VirtualBoy

"I'm not going to sit here and lie to you, Nintendo REALLY screwed up on this one."

Ah, yes, the infamous Nintendo Virtual Boy. It's been practically the butt of every Nintendo joke since 1995. If you hear it's name, you automatically think "Virtual Boy? That thing that pours Hellfire into your eyes and eats your soul?" It's not THAT bad people! Really! But it is Nintendo's worst (2nd worst IMO, I liked it more than the 64DD) and it is what happens when incomplete brainstorming is put into production.

System Design- 2
The 32-bit VB was introduced in 1995, when Nintendo needed a new system to tide gamers over until the N64 came out the next year and also compete on the same level as the Playstation and Saturn. It's a unique device where you have to put your head into a visor to see the screen (Contrary to popular belief, people with glasses can still play the system though). This is the system's first fault as it has absolutely none portability. Another fault (another big one) is that the stand that held up the visor was easily breakable, Nintendo Customer Services ate up through so many stand demands, they actually had to break out new VBs and take their stands to keep up. Also another big minus against the system is that children under 8 couldn't play it, says right there on the box, I guess it's bad for their eyes or something. The last big thing against this system is that there are no 2-player games, the system is completely 1-player.

Graphics- 7
First of all, the only color this system has is red, just different shades of red. So that's where the whole "AAAAHHHH, my eyes" thing comes from. In all honesty, it's not that bad, although things will look rather bright after an extensive game session. All in all, most of the games on the VB look like souped up GB games with special effects that surpass the SNES, but no way in Hell were they comparable to the Saturn or Playstation. The games that really showed off it's power were Red Alarm and TeleroBoxer.

Sound- 7
The good thing about the VB is that it had Stereo sound, so it sounded like you were surrounded by the game. The games for the most part however, never surpassed SNES quality with a few speech clips here and there, so nothing special when compared the the CD sound of the Saturn and Playstation.

Control- 9
Easily one of the best parts about the system, the controller is the most comfortable peripheral I have ever grasped. It is molded to fit anyone's hand perfectly. The controller has 2 D-pads (I think only 1 game uses the right D-pad, I'm not sure.) 2 triggers, 2 action buttons (A & B), start and select. Also the On/Off switch is located here.

Games- 5
Unfortunately, Nintendo's "Quality over Quanity" slogan doesn't work here. Only 20-30 games were released for it, with only a few of them being from 3rd party publishers, and what games the VB had, they weren't very long or challenging because the VB was meant to be played in small doses. You won't find any RPGs or Adventure titles here, only action games. Some gems can be found on the system though. Wario Land VB, Red Alarm, Jack Bros., Vertical Force, and Galactic Pinball are my favorites.

Other features- 3
It would've been cool to have had a link cable, backwards compatibility with GB and other stuff, but sadly, it's just not there. There is an AC adapter (I recommend this as the VB sucks down batteries as we do oxygen) a headphone jack and a place to put your cartridge covers, that's about it.

Pros
Graphics sometimes have little effects that the SNES is unable to do.
Stereo sound is excellent.
Best. Controller. Ever
A few games that I love are on the system.

Cons
You call that 32-bit?!?! BWAHAHAHA
Only a couple must own games
0 Portability
Horrid stand
Kids can't play
1-player only

Buy/Rent/Avoid
I firmly believe that every gamer should experience the VB at least once. But borrow it from a friend folks, it's just not worth the purchase, unless you're into making homebrew games for it. From what I hear, there is a quite active VB underworld, where games are released to this day....

Borrow it or Avoid.

Reviewer's Score: 6/10, Originally Posted: 08/10/04