Walkthrough by TheMightyRoast

Version 1.0, Last Updated 2012-11-05

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About the game

This is an Xbox Live Indie Game (XBLIG). It is available to download either from your XBox 360 dashboard or from www.xbox.com. At the time of writing the full game is 80 Microsoft Points and you can download the trial version for free.

It is also available on the PC and Mac too.

From the blurb on the Xbox website:

What happens when DLC goes too far? Defeat the bad guy, save the world and get the girl! But first you'll need to find coins to buy DLC to enable animation, sound and even pausing.

And before the game begins, you'll get the following disclaimer explaining pretty much what the game is all about too:

DISCLAIMER!

This game is satire. There is no actual downloadable content. Everything is purchased using in-game coins. So have fun, yeah?

About Me

My name is Tim Roast (XBOX 360 gamertag: TheMightyRoast). All my guides are listed on GAMEFAQS at:

http://www.gamefaqs.com/users/tim_roast/contributions/faqs

I can be contacted via email at tjr10 [at] h o t m a i l . c o . u k (Replace the [at] with @ and remove all the spaces).

Main Menu

The options here are:

  • Start New Game/Continue Game
  • Awardments
  • Options
  • Credits
  • Quit to Dashboard/Save and Quit to Dashboard

Under options you can change the music volume and SFX volume levels.

Walkthrough

SPOILER ALERT: This guide contains spoilers. It is recommended you have a go at the game before referring to this guide.


You and the princess at the start of the game

The start of the game sees you and your horse at one side of the screen facing the princess on the other side of the screen. Along comes a bad guy who whisks the princess away. An arrow then pops up pointing in the direction the bad guy just left in saying Motivation. So that is your goal in the game, to catch the bad guy and rescue the princess. Trouble is the way these game companies are with DLC (which is short for downloadable content although you probably knew that already) these days you're probably going to have to purchase a lot of DLC to do it. As the next pop-up window proves:

Welcome to DLC Quest! You might notice some missing features, like animation, sound, and moving to the left.

Nothing a little DLC can't solve! Talk to the shopkeep!

So you can only head right to start with. You can't even jump. On the way you'll pick up 4 coins (coins 1-4) and meet the shopkeep who goes by the name of Nickel:

Nickel:

That bad guy just stole Princess MacGuffin! You have the rescue her!

Also, he murdered your uncle! You must get revenge!

I think he might have peed in the town's water supply too!

... that seems a bit less important now.

Buy some DLC and get going! You'll need it!

The store will then pop up showing you all available DLC (by clicking RT you will see all your purchased DLC, of which you won't have any yet, use LT to get back to see the items of DLC you have yet to purchase).

You have four coins so the only DLC pack you can afford is the Movement Pack so purchase it.

This gives you the ability to move left, and to jump. Keep heading right for now and collect 10 more coins (coins 5-14). You'll reach a couple of signs. The first says:

Bad guy went that way -->

Whilst the second one next to a bush says:

Thick bushes can be cut with a sword.

So that blocks that way off at this stage as you don't have a sword. Therefore head up a couple of platforms to collect 5 more coins (coins 15-19) plus a hidden DLC pack called Armor for your Horse Pack, which is next to a sign that says:

All DLC is purchased from the shopkeep

So even though you collected that DLC you still need to purchase it. However you won't be able to afford it yet.

Head left which takes you to your horse who you can talk to:

Hoarice: Neigh!

Player: (...)

Hoarice: Neigh!

Just to the left of him is another guy you can talk to:

Blacksmith: Need a sword to chop down some bushes?

Player: Yes! The fate of the world rests on me!

Blacksmith: You'll need to sharpen it on this grindstone. About 10,000 turns should do it I think.

So start grinding and a new DLC pack will become available, the Time is Money Pack. You'll also see a bar at the top slowly filling up with blue as you grind. Once the blue bar is full your sword will be sharp enough to use. However it'll take ages. Instead talk to the blacksmith again:

Blacksmith: Keep grinding. You'll get that sword eventually!

Player: (...)

Blacksmith: I bet there's some DLC you could buy to save yourself the grind...

Hmmm, that might be an idea.

But first head left past the grindstone. There are five signs here with five coins above them (coins 20-24). The signs read (in order):

Created by Going Loud Studios

Follow us at @wearegoingloud

www.goingloudstudios.com

This isn't breaking your immersion. Is it?

