Review by sybastard

"This game hurts all who play"

Ok I saw this game sitting in a giant bin of random N64 games and thought what the heck is this? For only $3 I had to pick it up. I came home and saw no one had cared enough to even write a review for this game so I thought I would.

Game Play 2/10 It is a basic soccer game and the controls work to a point. You can pass, shoot, and slide tackle. So when you pick up the game and it says Mia Hamm's soccer on it you are at least getting what would appear to be a soccer game. Funny thing is I did a little research and it seems like they just ported another soccer game from europe and put Mia Hamm's name and had her do some commentary.

Graphics 1/10 No effort was put into this game what so ever. Every single player looks the same at least they made two different skin tones black and white. Before you wonder if it is a female soccer game due to it being Mia Hamm's soccer I can tell you that after playing for an hour or so I still have no idea. Sure Mia Hamm says they are female with her commentary but they really look like men. All the players have long hair in a ponytail and every persons hair is ether black or brown. Though the uniforms are different colors it doesn't matter because the crowd is dressed in all black and are waving black flags.

Sound 1/10 There is really no music other then the menus and it is so generic and forgettable it you will not remember any of it. Mia Hamm does provide commentary and I will sum it all up for you. Great, Good, Excellent (insert random soccer move). That is it there really is nothing else she says other then making sure she does say she or her so you think you are playing a woman's soccer game.

Replay 1/10 Ok there is no reason to play this game for more then a few seconds anyway so why go back. and play more. After playing this game for about an hour I have removed it from my system and it will rest on top of other great N64 games such as Body Harvest, and Quest 64.

Final Verdict It is not like you were going to buy this game anyway even if it is only a few bucks but this review should have told you what you already knew. It is a soccer game featuring Mia Hamm and that is all, nothing more nothing less


Reviewer's Score: 1/10 | Originally Posted: 02/13/06


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