Table of Contents
EXCLUSIVE SCRIPT FOR TALES OF MONKEY ISLAND CHAPTER 3: LAIR OF THE LEVIATHAN
Author: Deborah L. Kearns
Copyright © 2010-2012 by Deborah L. Kearns. Tales of Monkey Island Chapter 3: Lair of the Leviathan is a trademark of LucasArts and Telltale Games. Tales of Monkey Island Chapter 3: Lair of the Leviathan: Copyright © 2009 by Telltale Games.
DISCLAIMER: This scripted document is intended ONLY for private home use and may not be reproduced through electronic or commercial means without the consent of the author (Deborah L. Kearns). It cannot be hosted, edited, or distributed for profit and may not be given away as an add-in/gift to bought items, and it should not be claimed as your own. All rights are reserved to respected parties, even those not explicitly stated herein. Thank you for reading this, and thank you for respecting FAQ authors.
WARNING: THIS SCRIPT CONTAINS SPOILERS AHEAD FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVEN'T PLAYED THE GAME OR ITS FIRST THREE CHAPTERS OR BEATEN THEM, SO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! THE SCRIPT WILL BE MORE ENJOYABLE TO BE READ IF YOU HAVE FINISHED THE FIRST THREE CHAPTERS, ESPECIALLY CHAPTER THREE, AT LEAST ONCE! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!
Hello, and welcome to my guide for the exclusive game script for Tales of Monkey Island Chapter 3: Lair of the Leviathan. As you may know, this is now my third attempt in using GameFAQs' Formatted FAQ text with markup to write a game script like this one. All the other game scripts from other video games have used plain-text format for easier script write, but not this one. So far, I have successfully created and uploaded my formatted game script FAQs for the previous chapters for ToMI: Launch of the Screaming Narwhal and The Siege of Spinner Cay. I'm still a bit inexperienced but improving in trying to use Formatted FAQ text to write this one, along with the game script FAQs that I'm about to write for the remaining two chapters from ToMI, so, again, it may be just like one of the scripts you read at the South Park Scriptorium website. If I make a few mistakes, I'll try to correct them as best as I can, so please bear with me, okay?
Anyway, like the previous two chapters, ToMI Chapter 3, along with the remaining two episodic chapters, has quite a loose gameflow like the Kill Bill series, so your storyline may vary from what's listed here, according to GameFAQs contributor HRahman. Due to the overwhelming amount of choices and story paths, I may put ONLY ONE kind of flow that makes the whole story, while the rest of the scripts may be explored by yourself. To tell you the truth, I don't really have that much of a free time, and I may or may not figure out a way to chart out the story system to make it an easy read. Sorry! Also, be cautionary, as this script I am writing for this game is a correction of all the game's subtitle errors, as the game and its subtitles are rife with so many misspellings, missing words, grammar problems, capitalization and punctuation errors and words in voices that don't match the words in the subtitles, as I will point out in brackets! Again, sorry, as you're gonna have to bear with me as I write this script! :P So, without further ado, we move on to the game script!
Cast of Characters
Guybrush Ulysses Marley-Threepwood, main hero of the entire Monkey Island series
Elaine Marley-Threepwood, former governor of the Tri-Island area and Guybrush's wife
LeChuck, main antagonist, now a good-natured human pirate
Thirteen Monkeys of Montevideo
Reginald Van Winslow, former captain and now first mate of the Screaming Narwhal
Morgan LeFlay, athletic and competent female bounty hunter who idolizes Guybrush
Coronado De Cava, explorer and former boyfriend of the Voodoo Lady, obsessed in trying to find La Esponja Grande
Voodoo Lady, recurring character of the Monkey Island series and narrator
Bugeye, leader of De Cava's crew and boxer
M. "Moose" Muszalski, bartender pirate who looks like a surfer dude
Noogie, nerdy pirate with glasses
Santino, bar skeleton
Marquis De Singe, antagonistic French nobleman and mad doctor
Murray, Demonic Talking Skull and recurring character of the Monkey Island series
Giant Manatees, including a male and a female (Leviathan)
R#. = Repeat Question C#. = Cycle of Questions E#. = End Conversation
[A dark purple mist swirls around and the Voodoo Lady's theme song plays in the dark background before the camera moves down to reveal the shrunken heads and the Voodoo Lady sitting on her desk between the purple flame torches while she speaks.]
