Bart Simpson's Escape From Camp Deadly

"Escape from this game, QUICK!"

The Simpsons getting their own game and merchandise license... Some were excited. Others were indifferent. Eventually, however, many were crushed. The Simpsons games came as an early warning to many other animated sitcoms not to make games based on said shows. Can you imagine a Family Guy game or a Duckman game? The first game, Bart vs. The Space Mutants, should have served as a bloody head on a huge stake in the ground. However, like the idiotic people in the horror movies who usually wind up killed in the worst way, they ignored all the warnings. Bart vs. The World and Escape from Camp Deadly would eventually appear on NES and Gameboy, respectively. Despite the fact that the games really blew, I still put money toward renting and playing Simpsons games simply because I was a Simpsons fanatic back then. Eventually, Escape from Camp Deadly would find its way into my hands. I enjoyed it for a few days, it's simplicity and sheer Bart Simpson atmosphere. After playing and getting quite far in it, however, I learned to hate this game. Level after level after level and almost no hope of an end. Finally, I decided I had had enough of this game and retired it along with the rest of my collection.

One can wonder immediately, ''How the hell do you do a Simpsons game with an old school, video game storyline?'' Simple. You don't. You simply make a typical video game storyline and just include Simpsons characters in it. Brilliant, no? Well, in this game you play Bart. He and Lisa have been sent to Camp Deadly by their parents. The place is run by Mr. Burns' nephew, Ironfist Burns. Bart and Lisa soon find that the camp itself is wretched and evil. They decide to escape, finding that the game leading to the escape is just as wretched and evil. Honestly, how blames them for escaping? If I were programmed into this game, I would escape then hunt down those responsible, almost like The Running Man!

Now, grab that boomerang Lisa gives you and strap yourself in for a long line of boring, tedious, and redundant levels of mayhem! Yes, you get the same level several times with a few small differences. You may notice that the game really does not throw you a very well varied level set up. You start out in the forest. After some time in the forest, you fight a bully (one of the bosses) and then it's on to the mess hall. After quite some time in the mess hall... It's back out to the forest? Again, you go through the forest and wind up in another mess hall... Wait a minute, are we there yet? No, we're not! And if you ask again, I'm opening the door, pushing you onto the hard concrete, and laughing sadistically.

...Okay, enough summer vacation flashbacks... Ah, better... Anyway, as you can tell, the level design to the game is simply atrocious. You would almost swear it was created with platform game making software. Sure, the levels do present some challenge. However, they do not give you much variety. Most of the levels are just bland obstacles that have been present in platform games for years before the advent of this one. In a sense, this was almost like playing the original Super Mario Bros. with bad controls and an even blander level set-up.

Did someone say controls? Indeed, I did. The controls here are not pure evil like the level designs. They are, however, quite stiff. This makes boss battle quite difficult, as you must angle Bart awkwardly in order to launch a boomerang behind the opponent. This also hinders you in a few other areas, such as jumping across pits. To top it off, the developers decided that some of the pits should be quite large with a very narrow piece of land to land on. Combine that with the lackluster controls and you should produce quite a symphony of swearing.

The only true upside to the game, in fact, comes from the graphics. Okay, so the graphics are not a simply orgasmic black and green fusion on your GB screen. They are, however, bearable. The character designs in the game are actually sufficient enough. How can you tell? They at least look like Bart and Lisa. It could be much worse. Think of playing a Simpsons game where few of the characters look like who they are supposed to be, and those that do look very piss-poorly designed. Yes, this is a reference to Bart vs. The Space Mutants. The representational quality of the graphics was one of the only things (if not the only thing) that was not hindered by poor development. You can see it in Bart and Lisa, you can see it in the environment (despite bad level design, the environmental graphics are not too shabby), and you can even see it in the game over screen with Ironfist Burns.

Have you ever gone to download a MIDI file of a song from a video game and found that the MIDI version is much less effective than the original? The same can be said for the classic Simpsons music in this game. Sure, it would be improper to expect it to sound like the actual theme song. Nonetheless, the Gameboy rendition of the theme is a headache inspired horror of 8-bit sound. What's worse is that you hear it all the freakin' time throughout the game. There are a few areas where you don't hear it. I like to refer to those as grace periods. However, once you're out of the grace period, you are once again attacked by the same theme again. The fact that it is not as good as the actual theme is not what is so torturous about it. In fact, it's quite tolerable... In moderation. However, this game has no concept of moderation when it comes to the theme music. It is played throughout most of the game, and after 10 minutes of having to hear the same theme over and over again, I'm usually ready to murder. The least they could have done was make some more appropriate sound effects. Instead, you are treated to some of the blandest and more yawn-invoking works in sound effectdom. This especially include Bart voice in the game. The ''Eat my shorts,'' isn't so bad. The ''Aye caramba'' (as it's spelled in the game) is annoying as all hell. Let's not forget the high-pitched whine that throwing a boomerang produces.

Now, that's not to say that this game couldn't have had an Oprah style makeover. The graphics are well enough left alone. We should start with a total level makeover. Just a few tucks here, some foundation there, a little improved designing right in this area and, PRESTO! We've got a gorgeous level design! Should we stop there? Oh, no no no! Take those tired controls tone them up! Give 'em some hot n' spicy TLC and they should be a lot less stiff.

Maybe they should have taken the hint and stop making Simpsons games. They never did. More and more were made, most of them just as abominable as this little turkey (Simpsons Wrestling), others a softer grain from the sandpaper that made Escape from Camp Deadly (Virtual Bart). This would bring up a question as to how this license makes any money. The moral of the story is that some things just do not make good game licenses. Think of what a Critic or Family Guy license would have been like. Animated sitcoms make good Shockwave games, and that's really about it. .

FINAL JUDGMENT
Graphics: Bearable at best 7/10
Sounds: Nothing remarkable 5/10
Control: Could take a while 5/10
Plot/Storyline: Want a good Simpson's story? Then watch the show instead... 3/10
Gameplay: A safe alternative to sleeping pills 4/10
All Together: 3/10

Perks
*Graphics are tolerable...

Downers
*The game is not!
*Irritating voices and sounds.
*Bad control response
*Redundant level line-up
*Drab gameplay

Recommendations
If you're looking for a Simpsons game to play, the best one in platform format is Virtual Bart, which really is not anything to get excited over either. The only really good Simpsons game out there is the arcade game. If it's a good, simplistic 2D platformer you're looking for, I suggest Super Mario World 2, Gimmick, and any of the early Kirby games.

Reviewer's Score: 3/10, Originally Posted: 04/09/01, Updated 05/19/03