Wario Land II

""Its-a me, Wario! Im'ma fat, disgraceful man!" But what a fun game he's in!"

The year eludes me, but I got a Game Boy Color from my aunt some time ago, around the system's release, and it was an birthday gift. I begged my mom to get me Wario Land II. She did, and what fun I had. Of course, being a young lad and probably with ADD (Was that a SHINY OBJECT!?), I forgot about Wario Land II before I even finished it. Well, a few years later, on a rainy day, I started to play, and I beat it. ...And even MORE years later, I finished the game %100. That was earlier this year (2007) in fact. So with the game fresh in my memory, let's review.

Graphics: 6/10

Okay, it's a Game Boy game, so I can't be too harsh on the graphics, but things are a little... Difficult to make out at times. Still, you can tell it's Wario by looking at him, and a lot of the backgrounds are pretty slick. Somewhat above average.

Sound: 4/10

The sound falls on it's butt. Most of the noises are patterns of beeps and little digitized "screeches" of noise. They can really make you grind your teeth sometimes, but beeps are really about the best you're going to get from the Game Boy Color. I mean, come on, it's basically a portable NES.

Music: 7/10

While also beeps, the music is a bit more tolerable. Most of the tunes are good. Kind of upbeat, a little "odd" sounding, and fitting. Pretty good for the Game Boy.

Control: 9/10

Wario controls not like a fat man with gas, but as nimbly as Mario. Making him move, jump and charge his enemies is as easy as 1, 2, 3. Although, for a game that's pretty much based on the Mario universe, would you expect any less?

Gameplay: 9/10

Wario Land II is tons of fun to play. Wario can't die. That's right, he's immortal. That said, the challenge is not in combat, but in finding everything. This games catches lots of crap, I've seen, for being perceived as "easy". Look, if you want hard combat and platforming, you're in the wrong game. The fun and challenge in Wario is not avoiding death, not about solving puzzles... But stealing everything that isn't nailed down! Okay, that's an exaggeration. But the main goal is to collect coins in a level, and use the coins to play a minigame where you get the level's main treasure. After the level, you solve a recognition puzzle to get panels to a large picture, and there's one panel for each level. Collect them all, and all the treasures, and you get a surprise...

Once you've beaten the game at least once (and there are quite a few different endings), you can go back to any level you've cleared before. You can amass coins, get the treasures and panels you missed the first time around, or just play for fun. I like that in a game.

Anyway, I trailed off quite a bit there! The main gameplay is Wario running around a level, collecting the dough and beating up his hapless enemies. He can shoulder-ram them, or jump on them to stun them. Then he can pick them up and throw them around! It's satisfying to grab an enemy and beat the snot out of his buddies using him.

Getting hit by an enemy, just a basic attack, will knock Wario back and make him drop some coins. Some enemies can change his status, which is occasionally helpful, and these enemies are usually placed near obstacles Wario can't clear normally. For example, when a zombie attacks him, he becomes one himself! He can fall through thin floors, and to cure him, step into light. Or if a chef enemy feeds him cake, he fattens up even more, making him unbearably slow. However, he can break certain blocks. To make him thinner, you have to walk that extra weight off. It's creative, and funny, too.

Story: 5/10

A rival of Wario, the evil Captain Syrup, breaks into Wario's magnificent castle, steals his loot, and vandalizes the place while she's at it. Well, our man Wario isn't going to stand for that. After cleaning up his castle a little and beating up the goons Syrup left in there, he takes off across the land to find her, thieving all the way! Not the best story, and there's not even any text, but it's at least funny once in awhile, during the brief cut scenes.

Replayability: 8/10

It's a lot of fun to play after you've beaten the game, to find all of the treasures and panels. Doing so nets you access to a secret, which I'll admit is underwhelming, but it's still nice to have a reward after all that hard work.

Overall: 9/10

I bumped the overall score up a little because I'm so fond of this game, but hey, it's lots of fun. Go find yourself a copy of it if you like Wario, or creative platforming, anyway. The game has it's downs, but it's ups outweigh them in my opinion.

Reviewer's Score: 9/10, Originally Posted: 10/29/07

Game Release: Wario Land II (US, 03/31/99)