VOODOO LADY: It is said that we are never so vulnerable than when we trust, but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find our heart's desire. [She takes out a tarot card from out of nowhere.] Guybrush Threepwood, trusting in his voodoo spell, unleashes a Pox on the Caribbean. [places the same "Disease" card onto her desk as she speaks] He escapes from Flotsam Island to pursue his wife Elaine, [takes out another tarot card, that of the "Lovers", and places it next to the previous card as she continues] and to find a cure to the Pox that infects them both. [The "Lovers" card suddenly glows up and rips apart, and the pieces are pulled away by some force and float up next to the Voodoo Lady as she speaks.] On the Jerkbait Islands, Guybrush finds Elaine together with his arch-enemy LeChuck. [The card half showing the female Lover floats down to merge with the other card half of the card showing a bearded man that appears out of nowhere next to the "Disease" card to form the updated "Lothario" card.] With deep reluctance, Guybrush trusts his wife with the former ghost pirate, and seeks the cure on his own. [The other card half showing the male lover floats down to merge with the other card half showing a cloaked woman with a dagger to the right of the "Disease" card to form the updated "Shivress" card.] Hunted by the lethal Morgan LeFlay, Threepwood must right his wrong by finding La Esponja Grande. [The Voodoo Lady picks out yet another card and looks at it for a few seconds before she continues.] For the Pox is transforming the seas into a treacherous beast... [As she speaks, she places the "Mouth" card between the "Disease" and "Shivress" cards before she finishes.] ...and the beast is hungry. [There is an ominous wind before the title screen appears.]
TALES OF MONKEY ISLAND
[Scene cuts to a frightened Morgan LeFlay holding her sword's blade at Reginald Van Winslow on the Screaming Narwhal at nighttime before she puts the blade down.]
MORGAN: I don't believe it...
GUYBRUSH: [raises up his hook] Well, you better believe it, sister! Wait, believe what? [Guybrush is unaware that a giant creature suddenly emerges from the water behind him.] ...What? [He finally looks behind him as the creature opens up its mouth, and he becomes frightened.] MANATEEEEEE!!!
MORGAN: [while he screams] Aaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!
WINSLOW: [screaming along with them] Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! [As they all scream together, the Giant Manatee soon swallows up the entire Screaming Narwhal and slowly swims back downward into the sea, leaving no trace of it or the trio in the night sky. Scene cuts to black, and there is a sound of screaming and a "Yipes!" from Guybrush before the scene fades back to Winslow, looking around near Guybrush at the Screaming Narwhal. Winslow holds a lantern in his hand as the credits begin to appear.]
- Directed By:
- Joe Pinney
[Guybrush finds that they are now in the mouth of the manatee as Morgan's sword is pointed at him.]
MORGAN: Guybrush, I'm taking you in.
- Written By:
- Sean Vanaman
- Co-Directed By:
- Jake Rodkin
GUYBRUSH: [responds] I'm sorry, I'm inside a manatee at the moment. [Scene cuts to a far-off view of the ship as he continues before he looks around in awe.] Ehh..... [looks up] Look behind you --
MORGAN: [ignorant] Oh, I've heard that one before. [She is unaware that a gunpowder barrel has rolled atop the mast and falls down onto her head, knocking her out.] Ugh! [She falls down unconscious, and Winslow and Guybrush look down on the edge of the ship's deck.]
- Programmed By:
- Randy Tudor
- Choreography By:
- Daniel Herrera
- Eric Parsons
WINSLOW: Well done, sir! Walked the bonnie bounty huntress right into a trap!
- Music By:
- Michael Land
GUYBRUSH: You have to admire her stick-to-it-iveness. [He jumps down from the ship and lands on the manatee's tongue along with Winslow, and they see Morgan unconscious.]
WINSLOW: She's out cold.
GUYBRUSH: Good. We need to get back on the track to finding La Esponja Grande.
