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    Sword Fight Guide by Jerec

    Version: Final | Updated: 01/27/02 | Search Guide | Bookmark Guide

       ____________________________
      /A Jerec Mini FAQ            \
     /______________________________\____________________________________
    | The Curse of Monkey Island                                        |          
              |                     Sword Fight Guide                             |
    |___________________________________________________________________|
    
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    Table of Contents
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    I: Introduction
    II: Version Info
    III: Copyright Info
    IV: Ship to Ship Combat
    V: Normal Insults
    VI: Rottingham Insults
    VII: Credits
    
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    I - Introduction
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    This FAQ is a guide to the Sword Fighting and Ship to Ship combat part of The
    Curse of Monkey Island in Part 3. This is not a guide to the whole game, just a
    quick Sword Fight and Ship Combat guide for those only having trouble with this
    aspect of the game and don't want the plot spoilt by looking up a full
    FAQ/Walkthrough. Enjoy.
    
    
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    II - Version Info
    =====================================================================
    
    1.0, 5/9/2000 : Started FAQ. Insults and comebacks done.
    Final, 1/27/2002 : Made FAQ look more presentable.
    
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    III - Copyright Info
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    This document Copyright 2000-2002 Alex Antonijevic (Jerec). This guide MAY be
    used on your website if no profit is to be gained from it. If it is posted on
    your website, it must remain EXACTLY the same as it is here, all credit to me
    and an email to me telling me where you put. There is no need to steal this
    guide. If you want it on your site, just ask!
    
    My email is jerecis@hotmail.com
    
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    IV - Ship to Ship Combat
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    After having your map stolen by Rottingham you will have to humour the crew in
    a song. Just have some fun with this, as the lyrics are quite enjoyable. Once
    the song is over, it's time to get down to business.
    
    Talk to Haggis about easy fighting or hard fighting. If you choose to have it
    easy "I'd rather let you guys help me out" You will find it only takes one or
    two cannonballs to knock the other ship out of the water. If you decide to have
    it hard. It will take many more cannonballs to knock them down.
    
    Once you have defeated the ship, you get on board to have an insult fight with
    the pirate. At first you won't know the insults, but as you are insulted, you
    will remember them to use later to find the correct comeback. It takes a while,
    but is suggested that you try and get every insult and comeback.
    
    After you defeat a pirate using the insults below, its time to visit Plunder
    Bay where you upgrade your cannons from level one to level two so you can fight
    more powerful pirate ships. Eventually, you will upgrade your cannons through
    beating other pirates so you can buy the Destructomatic T47. You can then fire
    at Captain Rottingham's ship as normal and then beat him by using the correct
    comebacks to his special insults which can be found in Part VI.
    
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    V - Normal Insults
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    Part 3- Normal insults, use these when you are swordfighting against regular
    pirates. You will have to have Guybrush learn them first though. You must use
    the insults to get the comebacks.
    
    <insult> Every enemy I've met I've annihilated!
    <comeback> With your breath, I'm sure they all suffocated.
    
    <insult> You're as repulsive as a monkey in a negligee.
    <comeback> I look THAT much like your fiancée?
    
    <insult> Would you like to be buried or cremated?
    <comeback> With you around, I'd prefer to be fumigated.
    
    <insult> Heaven preserve me! You look like something that's died!
    <comeback> The only way you'll be preserved is in formaldehyde.
    
    <insult> I'll skewer you, like a sow at a buffet.
    <comeback> When I'm done with YOU, you'll be a boneless fillet!
    
    <insult> Killing you would be justifiable homicide.
    <comeback> Then killing you must be justifiable fungicide.
    
    <insult> En garde! Touché!
    <comeback> Oh, that is so cliché!
    
    <insult> Throughout the Caribbean my great deeds are celebrated!
    <comeback> Too bad they're all fabricated.
    
    <insult> When your father first saw you, he must have been mortified.
    <comeback> At least mine can be identified.
    
    <insult> You can't match my witty repartee.
    <comeback> I could, if you would use some breath spray.
    
    <insult> I can't rest until you've been exterminated!
    <comeback> Then perhaps you should switch to decaffeinated.
    
    <insult> You're the ugliest monster ever created.
    <comeback> If you don't count all the ones you've dated.
    
    <insult> I'll leave you devastated, mutilated and perforated.
    <comeback> Your odor alone makes me aggravated, agitated, and infuriated!
    
    <insult> Coming face to face with me must leave you petrified.
    <comeback> Is that your face? I thought it was your backside!
    
    <insult> I'll hound you night and day!
    <comeback> Then be a good dog. Sit! Stay!
    
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    VI - Rottingham Insults
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    When it comes to the time to challenge Rottingham, he will do all the insulting
    with his own insults. It is up to you to find the best comeback from the
    insults/comebacks you have learnt by fighting the other pirates. Just look
    below for the right answers.
    
    <insult> Your stench would make an outhouse cleaner irritated!
    <comeback> Then perhaps you should switch to decaffeinated.
    
    <insult> When I'm done, your body will be rotted and putrefied!
    <comeback> Then killing you must be justifiable fungicide.
    
    <insult> Your lips look as they belong on the catch of the day!
    <comeback> When I'm done with YOU, you'll be a boneless fillet!
    
    <insult> You're a disgrace to your species, you're so undignified!
    <comeback> At least mine can be identified.
    
    <insult> Your looks would make pigs nauseated.
    <comeback> If you don't count all the ones you've dated.
    
    <insult> My attacks have left entire islands depopulated!
    <comeback> With your breath, I'm sure they all suffocated.
    
    <insult> You have the sex appeal of a Shar-Pei.
    <comeback> I look THAT much like your fiancée?
    
    <insult> My skills with a sword are highly venerated.
    <comeback> Too bad they're all fabricated.
    
    <insult> You'll find I'm dogged and relentless to my prey!
    <comeback> Then be a good dog. Sit! Stay!
    
    <insult> I can't tell which of my traits has you the most intimidated.
    <comeback> Your odor alone makes me aggravated, agitated, and infuriated!
    
    <insult> I give you a choice. You can be gutted, or decapitated!
    <comeback> With you around, I'd prefer to be fumigated.
    
    <insult> Nothing can stop me from blowing you away!
    <comeback> I could, if you would use some breath spray.
    
    <insult> I have never lost a mêlée!
    <comeback> You would have, but you were always running away.
    
    <insult> Never before have I faced someone so sissified.
    <comeback> Is that your face? I thought it was your backside!
    
    <insult> Nothing on this earth can save your sorry hide!
    <comeback> The only way you'll be preserved is in formaldehyde.
    
    <insult> Your mother wears a toupee!
    <comeback> Oh, that is so cliché!
    
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    VII - Credits.
    =====================================================================
    Jerec (me) - Author of this FAQ
    CJayC      - Owner of the great site that hosts this FAQ
    Lucasarts  - For making another great adventure game
    
    -EOF-
    
    
    

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