Sorry

Head left some more and you'll reach a shepherd.

Shepherd: I hope nobody attacks my sheep. I've let them wander around freely.

Player: Hadn't even considered it.

Shepherd: Player.

Player: Shepherd.

Now that he has planted in your head the idea of killing his sheep you may want to do this. Indeed it is tied in with one of the Awardments, in particular the one titled Anything for an awardment where you need to kill all the sheep and NPCs in the game.

Head down the hole beside the shepherd. In there is a sheep next to a sign:


Sheep 1

Please don't hurt the sheep.

-Shepherd

You'll want to kill this sheep once you have your sword.

There are also 5 coins down here (coins 25-29).

Head back up and to platforms above the shepherd to get 21 more coins (coins 30-50).

Then go back to ground level and head left again. You'll reach another sign:

Warning!

Reports of strange encounters in the area!

Keep heading left and the screen will go all funny as you experience that strange encounter. A new character will have appeared. Speak to him:

Random: Dun dun dunnnn!

Player: What was that!

Random: Whenever I encounter someone, the screen does that. Sorry.

Player: Can you let me pass?

Random: Never!

Player: ...

Random: You'll never outsmart me! Hahaha!

Following that encounter a new DLC pack will become available to purchase called Psychological Warfare Pack.

Head right and get the DLC you can afford from the shopkeep. This will include the Time is Money Pack. Now grind your sword again and this time it will become sharp very quickly so that it can be used to cut down bushes, at last (and also to kill sheep if you are that way inclined). Collect 6 more coins to the left of here, just past the shepherd, that you couldn't access before as the bushes blocked your way to them (coins 51-56). (And you can also kill the sheep here too; as mentioned above he is in the hole here.)


Sheep 2

Now head all the way right. Slice through the thick bush and head right. You'll see an inaccessible area above you where there are coins. As you pass you will automatically unlock a new DLC to purchase called Double Jump Pack. So that's how you'll up there then, but first head right still and kill the sheep.

Heading right there is a sign next to a hole:

Caution! Drop!

Drop down there collecting 6 coins (coins 57-62). There is a sign at the bottom:

That first step was a doozy

Now to the left here you will see that the wall has a gap in its outline. This is a hidey-hole. Go inside and this will lead to another sheep to kill plus 10 more coins (coins 63-72).


Sheep 3

The sign here tells you what the coins are doing here:

Secret stash! Don't touch!

Don't listen to that sign.

Head out again and explore the rest of the underground area collecting 6 more coins (coins 73-78), and another tunnel with a couple of signs in it:

Dead end

No really, just turn back

That actually contains 20 more coins through the hidey-hole (coins 79-98).

Head up top again to collect 12 more coins (coins 99-110), and speak to the character standing there:

Smith: Hi. I don't have anything relevant to say at the current time.

Player: What?

Smith: I'll play an important role soon, but you don't "know" that yet.

Head right of him to examine some trees and you'll get a pop-up:

You require DLC.

The forest is very dense. You will need a map to access the other side!

And a new DLC pack will be available to purchase called Map Pack. Now head left again back to the shopkeep. You will be able to purchase just the one DLC, the Psychological Warfare Pack will be the only one you can afford, so purchase it.

Then head left to meet Random again.

Random: Dun dun dun dunnnn!

Random : Wait, is that the limited edition psychological warfare pack?

Player: Sure is.

Random: Available only as a pre-order exclusive?

Player: Yup.

Random: ... Can I have it?

Player: Will you leave me alone?

Random: Deal!

Talk to him again if you want:

Random: I don't even know why I wanted that pack. I just had to have it.


Sheep 4

Now you can head past him collecting 9 coins (coins 111-119) before heading underground to collect 91 more coins (coins 120-210, including some in three hidey-hole areas), and to kill one sheep.

There is also a character here to talk to:

Phil: I'm a filler NPC. I have nothing to contribute to the situation at hand.

Player: Heh.

Player: You're kidding, right?

Phil: I don't even know how I got down here.

And there is a hidden DLC pack here to just above a sign that says:

There's a treasure up there. I can see it! But I can't reach it.