- Art Direction:
- Derek Sakai
- David Bogan
GUYBRUSH: [continues] I'm going to go find a way out of here. Preferably through the front door. [Winslow walks off to her while Guybrush speaks.] Not the [uh]... ahem. Service entrance.
- Story By:
- Mark Darin
- Mike Stemmle
- Dave Grossman
WINSLOW: I'll keep an eye on Miss LeFlay. If she stirs, I'll give her the old scurvy buttons! [Guybrush stops as he hears this.]
- Based on Characters Created By:
- Ron Gilbert
GUYBRUSH: [disturbed] I don't want to know what that is. [He walks off as Winslow looks at her.]
[Guybrush looks at Winslow...]
WINSLOW: Don't worry, sir. I've got me eye on Miss LeFlay. [text says "my", voice says "me"]
[...and at Morgan LeFlay.]
WINSLOW: She's out cold, sir.
[Guybrush moves east to a shelter with some equipment lying around.]
GUYBRUSH: An encampment! Talk about roughing it. Better go check it out. [He walks around to find an explorer working there.] Um, hello? Excuse me?
EXPLORER: [looks up in fright] What is this?! An adventurer from the outside!
GUYBRUSH AND EXPLORER: [in unison] Who are you? [introducing each other] I'm Guybrush Threepwood/Coronado De Cava, Mighty Pirate/Explorer. [After a short pause...]
GUYBRUSH: De Cava! I've been looking for you! What are you doing in here?
DE CAVA: I'm on my way to a very important artifact, to be acquired for a VERY important woman.
GUYBRUSH: I hate to be the one to break this to you, but you're stuck inside of an overgrown sea mammal. You're not on your way anywhere.
DE CAVA: Heavens, no! I'm not stuck! Quite the contrary! It's all part of the plan of the Ocean Gods! The mouth of the manatee leads me to the artifact, the seahorses led the mouth to me. Just as I freed myself from the brig of Phatt Island by bribing the guard for his bootlace, stringing him up with a pulley fashioned from a stale scone [Guybrush is bothered at this] and then growing out my toenails over the course of a year in order to carefully carve them into a lock picking kit, I, Coronado De Cava, will walk out of this beast when the time is right! [Scene cuts to a close-up of De Cava's eyes while he speaks.]
GUYBRUSH: And when is that? I'm on a bit of a timetable.
DE CAVA: When we arrive at the sacred manatee mating grounds!
GUYBRUSH: Oh boy.
["How long have you been in here?"]
GUYBRUSH: How long have you been in here?
DE CAVA: Years! This journey has been even longer than expected. But exploration is fraught with unforeseen hurdles yearning to be overcome!
["You made a lock picking kit out of toenails?"]
GUYBRUSH: You made a lock picking kit out of toenails?
DE CAVA: That's right.
GUYBRUSH: You didn't try the tempt-the-guard-dog-with-the-bone trick?
DE CAVA: Bah, that's for amateurs.
["So, I have this locket I'm supposed to give to you."]
GUYBRUSH: [takes out the locket] So, I have this locket I'm supposed to give to you.
DE CAVA: [takes the locket] [text error adds a "My..."] Oh my... I haven't seen this locket for some years. [opens the locket] She's just as I remember. Where did you-- [stops for a bit, as he looks at it, then...] What is this? [There is an arrow button that is pointed at a picture of a young De Cava, and at once he presses it. The locket emits a sickly power, possessing him as a zombie, and at once the Voodoo Lady's voice speaks to Guybrush from De Cava's mouth.]
VOODOO LADY: [in De Cava's body] Threepwood, it is I.
GUYBRUSH: [surprised] Yikes!
VOODOO LADY: [in De Cava's body] Well done. You have found Coronado De Cava and are one step closer to La Esponja Grande. De Cava and his crew will prove indispensable on your quest. [Guybrush is awed at this while she speaks.] And while the Pox spreads with every passing moment, you must tread lightly, Guybrush. Years of searching for the sponge have made De Cava unstable. He was always a bit of a sensitive soul so please, I implore you, do not mention me. Do not mention La Esponja. And whatever you do, do not tell him where you acquired his locket. [Her ghostly glow suddenly leaves De Cava, and he is no longer possessed.]
