    into another where two Uga Bugas are standing. Three birds with one stone! Go
    down the path to enter the new area.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    SACRIFICE
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Go down either of the two paths and head under the giant dinosaur head. You
    should see two paths next to lava pools. Take the one on the right and enter
    the
    door. Careful on your way, because the lava pools like to shoot out some of
    themselves. Once on the other side, walk along the path and jump and hover over
    the Uga Bugas. Once at the fork near the beginning, take the one on the right
    to
    stand in front of a giant egg. Use the monk in front of it to hop on top of it,
    then use the C.S zone to hatch the egg. Guide your new baby dinosaur down the
    path, all the while letting it eat Uga Bugas. Careful, though, you do have to
    go
    a bit slower or else the baby dinosaur will get lost. At the end, you'll find
    the door on the other side. Enter it, and lead the dinosaur down the path
    (again, careful about the lava balls). Lead him to the area with four Uga Bugas
    worshiping the giant dinosaur, and let yours feast on them. Meanwhile, you
    should whip out your slingshot on the B pad and shoot it up and to the right
    (opposite side of giant dinosaur). This will raise the giant platform. Once the
    dinosaur finished eating all the Uga Bugas, lead it up onto the floor directly
    underneath the risen platform. Once it's up there, quickly run down and use the
    slingshot on the switch on the other side to lower the platform. This shall not
    only have a pretty messy result, but also please the big dinosaur. Once it's
    tongue rolls out, a monk will come out. Make use of it.
    
    =-=-=-=
    PHLEGM
    =-=-=-=
    
    Hop onto the monk and hover on top of the dinosaurs head. Run over the small
    bump to find a bunch of chocolate, and some money. Grab it, then run all the
    way
    to the end to find a squirrel tail. Head back up over the bump, because it's
    time to deal with the nostrils. Stand inbetween the two, and wait for right
    after green smoke finishes emerging out. Hop into one, and use the C.S zone to
    put in some pepper. Do the same for the other to get rid of all that nasty
    phlegm on the dinosaur's tongue. Run up the tongue and into its mouth. Once
    inside, you should take the easy path on the right, where all you have to do is
    hop over two gaps. Be warned, though, later on you'll have to take the hard
    way.
    Once at the end, carefully avoid the tonsil (how many does this thing have?),
    and come out of the other side to find a dead Uga Buga. Conker will grab its
    fur
    helmet thingy, then you're left to play. Head back to the path you came in
    from,
    and watch Conker being greeted.
    
    =-=-=-=
    WORSHIP
    =-=-=-=
    
    While the Uga Bugas' job is to "Falla squa-fetchy", yours is to guide them back
    to the Rock Solid dance club. These guys are actually dumber the dinosaur, so
    be
    sure to go slowly. When climbing up the hill, make sure to go against the wall
    or else one of them is bound to fall. Once there, take the first hit and the
    rest will follow. Your new friends will do all the work, so just run around and
    try to fill in their gaps. Once all the rocks are gone, talk to the bouncer and
    witness quite a funny cut scene, then finally enter the Rock Solid dance club.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    ROCK SOLID
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    This sub-chapter is, personally, one of my favorite parts of any game on the
    N64. Not only that, but it is a highly creative and challenging sub-chapter.
    The
    music is never tiring, and it's fun to just watch Conker dance and all the
    amazing light effects. After a few minutes of fun, it's time to get to work.
    Head on over to the bar where three kids are standing (you'll meet up with them
    later), then go behind the table to find a sleeping bartender. Roll him back up
    to where you entered, and onto a little switch to open up a door. Once it's
    there, head back to the bar area, except this time to the B pad on the other
    side, much like in Pisstastic. That's right, Conker is about to get drunk. Once
    he's loaded, head out into the area where the rocks are dancing. Wait until one
    of them is standing in front of the open cave, then... unload! Make sure to
    hold
    down Z for extra pressure. Never let up, or the rock will come and beat the
    sheet out of you. Once he's in the cave, he'll end up where other rocks are
    dancing. Sober up with a first aid kit on the table inbetween the entry and the
    bar. Remember, timing is important, and you can try as many times as you need.
    Go into the cave to end up above it, and next to your rock. Roll it along the
    path, and you'll soon discover there are dancers coming in and out of alcoves.
    Obviously, you should never move the rock when she's in, as the dancer will
    most
    likely knock you and the rock back down to the floor with the rest. However, on
    the second one, you have to go in front. Go quickly, because you'll need
    momentum to go up the slight hill onto the other switch. Hop down and get drunk
    again, then aim at the rocks in front of the other two. These guys are a bit
    tougher, as women dancers might get in your way. Once the last two are in, run
    into either cave to land on some money. Once you've gotten it, head out of Rock
    Solid... and into another task.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    BOMB RUN
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    After the Boss assigns you to get rid of the Uga Bugas in the area, you're left
    with a big bomb in your hands. Yippie. You've got 90 seconds to put the bomb in
    place, so you better hurry up. Run around the perimeter of the area outside the
    dance club, then weave through the Uga Bugas. Go down either hill and hop off
    near the bottom. Go into the tongue, and this time you'll have to take the left
    side once in. After going left, go right then left once more (all the while
    avoiding the tonsils), then exit the mouth area. Go around the dead Uga Buga at
    the other side, and drop the bomb. After the lava rises, hop from rock to rock
    until you reach the exit.
    
