DRAGON WARRIOR 7 MONSTER PARK QUOTE LIST v1.0

Assembled by Victar, http://members.aol.com/sglkht
Read my Tekken, Mortal Kombat, and Paper Mario 2 fanfic!

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copyright.

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Do you not feel like investing the hours and hours of time required
to tame, search out, and speak to all 250+ monsters in Dragon
Warrior 7? Then this quote list is for you! Here is a complete
transcript of what ALL the monsters that can be sent to the
Monster Park have to say, in the Region 1/English-language
version of the game.

This will very probably be the only version of this guide. I'm not
planning any further updates or revisions. If you want to know
what monsters in the Japanese version say (and they probably do
say different things in some cases, since several of the English
version's quotes refer to American popular culture), you'd better get
yourself an imported copy of the game and a good Japanese-
English dictionary.

Every monster in the game has three quotes, and will say a random
one when you talk to it. As you can see, monster quips range from
sound effects and pleasantries, to puns and jokes, to threats and
incessant talk of eating people, to pop culture references and
proverbs. There are no game hints to be learned. Extra monsters
sent to the Monster Houses don't say anything new or different.

Some monsters address the Hero by name; I have put "Hero" with a
capital H where his name would be. I have also marked spelling or
punctuation errors in the monster dialogue with [sic], and added a
few of my own clarifying comments in [] brackets. Monsters are
listed in alphabetical order but subdivided into the portion of the
Monster Park where they can be found.

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PARK MEADOW

Barbarian: "I'll split you in two with this axe!"
"I demand a rematch. I slipped the last time we battled."
"Is it true that we can't fight here?"

Baskervil: "Arrroooo!"
"Grr! The conditions here are deplorable."
"Tell Mr. Monster we require the blood of a newborn calf to keep
our coat shiny."

CatMage: "Meow. What is it, meow?"
"Partake of the shade from my staggering intelligence as it towers
over you."
"Meeow! Meoow! Hack! Hack! Damn hairballs!"

Centbeast: "What? No, get off! Get off! You can't ride me!"
"I find pain quite agreeable. It tells me I am not yet dead."
"Violence has resolved more conflicts throughout history than
anything else."

Clawser: "I no longer get to ambush people and eviscerate them
with my claws. Instead they willingly come to gawk at me. Then I
eviscerate them."
"Hmm, you looked bigger when we fought before."
"You appear to be a reasonable fellow. Let me out and I won't eat
you."

Eggplaton: "Do not seek words of wisdom from me. I am an
eggplant."
"What has this world come to? Vegetables talking to humans!
When did humans learn to talk?"
"The eggplant plots and ponders, unbeknownst to the self-absorbed
humans."

Florajay: "Perhaps I will take root here for a while."
"I'm going to fly high enough to touch the sun."
"Self-pollination? Hmm, I suppose that my [sic] be possible."

GnuDevil: "Man builds cages for animals so that he may enjoy
them whenever it is convenient."
"Man is the true monster."
"How do you live with yourself?"

GoldSlime: "Remember the golden rule. He who has the gold,
makes the rules."
"Wealth isn't the most important thing in the world. It's heart that
matters most."
"Beauty provoketh thieves sooner than gold."

Healer: "I have a feeling that I may be the only monster here
willing to lay my hands upon you with the intent to heal."
[spell sound effect] "Time heals all wounds." Hero has been
healed! [not really]
"I'm impressed how you carry on with your journey, unclouded by
conscience, remorse, or delusions of morality."

Hulkagon: "We must learn to live together or we will all perish."
"Sometimes it's nice to lay down in the grass and just bask in the
sunshine. Give it a try. I promise I won't crush you beneath my
massive foot, leaving only a red smear in the green grass to
remember you by. Ahh, sunshine..."
"You are a sad, strange little human."

KingSlime: "I am surrounded by commoners."
"Hero, eh? No need to bow and scrape. Come closer."
"Fetch my bowl, knave! It's the King's bequest!"

Panther: "The idiosyncrasies of man amuse me. Then I just eat
him."
"Scratch my ears."
"Run around a little. I like to play with my food."

PomPomBom: "Pohmu, pohmu. Pohmu, pohmu."
"Boom. Blank stare."
"You don't want to know what's going on in my twisted mind."

RainHawk: "Why does it always rain on me?"
"I pity you. You will never know what it is like to soar among the
clouds."
"I miss the days of dive bombing humans and snatching their
precious weanlings."

Rosevine: "The scent of roses dances through the air."
"You have bloomed into steadfast adventurers. Smack! Smack!
Tasty!"
"Come even closer and smell my scent. Tee hee hee!"

SkyFrog: "Rib-rib-rib-rib."
"What could be more fearful than a frog seeking vengeance?"
"One day the sky will blacken with an army of SkyFrogs."

Slime: "Gaahhh! Don't hit me! Oh, sorry. Force of habit."
"Damn. People are always kicking my ass. What's that? What do
you mean, which end is my ass?"
"Sometimes, when Mr. Monster is asleep, I crawl in his mouth and
lay eggs."

SlimeNite: "Atop my noble steed, I shall smite all who oppose
me!"
"Sadly, I strike fear into the hearts of few."
"Damn slime keeps seeping through the cracks in my armor."

Venomworm: "I am a worm, and no man. A reproach of men and
despised of the people."
"The womb shall forget him, and the worm shall feed sweetly on
him."
"Remember that no matter what you accomplish in this life, one
day you will be food for the worms."

PARK GRAVEYARD (outside)

BludBeast: "Ohmmmmmm...."
"Wooooooh!"
"I will live forever. So far, so good."

BoltDevil: "Crackle crackle pop!"
"Rustle rustle rustle!"
"Pop, crackle, crackle!"

BoneRider: "Hoi! Want to team up with me and pillage the
countryside of its women?"
"Women from all around come crying out my name in ecstasy!
BoneRider! BoneRider!"
"Like my hat? The ladies like the feather!"

DarkThief: "Pitter patter pitter patter rustle."
"Oh, Hero, I'm so jealous of your vitality!"
"Wow, this is some kind of monster paradise!"

DeathGron: "Gurgle? Gurgle gurgle."
"Gurgle, gurgle!"
"Grgrgrggle!"

Devilite: "Perhaps I'll have a look around and see if anyone's laid
any eggs recently. They explode into a rainbow of colors if you
drop them from high enough."
"Hee hee hee! What kind of trouble awaits me today?"
"Don't look down on me just because I'm small!"

DumbiKing: "Hee hee hee!"
"Heh heh heh! Ahahahaha!"
"Yes, yes. I do hate you."
     