DE CAVA: [suddenly becomes angry] Where did you get this?! Who sent you?! What are you doing here?!
["The Voodoo Lady gave me the locket!"]
GUYBRUSH: Look, the Voodoo Lady gave me the locket so I could find La Esponja Grande--
["I'm here to retrieve La Esponja Grande!" (PENDING)]
["I, uh... I, uh..."]
GUYBRUSH: [nervously] I, um... I, uh... [gets shaky, then goes into rapid-fire mumbling] The Voodoo Lady gave me the locket and told me to find you so I could track down La Esponja Grande for her so we can cure--
[NOTE: Regardless of which topic you choose, the story continues on as before.]
DE CAVA: [shocked] She WHAT?!? Mi Dio! [sic] That two-timing, soothsaying strumpet!
DE CAVA: La Esponja is to be mine to give to her, as a gargantuan, absorbent symbol of MY fiery passion! [points at himself while he speaks] I'm gone for two seconds and she's making time with a prepubescent picaroon! [He points his finger at Guybrush.]
GUYBRUSH: No! [No,] It's not like that! Yeesh, no way. We're hardly even friends.
DE CAVA: RIGHT. A FRIEND [to] who she gives an invaluable, sentimental locket. I bet she never sends you on any QUESTS either.
GUYBRUSH: Uh, no! I mean, from time to time she tells me what to do and where to go with little or no context, but--
DE CAVA: [interrupts and points the finger at Guybrush] That sounds like a quest! [becomes saddened] She used to give ME quests. I thought I was special... Has she ever made you a voodoo doll?
DE CAVA: I don't believe you. Have you held her in your arms?
GUYBRUSH: What?! NO! I'm married! Look! [shows his hook to De Cava while he speaks]
DE CAVA: [points at him] I don't see a ring, Señor Liebrush.
GUYBRUSH: [realizes] Ah! I left it with my other hand!
DE CAVA: [furious] I'll kill you. [Guybrush becomes shocked at this.]
GUYBRUSH: I'm not after the Voodoo Lady's heart OR La Esponja Grande.
DE CAVA: Then why are you here?
GUYBRUSH: Um... vacation?
DE CAVA: Is that so?
GUYBRUSH: Yes! Honeymooning, in fact!
DE CAVA: With your invisible wife?
GUYBRUSH: My very REAL wife! [Eh,] Let me just... go... get her. [walks away]
DE CAVA: I shall await her alleged arrival with tantalizing disbelief! [Guybrush walks up to the gangplank and jumps onto the Screaming Narwhal.]
[He looks at the cannon...]
GUYBRUSH: The Narwhal's cannon. While it lacks firepower, it does look scary.
[...and at the quarters door.]
GUYBRUSH: The Narwhal's quarters. They're resplendent.
[Guybrush then climbs up the mainmast and on to the crow's nest.]
GUYBRUSH: Eustachian passage!
[He looks at the cochlea...]
GUYBRUSH: While it may look like it's full of candy, I believe the cochlea is key to this manatee's sense of direction.
[...and at the wound.]
GUYBRUSH: I've seen my fair share of flesh wounds, and this one is world-class. [He turns around again.] A cochlea, or inner ear. Hmm. I may have gone to public school, but I think those are supposed to come in pairs.
[Look at the wound again]
GUYBRUSH: No wonder this guy is swimming in circles. He's missing half of his internal navigation system.
[He then takes the stinky earwax and sniffs.]
GUYBRUSH: *Sniff, snifff.* Mmm... manatee ear wax. Rotten AND pungent. Perfect. [He puts it away as a smile lights up his face, and slides down the mainmast with a thud. He gets up and goes down the gangplank, where he jumps off the Narwhal and looks around.] I almost forgot! [snaps his fingers] My Pyrite Parrot... I never leave home without it. [He searches his pockets for the parrot, but...] Hmm. It must've been jostled out of my pockets and washed away during ingestion. [shrugs his shoulders] It's gone forever. [He then looks at the grub and picks it up.] Eww, a slimy grub. [He puts it in his pocket.]
[Examine the grub]
GUYBRUSH: A squishy grub.