    =-=-=-=
    MUGGED
    =-=-=-=
    
    After the kids from the dance club challenge you to a race for your money,
    enter
    the cave and hop onto the board. The way to get your money back is to catch up
    to each of the kids and to knock them with a frying pan. This is much easier
    said then done, though. Press A to jump, B to swing your frying pan, and up on
    the control stick to speed up. There's no real way to walk you through this,
    but
    these tips might help you a bit:
    
    - When you reach the large circular lava hole, jump over it, unless you want to
    ram straight into it.
    - When you reach the narrow cave area, try to slow down a bit (or not, if
    you're
    feeling daring), and make sure you go to the right rather then the left.
    - The dinosaurs are very easy when only one to none of their legs are on
    screen.
    When you face all of them, slow down and navigate yourself inbetween the legs.
    - After two Uga Bugas go down, a part of the course will change paths, and you
    won't be allowed access to the finish until you get the third and final Uga
    Buga
    kid.
    
    Once all three are down, line yourself up with the ramp at the beginning, and
    jump when you reach the end to grab the money and leave the course.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    RAPTOR FOOD
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Just when you think you've ridden your way back to Windy, you can think again.
    When the cut scene ends, lead Conker in front of a big door where two other Uga
    Bugas stand. Immediately after this cut scene, run as fast as you can to the
    center of the ground to find a B pad. If Fangy catches up to you, use a series
    of high jumps and hovers to avoid him. Make sure you're facing Fangy, then
    press
    B to hypnotize him and get him in your control. When controlling Fangy, B and Z
    are do the same things, so you may use either one. I find Z to be easier. When
    pressing forward and B/Z, Fangy will leap forward and bite. When just pressing
    B/Z, Fangy will bite. A will cause him to jump. When an Uga Buga is knocked
    down, you can just run into it to grab a hold of it in your mouth. B/Z also
    eats
    an Uga Buga. There are two ways to kill the Uga Bugas: leap and bite at them
    and
    knock them off the edge, or eat them. The first one is easier when one of them
    is near the edge. After 6 defenseless Uga Bugas go down, 6 more with clubs will
    come out.
    
    These ones can knock you down, so be careful. If incase you do get knocked
    down,
    run back to the B pad to hypnotize Fangy again. When you hear the chime, press
    B, then A to get back on Fangy. When you fall, all 6 will come back, regardless
    of how many you killed before being knocked down. After you've knocked down
    that
    bunch, yet another will come out. These ones can throw their weapon, but ignore
    Conker when he said it'd be tricky. This makes it hardly any tougher. Avoid a
    lone chomp when many are nearby, however, as the spears may hit you, and steer
    clear of any Uga Bugas when chomping down one (it takes Fangy three or four
    seconds). After those go down, yet ANOTHER bunch comes out. This one consists
    of
    three club-holding Uga Bugas and three ones holding spears. Just do what you've
    done the whole time, and you'll finish this sub-chapter pronto.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    BUGA THE KNUT
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    This guy is a lot more bark then bite, especially when it comes to his...
    err...
    bone. Load up on chocolate around the edge of the ground, then charge at Buga.
    He should butt stomp the ground, causing it to lift a little and spread out.
    Jump over the small earthquake and edge closer to Buga's front. When he lifts
    his bone, wait a second or two before pressing Z (making sure you're half an
    inch away from him) and biting his crotch. While he's struggling with his loin
    cloth, run around to his back. When you see the light bulb (ting!), press B to
    take a big bite out of his big butt. The guy never really does get any harder,
    so there's not much more to type except that you should repeat twice more. If
    you get knocked off, run away and let Fangy catch up to you, THEN grab some
    chocolate. After three times, Buga's teeny willy will be revealed, Conker will
    say goodbye to Fangy, and Jugga and her jugs will have a heart-filled talk with
    Conker. Though you may not get the big babes, follow the cash down the path and
    back out to above where you met the guards. Follow the path to the end, and hop
    off to land in the pool you entered after the Great Mighty Poo. Exit that area
    and hop down where the GMP fell to end back up at Poo Cabin. Wahay, you just
    finished the second longest chapter in BFD!
    
