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    Secrets FAQ by evil_Vasile

    Version: 1.0 | Updated: 10/20/12 | Printable Version | Search This Guide

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       _____) ) ____| |   | | |_| | |_| |___ |   _____) ) ___ | | | |   _____) )
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      _   | |/ _ \ \ /\ / / _ \ |  / _ \|  _| | __| '_ \ / _ \ | . ` | | |/ _ \
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      \____/ \___| \_/\_/ \___|_|  \___/|_|    \__|_| |_|\___| |_| \_|_|_|\___|
    
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    A guide to Secrets and Egyptian Tablets by evil_Vasile.
    
    WARNING!                        SPOILERS AHEAD!                        WARNING!
    WARNING!        Are you sure this is the path you wish to take?        WARNING!
    
    
    /=============================================================================\
    |                              Table of contents                              |
    \=============================================================================/
    
    Section [INTRO]: Introduction
    =============================
    
    Section [SJOTN]: Secrets
    ========================
    [SJOTN01] - Level 01 - Gathering of Gods
    [SJOTN02] - Level 02 - Together Forever
    [SJOTN03] - Level 03 - Born Again
    
    Section [TJOTN]: Egyptian tablets
    =================================
    [TJOTN01] - Level 01 - Gathering of Gods
    [TJOTN02] - Level 02 - Together Forever
    [TJOTN03] - Level 03 - Born Again
    
    Seciton [ESTRY]: Egyptian History
    =================================
    [ESTRY01] - The tablet text from the base game
    [ESTRY02] - The tablet text fromt he JOTN DLC
    
    Section [CRDTS]: Credits
    ========================
    
    /=============================================================================\
    |                                Introduction                                 |
    \=============================================================================/
    
    -> Copyright bullshit: Feel free to post this guide wherever you feel like;
    please do respect that I did spend some time writing this and give me some
    credit though. 
    
    -> Note: This time around I'm also including the coordinates for the secrets
    and the tablets. To view them in game type "hud_bShowCoords = 1" in the
    console. (The console is accesed using the tilde '~' key by default.)
    
    -> If you find any significant mistakes (I might have confused left for right
    and viceversa) or find something to be too ambiguous, contact me at
    evil.vasile<at>gmail. Mention Serious Sam BFE in the subject or it's very
    likely that I'll consider it spam. "I'm selling these fine leather jackets" is
    also an acceptable subject.
    
    /=============================================================================\
    |[SJOTN]              Serious Sam: BFE - JOTN - Secrets                       |
    \=============================================================================/
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    |[SJOTN01] - Level 1 - Gathering of Gods                            8 Secrets |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    ->Secret 01: From where you start, head to the set of stairs that go along the
    hillside. At the bottom of these stairs there are some crates sitting 
    suspiciously against the hillside. Destroy them and enter the cave. (Hehehe!) 
    You might want some firepower first.
    [Coords: 35/0/119]
    
    ->Secret 02: As you climb up the stairs, you'll pick up the pistol from a
    tiket booth stand or some sort of shack. On it's roof is a secret +50 Health 
    kit. You can either climb on it by jumping on the fence near it and then 
    jumping on the door, or by climbing the small building to the right using the 
    dumpster and then jumping from roof to roof to the secret Health Kit.
    [Coords: 11/7/143]
    
    ->Secret 03: From the last secret, advance to the tree line and look to your
    left. There is a long wall here that you can climb. Climb it and follow it to
    the end to reach a secret +100 Health Kit!
    [Coords: 27/11/33]
    
    ->Secret 04: From the secret Health Kit above, turn left to face the water and
    head straight ahead to the beach. You should notice a red baloon-thing floating
    in the water. Swim to it and then swim down for a secret Rocket Launcher!
    You can also just stick to the water from the starting area and head about
    half-way along the left side beach to reach the floating red thing.
    [Coords: -128/-8/35]
    