[Use the grub anywhere]
GUYBRUSH: Every grub I waste is one more I'll have to pick up for De Cava.
[Examine Elaine's ring]
GUYBRUSH: It's Elaine's wedding ring.
[Use the hook anywhere]
GUYBRUSH: I'm going to have to adjust to life with a hook hand. For starters, I shouldn't do that.
[Examine the Fisheye of the Manatee]
GUYBRUSH: The Fisheye of the Manatee. It has a red-tinted lens.
[Use the Fisheye of the Manatee anywhere]
GUYBRUSH: No secret messages there.
[Guybrush goes to De Cava again.]
GUYBRUSH: Hey, De Cava...
DE CAVA: [angry] Get away from me, or I'll kill you! You don't sail another man's ship, simply because he left it in the harbor! [Guybrush backs away.]
[He goes up to Winslow and Morgan.]
GUYBRUSH: Winslow, I need to revive Morgan and present her to De Cava as my fake wife.
WINSLOW: [giggles] My, that reminds me of the time... [text error adds another "the" after the first "the"]
GUYBRUSH: [interrupts] Not now, Winslow! De Cava's crazy!
WINSLOW: [shrugs his shoulders] Very well. I'm well trained in naval first aid. [snaps his fingers] Do as I say. First things first. Take her pulse and see if she's alive.
GUYBRUSH: [surprised] What? She might be dead?!
WINSLOW: You never know about these things. Her wrist, captain. [She moves around a bit while Winslow speaks.]
[Guybrush looks at Morgan's sword...]
GUYBRUSH: I have such fond memories of that blade held to my throat. [raises his fist in pride and sighs] Those were good times.
[...at her boots...]
GUYBRUSH: [off-camera] Boots. Presumably made for walking.
[...and at her head.]
WINSLOW: While the neck is also a prime location to take a lady's pulse, her wrist should suffice. Best to not get fresh.
[Guybrush kneels down and takes her wrist and places it on her abdomen to take her pulse, exposing her tattoo.]
WINSLOW: [off-camera] Very good.
GUYBRUSH: Her pulse is strong. [looks around] What's this? [There is a close-up of the tattoo on her arm.] A tattoo of the name "Gus."
MORGAN: [mumbles in her sleep] THIS is for JUGBENDER! [He puts her wrist back to her head.]
WINSLOW: Excellent, she's alive and kicking. Which reminds me, next, remove any and all weapons from the victim. We don't want her thrashing about and lopping off any more appendages.
GUYBRUSH: [lifts up his hook hand as a bright idea] Good thinking. [He then takes the sword.] All right, I've got her sword. [examines the sword] It's engraved with a name: Dante Dragotta.
WINSLOW: Ooh, he sounds tough.
MORGAN: [mumbles in her sleep again] Gomez... not on the carpet!
WINSLOW: Now elevate her feet to help with circulation.
GUYBRUSH: Got it. [He then reaches for her boots...] Elevating her feet... [...and uses his hook hand and his normal one to lift her feet before something falls off her right boot.] What's this? [He takes the item and examines it.] An Assassin's Ledger?
GUYBRUSH: Who knew bounty hunters were so meticulous? [He places the item back. Inside the ledger, there is a To-Do list with the list of subjects and their payments: "Gustavo: free - personal. Prince Hipolito de Toro: +10,000. New ship: -10,000. Lunch: -5. Gideon Gimpleg: +300. Funeral payment to Noonie: -6,000. Guybrush Threepwood: [N/A]." All of them are crossed out except Guybrush's name.]
WINSLOW: She still hasn't come around. A most curious case. If only we had smelling salts! [snaps his finger] That would do the trick.
[Use any item on Morgan]
GUYBRUSH: That's no way to wake her up.
[Guybrush walks up to her, holds up the stinky earwax, and puts it to her face as she sniffs it.]
MORGAN: [wakes up] ...Guybrush?
GUYBRUSH: [brushes off his sleeve] Upsy-daisy, mon adversaire. That'll teach you to take a legendary pirate at swordpoint. [She stands up and looks around for her sword.] You lost your weapon privileges.
MORGAN: Hmmph. Where ARE we?