    ********************************************************************************
    Chapter 7: SPOOKY
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    MR DEATH
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Don't be fooled by other games that lie, this chapter is TRULY spooky. With
    creepy sound effects and the beginning of night-time, this one's sure to send a
    shiver down your back. After being trapped, walk along the shoulder-high water
    and out into a small lake. Swim across it to find Gregg trying to kill some
    catfish. Once he finishes speaking to himself, continue walking along the
    wooden
    plank and hop into the water at the end. Go into the mineshaft, then grab the
    lever to open the gates to the castle. Walk back out to see you are where you
    started. Head back to Gregg for him to give you the shotgun. Remember,
    headshots! Walk into the graveyard and immediately hop atop a tombstone. Take
    out your shotgun and hold down R for a semi-first person view. Then hold down Z
    to get a nice laser target going. Let go of Z to fire. Once all the zombies in
    the area are dead (again), head along the graveyard and hop atop another
    tombstone. Continue this until twelve zombies have gone down, head on over to
    Gregg and he'll open another gate for you. Once on the other side, head up the
    trail while hopping over the zombie worms. These ones are a bit easier to
    dodge, for me anyways. Near the end there are two, so be on the lookout for
    that. Enter the mansion to start a looooong cut scene.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    COUNT BATULA
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Pray, listen up. Conker's great, great, great, great, great grandfather has
    turned you into a bat, and has given you the task of fetching villagers. Press
    A
    to take off and hold B to fly, then rotate the control stick to move around.
    Pressing Z will cause Conker to poop. Wander around through the house and poop
    on the villagers (while avoiding their spears) to knock them out briefly. They
    will turn red and your radar will go wild when one is near you. Drop and grab
    them when they're knocked out, and return them to the grinder. The best places
    are the library and the entrance room, because the graveyard area has too many
    villagers. Conker will also make a sound of excitement when some poop has hit a
    villager, so don't drop unless you hear it. Count Batula's appetite will prove
    to be too great after seven villagers and he will plummet into the grinder.
    Conker will return back to normal... but zombies will raid the house.
    Wonderful.
    
    =-=-=-=
    ZOMBIES
    =-=-=-=
    
    Make sure you have 5-6 pieces of chocolate and an extra pair of pants, because
    this is one helluva tough and scary sub-chapter. Make your way back to the
    beginning of the house (die, if you must), and hop atop the window on the side
    with the barrel. Kill the zombie that gets close to you, then proceed down the
    left side of the staircase. Remember to always take your time, and incase a
    zombie gets too close, put away your gun and run for it (or strafe backwards
    with C down). It's always best to stay in first person mode with your Z button
    held down, and to walk around with the C buttons. Make your way into the path
    to
    the left of the staircase and turn to enter the library. Careful, because there
    are three zombies there right next to each other. Dispose of them, then head up
    the ramp and around the room. Hop atop the shelves to reach the last one with a
    C.S zone. Use the feather bow to kill the bats that near you in the room.
    Unlike
    the zombies, the bats won't come back. When you're done, go back and around the
    rest of the room to enter the area above the grinder. There are no zombies
    here,
    so just make your way around the left side to reach the area above the dining
    room. Careful, as soon as you enter there are two zombies, so try to  get them
    from the safety of the grinding room. Once you're done with those two, walk
    along the narrow path and stop at the B pad. There are more bats, but this time
    you don't need to turn to get them. They all come from the same two corners in
    front of you. This time there are 3 of them, and before there were four.
    Continue along the planks to find a key at the end. This is were killing all
    the
    zombies comes in handy, because you have to backtrack to the door at the front
    of the castle. Go back the exact way you came, because if you encounter a
    zombie
    you can't pull out your gun.
    