    ->Secret 05: Using the secret Rocket Launcher, or the Rocket Launcher that you
    get at some point during normal progression, go to where you turned left and
    climbed the wal to reach Secret 03. Now turn right instead and blow up the
    rocks here and jump down into the cave for some secret Electricity Ammo!
    Note: There are two groups of rocks on the right, the secret is under the
    bigger group. Also there are some planks barely noticeable under the rocks
    leading to the secret.
    [Coords: 39/5/79]
    
    ->Secret 06: Swim to the nearest small island on the right side of the, uhm...
    the big island... You'll notice a canon just standing there. I guess there's no
    harm in SECRETLY using the canon?
    [Coords: 313/0/179]
    
    ->Secret 07: On the far side of the island opposite from where you start, to
    the left, there's a ruined structure where you get the Osiris Statue. Destroy
    the right most column of this structure for some secret Rocket Ammo!
    [Coords: -43/11/175]
    
    ->Secret 08: At about the middle of the right side beach, look for a secret
    Wilson the Volleyball - a reference to the movie Cast Away. It should be at
    about 10-15 feet from the water or so. The easiest way to find it is probably
    to go towards the water from the structure where you pick up the Hathor Statue.
    [Coords: 81/0/-18]
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    |[SJOTN02] - Level 2 - Together Forever                             4 Secrets |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    ->Secret 01: From the starting area swim along the right cliffside until you
    find a cave. Enter the cave (obviously) and climb the ladder you find here to
    find a secret Canon!
    [Coords: Cave: 406/-8/-1381; Secret: 432/0/-1375]
    
    ->Secret 02: After climbing up from the dock, stick to the left side cliff and
    advance until you reach a wall and can't advance any further. There should be
    a door you can destroy here to find a secretly pissed off kamikazee. Don't
    worry, he won't hurt you.
    [Coords: 513/0/-1255]
    
    ->Secret 03: When you enter the destroyed military compound, as you stand in
    front of the main gate that was locked before getting the key, go to the tower
    to your right and climb the dumpster. From the dumpster you can climb a broken
    ladder to a secret Minigun!
    [Coords: 429/9/-894]
    
    ->Secret 04: Between the ruined temple with the puzzles and the ruined temple
    where the level ends, there's a secret underground room near the cliff wall.
    You'll find here a secret Legend of The Beast reference.
    [Coords: -80/2/-1175]
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    |[SJOTN03] - Level 3 - Born Again                                   7 Secrets |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    ->Secret 01: After exiting the tomb, jump down into the water to find a Secret
    Minigun!
    [Coords: 30/4/-93]
    
    ->Secret 02: In the area with the jetpack, check behind the ruined building,
    around where it meets the cliff there are Health/Armor/Ammo items hidden
    behind a rock. Fly around the rear of the ruined building and you should spot
    the glowing items.
    [Coords: 82/24/-155]
    
    ->Secret 03: After getting the jetpack, return to the starting area outside the
    tomb/cave. From where you exited the cave, head right and climb the cliffs
    to reach a secret Canon!
    [Coords: -50/49/-50]
    
    ->Secret 04: After jumping over the dam, when you reach the powerplant
    building where you get the key that unlocks the big pipe, check behind the 
    structure left of the red pipes for a secret key. When going to the pipe to
    advance to the next area, use the secret key to open up the tunnel left of the
    big pipe for some secret ammo (Canon balls included, hehe.)
    [Coords: Key: 303/5/303; Tunnel: 149/10/265]
    
    ->Secret 05: After sliding down the pipe, just as you reach the ground QUICKLY
    shoot the kamikazee running on top of the first bridge you see. You only have a
    few seconds, if you fail to kill him reload an earlier save and try again.
    Advance and you'll trigger the Secret Revenge of the Kamikazee!
    [Coords: Bridge: 209/24/412]
    