GUYBRUSH: We've been swallowed by a giant manatee and you're about to pose as my fake wife in order to placate a puzzle-obsessed whackjob.
MORGAN: Oh no I'm not. As much as I'd love to play house with THE Guybrush Threepwood, [points at him] I'm already late getting you back to Flotsam Island. [Winslow suddenly turns into a zombie pirate spawn and approaches them.]
WINSLOW: [monster voice] Listen here, you poor excuse for a prissy privateer! Any more lip out of you, and the Captain'll be sending yer carcass on a tour of the small intestine! [They both become frightened before Winslow returns to normal.]
GUYBRUSH: I guess we call this the good pirate/bad pirate routine.
WINSLOW: [confused] Oh my! Ahem. I'm terribly sorry. [Heh.] I think I ought to rest for a spell. Must've taken a mouthful of something vile on the way down. [He walks off, leaving the two confused.]
GUYBRUSH: [looks at her] SEE?!? That's the Pox! It turns people into... whatever THAT was and it's in the process of ravaging the entire Caribbean... even... Elaine. [She looks at him for a second, then...]
MORGAN: Okay, fine, but you have to do something for ME.
GUYBRUSH: What is it?
MORGAN: Will you sign this for me? [She takes out Guybrush's picture in excitement.]
GUYBRUSH: Two seconds ago you were ready to slit my throat and now you want to hang me in your locker?
MORGAN: I was just doing my job.
GUYBRUSH: Give it here. [She holds up the picture and he signs it with his pen.] Now let's go deal with kooky Coronado De Cava. You're my make believe wife, so just act like it. [He walks off and she follows him. Scene fades to black before fading back to Guybrush and Morgan walking toward De Cava.]
DE CAVA: Well, well, well, the panty-waisted [sic] pirate wannabe has found himself a lady!
GUYBRUSH: Coronado, I'd like to introduce you to my wife, E[la]--
MORGAN: [interrupts] Morgan.
GUYBRUSH: RIGHT. So as you can see, there is no way I could be romantically affiliated with the Voodoo Lady. I am a one-woman man. [Morgan nods.]
DE CAVA: Sure you are, lover boy. If you two are REALLY just wed, you don't mind answering a few questions?
MORGAN: Do your worst!
GUYBRUSH: I appreciate the enthusiasm, but easy, girl.
DE CAVA: Together now, how did you meet?
GUYBRUSH AND MORGAN: Uh...
MORGAN: [embarrassed, quickly tries correcting him] We met through work!
["We met through work!"]
GUYBRUSH AND MORGAN: We met through work!
[NOTE: Regardless of which topic you choose, the story continues on as before.]
DE CAVA: Hmm. Where did you go on your first date?
GUYBRUSH AND MORGAN: Uhh...
["The Sunken Discotheques of Po[p]gowatu." (PENDING)] [NOTE: It's kind of odd that the box cover art says "Popgowatu", but here, it's spelled "Pogowatu" without another "p".]
["The circus!" (PENDING)]
["We went sailing."]
GUYBRUSH AND MORGAN: We went sailing.
[NOTE: Again, the story continues on regardless of which topic you choose.]
DE CAVA: All right, that's enough.
GUYBRUSH: You believe us?
DE CAVA: Almost.
GUYBRUSH: Almost? What do I have to do to prove to you that I'm not your rival for the Voodoo Lady?
DE CAVA: Just take a step forward.
GUYBRUSH: Okay... [He walks forward one step, but...]
DE CAVA: Both of you. [She reluctantly follows Guybrush by taking a step forward.] Now let's get down to brass barnacles. [He pulls the lever, and at once Guybrush looks up before something falls down on him, and both he and Morgan are caged up before the scene fades to black. A few minutes later, their cages are now lifted up in the air.] I've asked you both a series of personal questions, the answers of which are recorded here on these cards. [shows the cards to them] Mr. Threepwood, you'll be happy to know that your "wife" has passed with flying colors. She seems to know every single detail of your life. [Morgan looks at Guybrush in awe while De Cava speaks.]
GUYBRUSH: You don't say.
