"The only good thing about this game was that it made me laugh at it's ridiculous awfulness. What a video shame!"

Synopsis: Apparently this was a hyped up gimmicky game that came out in the early 1990's as “52 games in one!”, yet turned out so bad that even Nintendo refused the official seal of quality. And yes, it's that bad. The premise is simple, you take 52 mini-games and add them into one NES cartridge. There is a general amount of diversity, other than half of them being boring generic space shooters. The other games are, well… Interesting. Here's the thing though: Every last game in this bundle of crap is horrible. Not even ONE good game. Infact, 2 of the games don't even work! Didn't they even have a program editor? I can't tell as there are no credits, due to no ending, due to not enough patience to play through this garbage. Maybe they didn't make credits on purpose for fear of a death threat for time/money wasted on this video shame.

Graphics: A lot of diverse games bring a lot of good graphics right? No. It's hard enough to find an NES game with good graphics, let alone when they divide it into 52 sections. They probably spent about a third of each 8-bits on one game, honestly. Some games literally look like Atari, where as others are diareah-ish colors with a two-pixilated sprite. Most of the time I was like, “Is that a toaster oven chasing me or just a blob of colors?” When all said and done, let's face it, this game is pure ugly, everything about it, and particularly the graphics. WOW! 52 shades of puke!

Play Control: Don't even get me started. Okay, you just did. This game has some of the worst play control of any game I have ever played. It's even worse than Athena! Granted, some of the games are half way decent control-wise. But then there are the “platform games”, which falls more into the genre of not “being able to get past the first obstacle due to jumping issues game”. That's right, it seems every lame attempt at a platform game in this cartridge is plagued by the fact that the characters cannot move left or right while jumping. Isn't that the whole point of a platform game?! Didn't the programmer(Which is an overstatement.), realize that you CANNOT beat a game when you can't move while jumping?! You will walking along and then you see a pit or enemy. Naturally you jump, but when you press right, you go nowhere, thus landing and getting killed as you touch the ground. Wow, I can't wait until the sequel!

Game Design: Okay, so I have to give it to them, 52 games in one DOES sound good, but apparently the good ideas stopped there. Whoever designed this game should be shot in the face at close range. Seriously. The designers had to be on some kind of hallucinogen, and judging by some of the games, I can almost verify that. It's like they made the games by pulling random cards from Pictionary and trying to make a game out of it. “Table Lamp? No problem! Let's call it “Lethal Lights” and put it into that 52 games idea cartridge!” They probably made this game as a college prank for a real project while drunk at 3AM. Then finished at 6AM.

Satisfaction: This game actually was enjoyable. How? Because it was hysterical! It made me a laugh… a lot! The game itself sucks, but I was rolling on the floor all throughout it at the utter ridiculousness. “Sharks” was the funniest as I never thought any game could get so lame. Aside from the kind of entertainment from listening to the characters on Mystery Science Theater 3000 diss old B-movies, as I did with this game, the rest of it is horrible obviously. If I had no sense of humor, this game is just depressing it's so bad.

Sound: The sounds in this game go from no music(Guess they ran out of memory because they had to cram most of it into the 2 games that don't work.), to random high pitched notes. There was one game that seriously just sounded like a toddler on a synthesizer picking notes. Other ones were just boring old monotony. There was also that other game where the entire soundtrack was just constant buzzing, probably my favorite music. The only cool thing sound wise was the game's intro. It was an actual good sounding version of that one rap song from the 80's “It takes two to make the things all right.”, with an actual *gasp* voice recording! I think the makers wasted all the game's space on the intro, and then realized they had hardly any left to make 52 games with.

Comments: This game is badder than bad. Only play for kicks like I did. It will make you laugh at its stupidity. Don't take this game seriously or you'll kill yourself. You would think, “Oh, 52 mini-games, kind of like Mario Party, right?” Then you get a taste of the scum at the bottom of the barrel of video games. As a homage to the worst, I now give a brief synopsis of every “game” in this cartridge:

Firebreathers: Two dragons fly around a screen and shoot each other. There are about 8 levels and you realize that this is the only sole two player game out of the 52. Then you realize that this game isn't even good enough to have one person play it, now how the hell are you going to drag somebody else into this? Then you proceed to shoot the enemy dragon that is stationary about 5 times and it dies. This being the only game you can stomach to beat, you see an ending! Wait, no you don't, you just see a “Game Over” then it takes you back to the main menu. NEXT!

