Review by blueb11

"Just because it's a fun show doesn't mean it can pull rank in the video game world"

South Park for Nintendo 64. Hm… When this somehow came into our family collection of Nintendo games, I, not being that great a fan of the show at the time, looked at it with tiny amounts of loathing mixed in with much more curiosity. So I played it. And I, being young, just didn't understand why turkeys attacking a small mountain town were funny. But now I do. So now I'm here to write a review.

PLOT [rated: S for Strange]

The plot of this M-rated game is amusing. Somehow, aliens have managed to find their way to South Park. And the aliens are using turkeys and clones and other disturbing, messed up things to take over the town. Enter Cartman, Stan, Kenny, and Kyle: of course the last line of defense for the Colorado town. Who else?

Sound [rated: U for Um....]

It's weird, wonky music that may make you want to hit your head on a lamppost after awhile. While it's not as bad as bluegrass, it sure isn't System of a Down.

The voices are pretty good. Chef, who always seems to know what's going on just before you do, (and who ALWAYS has a woman in his bed,) is still voiced by the talented Isaac Hayes, and the others are voiced by their respective talents. It's even true that you can't understand Kenny, which makes him playable for younger players.

ANIMATION [rated: B for Blocky]

The animation is, as described above, blocky. I would say, 'What more can you expect from an N64 game?' but then I would remember games where the animation wasn't so horrid, such as... Banjo-Kazooie... Super Mario 64... Etc.

Nonetheless, it is quite amusing seeing 3-D versions of Comedy Central's most beloved elementary school kids.

GAME PLAY [rated: I for Interesting]

Find turkey. Throw snowball. Pick up toy gun. Shoot clone. Etc., etc.

Like other first person shooters (which I hate to call this game, but it is what it is,) you find new weapons that have distinct ways of shooting at enemies. For example, there is one weapon that shoots out toilet plungers. On the other hand, you can just toss the standard snowball at the clone's ugly head.

However regular the game play might seem (and how repetitive it gets after the first couple of levels,) there are exciting things in the game that might grab your attention. This game has you doing some exceedingly whacky things. Have you ever tried to shoot at a giant turkey's bunshole? Or waddled through seemingly abandoned warehouses to find and eliminate clones of the resident 'cigarette'? Well, you will have within the first dozen missions.

MULTI-PLAYER [rated: S for Sweet]

Want to shoot yellow snowballs at Cartman? Well then, the multi-player is right for you. This has you playing in a variety of levels (from near the school to in a warehouse). You can even toss explosive Terrence & Phillip dolls to tick off your enemies. Unfortunately, this would be much more fun if it weren't for the…

CONTROLS [rated: G for Geez…]

This is a first person shooter. And that is what is wrong with this game. The controls are kind of slow, kind of confusing, and kind of awkward. You may not even know a turkey is nibbling on your backside unless you hear the gobbles and hear the obscenities shouted by your young protagonists.

Still, the controls are insanely simple to figure out, and are pretty easy to use. The limited camera control is a pain in the buns, though.

CHEATS [rated: A for Awesome]

Without cheats, I would be lost. Do you want to unlock all the characters in multi-player mode? Wanna be invincible without eating Cheesy Poofs? Maybe it is your desire that you never, ever run out of toilet plungers. Well, why not? The cheat system is this game is entertaining; you enter every letter into a decoder ring, and amusing fart noises sounding every time you select a letter.

SAVING [rated: C for Crud]

You need a Rumble Pack. If you don't, you can't save. If you can't save, you have to play all the beginning levels over and over again to get back to where you were. And with the repetitiveness of this game, that just isn't something you want to do.

REPLAY [rated: W for Why?]

This game gets extremely boring because of it is repetitive. This game gets extremely boring because of it is repetitive. This game gets extremely boring because of it is repetitive. But if you really, really, really, really love hitting big clones in the head and hearing their haunted cries of pain, then more power to you.

WHY IS IT RATED M?

Why is the sky blue? Because Cartman, Kyle, Stan and Kenny can't keep control of their mouths and Chef can't control his libido. Because you aim plungers at a turkey's hole. It's nothing as bad as the South Park movie, it's everything like the show. Minus all the fun, controversial stuff that makes the show actually interesting… hm…

BUY OR RENT [consensus: RENT]

Even if you really, really love South Park, this isn't a game that you'll take that much to. I would reckon it's good for maybe one complete play-through, so rent is the best way to go. If you don't have a Rumble Pack, make sure to leave your Nintendo 64 on. You don't want to have to go through all of it again.

In conclusion... It's South Park. Without the entertaining controversy, and without a sense of real excitement. But it's still South Park. And you can be pretty sure that, somewhere in the game, Kenny's gonna die.


Reviewer's Score: 4/10 | Originally Posted: 07/10/06


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