Sheep 5 and 6

Sheep 7

So you'll need to come back when you have the double jump DLC. Which you may as well purchase now so you can get the hidden DLC pack: Pet Pack.

Then head back up top and climb to the left using your double jump to get all the goodies up here, the 69 coins (coins 211-279), another hidden DLC pack (Top Hat Pack) and the three sheep (note the two hidey-holes to get all the coins and sheep).

There is also another non-playable character to speak to up here:

Old Man: Hey! Hero! Over here!

Player: What...? My name isn't hero.

Old Man: Thank goodness you came hero! I need your help. Wolves have been stealing children from the village!

Player: I...

Old Man: Also, I lost my enchanted book of spells.

Player: Wait, wolves? Children?

Hero: And I can't find my fishing rod!

Player: Whoa, whoa! Enchanted? Fishing rod?

Old man: No, it's just a normal fishing rod. But it's lucky!

Old man: You must rescue the children, recover the enchanted book and find my fishing rod!

Player: I... You know what? No. Just no. I don't even know you. Solve your own problems. I'm busy.

Also note the sign here telling you:

There's nothing plot centric over here. The bad guy went East, remember?


Sheep 8

Once all goodies are collected head right again. On the way you can head up the platforms above the shepherd's head and double jump off the small one furthermost to the right to end up on a platform with a sheep on it to kill.


Sheep 9

Also on the way right once you pass the bit where you couldn't double-jump up before. Well now you have double jump so head on up and collect the 96 coins (coins 280-375), plus kill the three sheep, collect the hidden DLC pack (Sexy Outfits Pack) which is through a hidey-hole, and maybe even send an email after reading the sign there:

Feedback? Email Ben@goingclouds.com


Sheep 10

Sheep 11

Now visit the shopkeeper and buy the DLC you can afford which will include the Map Pack. Using that you can head right again and examine the forest once more. Now you have the map you can head across to the other side.

On the other side there are 18 coins (coins 376-393) and a guy standing there who looks like the shopkeep Nickel from the other side of the forest:

Dime: Buy your DLC here!

Player: You look familiar...

Dime: Perhaps you've met my long-lost brother!

Maybe you have.


Sheep 12

Sheep 13

Now head right again and collect all the coins above ground, plus kill the 2 sheep, before heading underground and collect all the coins here too. This will collect you 419 more coins (coins 394-812) by the time you reach the sign:

Badguy hideout ahead.

There are a further 13 coins here now (coins 813-825) and these are the final set of coins in the game so if you have collected them the awardment At least it's not stamps will unlock.

Then you come across the next sign:

Beware of troll

Also up the wall here is a hidey-hole with a DLC pack in it called The Zombie Pack. This is the last hidden DLC pack to find in the game so if you have found them all you will get the awardment Catch them all.

Keep going right and there is another sign:

No solicitors

Seeing as you haven't taken the hint yet keep going right and you'll meet the troll. Try and kill him with your sword:

Troll: Hahaha! I didn't even feel that!

Player: Uh oh. I'm going to need a better weapon...

Troll: Problem?

Fortunately this unlocks a new DLC pack called Gun Pack so it shouldn't be a problem (unless you got no coins) so go back to the shopkeep and purchase the Gun Pack. Note: You can also now afford to purchase the Armor for your Horse Pack but there are two different endings to this game, one without the horse armor equipped, and one with it equipped, so if you want to see both don't purchase this DLC yet.

Now you have the Gun Pack it will say that you need to redeem it from the gunsmith and if you recall at the other side of the forest was a guy who didn't have an important role to play in the game yet. Well guess what - he does now.

Head to the forest and examine:

You require DLC.

It's now night time in the forest. You will need to buy the night version of the map to access the other side!

And you get a pop up telling you the next DLC pack, Night Map Pack, is available to purchase. So go back to the shopkeep and purchase yet more DLC.

Once purchased use the night map to get through the forest and talk to the gunsmith:

Smith: Player! Now that you've purchased the Gun DLC Pack, I have a weapon for you!

Smith: Be careful where you point it!

That last sentence of his is significant because now you have the gun you can kill the human NPCs. If you kill them all, plus all the sheep, then you'll get the Anything for an awardment awardment. And don't worry if you still have DLC to buy. If you kill the shopkeeps then you can still speak to them:

Nickel: I might be dead, but there's still DLC to buy!