EvilArmor: "Nothing is so tangible as the duality of man."
"I'm conflicted about my feelings toward this place."
"Why don't you try me on for size?"

EvilWell: "Don't dirty the water with your filth, human."
"Lean over. No, a little more. I promise I won't let you fall in. Heh
heh heh."
"Heh heh heh! Let me introduce you to death! Water. I meant,
would you like some water? Heh heh. Death."

GigaMute: "Hoo! Hoh hoo!"
"Hoohoo?"
"Hoohoon!"

HellClown: "You sent me here to play the part of the fool for your
amusement. You are lucky I do not have a problem with that."
"Eh heh heh heh! You want to try, pal?"
"One, two, hee hee hee! One eyeball, two eyeballs."

Hork: "Oog...."
"Ahhhh! I see live people!"
"I'm looking for Kiefer's grave, so I can dance on it."

Niterich: "I'm strong!"
"I'm great!"
"I'm really special!"

Poucher: "Brrraaap!"
"No wonder I got caught. There's a Goddamn target on my chest!"
"Alright! Who the hell painted this big target on my chest?"

Putrbeast: "Gurg... gurgle...."
"Gag..."
"Spew!"

PutreMan: "Zzznork! Huh? What do you want?"
"Eh? You say something? My ears aren't what they used to be."
"My body is rotting nicely here! It must be the pleasant
atmosphere."

Stalker: "Well! I'm glad to see you're looking well!"
"Heh heh heh. This hatchet's nice and sharp, isn't it?"
"Hee hee hee! What a great place. I wish I could tell my friends.
Perhaps you could snare them for me?"

Swordbane: "Is there a mirror around here? My head hurts, and I
can't figure out why."
"Would you like to equip me? I'm not cursed. I promise."
"I've got a splitting headache."

ZombieEye: "Squish squish!"
"Aroooo! Aroooo!"
"Blorp!"

PARK GRAVEYARD (clock tower)

CurseLamp: "I finally rid myself of my master. He was weighing
me down."
"I find this place rather disagreeable, but I suppose we all must
accept the reality of the world with which we are presented."
"I haven't been rubbed the right way in a long time."

DarkMage: "Ha ha ha! Wouldn't you like to try some magic? It's
wonderful, I tell you!"
"Magic will give you the greatest of powers!"
"Hmph! Swinging swords around in battle is so archaic!"

DarkSanta: "What's in the bag, you ask? Shhh! It's a secret."
"You're not getting any presents from me!"
"I wonder if I can find anything good on the ground."

DeadNoble: "I will visit death upon this sad, desperate world."
"Remember the name Prince Weisnewski. For my face will be the
last you see in this world. But that is for another day."
"Do not forget to pick up a souvenir or two before you leave."

DorasBox: "Grin!"
"Touch the forbidden chest."
"This place is a treasury of malapropism."

EvilBook: "Come to flip through my pages?"
"Flip flip flip flip!"
"Be careful! You flip too fast! Don't tear my pages!"

EvilPot: "Hero peered into the pot. But there was nothing useful."
"Snicker snicker snicker!"
"Don't break me! Don't break me!"

EvlVulgar: "Rah?"
"Roar! Rah!"
"You got in here for free? Mr. Monster has no clue how to run a
business."

General: "A beard is the sign of a true knight. Have you ever
thought about growing one too?"
"I may be old in years, but I'm young at heart!"
"I want to live with pride and dignity."

Mimic: "..."
"Chomp!"
"Hee hee hee!"

NiteKing: "I hate the light of day!"
"At nightfall, the world becomes mine! Darkness is my very
lifeblood!"
"I want to make the whole world dark!"

ShadeNite: "..."
"Who's there, lurking amongst the shadows? Oh, it is merely
Hero."
"One day your soul will be mine."

WoeBottle: "You must be parched. Please, have a sip. I said drink,
damn it!"
"Come on. Do it. Taste my sweet, sweet nectar."
"Do you refuse to drink of me?"

WonderEgg: "Snicker, snicker!"
"Whew, it's kind of hot in here. Oh no, I'm becoming hard-boiled!"
"Crack. What was that?"
               
Zombie: "Should maybe take bath once in a while. Slurp!"
"Strop drooling if want to impress ladies. Slurp, slurp! Damn,
tongue fell out again."
"Sniff sniff! Buh-rains. Buh-rains. Knock, knock! Hollow. No buh-
rains."

Zombier: "Heh heh. I've started to drip and slide away in places."
"Heh heh. Rotting away is one of the finer pleasures of life. Or is it
death?"
"Sniff sniff! Good God! What is that smell? Is that soap?"

PARK MOUNTAIN

ApeBat: "Welcome, Hero. I sensed you were around."
"Here, taste this. Does my guano taste funny to you?"
"You and that old man are definitely unique. You're actually
friends with us."

Armorgon: "Growr! Growr!"
"Eeearrun?"
"The secret to my success is the shine of my armored hide."

BabyCloud: "My memory's a little cloudy. How did I end up here
again?"
"The tales of your exploits blow me away!"
"Wahoo! The skies belong to me! Wahoo!"

Babygoyle: "One day, your skull will be mounted on my
pitchfork!"
"'La la. One day, demons will rule. We'll use the blood of humans
as a wading pool!' Now you sing the chorus!"
"Baby demons need tenderness. Your flesh looks pretty tender."

Chargon: "To be prepared for war is one of the most effectual ways
of preserving peace."
"Hmm, I wonder the velocity at which I must charge in order to
shatter every bone in your body. You game to find out?"
"Stand right about there. Let me get a running start."

Clawbeast: "Kee kee kee!"
"Stand aside, before I slice you to ribbons."
"Want to test the adeptness of my talons? Run!"

CloudKing: "Fear not the man who fears God."
"Humans lack humility. Bow before your rightful king."
"There is no pleasure in conquest over the meek. That is why you
won."

CragDevil: "The greatest trick the Demon Lord ever pulled was
convincing the world he didn't exist."
"Only a fool would summon the Demon Lord."
"The devil is in the details."
     
Fuga: "Fascinating! A Monster Park that contains all the monsters
you've collected! A fitting tribute to the selfishness of man."
"I hate you guys. I hate you so very, very much. Words cannot
express how much I hate you guys."
"The park doesn't necessarily discriminate. It simply excludes
certain types of monsters."

Gigagoner: "Buuurrpp! Excuse me. Scholars always give me gas.
Hmm, I feel smarter already."
"Slurp! Bunny girls are tasty, but I always end up with hair on my
tongue!"
"Gulp! Grog is always good to wash down bartenders with!"