Star Evil: Wow, a space shooter! I was wondering when they would finally put that genre on the NES! Well, better enjoy this one while I can, as they can't possibly re-use the same kind of game once with 50 others, right? Right?! Damn, I didn't enjoy it as they put an obstacle to kill me instantly literally one second as the game begins. Once you finally see game over and manage to move past that obstacle, you realize that the rest of the game isn't much better and then you quit.

Illuminator: What's the plot of this stupid game? You're a guy with pink hair and an orange face shooting perfectly rectangular rays of light at random snaggletooth dunces pacing around aimlessly. Then you climb a latter and do the same for another guy. Then it become dark and you can't see anything until you hear the game over tune. Who wants to play a game where the only colors are black and… black. You can't see, so you die, and that's apparently supposed to be fun. I'll pass.

G-Force: Watch as your cheap pink blob of a spaceship shoots at what looks like Christmas trees and diamonds… In space again. Only this time you are moving vertically and you cannot go too far up or down or you will randomly explode. That is, if the graphics don't get messed up first. Not much to mess them up either, as this whole mini-game's graphics look like a one toned 1rst grade drawing on a computer program from 1987.

Ooze: So you're a guy that apparently likes green as your clothes, hair, world, EVERYTHING is green. And your career is based off of blasting mutant blobs with a ray gun. The only problem? When this great “ooze” fighter realizes his arch-nemesis, worse than a giant booger itself: A small hole. What's so bad about a hole? Jumping over it. What's so bad about jumping over it? The fact that this great ooze blasting hero apparently doesn't know how to do a running jump, thus falling to his doom 9 out of 10 times, so the one rare chance you make it, you will get oozed by a blob and have to start all over again. Can't wait, where's the controller?!

Silver Sword: The closest game to anything good: Zelda. And by saying that is blasphemy. How is it like Zelda? You are a guy with a sword and you can throw unlimited amounts of them at monsters. What great monsters face this mighty brave one? Something that sort of resembles a wiggling scrotum. At least our hero can hide in the endless sea of plain green. Then maybe he can get far enough to the next level. Oh no, the scrotum is gaining leeway! Dead, now you have to start the level over again when you were walking fine for 5 minutes straight past the same rock over and over again.

Critical Bypass: Since I don't know what the hell is going on in this game, I will just call it “Critical Failure”. So you are some orb that is floating over a land that must have been cut out of a newspaper. Get chased by moldy blue Cocoa Puffs while avoiding Tetris-ish blocks. Then shooft random bullets at obstacles. Just don't make the biggest mistake of all: Forgetting to add color to your game like this mini-game's programmer did,

Jupiter Scope: You are a rocket that shoots balls of fire crashing down on you in outer space! It's so fun, you could do this for hours! Literally! The whole game is shooting slow boring dull comets with depressing music. Depressing because you know you are wasting time playing this stuff. Keep shooting comets for about 10 minutes to gain access to level 2 of… more of the same stuff. I can hardly wait!

Alfredo In The Fettuc: What's fettuc? Oh you mean fettuccini? Why did they forget the end of the word? Oh I see why now: THEY ALSO FORGOT THE ENTIRE GAME! No joke. You start up this game to realize you get a blank screen and have to reset the game. It's on any ROM/version you play folks. The program editor must have called in sick that day. Did the game not meet it's deadline to gain a seal of quality?! It must have as the game you buy has no game at all! Oh well, I wouldn't want to play a game about pasta anyways. LAME!

Operation Full Moon: Back in space again? I see astronomy must be this game's favorite subject. That or High School dropout. So you are on the moon this time, as every other aspect to space was already milked for ideas. Become excited as your moon rover crashes into the square that used to be a gun turrent, even though you can pass those kind of things in pretty much every other shooting scroller. Oh well, even if you don't hit a square and die instantly, thus making you start over again; you might as well: Nothing gets more exciting in this mini-game, you would be better off watching the clock tick or something.