    ->Secret 06: In the final area, head straight ahead to the middle of it all.
    To your left and right should be two huge structures, some sort of ruined
    pylons or something. The inner faces of these things can be climbed to reach 
    two hidden switches. It is kind of tricky; for the structure on the right, 
    while facing it start climbing towards it's right side, then when you can't
    climb any more jump over to the left side, repeat the process a few times until
    you're at the top of the stone blocks and can see the switch; face the left
    structure and repeat the same process. After you pull both switches, a secret
    teleporter will spawn between the two ruined structures. Jump in and you'll
    be teleported to the start of the map. After you're done enjoying the secret,
    another teleporter will spawn to take you back to the final arena.
    [Coords: Switch 1: 217,11,1003; Switch 2: 252/12/1003]
    
    ->Secret 07: In the final area, simply go to the end opposite to the
    entrance and search around the bushes for some Secret Armor.
    [Coords: 197/-4/1363]
    
    
    /=============================================================================\
    |[TJOTN]              Serious Sam: BFE - Egyptian Tablets                     |
    \=============================================================================/
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    |[TJOTN01] - Level 1 - Gathering of Gods                            2 Tablets |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    ->Tablet 01: "When Nefertari gave Ramses his firstborn son Amunhirkopshef, the
    gods endowed the child with such strength of body and mind that no man has ever
    enjoyed."
    
    Location: Inside the room where you place the five statues, it rests against
    the wall opposite to the entrance. (Hard to miss)
    [Coords: -26/6/-62]
    
    ->Tablet 02: "No matter what a father says, a mother will always love her son.
    The seal of your god shall guard the tomb of your doom."
    
    Location: Beneath the temple at the top of the stairs leading down to the
    alien room with the first statue. (Hard to miss)
    [Coords: 17/-20/20]
    
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    |[TJOTN02] - Level 2 - Together Forever                             3 Tablets |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    ->Tablet 03: "Murderer of a prince is to be condemned, but his hand was led by
    the gods. Thus he may walk among us but he shall not be named."
    
    Location: Just to the right of the entrance of the first temple in the cliff;
    the one where you exit the level.
    [Coords: 1/6/-1079]
    
    ->Tablet 04: "It is sad for a father to bury his son, but even more so for a
    son to raise a hand against his father."
    
    Location: In the first temple in the cliffside, walk straight ahead from the
    entrance and you should run into it. (Just before the room where the level
    ends after placing the statue; should be hard to miss.)
    [Coords: -37/5/-1032]
    
    ->Tablet 05: "The love of Ramses and Nefertari was so great that even the gods
    looked up to them in admiration."
    
    Location: In the second temple, after you complete all the puzzles, at the foot
    of the altar where you pickup Nefertari's statue. (Really hard to miss, heh)
    [Coords: -177/12/-1284]
    
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    |[TJOTN03] - Level 3 - Born Again                                   7 Secrets |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    ->Tablet 06: "I am Amunhirkopshef, Fanbearer on the King's Right Hand, Royal
    Scribe, Commander of the Troops, Wielder of the Arrow. I bring freedom and
    prosperity to all Egypt."
    
    Location: In the underground starting tomb, after exiting the first room,
    instead of turning right to exit, turn left and you'll see the tablet.
    [Coords: 128/-8/-83]
    
    ->Tablet 07: "I am Amunhirkopshef, Whisperer to the Oracle, Wielder of the
    Arrow, Commander of the Troops. By my powers, Egypt rules the known world."
    
    Location: In the middle of the final arena, as you're advancing from where you
    entered the area, stop just before reaching the huge ruined wall-like
    structures there. Face left and you should see the tablet at the foot of the
    ruined left-side structure.
    [Coords: 244/-4/999]
    
    ->Tablet 08: "Amun gives strength to the poor and needy. Seth gives strength
    to the mighty and powerful. Thus, from this day I shall be known as
    Sethirkopshef."
    
