Indy 500

"They tried...."

Game.com. The system that was dead when it started. And most of the games were as well. Indy500 shines on the list as worst though. Here's why...

Unlike my normal reviews, I will NOT break this game down bit by bit. There is nothing to it. NOTHING. Seriously. There is so little to this game(which can't even be called a ''racing game'', mind you. the only thing racing will be your pulse as you try to control yourself from throwing your game.com out the window. Or burning it. Or microwaving it. Whichever you prefer.), that even my REVIEW falls short. Let's look at the facts......

GRAPHICS - 2/10

Pixelized, Game-boy-ish, outdated graphics. Come on. This is supposed to be a handheld port of a popular arcade game?! I sure don't think so...the only think I commend them on is having a handheld game that features a first person view. Yes, cockpit view. Albeit grainy...and it looks like you have flies all over your view, but that's really just pixels they never edited out of the redraw scripts.

GAMEPLAY - 1/10

You don't accelerate. You upshift. You don't brake. You downshift. What? Yes, it's true. There is no way to really control your car. It moves to a certain speed, then waits for you to upshift so you can go just a BIT quicker. But it doesn't feel like it, since the track scrolls at the same speed no matter what. Also, it's hard to tell when you're about to collide with another car. You might think you're JUSt past it, when....oops. Bam. Crash. Wait a minute or two to get back on track. Lose. Sad.

SOUND - 2/10

What's with the announcer? Last I remembered, Texan drawls belonged in NASCAR, not INDY. Also, there is nothing you can really deem as ''sound'', just different pitches of STATIC, which they claim as your ''Engine''. And the cheezy ''Boom'', that sounds like a steel cooking pot hitting a tiled kitchen floor.

REPLAYABILITY - 1/10

Wow. There's 1 track. It's an oval. With left turns. Whoopee. Oh look, two cars. Two transmissions. Automatic just means you don't have to upshift or downshift, you just accelerate till you crash!!!! There is NO replayability in this game. Sorry folks.

If you were one of the unlucky souls who recieved a game.com, you have my pity!!!! Even thought they tried, which I DO commend them for, this is still just outright bad. It could have been done better by a 13 year old hacker. Maybe...just maybe, we might've gotten a better game.

Reviewer's Score: 3/10, Originally Posted: 10/29/02, Updated 10/29/02