Dam Builders: And damn, another bad game. The first game with a kiddie flair to it, you are a beaver and you and green rhinos and penguin things go at it by chucking meat balls at each other. Why this is occurring, nobody knows. But I do know, you walk along, surpassing random creatures shooting at you, and walking down paths avoiding them. I know what your thinking, and yes, that's the whole game, including annoying carnival music. Fun.

Thrusters: Oh no, were in space again. Yes, again. This time there is even less detail surrounding you, aside from things that looks a little bit like… well… private parts of various sorts. Maybe that's why the programmers named this game thrusters. Well the only thing I will thrust, is this game out the window.

Haunted Halls: Also called Haunted Hill on the main screen, even though it takes place in a castle. Starring a very… bustly woman. Too bad hitting a corner of a pit will even get her to pop and die, so don't even go against evil demons and ghosts! Oh well, at least haunted places have moon gravity, right? I say this as it's one of the only platformers where you cannot only jump right and left, but you float in the air for a few moments. I never thought a hefty woman could glide through haunted prisons like that! This game is better than others in this crap-package, but nowhere near good. Only good enough for a laugh.

Chill Out: An Antarctic themed Donkey Kong. Only without the lovable character, gameplay, and just plain coldness. The music is random notes put into a blender and they are all high pitched. You climb up ladders then end up walking halfway through the floor only to accidentally fall into the score display and die by freezing. That makes sense! Now all I gotta do is figure out why the other gorilla Eskimos are blinking? Oh yeah, it's because the programmers didn't spend enough time getting rid of glitches, that's right! They “chilled out” too long I guess.

Sharks: Haha, probably my favorite game out of the 52… To laugh at! You are a scuba diver shooting at endless sharks. It looks like animal cruelty as none of the sharks ever really come near you, and they NEVER do at the top of the screen. But this murderer just shoots random sharks all day long while wiggling his legs to the goofy music. Here's a new plot: Just dance around the screen and shoot randomly. Then see how long you can go without giggling at this game's stupidity. The best part? Bubbles that don't move.

Megalonia: Outer space with an all new twist! That is, without a new twist I mean. It seems every spaced out shooter gets less and less detailed as they go on. This one is another vertical shooter with less sprites, except for the stuff that looks like it should kill you but doesn't at the top of the screen. It's okay, things come an inch more towards exciting when you finally see the boss and die, thus having to go through this monotony once again if you want to beat this game. And by beat, I should say with a hammer.

French Baker: Here's the sad plight of a stereotypical French baker who took some LSD and everything in his 3 floored, multi-platformed kitchen started attacking him. Watch in horror as giant half-eaten donuts spring to life and chase you. And cover your eyes as desk drawers bounce back and force endlessly. Better throw some plates at them to destroy those evil foes! Oh well, if worse comes to worse, you can always walk where there is no floor to a ladder and then die randomly for no reason, that's always fun!

Atmos Quake: Space game #8. Why didn't they just name this game “Space shooters 52”?! This time around, explore the final frontier as a V-shaped ship going through a more metallic wall. This should be even more exciting! Too bad it isn't.

Meong: A combination of the words “Mess” and “Pong”, this game is as basic as Pong only it's a mess. It tries to be “Minesweeper”, without the helpful hints that game gives you, that you NEED to beat the game. You control a scribbly line in a box that moves along a gridded board. Avoiding the holes seems like all the challenge, until you realize that after awhile, any given square you move across can and will indeed kill you, thus making you restart the damn thing over again. That's right, this game is basically: “Move onto random squares and hope they don't blow up and kill you, even though there is no way to tell if they will or not”. Sounds just like my type of game!

Space Dreams: They should just make X=Outer Space as it ends up as a variable in every game in this stupid cartridge. Now they add a “dream” spin to space, which makes even less sense than to why this game was made. You are literally a flying pacifier and you shoot stars at Teddy Grahams(That shoot stuff at you with their crotch), and giant safety pins in orbit. The only thing that makes sense here is that you are flying over scribbles that look like a dog made. Oh yeah, I was only kidding about that part of the game making sense.