    Location: From the entrance to the underground chambers, face right and head
    straight ahead towards the cliffs. If you did this right, by the time you
    reach the cliff you should see the tablet resting against the cliff-wall to 
    your left. If not, simply follow the cliff-side until you find it.
    [Coords: 101/0/1120]
    
    ->Tablet 09:  "I am Sethirkopshef, Master of the Oracle, Wielder of the Arrow.
    Fear me father, for my reign shall reach to the stars and beyond."
    
    Location: When reaching the underground entrance, the tablet is there just
    above the underground gate. So instead of going down the stairs go around them
    to find the tablet.
    [Coords: 235/-4/1140]
    
    ->Tablet 10: "I am the Oracle. My allegiance is to the gods alone.
    From this day forward, I shall sleep in the tabernacle and shall wake for no
    one, save a child of true love."
    
    Location: After descending the stairs, just before entering the underground
    chambers, look to your left to find the final tablet.
    [Coords: 237/-33/1213]
    
    
    /=============================================================================\
    |[ESTRY]              Serious Sam: BFE - Egyptian History                     |
    \=============================================================================/
    
    Note: I've included here the texts from both the base game and the DLC.
    
    I've arranged the tablets in order of their editor id. I'm guessing this is how
    they're supposed to go to form a coherent story.
    
    If you're interested in the Backstory to the original Serious Sam games, you
    can read more about it on http://www.seriouszone.com/ssgold/festory.php or
    discuss it on the forums on the same site.
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    | [ESTRY01] Tablets from the base game:                                       |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    <01> On the Boat of Sun they came. Osiris was at the helm, Anubis and Horus at
    his side.
    <02> I am Osiris. My word is truth. I came across the sea of stars to free you
    from your destitution.
    <03> I am Horus. My face is that of a divine falcon. I am the ruler of the
    House of Life.
    <04> I am Anubis. My face is that of a divine jackal. I am the ruler of the
    House of Death.
    <05> There is one that sees what no man sees; Knows what no man knows. One that
    commands all doors, one that commands all Boats. It is the Oracle.
    <06> O, you who builds pyramids; You who propels the Boat of Sun; You who
    strikes our enemies with the Arrow. You are Ra the powerful.
    <07> The Oracle saw the foes of Osiris across the sea of stars. Thus, Osiris
    climbed the Boat of Sun.
    <08> Osiris said to his sons: You shall rule the realm of men. You shall wield
    the light of Ra. But you shall not wake the Boat of Million of Years.
    <09> Then, Osiris sailed out across the sea of stars. But he never returned.
    <10> The Oracle said: The gods shall perish and men shall rule the Earth again.
    But men shall forget the words of gods.
    <11> The Oracle said: Men shall build the Boat of Sun and sail across the sea
    of stars. But they shall awake the wrath of One Infinite.
    <12> The Oracle said: The foes of Osiris shall bring destruction upon the
    realms of men. And the Boat of Millions of Years shall have to be awoken.
    <13> And it was said that when the time comes for the Boat of Millions of Years
    to awake, Ra shall bind himself by an oath to give his two Eyes.
    <14> Anubis took the Eye of Moon and placed it on his throne in the great
    darkness. And said to the Oracle: Only Him who has the knowledge may enter.
    <15> Horus took the Eye of Sun and placed it on his throne in the great deep.
    And said to the Oracle: Only Him who has the knowledge may enter.
    <16> The gods have perished. And men built great temples on their graves. Only
    the Oracle has remained.
    <17> The Oracle said: Build me the tabernacle and I shall give you the power to
    wield the arrow.
    <18> And by the words of the Oracle, Khufu built the tabernacle. And the Oracle
    saw the work of Khufu and it was content.
    <19> And thus, Khufu took possession of the property of Horus which belonged to
    Osiris. And gave oath to protect it forever.
    <20> As the Oracle dwelled with the gods, the throne in the Boat of Millions of
    Years was empty.
    <21> I, Khufu, son of Sneferu, bind my son to wield the Arrow. Because his is
    the reign of Egypt, and of his son, and son of his son.
    <22> Khafra, heir of Khufu, saw the death that was done in the name of Horus.
    And Khafra felt that Horus was sad.
    <23> The Arrow shall be returned to the shrine and shall rest in peace with my
    ancestors, from this day forth.
    <24> Khafra told the Lion to sit. And the Lion was seated. And no man could
    move it. It is from this day that the light of Ra has not blazed from the
    Arrow.
    <25> It was said that when the time comes, one who has knowledge shall bring
    forth the Arrow and the seals shall open.
    <26> The Oracle shall say unto Him: Thou, who knowest the name of this door,
    knowest thou the names of the seals that guard it?
    