Golemuga: "....."
"Hmmph."
"Go away. Talking to me is like talking to a wall."

GuardDog: "Grrrr!"
"Howl! Bowww! Grrr!"
"Try to run. I'd like to see how long it takes to drag you down and
rip out your jugular."

HornRush: "Will you be my friend?"
"With my imposing physique, sharp horn, and regal mane, few are
willing to befriend me."
"Sometimes friends have to kill each other out of love. And then,
you know, eat the carcass."

LampGenie: "Monster Park? The lamp is my home."
"What is your wish?"
"With my turban wound just so, all is right with the world!"

Metabble: "Kyu! Kyu Kyu!"
"Pruk! Kyu Kyurr Kyu!"
"Kurrrr."

Metaly: "Rarely do humans look so intently at me. What can I do
for... Hey! You're just looking at your reflection aren't you?"
"Is one really alive if one cannot feel pain?"
"Please hurt me. Pain is good."

PigDemon: "Oink! All they bother to feed us around here is slop.
Oink!"
"Oink! I like this place, because I can eat until I'm stuffed. Oink!"
"You just can't bring yourself to look at me without picturing an
apple in my mouth, can you?"

StelDemon: "None can stand before me!"
"Yes, yes. Your suspicions are correct. You are much weaker than
me."
"My body has the strength of steel! Go on hit me! Oww, not there."

Wyvern: "It is man's nature to feast on the failed opportunities of
others."
"If you plan to die in battle, could you do it close by? I don't want
to fly far to pick on your bones."
"Could you at least wait for one of your party members to die
before coming here, so that I might feast on the remains?"

PARK MOUNTAIN (inside volcano)

Cerabus: "We can bite off both your arms at the same time!"
"I don't like to share with myself. Me neither."
"Don't bother talking to my other head. He's a fool. No, you're a
fool! Fool! Fool! Grrr! Grrr!"

ClayNite: "Dagu!"
"Daguu..."
"Dagu... Clay Man..."

DrakSlime: "Bee Kee Kee!"
"N-Kee!"
"Hello..."

Eggeron: "Don't egg me on!"
"Isn't the Monster Park egg-citing!"
"Sorry. We monsters get bored so we think of ways to 'pun'-ish
you."

FireCloud: "We go and burn all kinds of stuff! Wahoo!"
"We're gonna set it on fire! Wahoo!"
"Wahoo! Burn, baby, burn!"

FlameToad: "Cackle! Cackle! Yo!"
"Cackle! Har har! Cackle!"
"I see you monkeys have discovered fire."

Flamzard: "Moan."
"Perhaps I will sun myself on a rock somewhere."
"Ahh, dreaming about eating humans and basking in the warm
glow. This is life."

Gragoopi: "Shake hands! Shake hands with me!"
"Friends join hands, that's what I always say!"
"I have a long lifeline, don't you think?"

HellHawk: "Rowr!"
"Growl!"
"Sheww!"

Lithohead: "It's hot."
"Upsy-daisy!"
"Wow. Am I big?"

Magmaron: "Skritch skritch skritch... Scrape!"
"Blub...glug glug..."
"Is it hot in here, or is it just the burning lava?"

Plesiodon: "Roar!"
"Orr... Roar!"
"Rumble! Rumble! Rumble!"

Pummeler: "Clonk! Clonk!"
"Wham! Wham!"
"Power perceived is power achieved."

Red Sting: "Snap. Snap."
"Snap! Snap?"
"Snap!"

Revirock: "Rumble! Rumble!"
"Rumble! Rumble! Rumble!"
"Gotss! Gatss!"

PARK TOWER OUTSIDE

BeakRat: "Squeek, squeek."
"Itz hward to talk wid dis mouf!"
"Ma lawng tung mekks ot hawd ta twk."

JellyMan: "Drag... splat."
"Shlooopp... splat."
"Shloop, shlop."

LizrdBird: "Gurp!"
"Sss sss sss!"
"Sss?"

Pigady: "Voosh voosh."
"Aggoooo!"
"Grrph... grum..."

WellLure: "'La la. I'm just a WellLure! I'll never be an EvilWell,
not me! La la!'"
"Man does not appreciate the value of water until the well runs
dry."
"Me? Well, the well here is well."

WolfDevil: "Awooonn!"
"My wings are small, so I'd probably be better off taking the stairs
to the top of the tower."
"I wish I had my own ledge to perch upon. My wings are just going
to waste."

PARK TOWER 1F

Berserker: "Gyahahaha!"
"Welcome to the heart of darkness."
"Show me your neck! Bust out your neck! Hyieeeaa!"

Boarenger: "Oink oink!"
"Oink! I'm hungry! Feed me! Oink!"
"See my nose? Isn't it great?"

CureSlime: "Hello! Having fun adventures out there?"
"Being big is good! Yup!"
"Take care of your health. Don't do anything too dangerous!"

DarkArmor: "I live in the darkness."
"Shadows are my minions. Darkness is my kin. Gyahaha."
"Don't come too close. I'm dangerous. Heheheh."

EvlStatue: "Graaaawww! Zzrk zzchk ccrracck!"
"Groawl! Zzzrrkk!"
"Zrrrkkk! Crraacckk!"

Horseman: "I'm not cute, dang it! Fear me!"
"What? This is not a wooden horse! Hey, would you mind?"
"I'm a warrior! This is not a toy! It is a noble steed!"

MageArmor: "Hmph! I was raised well, you see."
"Do not speak to me."
"Please leave me alone."

Makainite: "The demon world is paradise, but this place is not
without its hellish charm."
"The ennui among the monsters is almost palpable."
"I plan to decorate these walls with the hides of humans."

MetlRider: "....."
"I'm the handsome, silent type."
"How would you like it if someone rode you around endlessly.
What? Good God, man! That was rhetorical question!" [sic]

Runger: "..."
"Grr!"
"Hmph!"

TrickBag: "Uheeheehee!"
"Look behind you! DarkArmor is attacking! Heh heh heh!
Dummy."
"Playing with your feeble minds is fun!"

PARK TOWER 2F

AnkHorn: "Who wants to try a smack from my hooves on for
size?"
"It only takes one thrust of my horns, and I'll take the strongest of
ya out!"
"Hyaaah! Come and get me, fools!"

Cannibox: "Slam slam slam!"
"Want to know what's inside?"
"Hero checked the treasure chest. Heh heh. I always wanted to say
that!"