Streemerz: You play as a daring clown to boldly scope a circus-type tower like it was nobodies business. Use your grappling hook to gain new heights and then whip the other maniacal clowns running in circles. Kill a clown and it will turn into a giant green frowning face, naturally. But don't get greedy and get the money that looks like a bag of points. It will randomly kill you and make you start this game over again. Yep.

Spread Fire: Man, even the space ideas are running out of ideas! The only thing space related here is the background which slightly resembles the bottom of an outhouse, but yet it's enough to tell you that were in space again! But you don't have a spaceship anymore. Instead, you are in what resembles a giant metal lobster shooting green orbs endlessly at random junk that looks like appliances. Oh no, better stop that dangerous thing that kind of resembles a coffee pot! Not the muffler shaped thing! Don't let that stereo speaker get you! If you keep shooting, you will win and go onto the next level with the same crap, but different color background. What a great way to pass the time. I will spread fire to this game, as in throwing it in the fire.

Bubble Gum Rosy: Also spelled Rossie. The token game for girl players. But equally as bad. You are some chick that was probably a cheerleader as she can jump really high, abnormally even, about three times her body height. But she didn't make the squad as she can't jump right or left either. This game has such bad jumping controls, the game even taunts you by making obstacles that rely on you strategically using the lame controls to maneuver around. Since white girls can't jump… at least to the right, the game will make bouncing things to walk under, rather than by jumping over them like you would expect. It's all well though, as you reach a bird with a head the size of a wrecking ball that will touch you and you die by popping as that's the most popular way to die by teenage girls these days. Oh yeah, the game also has a bubble gum these to it, as if it wasn't already lame enough. Joy.

Micro Mike: “Mike” looks more like an asthma inhaler getting flushed through a septic tank. So a shooting game that isn't in space actually exists? Well space or no space, this game is still not good. It's one of those games where the background moves super fast, thus making you rely on fast reflexes to not crash, even though you will anyways 5 times until you realize what is going on. At least they gave you more than one life unlike most of the other games in this cartridge. That still doesn't save this mini-game from when the graphics jumble up a few seconds into it, obscuring your view as you crash and then turn off the game.

Underground: So you play as a bloated bug-eyed Steve Erkel-ish guy that for some reason fell into an underground mine. You can fall 30 feet and be okay, but don't you DARE touch the little golden mushroom or else you will spin in full circles… and then DIE! Also don't get hit by those… triangle road signs? Or else more deathly spinning will ensue. It's a maze of sort, and also amazing that this sort of crap passes for a game.

Rocket Jockey: Even though they call it jock on the main screen. It takes up to much space to add “EY”. This mini-games is probably one of the lamest in this series. You are a cowboy riding a rocket like it's the last day of your life. But the background is a dull brown and it looks more like you are riding on an enema going through a colon. But there's no need to fear, you now find out why a cowboy needs to ride a rocket: To shoot deadly flying blue cows and other bandits on rockets. Thanks for telling me, it all makes sense now!

Non Human: Meaning no human would actually play this game. You play as a paper airplane? I am only guessing, which is bad when you have to guess what you EVEN ARE! Anyways, the plot? To jump across a small gap. But the challenge? That you cannot jump, thus making it impossible. If you fall you land into the scariest thing I ever seen in a cheap game: Giant green clown faces with fangs and purple sunglasses. The real challenge here is learning how to jump over the pit. Once you try 100 times and do make it over, then you will just die at the first enemy as the controls are as hideous as the clown faces in this level. A game should not have its challenge be trying to get the controls good enough to actually jump over the pit that you need to get past. Horrible.