Player: What?!

Nickel: Try not to think about the logistics.

But before you start your killing spree get back to the story by heading over to where the troll was and use your new weapon to kill him.

Once you have slayed the troll you can pass the area. The credits will then roll because you have finished the game. However a new DLC pack will become available too called the Finish the Fight Pack. So if you want to view the actual ending to the game then you need to purchase the DLC. From the Main Menu choose to Continue Game and buy the DLC from the shopkeep.

Now head back to the end area, and this time instead of the credits rolling you will come to an area where the bad guy is with the princess:

Player: Got you now! Release the princess!

You shoot him once:

Bad guy: Hahahaha! That was pathetic! How do you expect them to make a sequel if you killed the bad guy? I however have no problem killing you.

Your faithful steed Hoarice then appears in front of you to protect you.

Player: Horse!!

Your horse starts to gallop towards the bad guy. Bad guy then shoots a gun and one of two endings plays out:

The bad ending: If the Armor for your Horse Pack DLC is not equipped then the shot will instantly kill your horse. The bad guy then shoots again and you die and the credits roll whilst the bad guy runs away carrying the princess high above his head.

After this ending you need to choose to continue game from the main menu, purchase the Armor for your Horse Pack and go back to face the bad guy to get the good ending:

The good ending: If the Armor for your Horse Pack DLC is equipped then the shot the bad guy fired at you will hit the horse's armor. The horse will then continue his gallop up to the bad guy before raising his hind legs to give him a fatal kick. The princess will then give a speech:

Princess: My hero!

And the credits will roll as the princess runs off with the hero (who happens to be Hoarice the horse - well it was he that saved her after all).

Pause Menu Pack

Availability: Available for purchase at the start.

Price: 5 coins

Description: Need a break? Purchase this pack to gain full control over time itself. Sort of. There are no refunds for this item.

Animation Pack

Availability: Available for purchase at the start.

Price: 5 coins

Description: Purchase this pack and experience the difference that moving images make! There are no refunds for this item.

Movement Pack

Availability: Available for purchase at the start.

Price: 4 coins

Description: Experience next gen control! Features jumping and moving left. There are no refunds for this item.

Audio Pack

Availability: Available for purchase at the start.

Price: 5 coins

Description: A whole new sense to experience! There are no refunds for this item.

Armor for your Horse Pack

Availability: This hidden DLC pack can be found on a platform just above the shopkeep called Nickel.

Price: 250 coins

Description: Shiny armor for your horse! There are no refunds for this item.

Time is Money Pack

Availability: This becomes available to purchase once you have spoken to the blacksmith and begun grinding the blunt sword he gave you on the grindstone.

Price: 20 coins

Description: Can't stand the grind? Purchase this pack to get 1000x grinding speed! There are no refunds for this item.

Psychological Warfare Pack

Availability: After you speak to Random to the right of your map this will become available to purchase.

Price: 50 coins

Description: Exclusive pre-order DLC for the hot new game! There are no refunds for this item.

Double Jump Pack

Availability: After you cut through the thick bush that leads to the right head a little further right and there is an area above that can only be accessed using double jump. The DLC will now be available to purchase upon coming to this area.

Price: 100 coins

Description: We heard you like jumping, so we put a jump in your jump, so you can jump while you jump. There are no refunds for this item.

Map Pack

Availability: After you head right to examine a forest area for the first time this will be available for purchase.

Price: 140 coins

Description: Some companies give away maps for free. Not us. There are no refunds for this item.

Pet Pack

Availability: This is a hidden DLC pack underground to the far left and can be accessed when you have double-jump.

Price: 5 coins

Description: Adorable! Frankly, you'll buy anything at this point. There are no refunds for this item.

This will then give you a pet near the shopkeep:

It's a goldfish.

You tap the glass, but the fish is oblivious. Whatever it does, it's doing it now.

Disappointing.

Top Hat Pack

Availability: This is a hidden DLC pack which is up the platforms to the very left of the map. You won't be able to access it until you double-jump though.

Price: 5 coins

Description: You'll get a smug look on your face, as if to say, "Look at me, I've got a new hat". There are no refunds for this item.

