Review by Shinichi
"News Flash: Superheroes fail to save bad game!"
Before we begin, I'd like to deliver a simple summary: This game bites. Now, if you're still in doubt as to the real quality, or want to know why this game is so bad, please read on.
Graphics:4/10 - The graphics are, well, pretty bad. They do their job well enough, as you can tell that odd collection of pixels looks a bit like Iron Man, or Vision, or Random Goon #34, but they are by no means a strong point in the game. There are also some graphics that accompany each stage's title, and those aren't too bad.
Sound:3/10 - The sounds in this game (aside from the mildly funny sounds you see when you hit something, such as 'PLAM!') are low-quality and really annoying after a while. Poor voice sampling, sub-midi quality music tracks, and generally bad SFX will drive you to mute your TV. When you hit someone, it sounds like someone swinging a fly swatter around, rather than any kind of contact noise. Also, expect to hear the grainy cry of 'Arrg!' a lot, due to your character getting kicked around so much.
Controls:5/10 - Controls are pretty standard, but one glaring exception is that, when moving diagonally, you must STOP COMPLETELY to move in any other direction. This makes dodging attacks even harder than it already would have been. The jump button's reliability is also slightly dodgy (though it might just be my controller).
Gameplay:2/10 - Here lies the low point of the game. First off, the 'heroes' you play as are total wimps. The punches you throw fail to stun the enemies in any way, throwing seems totally random, and the ranged attacks do little damage. Further, any attack will knock you over, and the 'blink period' lasts only as long as it takes to get up, allowing for some very cheap hits by enemies. Have I mentioned the controls don't help? They don't. Enemies will shoot, punch, chop, grab, and generally whoop you, while you struggle to get in a punch (which doesn't stop even the weakest thug from kicking you in the face while you do it) or blast. The final nail in the coffin is that you have a maximum of 5 lives to finish the whole game! You will lose an average of 2 lives per level due to inordinately high damage done by everything you meet, so the best you can hope for is level 3. (That's as far as I've gotten, anyway.)
Rent or Buy? - If you see this game for sale anywhere, buy it, if only to immediately destroy it and save anyone from the pain and annoyance of trying to play it. If you see anyone trying to rent it, advise them that they may be driving away potential customers by even possessing such a thing.
Overall:3 - Stay away from this game, unless you need to even out a table, or a paperweight, or something.
Reviewer's Rating: 1.5 - Bad
Originally Posted: 06/12/03, Updated 06/12/03
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