ColumnMan: "....."
"Why hello! Welcome, Hero and friends."
"I shoulder a heavy burden in life."

Dumbira: "Come on. You're not Hero. Hero is big and strapping,
like myself."
"What am I sitting around here like a wimp for? I suppose it's
because that's what wimps do."
"I cannot be bought, and I cannot be threatened. But put the two
together and I'm your monster."

EvilBeast: "..."
"Gaha!"
"Since we all have the same name, it's difficult to hold a
conversation with other EvilBeasts. 'Hey, EvilBeast!' 'Oh,
EvilBeast! Hey! What are you up to?' 'I thinking about killing that
rotten EvilBeast.' 'What? You're going to kill me? You bastard!'
'No, no... I meant...' 'Hey, EvilBeast and EvilBeast! What are you
guys up to?' 'EvilBeast threatened to kill me!' 'What are you talking
about? I just got here and asked what you were up to. How could I
have threatened to kill you?' Arrgh!"

MadBook: "Think fast or I'll close on your hand! Heheheh!"
"You don't know what it's like being locked up in here with these
illiterate buffoons."
"Hero - n. Weak adventurer, reknown for small brain. See also,
coward."

MageLipsy: "Mmm! Stop staring at me! Teehee!"
"Hey there, big boy, how about a kiss?"
"Smooch!"

Necrobal: "Hah hah ha!"
"Gyahahaha! If it isn't Hero! Have you come to visit me?"
"It's fun here. So many friends to make!"

ProtoMech: "DEFECTS NONE. COMMENCE ACTIVITY."
"GOAL UNCONFIRMED. REQUIRE INPUT. REQUIRE
INPUT."
"TARGET CONFIRMED. DIE! DIE! DIE!"

TigerMage: "Gyahaha! Just try and take on my spells!"
"Meow? Everything purrfect with you?"
"Purr purr! Darn it! Old habits die hard!"   

PARK TOWER 3F

Bugbear: "We're demons of perverseness. You'd best not take us at
our word."
"Hey, do you enjoy doing this kind of thing? Eeheehee!"
"This place is so peaceful, and there's plenty of food. You get out
of shape after a while!"

CosmoBog: "Ta-da! I am the CosmoBog, one of the incarnations
of beauty!"
"Heh! How's this for striking a pose?"
"I am currently accepting applications to join my fan club! Won't
you join?"

DragonMan: "Hey there, Hero. Come to pick up my droppings? I
left a pile for you over there."
"Part man, part dragon. All monster! Gaaoohhrr!"
"Gaff gaff. Your muscles are stringy, like a girl's, Hero!"

Druinlord: "I want you to prepare better food than this for me."
"Hmh? Is this the best room you could find? How antiquated."
"Having come this far, I'm not sure if this was really a good idea
after all."

FoggyPot: ".........."
"Potto potto!"
"Rumble rumble..."

JewelBag: "Twinkle, twinkle, twinkle!"
"Shara...Sharalan!"
"Sharalan!"

MagicPost: "People are merely unthinking posts."
"I think, therefore I am... a post."
"Given that I am a post, how can I possibly move? This is one of
life's great eternal mysteries."

MagWyvern: "Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack!"
"Eek! Eek!"
"Monsters all look the same to you, don't they?"

WingTiger: "Roar, roar!"
"Those of you who think you know everything are beginning to
annoy those of us who do."
"Oh, I just remembered. You're boring, and I have lgs. [sic]"

WoePriest: "Let there be light!"
"God is with me."
"Defend me, oh God!"

PARK TOWER 4F

Disguiser: "I am shadow."
"I am form without shape."
"None still live who know my true form."

Enchanter: "Well! hello there, Hero. I am so happy to see you
again."
"It's thanks to you, your friends, and Mr. Monster, that we have this
peaceful existence now."
"A supplicant is one who gives devotions. That means prayers to
the gods, just so you know."

Esterk: "Am I evil?"
"What is evil? I do not know. I do not understand your limited
human designations."
"Is it wrong to eat the young of others?"
               
MadPot: "Heehee, I've got the munchies something fierce."
"Put your hand inside! Go on. It's okay. Eheehee!"
"C'mon, put your hand inside! I'm hungry already! Heeheehee!"

Ogreling: "Ohh! Ha-yah!"
"Hmm? Ha-yah!"
"Take this metal sphere!"

PinkOrc: "Burble burble burble..."
"Well, hello, people. It's good to see you all looking so well,
burble."
"We owe a lot to Mr. Monster, burble."

Satanmail: "Trapped within this cursed armor lies the soul of a
noble knight."
"In pursuit of great power, I foolishly forfeited what meant the
most to me."
"I am destined to walk the plains for eternity."

SnowBat: "Mm! Hmggg! Erggg!"
"Yes!"
"Staring contest!"

Thunderat: "Hoooo!"
"I'm itching something awful!"
"I'm just ripping and tearing!"

Vulgarian: "Rowlf!"
"Awooh! Ahwaooh!"
"Sorry I didn't mean to jump on you. Sometimes I get a little
excited."

WingDraco: "Growl! Roar!"
"Gyao!"
"Grrrr! Roar!"

PARK TOWER 5F

BabyDevil: "I may only be a baby now, but the day will soon come
when I can spawn my own devilish schemes upon the humans."
"You humans will feel my wrath in due time!"
"You shall be the first to perish when the time comes."

DemoKing: "Hmm, I believe I have taken a liking to this place."
"This park would be perfect, if only it were adorned with the
bodies of shackled humans."
"Where is my loyal throng of minions? Where are the flames to
gently caress my face?"

Devilash: "My swordsmanship is the fastest around! Can you even
see my sword swinging?"
"Ha, hiyaa! Aiieeeyaaahh!"
"My sword technique is unstoppable."

EvilClown: "Lost sheep, what brings you to our temple? Yeah
right, hahahaha!"
"Death to God! Glory to evil!"
"Atone for your sins! The day of judgment is near! Haaahahahaha!"

GoldKid: "Who knows how much longer we can take advantage of
Mr. Monster by living here?"
"It's great to be here, enjoying the sun glinting off my face!"
"I'm worth my weight in gold!"

KilStar: "Clank?"
"Clank, clonk!"
"Roll, roll."

MetalKing: "Ahh, peasants."
"Hmm, I usually manage to run away in time. How did you
possibly beat me?"
"What do you wish to request from the MetalKing? Yes, yes I see.
Your plight has failed to hold my insterest [sic]. Begone!"