Cry Baby: A really good game! Sike, just playin. This game sucks like the rest of them too. It has to be the lamest concept for a game, as you play as a baby! And you crawl around and spray stuff at random men and women pacing incessantly back and forth, whom I am assuming are this fugly little kid's parents. Sometimes duplicates of your strange wandering parents will appear and your dad looks like a 1940's gangster tap-dancing. Apparently, the whole game is climbing on furniture to the next floor of your house made of ice cubes. But don't fall even an inch off that sofa. Or else you will see baby cry while he hit nothing in mid-air. Also they decided to use a lullaby as the theme music, which is vomit inducing. Avoid this crap.

Slashers: Whoa! An actions packed crime fighter on a rooftop, this HAS to be good, right? RIGHT?! Nope. Boring sidecrolling fighter with horrid controls and a Grammy for best randomly placed notes in a musical score in a bad video game. Stay glued to your seat for seconds, as your two toned hero fights off the same bad guy after another, along side the same sprite from the “Haunted Hill” heroine. And that's it. Did I mention how somehow, when this awesome crime fighter sees a bad guy, his stamina is so amazing that he can't even run past them, even by an inch? Well at least he can move up and down. He can't do that either? Bummer. I love realistic games like this, don't you? Slash this game in half with a buzz saw.

Crazy Shuffle: Your are a tiny guy running around some poorly drawn maze, shooting dots at randomly placed clusters of pixels while listening to a tune with even more random crappy notes in it than the last game. You don't know where you are, what you are, what you are doing, or why. All you know is that you turn into a heart shaped cloud if you touch the flowers. Great plot, huh? Too bad the game sucks, it kind of ruined it.

Fuzz Power: This game tried to put a little humor into it, but it didn't make me laugh when I realized I was playing another horrendous platformer where you jump awkwardly. So awkwardly, your character seems to float for a second when in the air. It's like trying to swim through glue. And what the hell is that thing anyways? You play as a caveman like ball of pubic hair with hideous big feet. Get hurt and you look like a piece of gum covered in lint. Get hit again and you turn into this bald deformed naked guy. Then you die. Good, we need less bald deformed naked guys with huge feet in this world, thank you malfunctioning coding!

Shooting gallery: By far, one of the lamest games in this cartridge, and that's saying a lot! You basically move left and right and shoot endlessly at random animals, such as alligators and horses, because of course those are the best animals to hunt. Nothing can hurt you though, and you don't lose points, but just gain them. The realistic graphics and genius game play of shooting endlessly with no real point to do so will keep you exhilarated for hours! What happens if I keep shooting? The screen is going dark after 30 seconds, I can't wait for the next level? No next level? Oh, never mind, the game crashes after 30 seconds?! Good, let's keep it that way.

Lollipop(s): You are the savior knight of candy land apparently. You play as the hero that can't jump again, this time wielding a mighty sword? No, a mighty lollipop, sounds epic! Use your candy sucker to whack other ugly scribbles of sugary sweets in an all around ugly background. But don't let the poor controls get you killed! If you do, you turn into a pile of lollipops! My brain just lost half its cells, somebody make sense of this crap!

Evil Empire: You play as two moving pixels obliterating what the world's worst empire is of course: India. Don't let the stereotypical magic carpet riders shoot random orbs at you or you'll die! Also remember not to fall of a cliff as you will die. But not by the landing, somehow in mid-air where there is no platform. Better yet, don't play this game, you might die.

Sombreros: You are some really stereotypical Mexican collecting hundreds of sombreros that don't look like sombreros. All you do is run up a street past the same houses, with the same 5 notes, collecting the same hat. Eventually it mixes things up when the houses disappear and you collect more random hats in the desert. Watch out for the cars though! Shoot cars to make them turn into tombstones. So let me get this straight: You are an illegal immigrant in San Diego throwing rocks at endless innocent drivers to KILL them, because your hat collection all wound up in the middle of the road?! And why so many damn hats! The illogicality of this game drives me insane! ARGH!

Storm Over The Desert: This game doesn't have a political message, does it? Play as some rusty old tank that moves the pace of a caterpillar, and shoot hot pink tanks in a green desert. You die after about 50,000 hits and that's the whole game. But watch out for the giant Saddam Hussein's that randomly walk out onto the screen, yet do nothing, but make you laugh at the stupidity of this game, and that there are two giant Hussein's walking across the screen at the same time. My favorite trivia fact from the Gulf War was Iraq's secret weapon: Giant cloned dictators. Good thing they didn't unleash that in the current Iraq war! This is also known as George W. Bush's favorite game, and I think he designed this game and all others in this package too.