    Now it's time to go down the path on the right side of the staircase. Pull out
    your gun and get ready, because there are three zombies in the area before the
    path with the red carpet (along with several spider webs). Once they're gone,
    go
    down the rest of the path with the red carpet and get rid of the zombie there.
    Head into the dining room after that. Here there's a zombie to get rid of right
    away so be prepared for him. Afterwards, there are three zombies to take care
    of, then one more around the table. Don't underestimate this room! Head up the
    half stairs and across the metallic path that rose when you inserted the key.
    You'll enter a graveyard-like area full of zombies, so really take your time
    here. You'll need to go around the bushes and into the center of the graveyard
    to find the key, so the more zombies you get, the better. Make your way around
    to find the first hole in the bushes. Careful, because there's a zombie right
    around it. Continue going around and find the other hole (the center of the
    graveyard). There are three zombies guarding the key, so get rid of them, grab
    the key, and head back the way you came as fast as you can. Sometimes, zombies
    will return, so just run and never stop, because they will occasionally pause.
    Returning the second key will cause a ladder to rise in the grinding room.
    
    You should have at least three pieces of chocolate left by now, or else you
    have
    to be EXTREMELY careful. Run up the big stairway and into the path on the
    right,
    the hop onto the small piece of wood sticking out. High jump and hover to the
    other piece of wood sticking out, then hop onto the platform. Climb up the
    ladder a few steps ahead and grab the three pieces of chocolate on top and to
    the left. This is the only chocolate in the house, and it doesn't return, so
    keep that in mind. After you've loaded up, hover over to the platform on the
    right of the top of the ladder and walk to the end. At the end, make sure you
    really DO high jump to get to the platform above it, then high jump again to
    open two doors. Make your way back to the front room, then go to the corner to
    the right of it, where a door now opened. Make sure to get rid of the zombie,
    too. Walk across the plank when you reach the other side of the door (you end
    up
    in the grinding room), and grab the key. Run back to the door to insert the
    third and final key into the slot. Be proud, be VERY proud... you just finished
    the scariest sub-chapter in the game.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    MR BARREL
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    What, the same name for two sub-chapters? Anyways. Run into the barrel, then
    hop
    upon it, and ride your way out of the castle. Much like in Windy, you'll have
    to
    ride over the worms and make your way to the bottom. However, don't press
    forward on the control stick, because you have no wall to press against. Once
    at
    the bottom, work your way out of the graveyard and into the water. Go up the
    waterfall you couldn't go up before to end up in... the area you started in?
    Hey! Imagine that. Grab the money and go through the cave, then look up at the
    start of the walkthrough, because I'm too lazy to repeat what to do.
    
    ********************************************************************************
    Chapter 8: IT'S WAR!
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    IT'S WAR
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Once the poorly shot video of the sergeant asking you to join the army is over,
    lead Conker down the Naughty path and stop where you see barb wire. Hop over it
    and take one last look at Windy, because you're not coming back for a while.
    Enter the door.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    POWER'S OFF
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Though your first order of business may look like removing the plane, it's
    actually to return power to the base. Hop into the water where you'll find an
    eel swimming around. There are also three semi-circles attached to the floor of
    the water that give the power. The eel is the only one with power, and since he
    likes to follow you, guide him through all three of the rings. After all three
    are powered up, the eel will die and the power will return... along with a B
    pad. Hop back out of the water and load up on chocolate. NOW it's time to clear
    the way.
    
    =-=
    TNT
    =-=
    
    Move the steel crate in front of the muddy ramp near the entrance. Then, head
    up
    the ramp and along the path to find a bathroom at the end. Knock on it with B
    to
    see a cut scene of a strange man with TNT attached to his back. He'll ask you
    to
    give him a little push, as well. Run around to his back and start pushing him
    forward and down the ramp. He should be stopped by the crate. Now you can lead
    him two ways: the left, and the right. The right is a lot easier, if you know
    what you're doing.
    
    RIGHT: If you don't see two big boxes full of explosives, you know you're going
    down the path on the right. The path seems relatively empty at first, but rest
    assured it's full of spider mines. There are eight of them in total, and
    they're
    easy to dodge if you know where they are. The first two are near the edge
    (opposite of the wall), so hug the wall to avoid them. The next two are the
    exact opposite, so once you pass the first two, head back to the outer part of
    the path. Once you pass those two, there will be one near the edge almost
    immediately after the fourth, so make a sharp turn to avoid that one. The last
    three are near each other, all positioned on opposite edges. The first is on
    edge, then the wall, then the edge again. Weave through them, then continue to
    the end of the path. Drop off your doomed purple guy there, then head back to
    the B pad. Aim at your purple TNT man (and a little bit higher), then fire.
    He'll explode along with half the plane. Go back up the ramp and knock on the
    door again to get another purple TNT man. This time, take him along the left
    path.
    