Quixotron: "Ha Ha Ha! Leave spearing to me!"
"We're off, faithful steed! Giddyup!"
"Have you heard of the 'Ladies' Monster of Monster Park'? Well,
that would be me! Hahaha!"

RedGrunt: "Winners are silent, and losers have nothing but
excuses."
"Wisdom is the most important asset for battles! Defeat awaits all
fools!"
"Sometimes, losing is preferable to winning!"

SkyDevil: "I can go anywhere in the world with these wings!"
"Hmm! The world below is at peace again today."
"I own the skies! You knew that, right?"

SkyHunter: "I'm an expert bowman. Hold still. Steady, steady!"
"Hold still, human. It's much more difficult to hit a moving target."
"Sometimes I think these owls drop me on purpose. 'Who? Who?'
Stop saying that! You know damn well who I'm talking about!"

Slemperor: "Yes, yes, you may come here."
"Kneel! Bow down before me and pay homage to your lord and
master!"
"Empires may crumble, the world may turn to ice, but my
kingdom, this glorious Monster Park, will stand until the end of
time!"

PARK SEA

Bone Fish: "Many are the stories that have been told of the
fearsome Amitt and Borkano. [Maribel's and Hero's fishermen
fathers.]
"The dreaded Harvest is coming." [Fishbel's celebration]
"I've got a bone to pick with you!"
     
Confupeng: "Huh?"
"Flap flip flap flip!"
"Flipflap flipflap flipflap."

DarkSnail: "Victory is reserved for those willing to pay its price."
"A monster's status within the hordes of the Demon Lord is
irrelevant. If he has not put his life on the line at least once, he has
cause for shame."
"Only a warrior chooses pacifism. Others are condemned to it."

DeathCrab: "Want to go for a swim together?"
"Crabs are normally just a temporary annoyance, easily dealt with.
But catch me and you will know true agony."
"No, keep talking. Really, I'm looking right at you."

EvilDiver: "My life has felt so adrift since arriving here."
"Food? Sit and beg? Those better be mariner snacks behind your
back."
"Do I do any tricks? Climb into my mouth and I'll slowly digest
you for hundreds of years. What, no takers?"

Guartle: "......"
"It does not matter how slowly you go, so long as you do not stop."
"Invincibility lies in the defense, the possibility of victory in the
attack."

EvlAnchor: "I have become stolid and complacent since arriving
here."
"One day, you will feel the crushing weight of defeat upon your
chest."
"The 'old ball-and-chain'? Your quips fail to amuse me, human."

EvlTurtle: "I bet I could snap you in two... I mean, how's it going?"
"Maybe I should party with you in your quest. EvlTurtle? No, no.
That's just...a name. I'm good. Really. GoodTurtle."
"Not all humans are the same. It's what on the inside that counts.
Some have really tasty innards."

FrogKing: "Hmm, I don't do too well in salt water. But I rule all
else! Volcanic island? No, ash clogs my pores. But all else..."
"You request an audience with me? Oneside, human. I must finish
licking my eyeballs."
"I rule over every frog in the world. Sadly, that means nothing. To
fear me is to be a fool."

GreatMerm: "Wahaha. The fools are back."
"What you want? Me busy!"
"No have time to talk to surface dwellers!"

MultiEyes: "I've only got eyes for you."
"Goddamnit! My eyes are drying out again."
"Succeed and there's never anyone to see it. Fail and all eyes are
upon you."

Octogon: "Schwipp schwipp."
"You only have two arms? How do you manage?"
"Withdraw yourself from my sight, silly 'two-armed' man."

Piranhan: "Gnashgnash..."
"Clakaclakaclak!"
"These teeth can peel the flesh off an animal in mere moments.
Care for a dip?"

PutreFish: "Glup glup glup!"
"Why does everyone seem to keep their distance from me?"
"What the hell is that smell?"

Rush Fish: "Glub glub..."
"What's your hurry?"
"Haste makes waste."

SeaDragon: "Water is utopia to one such as me."
"Aaah, I miss the taste of sailors."
"Turn your backs for a moment, and I'll drown every last member
of your party, one by one."

Seahorser: "Splash splash. Humans shouldn't be horsing around in
the Monster Park."
"I'm more dragon than horse!"
"I can hardly reign [sic] in the excitement of being here!"

SeaLipsy: "Smooch? Good God! Can't a monster go about his daily
life without being harassed by humans?"
"Smooch? Your human slobber is like a wet, sticky paste. Hmm,
it's kind of nice."
"Geez, your lips are really salty."

Shelgator: "Chomp chomp."
"My teeth can snap shut with an enormous amount of pressure.
Some say they can crush anything."
"Go ahead. Put your head in my mouth."

Starfish: "Twinkle, twinkle?"
"Starfish are the scourge of the sea! We lay there and, you know,
look really menacing!"
"Cut off an arm, and two will take its place. I cannot be stopped!
Fall to your knees, human! Gyahaha!"

Varanus: "I let you beat me."
"It is not enough that I succeed, others must fail."
"The measure of success is merely the jealousy of the
malcontents."

PARK PLATEAU

Andreal: "Scratch my belly, human."
"Clean up my poop, human."
"Get my food, human."

Babydrak: "The look in your eyes is chilling."
"It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Then it's just fun."
"When I grow old, I'll line my nest with the remains of humans."
               
ButchMan: "Axe...slice! Everyone...tiny pieces! Eheheheh!"
"Stand...still! Must...sharpen! Gyehehe!"
"Heheh! Axe...chop! Eat...people! Clean...axe!"

Crestpent: "Slither, slither."
"Human bones are brittle within my ever-tightening grip!"
"Perhaps you wish to be released from this mortal coil?"

DrakMetal: "If I wasn't so apathetic, I'd eat you."
"The last person that locked me up - Urrpp!"
"Ha ha ha! Funny human! Ha ha ha! One day I will stomp you! Ha
ha ha!"

Earwinger: "I'm swimming with disease."
"Flying vermin will one day unite to take over this world."
"My ears are getting tired."

FairyRat: "Squeak, squeak!"
"You! You killed my family!"
"Why bother sparing my life? You've taken everything else away
from me!"

Hellbane: "No need to burn our bridges. Heh heh."
"Those who use my bridge will find themselves banished forever to
the netherworld."
"Roarrr! You used my bridge, soulless human? Ehh, I forgive you."

Moai: "Hmm, I've been thinking about you."
"Stare in awe at my enormous purple head! Damn it, don't touch
it!"
"Do not mistake my immobility for weakness."

Panickle: "Screeech! What's that? Who's there? Scraareech!"
"I'm afraid I don't know anything."
"Scrreeeech! I think the other monsters are out to get me."

