Easter Eggs Guide by fenix down

Version: 1.0 | Updated: 09/14/04 | Printable Version


                           Championship Manager 00/01
                               Easter Eggs Guide
                         By fenix down  aka Harry Shave
                          mail to:  hshave@yahoo.co.uk
                                  Version 1.0


A. Legal Stuff.

B. Intro.

C. Easter Eggs.

              1. Sports Interactive Coach Reports.
                        a. Oliver 'Ov' Collyer.
                        b. Paul Collyer.
                        c. Marlon Davidson.
                        d. Marc Duffy.
                        e. Svein Kvernoey.
                        f. Paul Norman (i).
                        g. Paul Norman (ii).
                        h. Kevin Turner.
                        i. Marc Vaughan.
                        j. Mark Woodger.

              2. Request for Larger Half-Time Oranges.

              3. Female Player.

D. Thanks.

A. Legal Stuff.

I couldn't care less what you do with this guide. If you think that it is
helpful then please feel free to put it on your site, print off copies, email
it to your mates or whatever. You hereby have my permission to carve it up in 
any way you see fit if you wish to add to it. My only request is a small 
acknowledgment in the credits section purely to massage my own ego.

B. Intro.

It is important to note that this is not a guide to CM. There is no element 
to this guide which will enable you to play the game better. This is simply a
list of easter eggs which feature in the game. As such this guide is not that
long, this is not through my own laziness, but much more to do with the fact 
that the makers of the game have always tried to make the CM experience as
realistic as possible. As a result since CM2 (where you could input the names
of international managers as your name to take over the respective nation), 
there are very few cheats. As a result, I would ignore most of what you see on 
gamefaqs and other sites as the cheats are either false (eg unlimited money)
or simply bugs (sign players on free transfers), which tend not to work with
updated forms of the game. In fact the only 'cheat' that is ever in CM is the 
international teams cheat where, when you are picking a team, you select a 
club, then a player, then his nationality and if it is one that can be 
managed during the course of the game natueally, then you will be able to 
select it.

Aside from that, that is it cheat-wise, this is a simulation. The only other
things in the game which might be deemed unnatural are the easter eggs 
contained within this FAQ, that is it. Full stop. I think they are pretty good 
as they give an insight into the programmer's sense of humour as well as 
providing a welcome break from the overriding simulation element to the game.

Anyway here they are.

C. Guide

1. Sports Interactive Coach Reports.

As well as all the real, and made up players in the game, hidden away in 
the bowels of the database are stats for a number of the key programmers and
developers of CM. Unfortunately they are not very good, so don't bother going
in for them under the delusion that they are going to improve your team 
(unless your managing someone languishing at the bottom of the East Svealand
Region of the Swedish Second Division). They are purely there for fun. Once 
you have signed them, leave them for a couple of weeks to settle then get 
one of your coaches to assess them and you will be given a comic, if 
somewhat useless summary of their worth to the club.

You'll have to be quick picking up these players and you can only realistically
do this at the very beginning of a game as players of such a low standing 
retire and regenerate quickly and often as it is very rare that a club will 
come in for them.

N.B. You need only select one coach as, with the exception of Paul Norman, 
all the players only have one assessment.

Below are listed all the SI employees who feature in the game as well as a 
transcript of what the coaches will say about each player.

a. Oliver 'Ov' Collyer: We should tolerate Oliver Collyer's continued abscence
                        from training otherwise we will have no option but to 
                        allow Kevin Turner to play.

b. Paul Collyer:        Whilst [whoever the coach is] has no doubts about Paul
                        Collyer's ability, he thinks it is ulikely he will be
                        available for the next match as his girlfriend wants 
                        help writing a dissertation.

c. Marlon Davidson:     Unavailible for training as he has not returned from 
                        the nightclub he was frequenting last night.

d. Marc Duffy:          Marc Duffy has made a personal request for the words 
                        'Lisa 'n' Marc' to be emblazoned on his shirt rather 
                        than the players name.

e. Svein Kvernoey:      Unfortunately, Svein Kvernoey's deadly aim with a 
                        sponge ball has not transferred onto the football

f. Paul Norman (i):     [Whoever the coach is] is amazed Paul Norman has left
                        his computer bank and ventured into the sunlight for

                        He feels the player is well suited to a permanent role
                        on the substitute's bench.

g. Paul Norman (ii):    Paul Norman is an alien scout attempting to determine
                        whether the earth is ripe for invasion. The F.B.I.
                        have been informed.

h. Kevin Turner:        [Whoever the coach is] is amazed at the distance
                        Kevin Turner can punt a ball when attempting to 
                        control it.

                        He is trying to maximise the potential this player has
                        by loaning him to the local Rugby Club.

i. Marc Vaughan:        Marc Vaughan is more suited to watching football at 
                        this level than playing it.

j. Mark Woodger:        [Whoever the coach is] is recommending a high fat diet
                        for Mark Woodger, as he feels that if there was more 
                        of him to block the goalmouth then it may help his
                        match performances.

2. Request for larger Half-Time Oranges.

This easter egg can only be found whilst playing an actual match, and 
unfortunately was removed in later updates of the game. To see this special
screen you need to do the following things:

1. Pause a live match.

2. Go to Board Request.

3. Without doing anything on the board request screen, open up another screen
   (eg team screen).

4. Close the screen you have just opened so that you return to the board 
   request screen.

5. Click OK in the bottom right WITHOUT highlighting any request.

6. If this has worked you should see that you have news.

7. Go to News.

8. You should see the following message:

                         Board Reaction to Request.
The board dismiss your request for larger half-time oranges but stress that
they will inform you immediately if the situation changes.

Quite amusing!

3. Female Players.

Although professional football is a man's game the probgrammers of CM 00/01
managed to sneak in a woman into one of the teams.

How to find her:

Type 'Laura Gilogly' into the find player screen. This should bring up one 
player, who plays for East Stirlingshire in the Scottish football league.

N.B. You might want to run a Scottish league if you are not using maximum
database and / or running a league from the British Isles, as East
Stirlingshire are a bit rubbish (ie they are at the bottom of the Third 
division, where they have been for months, and are getting caned on a 
regular basis by their fellow minnows).

Now, Laura was not placed into the game simply to have a secret woman, nor
because she was the girlfriend of one of the programmers, but for a much more
amusing reason.

Apparently, one of the programmers was talking with an East Stirling fan who 
was bemoaning the current plight of his beloved club. So bad did he think 
that the current crop of players were that he felt the team would perform 
better with their female Physiotherapist in the side. Consequently Laura 
Gilogly found herself off the bench and into the playing staff.

This little joke caused some consternation amongst the board of Directors at
East Stirling (though you'd have thought the men in charge of such an appaling 
club would know how to take a joke), who complained vigorously and as a result
the story made several national newspapers, including that august journal of
opinion, The Sun!

Occasionally, during later stages of the game, you may find other 'female' 
players pop up as regens, but these are not deliberate. I presume this is down
to the fact that names are split into two seperate databases (Christian and
surnames). There are probably a handful of other non-playing female staff
lurking (Karen Brady springs to mind) and the computer doesn't differentiate 
by sex.

D. Thanks.

www.champmaniacs.de : Jez has put together an awesome collection of Strange
                      Happenings. You should definitely check it out if you 
                      want to see the Twilight Zone of CM. It's cool cos it's
                      in German and English.