Sexy Outfits Pack

Availability: This is a hidden DLC pack that can be found in a hidey-hole at the top right of the double-jump area just above the place the double jump DLC pack becomes available to purchase (just past the thick bush to the right).

Price: 5 coins

Description: Let the NPCs of the world slip into something a little more comfortable. There are no refunds for this item.

The Zombie Pack

Availability: Collect this hidden DLC pack from a hidey-hole up the last wall in the game before the troll.

Price: 5 coins

Description: This doesn't really fit, but our marketing department said every game needs zombies. There are no refunds for this item.

Gun Pack

Availability: Get this after you try and kill the troll with the sword.

Price: 75 coins

Description: A purely cosmetic weapon upgrade that in no way unbalances the game. Honest. Visit the gunsmith to redeem. There are no refunds for this item.

Night Map Pack

Availability: This becomes available when you examine the forest from the other end.

Price: 75 coins

Description: The same maps you own, but now at night! This is getting ridiculous. There are no refunds for this item.

Finish the Fight Pack

Availability: This becomes available when you get to the end of the game.

Price: 5 coins

Description: Experience the true conclusion to the game. We should have shipped this! There are no refunds for this item.

Awardments

There are 10 awardments in the game (these are like Xbox 360 achievements except there is no gamerscore attached to them because XBLIGs don't have gamerscore). Two of them are secret:

  1. These used to come standard
  2. Big Spender
  3. Hole in the wall (secret awardment)
  4. You did it! Kind of
  5. Got the girl
  6. Catch them all
  7. Anything for an awardment
  8. I've got a ruddy gun! (secret awardment)
  9. Consumerism
  10. At least it's not stamps

These used to come standard

Description: Purchase the pause screen, animation and audio DLC packs.

How to get it: Buy the three DLC packs mentioned. This'll cost 15 coins in total and will most likely be the first awardment you get in the game.

Big Spender

Description: Spent one hundred coins.

How to get it: Buy the DLC, and once 100 coins have been spent, it'll pop up.

Hole in the wall

Description: Discovered a hidey-hole!

How to get it: There are several hidey-holes in the game. These can be found because instead of the wall or floor or ceiling having a dark outline it has a part with no outline. These bits can be entered. Upon entering your first one you'll get this awardment.

You did it! Kind of

Description: You finished the game! Well it ended anyway. Maybe there's more?

How to get it: Finish the game for the first time.

Got the girl

Description: Finished the game. Vanquished evil, and the hero got the girl.

How to get it: Complete the game, but only in the way mentioned with the evil vanquished and the hero getting the girl.

Catch them all

Description: Found all the hidden DLC packs.

How to get it: Find all the hidden DLC packs (you don't necessarily need to purchase them though, just find them). There are five hidden DLC packs:

Anything for an awardment

Description: Killed all the human NPCs and all the sheep. And for what? An awardment? Geez.

How to get it: Kill all the 13 sheep. You can do this with the sword if you want. And once you have the gun you can kill all the human NPCs too. There are eight: Nickel and Dime; Smith and Blacksmith; Random and Shepherd; and Phil and Old Man. Kill them all.

I've got a ruddy gun!

Description: Found a weapon that in no way unbalances the game.

How to get it: Get the gun which is unlocked by playing through the story.

Consumerism

Description: You bought everything! Say, have you tried Lair of the Evildoer?

How to get it: Buy all the DLC. There are 16 DLC packs in total.

P.S. Liar of the Evildoer is one of the developers other games - seeing as you like purchasing DLC so much go and purchase that as well.

At least it's not stamps

Description: Collected all the coins in the game.

How to get it: Collect all 825 coins in the game.

Live Freemium or Die

Live Freemium of Die is the second episode of DLC Quest that will come out in Q4 2012. It will be released as a separate indie game on the 360, and a free update to DLC Quest for the PC and the Mac (which is all to do with the pricing structure differences between the 360 and the PC and Mac).

The Tim Roast Appreciation Society

I make these guides for free in my spare time. I hope this guide was useful to you. Please feel free to leave me feedback or comments (tjr10 [at] h o t m a i l . c o . u k). You can even DONATE me money via PayPal to this email address (by removing the spaces and replacing the [at] with @) if this guide was particularly useful to you. A £1 donation would be reasonable. This will aid me to write future guides. Thanks.

Copyright Tim Roast 2012

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