Parasnail: "You seem to be slow of mind."
"Things are slow-going here."
"Behold as I very slowly make my escape."

PlatKing: "If you have a second, could you polish me?"
"Look at me! Feel the sting of humility as you gaze at beauty of a
caliber that you will never achieve!"
"Monarchies are not without accomplishment. They have managed
to distribute poverty equally."

PodFightr: "How goes your futile quest, Hero?"
"Hyaaah! I may be small, but I prove to be a formidable foe!"
"Enemies rarely expect it when I crawl into one of their bodily
orifices and hack them to pieces from the inside!"

PodHero: "You're rather small for a hero."
"I may not look it, but I am indeed a hero."
"Sometimes I worry about being labeled a hero among a species of
cowardly monsters."

PodMage: "Great size does not make one great."
"Size is irrelevant. Magic can fell the largest of foes."
"I'm meditating now. Please don't speak to me."

PodPriest: "Why are we here?"
"I'm afraid the wounds that cut you the deepest cannot ever be
healed."
"I believe God is a small, oddly colored deity."

PuppetMan: "Man throws away his whole life working for the
wealthy. I think you're the one whose strings are being pulled."
"Life is predicated on the whims of others."
"I had a woman once, but she was far too controlling."

Swordaroo: "Check out these bouncing beauties! Swish! Swish!"
"It is wrong to sheeth [sic] blades as fine as mine."
"Most don't even realize they're dead until after the second slice!
Swish! Swish!"

WarTiger: "Eye of the tiger, Hero, eye of the tiger."
"Monsters are willing to die for war, but not for peace. That is as it
should be."
"War doesn't determine who's right, only who's left."

WellGhost: "'Welcome to Monster Park.'"
"'Monster Park is the happiest place in the world.'"
"My life is hollow and empty. Oh, I mean 'Welcome to Monster
Park.'"

PARK FOREST

CactiBall: "Oh, you're here. Yeah, yeah. I was on pins and needles.
Heh, never heard that before."
"Hey, baby. Come a little closer, so I can prick you."
"The other day I saw a harem of buxom women surrounding an
oasis. Alas, it was just a mirage."

Deathgon: "Good to see you. I haven't tasted the flesh of humans in
weeks."
"Only one thing is certain. I hate you with every tired muscle in my
little Dragon body."
"You put me in this place. But I am not bitter. I'm just consumed
by a gnawing hate that's eating away at my gut until I can taste the
bile in my mouth."
                       
DragonKid: "Here's looking at you, Hero."
"At least you had the heart not to slay me."
"I suppose I can breath [sic] a sigh of relief. Sigh... Foomph! Oh,
God! Oh, God! My wing's on fire! My wing's on fire!"

DragonWoo: "Sniff sniff! Something smells good! Ahhh!
Humans!"
"It's human nature for man to fear what he does not know. That's
why I get to know humans before I eat them."
"Behind every good man, there is a good woman. Two good
humans are usually enough to fill me up. Burp!"

EvlMantis: "It's interesting how you show no regard for removing
me from my natural habitat."
"I pray for your salvation."
"Let us bow our heads in prayer. Hey! How am I going to slice
your head off if you won't bow your head in prayer?"

FloatTree: "Whenever I find an area lacking in nutrients, I uproot
and fly somewhere new."
"Yes, I do realize that I am a depressingly pathetic monster."
"My grossly exaggerated eyeball can indeed see you standing
before me. I'm just ignoring you."

Forester: "Don't mind my tail. It twitches for no reason."
"I must thank you, Hero. I never imagined a place such as this
existed. Mr. Monster is surprisingly nice."
"Yeah, I'll probably end up eating Mr. Monster."

HornBeast: "Damn, I'm horny. Grin!"
"Leave me alone, unless you want me to gore you with my horns!"
"Damn, I'm horny. No, not like that!"

MadPlant: "The most beautiful of flowers usually have thorns!
Teehee!"
"Gahaha! I'll eat you right up!"
"A day without sunshine is like, um, night."

Meranza: "Me hungry."
"Me hungry. You tasty. Me happy."
"Me look plump and delicious, but me bite back," [sic]

RedSlime: "Where's that irksome blue Slime?"
"Blue Slimes are the hidden shame of the Slime family."
"Humans always use those lousy blue slimes to get battle
experience early on. Then when they're strong enough, they come
after us."

SheepDuck: "Kwak Kwak!"
"I'm the black sheep of the monsters."
"You lead us here like lambs to slaughter."

ShieldOgr: "Bad guys here? Crush bad guys! Crush!"
"Rarr! Me strong! Me powerful! Me everything!"
"Me crush all with this shield! Crush all!"

Squidgore: "My skin's drying out. Would you mind gently
massaging my tentacles for me?"
"My skin's drying out. Would you mind gently massaging my
tentacles for me? Ahh! Damn it, I said my tentacles!"
"Splooge! Oh, God! I got so excited, I shot ink all over you!"

TailApe: "Eeep?"
"Eeep eeep."
"Would you mind pulling the bugs out of my matted fur? Ahh!
Don't just throw them on the ground! You're wasting food!"

TongueRat: "Slurrp!"
"Come here. I want to lick you."
"The plague is coming."

TreeGuard: "I cringe at the thought of withering away here."
"Through hard work and dicipline, [sic] one can become as strong
as a tree!"
"You'd think that these three owls could carry my weight. Yet here
I am, practically being dragged across the ground."

Tyranodon: "This place is paradise. If I hunger, Mr. Monster brings
me food."
"This place is paradise. If I lay droppings, Mr. Monster gets down
on his knees and cleans it up."
"This place is paradise. Hmm, I desire females. I wonder if Mr.
Monster can handle that as well."

VenomBird: "Your venomous way swill one day come back to bite
you."
"Humans ruffle my feathers."
"Life spent inside a cage. So this is what sounds like when doves
cry."

WarBoar: "Snort! Snort! Grrnnn!"
"What do you intend to defeat with those paltry pig-stickers?"
"You're such a boar."

PARK DESERT

Armorpion: "Shuffle, shuffle, crunch, crunch!"
"Snap! Crunch!"
"Snap! Snap!"

Banegaroo: "Boing! Boing!"
"Grrr?"
"Grrr!"

Blaster: "Shuuu..."
"Hani hani!"
"I am the master!"

BoltWorm: "Chit! Chatt Chatt!"
"I'm shocked to see you here! What's that? Worms don't have eyes?
Damn you, Hero. Your logic has bested me once again."
"My personality is truly electrifying."