    LEFT: The left path is pretty much all about pattern and timing. Wait until one
    of the boxes with explosives is about to jump forward (he'll be on the left),
    then as soon as he jumps, start pushing forward (make sure you're on the left
    too). The boxes will be faster then you, so you should make it without too many
    problems. The second obstacle will be a rising and falling crate. Just wait
    until it falls, then start pushing against it. When it rises, you'll pass it
    before it even gets all the way up. The last two obstacles are the same as the
    first two, except slightly closer to each other, so use the same strategy to
    get
    the second man to the end of the path. Again, run back to the B pad and shoot
    the doomed guy, totally destroying the plane.
    
    Walk down the steps leading to the water, and talk to the sergeant.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    THE ASSAULT
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Witness the lengthy cut scene similar to Saving Private Ryan, then take
    control.
    Head up and right, around the fence, and duck behind the metal jack. When the
    Tediz reload, head across the open space to another metal jack. Follow the
    squirrels around the fence on the left-hand side of the beach and dodge behind
    the metal jack. Head across yet another open space and dodge behind another-
    you
    guessed it- metal jack. Once the bullets clear up, run straight ahead to a door
    and a lone squirrel. After the cut scene, press B to get equipped, then grab
    any
    chocolate you need nearby. Like in spooky, you can use R to go into first
    person
    mode... except that also gives you a small target that looks like a +. Press Z
    to fire, and A to reload (I never really do that, though). Shoot away at the
    lock on the door, then enter.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    SOLE SURVIVOR
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    After the cut scene, go into first person mode and strafe to the right (C
    buttons). Prepare for your first Tediz attack! Shoot away at them. A shot to
    the
    head will kill them instantly, though several shots to the body also gets rid
    of
    them. After about 5 Tediz go down, the door in front of you will open. Head
    down
    the path. Put away your guns, then hold down Z and move forward to crawl under
    the lasers. For the other two you can just run under the higher parts of the
    laser. Behind the last box before the turn will be a piece of chocolate. Get
    into first person mode with your gun after turning, because a Tediz will attack
    after you take a few steps forward. Grab the chocolate if you need to, then
    continue forward. After a few more steps, two Tediz will emerge behind some
    boxes. Again, chocolate will be provided. Around the corner is another Tediz.
    After taking it out, don't put away your guns yet. Take a few steps towards the
    lasers and a Tediz will hop onto a box in front of them. Take him out, THEN put
    away your guns and step in front of the group of lasers. High jump then hover,
    and wait for the right moment to go through the hole. After you get through,
    take out your guns because two or three Tediz will attack. Down the hall will
    be
    a few squares on the ceiling. When you step close to them, Tediz will pop out.
    Always be on the lookout for them because you'll be seeing many. This time, two
    will pop out. Kill them then continue down. As soon as you step near the first
    laser, a Tediz will emerge onto the box ahead. Kill it, then go under the
    higher
    parts of the laser like you did earlier. Careful, though, because right after
    them is a ceiling grate. They should pop out before you run under the second
    laser. A few steps forward will be another grate holding two Tediz. When
    they're
    dead, run forward a bit and there'll be another Tediz behind the box. Kill him,
    then grab any chocolate you may need. Head towards the elevator to watch the
    cut
    scene with a funny ending.
    
    Put away your guns and hop over the two lasers, then instantly take your guns
    out again. Take two or three steps forward, then two Tediz will attack: one
    from
    behind the box, and another from a ceiling grate. Take out both and jump over
    the last laser. Around the corner are two Tediz that should strike before you
    even turn. If you need it, grab the chocolate behind the fire barrel, then face
    the next hallway. Here there are robots with flamethrowers. When you near them,
    they'll start shooting straight ahead. They aren't that big a deal, just wait
    for them to pause and run ahead (in first person, of course). As you step
    between the first and second flamethrower robots, two Tediz will emerge. One
    will runs towards you, and the other will hop on the box. Around the corner are
    FOUR Tediz, so be careful after the fourth flamethrower. When you turn the
    corner, you'll be greeted by more lasers. Goody. Watch out for the ceiling
    grate
    in front of it, which holds a lone Tediz. Go through the laser traps (I'm sure
    you can figure it out), then step in front of another grate holding one Tediz.
    Careful, though, because the metal crate is home to two Tediz that will emerge
    only when you get close. Around the corner are three flamethrowers and some
    lasers. After the third one, make SURE you're against the left wall when
    rounding the corner, because SIX Tediz will attack. Lucky for you, they all
    come
    in a straight line, so you can shoot in pretty much the same spot the whole
    time. After that, a ceiling grate will spit out a Tediz. Continue down for
    another lone-Tediz ceiling grate in front of some tricky looking lasers.
    Dispose
    of it, then face the lasers. High jump then hover over the first two, then
    carefully walk under the remaining ones. There will also be chocolate, should
    you need it.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    CASUALTY DEPT.
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    WHEW! You're finally done with that long sub-chapter. Enter the small hospital
    room, which is a very easy one at that. Once the cut scene is over, you don't
    even have to MOVE. Just get into first person mode, and shoot the hell out of
    the Tediz doctors. They'll sneak around the tables, as well, but they'll be too
    far to really do any damage. When you get rid of the first bunch, more will
    emerge from ceiling grates, and they shouldn't be a pain at all. The last one
    is
    a giant doctor, but he won't be that tough either. Once the barrage of doctors
    is done, head over to the other side of the room to find a squirrel. He'll ask
    you to pull a switch to set him free, but regardless of which one you pull,
    he'll be fried. Once he fries, pull the other one to open the door... and enter
    a VERY annoying room.
    