Mash Man: They took the same deformed naked guy from “Fuzz Power”, put bright clothes on him, and made his feet 3 times bigger. Then they placed him in a multi-colored level and make him jump on random pixels that don't show up completely from glitches. Jump on stuff, but not every other random sprite, or you will die. Did I mention that this game is hideous? Let the nightmares begin.

They Came…: And then left when they played this game. By George, another space shooter, yay! What does this space shooter have that the other 10,000 don't? A screen that doesn't move, even MORE boredom, and the ability to crash no matter what, 20 seconds into the game! “I was playing this really terrible game, when they came… And made my game crash!”

Lazer League: Everything about this game is obnoxious to the senses. Look, they even spelled laser wrong! The music is pretty cool though, that is, if you like a low tone of buzz throughout the whole game! At least they tried a new concept this time when they took a shooter and… put it into outer space! Strategy: Just stay at the top the whole time and you won't get hit once. Then you can fight the weird Pacman shaped ship that is half disappearing due to glitches, and shoots dots at you that defy the law of physics when it flies faster than it's projectiles. Yawn. Moving on.

Billy Bob: The next most adventurous name after Bubba Van Cletus was taken. This game is epic as it tries(and fails) to mimic Indiana Jones, complete with the most effort in this entire game: a jump with three different sprite animation in it! WOW! Too bad the jump still is plague ridden with error. Make it past the first room of the cave, to… fall off a cliff and die, NO MATTER WHAT! That's right, you can't beat this game at all past the first room. Better yet, you can't even play this game at all, due to its crappiness. At least they didn't put music into it, phew.

City Of Doom: Which translates into “Game Of Doom”. You climb up a skyscraper so tall, it reaches outer space.(Probably to get to the next lame space shooter) But don't even THINK about touching a window or you will get hurt. Also watch out for the human sized bees and scores of bowling balls falling out windows as you know that the leading cause of death for people who climb tall buildings. Why are you doing this? I don't know. But maybe this game can make like the Tower of Babel and get destroyed by God.

Bits and Pieces: Oh okay, that title makes sense. Who wouldn't call a game with a dead guy jumping over monsters that?! You play as some zombie guy which must have a bad case of rigor mortis as he has NO animation when he jumps. But at least they made a game where you can jump! Jump over other Halloween-esque monsters in a black and white graveyard, in order to… Um… In order to… Find your grocery list. I don't know honestly.

Beeps and Blip: If one could crap out video games, this game is a diarrhea splat of a mess of more random sprites for yet another tired old space shooter. This time, your ship is not a lobster, or circle, but a… diamond shaped object! You can also get one-ups, too many even. But who wants more lives in this game? That means you have to play it longer.

Manchester: Starring Billy Ray Cyrus. Or at least his mullet. You can tell that this game came out in 1991, no? Oh wait, I was judging by the mullet and 80's rocker appeal. Graphically? Maybe 1981 or before. So your some mullet-toting music fool who can jump 20 feet in the air awkwardly, and is so tubular that you make a musical ditty when you jump dude! Like totally. You play in some giant red bricked room and hop over blocks of musical notes while dodging flying flowers. Well that's logical. Watch out for the gothic punk rocker guy though, he is the arch-nemesis to hair metal from 1987.

Boss: You are a toad man superhero? And your in a city getting past monsters. Are not superheroes supposed to be super and heroes? Are they not also supposed to be able to jump correctly and not like they have cement blocks to their feet in zero gravity?! Lame graphics, lame controls, lame plot if one exists which it doesn't of course, lame everything. Enough already!

Dedant: Protect your ant colony as it's attacked by other ants! You're the hot pink ant, the others are the green ants! Throw grains of sand at the invaders that throw rocks back at you! Aw, too bad your ant is alone and crippled, as the invaders can move in all directions but you can only move right and left, a damn shame! The best part? When the other ants that are seemingly more versatile than you, corner you and then kill you. I love it when that happens because they can move up and down, whereas I can't, thus I die. Yay. At least when I die, I have more incentive to turn off this game.