Budoo: "Did you summon me, master?"
"One could say I'm high-spirited. Heh heh heh."
"The tragedy of life is the slaying of beautiful dreams by the ugly
face of reality."

BudooLamp: "Pshew!"
"Great Budu! Great Budu!"
"You claim success? That is wishful thinking at its worst."

JunkMech: "CREAK, CREAK. ARE YOU MY MASTER?"
"WHY? WHY WAS I PROGRAMMED TO FEEL PAIN?"
"PLEASE. DEACTIVATE ME."

LizardMan: "Lizardman is as sly as a duck."
"Bring me my cheese dip, mendicant!" [a Groo the Wanderer
reference]
"You don't have a tail? Man is so unevolved."

MagJaguar: "Get your filthy paws off me, human."
"How can you continue to live in a society that embraces and
nurtures apathy as if it were a virtue?"
"Success depends more on drive than it does on intelligence. That's
why we have so many stupid leaders."

Mantipion: "Snicker snack, snicker snack!" [Jabberwocky/Alice in
Wonderland reference]
"Snicker snack?"
"There is no cause, for you to pause, unless you're admiring my
claws, which have no flaws."

Needlon: "Click! Click Click!"
"Dans! Dans! Dans! Dans!"
"This is my poker face."

NumbSlime: "Biri Birri!"
"Bibi riri!"
"I've grown numb to the abuse inflicted upon us here."

OrcDevil: "Snort! Hee hee hee!"
"My pleasure isn't that easy to satisfy! Hee hee!"
"Hee hee hee! You'll have to give me better feed than that!"

Pigmon: "Ho hoo! It is I, the great evil! Bugeh!"
"Even the Demon Lord kneels in my presence! Bugeh!"
"Bugeh! Don't stare at me like that! Bugeh!"

SheepBird: "Caw! Caw! Caw!"
"Caww?"
"Howl!"

WhiteFuga: "Bessassar!"
"Fuga fuga fuga bessar!"
"Man for the sake of making a living forgets to live."

Wormspec: "I've got my eye on you! Actually, I've got an eye on
everyone."
"Staring contest, anyone?"
"Staring Contest Rules - All of my eyes have to blink at the same
time in order for me to lose. Loser gets eaten."
          
WreckMan: "This morning star is precious to me. We've crushed
more skulls together than I can count."
"Get ready for the morning star! Swoosh swoosh swoosh!"
"One hundred times, every day! Swing that morning star, and get
those bodies in shape!"

PARK SWAMP

Babble: "You got a little something in your nose. Heh."
"This is a great place to live."
"What? No, I am not the vomitous remains of some other, stronger
monster!"

CancerMan: "Crabby today, are you?"
"I've seen your sort a lot. Brave adventurers? Heh, no. Desperate
humans grasping at straws."
"Is this place everything I thought it would be? No, no, I like it."

DemonToad: "Evilribbit! Evilribbit!"
"Licking my back will get you nowhere."
"All I ask for in life is a lilypad to call my own and conquest over
humans lead [sic] by the demon armies of destruction. Ribbit."

EvilViper: "Ssss!"
"Ssss! Take a bite from the apple."
"Through the exploitation of others' hardship, you seem to have
slithered your way into the public consciousness."

Goopi: "How about giving me a hand?"
"Rock, paper, scissors?"
"What is the sound of one hand clapping?"

HelKaiser: "This place may be filled with tortured souls, but it's
just not the same as home."
"Violence, like life, is always crude and distorted."
"The Demon Lord finds work for idle hands."

HornSnail: "Glooop gloooop...."
"The sun is brutal upon my delicate skin."
"Thank you for sending me here. Some brutes consider my kind a
delicacy."

IronTurt: "Snore snore..."
"They are naive to think that we have been domesticated in any
way by being put here. We will rise up and regain our freedom!"
"One day the monsters will rise up, with my iron shell before them
as a shield, and they will cry out for freedom! Revolution!"

Lipsy: "Many may conquer with swords, but one is more easily
conquered by a kiss."
"Gimme a kiss!"
"Please, I beg of you, a kiss before dying."

MadFalcon: "Flap flap! Squawk squawk!"
"Mad? No, no. I'm afraid my genius is just misunderstood."
"I'm always living on a wing and a prayer."

MudDoll: "Gloop gloop."
"Shamed in battle by humans. I'm all dried up."
"How do you stay so clean?"

MuddyMan: "Slurp, slorp."
"Blook blook."
"Man has arisen from the mud to accomplish much."

SkulBlade: "Don't get too close, or I'll poke your eye out!"
"Sssslice! Lemme make a bigger cut! Hee heee!"
"Lemme cut some more before I rust up! Hold still."

VenomHork: "I don't feel so... Blarrgh! Oh, geez, sorry. Heh, you
can keep that."
"Oooorrgh! Geez, I think I just hacked up a Babble."
"Wait, wait, don't step... Ooh! Maybe you should wash those off,
huh?"

PARK CAVE ENTRANCE

Broadaxer: "Man who fights with woman all day gets no piece at
night."
"Mind if I sharpen my blade on your skull, Hero?"
"Hmm, this place is somewhat social. Demented and sad, but
social."

Demranger: "You do realize that by touching me, you have signed
your own death warrant."
"Women the world over speak in hushed tones about my balls of
steel."
"Immoral is probably the wrong word to describe monster
behavior. I prefer unethical."

Dragon: "Rooaaarrrr!"
"Many knights have sought to slay me. The considerate ones bring
swords. They're much easier to pick my teeth with afterwards."
"Knights are crunchy on the outside, but soft and chewy on the
inside."

FoFighter: "Don't you have more important things to do than stare
at me?"
"My might is unparalleled."
"Hero, tell me which boulder to lift, and I will lift it. That boulder
over there? I'm afraid that boulder is much too big. How about a
smaller one?"

FooHero: "It doesn't feel right without four of us in a row."
"I'm afraid my heroic deeds far outweigh anything you've ever
done."
"Only the toughest warriors use leaves for armor! No! Don't crush
me!"

FooMage: "A monster park? The world has indeed taken a turn for
the surreal."
"A monster park? The hypocrisy of humans knows no bounds,
Hero."
"I wonder if I'll get in trouble if I use magic here."

FooPriest: "Hero, God has favored us with your presence once
again!"
"Honesty is the key to any relationship. If you can fake that, you're
set."
"Have you been hurt? I don't know what I would do if you were to
succumb to a horrible death!"