    Okay, dodge in front of the stack of boxes, and run from stack to stack when he
    reloads. When you reach the last one,  wait for him to reload, then run across
    the room and behind him, then stand behind a metal pipe. Wait for a few seconds
    before he reloads, then jump onto the rope. Climb as very little as you
    possibly
    can, then jump up. Dodge behind the metal pipe, and wait for him to reload.
    Then, quickly run to the end to find a B pad and get a bazooka. Shoot the
    Tediz,
    hop down, grab some chocolate, and prepare for some hairy moments.
    
    Alright, a barrage of Tediz will pop out of both sides of the room and attack
    you. Every time you wipe out a bunch, less and less will come out, but there is
    always pressure. Inbetween attacks, jump out of the turret (A) and grab
    chocolate, then hop back in. Always get rid of Tediz that are close, then work
    your way back. This part requires a LOT of skill, so this may take you a while.
    Those tips above are pretty much all I can really give you, so good luck. When
    you're done, the door will open. Jump out and grab some chocolate. Then head
    down the path and out the door. Good job! That was one of the toughest parts of
    the war (Even though it's quite easy when mastered)! Say, is that the master
    plan on the wall?
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    SAVING PRIVATE RODENT
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    After watching your friend Rodent being attacked, get ready for a surprise
    assault. Take your time and aim at the general, as he is the most dangerous and
    they won't see you until you fire. After the general goes down, strafe left and
    take out the remaining Tediz. They have better guns then the average Tediz, so
    be quick. After Rodent and Conker do some catching up, it's time to head down
    the path full of spider mines and bombers. When a bomb falls, it'll cast a
    shadow, so just jump in the other direction and you'll be fine. When you see a
    spider mine, quickly run behind Rodent's bulletproof clothing and you'll be
    fine
    again. When you reach the other side, Rodent and you will split up. Run down
    the
    path he takes, then turn right along the dock and hop into a small purple boat
    with a B pad built into it. Conker will take out a bazooka. Use it to shoot all
    four of the fireball-looking things on the lock on the giant door to open it.
    Chances are, the Tediz that land will kill you before you reach the door. No
    worries, when you reappear, the door will still be opened, so just run to it
    quickly with Rodent (while dodging the Tediz that will chase you), then enter
    the next area.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    CHEMICAL WARFARE
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    After you enter the Tediz-less area, hop into the class 22 tank. Its controls
    are pretty simple; Z to shoot, C left and C right to rotate the turret gun, A
    to
    hop out, and R to go into first person. Shoot the small door to the left of the
    big one, then hop out of the tank and go in. This room has three acid pools,
    and
    three spider mines. Jump over the acid pool, then when you reach the other
    side,
    hover back and land where you jumped. The spider mine should just run into the
    pool and leave you harmless. Once you reach the end, high jump to grab onto the
    lever to open the door outside... and start acid to overflow. Run as fast as
    you
    can back to where you entered, and hover as little as possible over the pools
    since it slows Conker down. Rather then using the ladder, just high jump at the
    end and run out the door to avoid being drowned in acid. Hop back into the tank
    and through the door to enter the tower.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    THE TOWER
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Though at first the tower may seem intimidating, it's really not that big a
    deal. The objective is to shoot out all four legs of the tower, but giant metal
    plates cover certain areas, making you have to circle the whole thing. However,
    some bridges need lowering, and to do so requires to get out of the tank. Right
    away, go into first person mode and shoot out the first leg. Wait for the giant
    light to be facing away from you, and hop out. Hover over to the other island,
    and jump onto the other side. Quickly run up the bridge and use the B pad to
    unleash Anvil Conker and lower the bridge. Hop back into the tank and run over
    the Tediz, then cross the other bridge and go across the narrow island while
    smushing three other Tediz. When you reach the other bridge that needs
    lowering,
    go into first person and knock out the second leg. Again, wait for the light to
    face away, and hop out and hover to the other island. Using Anvil Conker yet
    again and hop back into the tank. The next bunch of Tediz may be a bit
    trickier,
    but keep trying and you'll eventually smush them. Cross the odd shaped bridge
    and meet the last one you'll need to lower. Shoot out the third leg, wait for
    the light, and hop out. This time, there are three Tediz behind the bridge, so
    be quick about getting to the B pad and hopping back into the tank. Smush all
    the Tediz, including one behind you, cross the bridge, shoot out the last leg,
    and hop into the new hole.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    LITTLE GIRL
    =-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Head down the metallic platform and into the center of the ground to find a
    little girl crying. After talking to her, go to the giant stone carving where
    you can see submarines shooting missiles. After one has been shot, head back
    out
    and onto the platform sticking out with a B pad. Use the bazooka to shoot at
    the
    submarines. Careful, though, because of the constant waves you might miss. If a
    submarine shoots out a missile, immediately track it and shoot it. You wouldn't
    want it to hit you, would you? Once three subs are destroyed at this area, head
    to the next one with 6 waiting to be destroyed. This time, though, there will
    be
    two at a time, meaning more frequent missiles coming your way. Once that lot
    has
    been taken care of, go to the last station with VERY frequent attacks and two
    subs at a time. You'll need to get very good shots here, or else consider
    yourself toast. There are eight at this station, and when they're taken care
    of,
    go back to the little girl to find out her shocking truth.
    