    
    My interpretation: 
    - The tablets tell a short story of how, in the game universe, the ancient 
    Egyptian Gods were actually the aliens known as Sirians. They came with their
    alien ship, fleeing from Mental and brought mankind some sweet alien-tech. 
    - The Oracle then fortold of mankind discovering space-travel and awaking 
    Mental's wrath (The One Infinite). The foes of osiris, aka Mental's minions,
    then bring destruction upon Earth so humanity, by which I mean Sam, has to go
    back in time, find the alien ship (See Serious Sam: TFE) and stop Mental from 
    destroying the Earth.
    - Sam is the 'chosen one', the 'one who has knowledge' (Knowledge of blowing
    things up, hehehe!). He does indeed 'bring forth the Arrow' (The Arrow being
    the Sirian Bracelet aka Sirian Mutilator) and open the ancient seals with it.
    
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    | [ESTRY02] Tablets from the DLC:                                             |
    >-----------------------------------------------------------------------------<
    
    <01> I am the Oracle. My allegiance is to the gods alone. From this day
    forward, I shall sleep in the tabernacle and shall wake for no one, save a
    child of true love.
    <02> The love of Ramses and Nefertari was so great that even the gods looked
    up to them in admiration.
    <03> When Nefertari gave Ramses his firstborn son Amunhirkopshef, the gods
    endowed the child with such strength of body and mind that no man has ever
    enjoyed.
    <04> I am Amunhirkopshef, Fanbearer on the King's Right Hand, Royal Scribe,
    Commander of the Troops, Wielder of the Arrow. I bring freedom and prosperity
    to all Egypt.
    <05> I am Amunhirkopshef, Whisperer to the Oracle, Wielder of the Arrow,
    Commander of the Troops. By my powers, Egypt rules the known world.
    <06> Amun gives strength to the poor and needy. Seth gives strength to the
    mighty and powerful. Thus, from this day I shall be known as Sethirkopshef.
    <07> I am Sethirkopshef, Master of the Oracle, Wielder of the Arrow. Fear me
    farther, for my reign shall reach to the stars and beyond.
    <08> Murderer of a prince is to be condemned, but his hand was led by the
    gods. Thus he may walk among us but he shall not be named.
    <09> It is sad for a father to bury his son, but even more so for a son to
    raise a hand against his father.
    <10> No matter what a father says, a mother will always love her son. The seal
    of your god shall guard the tomb of your doom.
    
    My interpretation:
    - Unlike the first set of tablets, which expand/explain the game story, these
    tablets are somewhat more faithful to actual history.
    - Amunhirkopshef, in actuality Amun-her-khepeshef (meaning "Amun Is with His
    Right Arm"), was indeed the son of Ramsses II and Nefertari. He does at some 
    point change his name to Seth-her-khepeshef. [1] I don't really know if there
    is any truth to him 'raising a hand against his father', but then again
    I'm no history buff.
    
    [1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amun-her-khepeshef
    
    
    
    /=============================================================================\
    |[CRDTS]                           Credits                                    |
    \=============================================================================/
    
    - Croteam, for being awesome and making the game!
    
    - patorjk, for making an awesome ascii text art converter that I used for the
    title of this guide - http://patorjk.com/software/taag/