Gerion: "Growl... Snaaarrl!"
"It is wrong to cage a majestic beast such as me."
"Hmph. My claws have grown dull. Lean closer so I can sharpen
them. Swipe!"

HangedApe: "Eep, eep! Touch the monkey! Touch him!"
"How would you like to pet a HangedApe? No, no, you fool, that's
too fast! Stroke me gently, gently. Ahh, yes, that's it."
"I've been hanging around here for too long. The monsters have
taken to throwing their own feces at each other."

HellGiant: "I no longer need look for food. A fresh batch of
humans comes by on a fairly regular basis."
"So bored. Hmm, I haven't been on a murderous rampage in a
while."
"It is an undignified fate, to die in such a place."

HellGuard: "Welcome. Eheh, nice weather, eh?"
"The road of good intentions is paved with hell."
"If you're ever lost, just ask for me. I can show you the way to hell!
Gyahaha!"

Hunter: "Hey, it's Hero. I want to axe you a few questions."
"Aiieee! Oh, I mistook you for a more worthy foe. I didn't think
you'd just crumple into a ball, like a little girl."
"So the hunter finally became the hunted. Oh, I mistook you for a
more worthy foe. I didn't think you'd just crumple into a ball, like a
little girl."

IronKid: "You think sending monsters here will gain you their
friendship? Don't hold your breath."
"You're like a breath of fresh air around here. Sniff! Aaaahh!
Foomph! Oh geez, did I singe you a little there?"
"Your body hair disgusts me. It's so unwieldy. Mmm, kind of tasty,
though."

MageStar: "Are they going to feed us? The other monsters are
beginning to look at me funny."
"Feel the unkempt fury of my fantastic StarSpin!"
"The best revenge is living well. Hmm, there's no chance of that."

Savagemon: "Hate humans."
"Beat humans. Drag humans. Feed on humans."
"Geehee...geehee! Slay humans. Look humans."

SlimeWing: "Cheepoo!"
"Spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin."
"Ooh, dizzy...lost... hurt...confused..."

WoodyEye: "It's hard being a one-eyed monster."
"I've got my eye on you. Arrgh! Puns are the tools of simpletons!"
"No, keep talking. I'm not sending my roots under the ground as we
speak, in order to snap your neck from behind. Trust me."

PARK CAVE 1F

Babbleoon: "Stretch! Stretch! I don't want to pull anything when
I'm in combat!"
"Ptooiee! Ptooiee! Ptooiee! Ptooiee! Ptooiee! There, that should be
all of them."
"So the Monster Park is great, huh? I'd say that you were full of hot
air, but we both know you're really just full of crap."

Behemoth: "Look at my massive muscles! They pulsate in an
entrancing fashion!"
"Marvel at the glistening sweat dripping from my muscles! Shall I
flex for you?"
"Bow down as my muscles ripple you into submission!"

Bombcrag: "Stare."
"Smirk!"
"Maybe I should just kill us both and end all of our misery."

Curer: "I admire your purity."
"There is no cure for the human condition."
[spell noise] "Could you lick some of the mucus out of my gill
flaps? I'll heal you if you do." Hero has been healed! [not really]

Dragoner: "Rooarrmph!"
"Gyargyargyar!"
"Hmm, in the park we are sentient, yet in battle we are mindless
savages. Such blatant inconsistencies have marred your whole
adventure."

GigaDraco: "Hm? Who is it that asks for me?"
"One day this entire world will be covered in darkness."
"I'm hungry. Can you spare one of your party members?"

Gron: "Good to see you. Red carpet? No, that's just my tongue
you're standing on."
"It's refreshing to meet someone with little concern for their
appearance."
"I'm up to my neck in problems."

Imp: "He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is
enlightened."
"Chee, chee! Even with these wings, its' [sic] hard to keep upright
with this massive head of mine."
"When I'm not using my massive head to ponder the imponderable,
I smash rocks with it. Who are you, again?"

Moosedon: "Remind Mr. Monster that I am a strict vegetarian, and
I adamantly refuse to eat the meat slurry he has been serving us."
"Hmm? I suppose my face does somewhat resemble a phallic
symbol."
"Remind Mr. Monster that I require bottled water, not this well
dreck that he has been serving me, and that he is a sad and lonely
man who runs a park for monsters who detest him."

NailMan: "A man who won't die for something is not fit to live."
"Civilize the mind, but make savage the body."
"That which doesn't kill me, makes me stronger! You seen my
water dish?"

RhinoKing: "Baboom baboom - baboom baboom!"
"Grumph!"
"Grumph! The stampede of humans never ends."

RockGolem: "Snore... Crunch! Crunch!"
"Life on the inside hardens a monster."
"Never hit a man with a family. Hit him with something much
bigger and heavier."

Smoocher: "Smooch!"
"Damn cold sores."
"I'm tired of kissing up to you. Just leave me alone."

Thornmole: "Dig, dig, dig."
"Prick prick!"
"I could use a hug. Oh, sorry. You're bleeding pretty profusely
now, aren't you?"

PARK CAVE 2F

BoltRat: Zrrhhkk! Crraacck!"
"Squuek!"
"Squeek, squeek. Are you still reading this drivel?"

DarkDwarf: "Hey, Hero. For once, I wish that someone would look
up to me."
"Hi ho, hi ho? I'll chop you in two for such an insult!"
"Whistle while I work? I'll whistle while I feast on your rancid
carcass!"

Drakorpse: "Damn, my eyeball popped out again. Mind putting that
back in for me? Aah, there we go. Damn, popped out again."
"After life seemed to stretch endlessly before me, I welcomed the
chance to die and rot in the grave. Looks like that's not gonna
happen."
"Sometimes I lay awake and ask myself what keeps me going.
Then I realize that I'm an undead creature of the night and just go
to sleep."

Goldman: "It looks like I'll be living out my golden years here."
"I've got a heart of gold. Your heart is more of a bloody mass of
tissue."
"Hey, hey! I don't care how poor you are! Stop trying to chip off a
piece of my hide!"

MageImp: "Teeheehee! Need something from the 'Great One'?
Teeheehee!"
"Ecch! What foul magic has cursed you to live life looking like
that?"
"Kyeehee! The grotesqueness of humans is spell-binding!"

OgreKing: "You're not supposed to feed the monsters, but come a
little closer anyway."
"If Mr. Monster tried to tell me what to do, I'd say, 'Get back in the
kitchen and bring me my meal!' Um, you won't tell him I said that,
will you?"
"I guess I'm pretty cowardly after all."

SmileRock: "Nyah! Nyah! Smirk."
"Grin!"
"Never trust a smiling monster."

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