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    THE EXPERIMENT
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    Rodent will warn Conker just a bit too late, and the experiment will come out
    and battle you. Quickly run and hop into the tank and ride into one of those
    stone carvings, where you'll be safe. Though the experiment's weapons may be
    impressive, they're nothing due to the fact that they need to reload. You
    advantage here is that your turret can face other direction then the tank. Face
    it towards the experiment, and wait for it to reload. Then, press forward (not
    side, forward, because the tank is facing a different direction) and when
    you're
    out of safety, fire, then go back in. That should get rid of one of the
    weapons.
    Do the same to the other. When the giant experiment charges, quickly get out of
    the stone carving and go into first person. Shoot the girl to knock her off,
    then when the giant experiment bends over to pick her up, shoot a small button
    that pops open in the back of the experiment. If you do this right, you'll
    barely have to move from your safety. Head back into the carving and listen to
    the girl rant about her plasma thingies. Since these don't reload, head to one
    side of the carving for it to shoot there, then quickly head out the other and
    fire. Do this twice, then repeat the above. Now the girl will use missiles;
    again, wait for her to reload then fire the hell outta one of them. After the
    button has been hit a third time, the little girl will use spider mines to
    destroy your tank and knock Rodent out. Afterwards, she'll use a self-destruct
    button. That's right, buddy, you've got 4:30 minutes (that's 270 seconds) to
    get
    the hell out of here. Start running.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    COUNTDOWN
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    Hop down the hole right in front of you to end up in a shaky hallway full of
    lasers and a few Tediz. Use the following to get by the lasers:
    
    LASERS 1: Stay to the left and high jump, then immediately hover over the
    lasers.
    
    LASERS 2: Crawl under all four of them. The black line on the floor should be
    your route.
    
    LASERS 3: Stay on the left and hover at an angle to end up on the right side.
    
    LASERS 4: Jump onto the box, then hop and hover between the hole in the lasers.
    Around the corner are two Tediz, so be careful.
    
    LASERS 5: Hop onto the box (with your guns in your pockets) and quickly crawl
    between them. Around the corner is another Tediz.
    
    LASERS 6: A bit tough to see, but jump onto the box and crawl under the first
    laser, then jump at the edge of the box and hover over the last one.
    
    LASERS 7: Oh, this is a tough one! How about we crawl under them?
    
    You'll now lose your guns. Go to the other side, where blue lasers will
    suddenly
    block off the exit. Press B to take out a bazooka, and kill the Tediz that
    emerge from the room. There are only three of them, so no biggie. Now it's time
    for the utterly overrated BEACH.
    
    Okay, grab chocolate to the left, and head down the path. Kill the first Tediz
    with your bazooka- this will be the only one you will. Many guides have given
    insanely complex ways to kill all the Tediz and THEN go to the boat. But to
    that, I say: pfffft. All you have to do is go in a zigzag direction while
    jumping like mad, and you should be better off. It may take you three or four
    tries, but it's a LOT better then all that crazy nonsense about killing all the
    Tediz. Once at the boat, enjoy the final sub-chapter... if you can even
    consider
    it to be one.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    PEACE AT LAST
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    The war's over, you survived, and the Tediz stronghold has exploded.
    Congratulations!
    