DE CAVA: Now it's your turn. Let's see what you know about Mrs. Threepwood. Answer three in a row correctly, and I'll believe you are honeymooners. Incorrectly and... It's the bowels of the beast for both of you! Question number one:... [De Cava asks Guybrush the first of a series of three of the six questions that I will describe later in the Intro: De Cava's Questions section of Script Miscellany if I get a chance. Anyway, Guybrush manages to guess the first question right, and the bell sounds, with De Cava saying, "Correct!" He then moves on to "Question number two," and Guybrush manages to answer right again. Once more De Cava moves on to "The third and final question," and once more Guybrush answers right with gusto.] Well, perhaps I was mistaken... you two might be married after all. [A few moments later, Guybrush and Morgan are out of their cages.]
GUYBRUSH: Oh, it's all right, if a guy turns up in a manatee with your girlfriend's locket a man has the right to ask a question or two. [brushes off his sleeve] Now, about this sponge...
DE CAVA: The one you're NOT after?
GUYBRUSH: We're just sightseeing. Right, HONEY?
MORGAN: That's right, Pookie Pie.
DE CAVA: Well, perhaps you would like to join my crew? It could make a romantic tale for your honeymoon scrapbook.
GUYBRUSH: I'd love to join your crew! I'm ga-ga for scrapbooking. We'll find La Esponja Grande in no time.
DE CAVA: Magnífico!
GUYBRUSH: What's next? A stool sample?
DE CAVA: No, you look like a man of firm constitution. [salutes] Now, any questions?
["What's the deal with the sacred manatee mating grounds?"]
GUYBRUSH: These sacred manatee mating grounds... [Morgan folds her arms while he speaks] it's the home of La Esponja Grande?
DE CAVA: That's correct.
["Where's the rest of your crew?"]
GUYBRUSH: [remembering the Voodoo Lady's words] You have a crew? Are you counting your mood swings as members?
DE CAVA: I set out from Flotsam Island all those years ago with four other brave souls, all of whom were to play a special role in finding La Esponja. I may have been a stern leader, but I loved them like sons.
GUYBRUSH: Were you... forced to eat them?
DE CAVA: I would've rather starved than see harm befall them! Alas, they perished in the belly of the beast long ago. [raises his fist in anger] A torturous demise.
GUYBRUSH: [Whoa,] Sorry 'bout that.
DE CAVA: Sometimes I can still hear their screams. [As if on cue, faint screams are coming out of nowhere, which sound like a "WOOOO-HOOO!" of joy and excitement.]
[E. "When are we due to arrive at the mating grounds?"]
GUYBRUSH: When are we due to arrive? Wifey is [uh,] getting antsy.
DE CAVA: Ah well, I'm afraid the manatee has been lost for some time now.
GUYBRUSH: Lost? He's not a eunuch, is he?
DE CAVA: His plumbing is still in working order. But his internal compass is another matter.
GUYBRUSH: How can you tell?
DE CAVA: [pulls out a compass] Around and around he go... [The compass legs spin around while he speaks.] I've deduced that the problem lies within the manatee's inner ear. [puts the compass away] So, I'm crafting him a new one.
GUYBRUSH: That explains the spinning. How are you building an inner ear?
DE CAVA: I'm weaving the husks of Manatee Throat Grubs into a new cochlea for the beast. It's the only way. If you could bring me some, we'll save precious time.
GUYBRUSH: I'm on it. [He turns around and walks, and Morgan follows.] It looks like all we have to do is skin a few manatee throat grubs for the old man and then build a giant synthetic cochlea to replace the missing one up in the ear canal, [they stop at the edge] and we'll be on our way.
MORGAN: OR, you could give me my sword and I can just CUT our way out of here.
GUYBRUSH: I'm not letting you slice this poor fella open! Manatees are gentle giants!
MORGAN: [getting impatient] Guybrush... [She approaches him.]
GUYBRUSH: Back off, Susie Slicer... [He backs away...] Eeeeeasy... [...before he starts to slip his foot off the edge.] WHOA! [He loses his balance and falls off.]
MORGAN: Drat. [She jumps down after him.]
[End of Intro. Scene moves to title for Chapter 3: Lair of the Leviathan.]