Hambo's Adventures: You are a pig with a bowl cut, walking up some platforms while dodging balls. Why? To get to a door. Behind that door? More of the same to lead you to another door, and so on. Here's the thing: The game is damn near tediously impossible. For starters, when I first picked this game up, I must have tried 100 times to get past the first room, but the little piggie never quite seemed to jump right, which is hard when you have to jump past obstacles. Finally I figure out the secret to jumping, being that you have to lightly press the jump button. Oooooh, ooookay, now I see, the controls are drunk, as was the programmer as he failed to realize that NO OTHER VIDEO GAME has those controls and they are eternally messed up making this game crap as well. It doesn't matter anyways. You can try and try at this game, but then the game will randomly place an obstacle in your path making it impossible to beat. Balls will form right at the beginning to kill you, or 3 big balls all in synchrony will appear to stop you as well. And then there are random bombs that block your way, but of course you don't know where they will appear. But so what if you have to sacrifice one life, because you only live once anyways. That's right, one life and then you die. And then turn off this game. Note: The music makes my ears bleed too.

Time Warp Tickers: The music is actually not that bad here. The graphics are interesting. The game could be fun. But only… Hideous controls again, it's the curse of the Action 52 jump sequence. Anyways, play the game made by a chimp on acid: You play as two fingers walking in a nonsensical world of tiles, floating doors, and random geometric figures that kill you. What happens to two fingers when they die anyways? They turn into “Time?”. Time WHAT?!! Is that asked because even the game is wondering what this game has to do with warping through time? Time to start making good games that makes sense? Time to stop playing this rubbish of a game? “I'll play this game. Time? Never again.”

Jigsaw: And oh boy, it's a puzzle all right. The hardest and most grand scale puzzle that you can possibly fathom: Why does this game not work and crash when you start it too? Even bigger puzzle: Why didn't the programmer test this game to see if one of them EVEN WORKS???!!!! Wait, an even bigger puzzle: Why does this putrid cartridge even exist?!

Ninja Assault: Which will assault you once you play this game. Honestly, one of the better games in this cartridge, because everything works for the most part. But if this game stood out among every NES game made, it would still land as the toilet water among most of the other games out there. You are a ninja that fights other ninjas with a boring ambiance. The redeeming quality of this game that makes it better than most others in this cartridge? The attempt at grunts and screams when you attack enemies will make you laugh.

Robbie N The Robots: Not more bad grammar! You play as Drew Carrey wearing a dress and shoot robots in an ice cave. Pretty linear as all you have to do is press right and shoot. Literally. The whole damn time, that's all you do. So walking and shooting will be a pretty difficult task, are you up for it? Then you will accidentally hit something and die and not want to play anymore. As if you wanted to play this crap-fest to begin with.

Cheetah Men: Finally, the last travesty in this pile of garbage. This game was so revolutionary, it had it's own story which was so good, that you can't skip the minute of it before playing this game! You the gamer(Which your represented by some nerdy kid), gets pulled into this game and has to be rescued by cheetah men! They got a good plot there though, as being in this game is the worst thing I could ever think of. You have to play these big bulky cheetah guys and move around half-assed designed levels that look like Bayou Billie divided in half. Don't even get near a pool of water or you will explode into 4 diamonds. This game is so bad, they actually used it as a plot that you have to save yourself from playing it. Avoid the random sprites pulled from other games, such as the giant Saddam Husseins that make a comeback. Have this be the first game where you actually play long enough to get past the first level. Then give up because yes, this last game sucks too. The end.

There you have it, 52 really awful games, equals one really awful cartridge, which equals probably the worst game to ever exists among the ten thousands of games out there. Enjoy this game for the laugh factors though as that is why this game is fun, to make fun of its stupidity.

Ultimate Rating: 1/10
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Reviewer's Score: 1/10, Originally Posted: 04/07/08

Game Release: Action 52 (US, 1991)