    ********************************************************************************
    CHAPTER 9: THE HEIST
    ********************************************************************************
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    THE WINDMILL'S DEAD
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    After leaving the navy base and re-entering Windy, look around and you should
    notice quite a lot of damage. Run towards Mrs. Bee's hive destroyed (along with
    herself), and cross the bridge. Go through the giant piece of wood and up the
    hill (There won't be any worms this time). At the top, Conker will see the
    ruined windmill and talk to Rodent. Once he leaves, jump down the hole ahead
    and
    go through the cave to enter an area you couldn't reach earlier. Walk around
    the
    side of the building and step in front of the Boss. He'll assign you to rob the
    Feral Reserve Bank, along with Berri. Get in that skin tight leather and take
    out your guns, because a Matrix spoof is in order.
    
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    ENTER THE VERTEX
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    After an awesome introduction full of guns, run down in front of the pillar. In
    this sub-chapter, you must advance down the hallway going from pillar to
    pillar,
    using the B pads in front of each one to do a deadly jump and shoot all the
    guards. The jump will be on slow motion, and there'll be a blue target. Use Z
    to
    fire, and the analog stick to move around the target. When the person turns
    red,
    that's when you know that if you shoot you'll hit him. You have to do it right,
    though, because there's no chocolate in this bank. When in the air, Berri will
    take hits for you. The number of guards at each pillar will increase, so near
    the last few, the best time to jump is when you hear a loud shot of "Regroup!".
    If you wait too long, though, the guards will shoot out the pillar and leave
    you
    defenseless. After about 5 pillars, you'll reach the elevator and ride up to
    the
    cash.
    
    =-=-=-=-=
    THE VAULT
    =-=-=-=-=
    
    It's time for the final sub-chapter of the game. I won't spoil the cut scene,
    so let's just get down to the boss strategy. After watching the dramatic cut
    scene, jump onto the switch attached to the big platform to open an airlock and
    an alcove. Hop into the alcove to get into a space suit, where you'll be able
    to fight the alien. After he knocks Berri into space, get used to your
    controls.
    
    A = Jump
    Hold down A = Hover for a few seconds
    B = Punch
    Z = Shield
    
    The alien has two attacks; leaning back then head-butting you, and spinning
    around his tail. He'll do the latter more often then the head-butt. When he
    head-butts you, just press Z to shield yourself with your hands. When he spins,
    tap A (don't hold it down) to jump over his tail. Once you catch him off-guard,
    continuously tab B in front of him to punch him four times. Once he's down,
    step around and grab his tail. Like in Super Mario 64, you'll have to spin him
    around. But unlike Super Mario 64, you have to throw him out of an airlock, AND
    you don't have to spin as rapidly. Spin slowly then get slightly faster until
    his claws no longer touch the ground. Spin him around three or four more times
    in the air, then aim and press A to throw him out of the airlock. You'll need
    to do this twice more. The second time he dodges more often, so you'll have to
    be quicker. He'll also jump over your head sometimes, so back up a bit when
    he's in mid-air to avoid being hit while the camera spins. After he's been
    thrown out the second time and come back in, he'll need one more good throw
    out. By now it's as likely to get him down after a tail spin as it is to win
    the lottery, so you'll have to punch him rapidly IMMEDIATELY after dodging a
    head-butt (He'll be off guard after being hit by your steel hands). Once he's
    out the air lock a third time, the final cut scene will play.
    
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    END CUTSCENE
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=
    
    A big congratulations to you on finishing Conker's Bad Fur Day. Now it's time
    to enjoy one of the greatest game endings on any video game system. I won't
    spoil any of it, so just sit back and watch the not-so happy ending to the
    game.
    
    All that's left to do now is to finish the game a second time.
    
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    
    IV.                           C  R  E  D  I  T  S
    
    
    ================================================================================
    
    Of course, I didn't do everything by myself. Special thanks goes out to...
    
    My friends Klobber, BaronKrusha, and Retriever II, for checking my work and
    seeing if it's accurate.
    
    http://members.aol.com/sdallas19/faqs/writing_guide.txt, for help on organizing
    a walkthrough.
    
    Microsoft Word, because for ONCE it wasn't a pain to write on.
    
    The media, to give Rare the guts to make this game.
    
    Rare, for having the guts and genius to make this game.
    
    Everyone that read this guide, for making this whole thing worth while!
    ________________________________________________________________________________
    That's all, folks, and keep hoping for OBD!