Strong Bad's Cool Game For Attractive People: Homestar Ruiner Walkthrough
Published for the Nintendo Wii
Released August 12, 2008

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|                            TABLE OF CONTENTS                               |
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        1. Basic Game Stuff [BSIC]
                a. Controls
                b. The Characters
        2. Walkthrough
                a. The House of Strong [HOS1]
                b. The Track [TRK1]
                c. Marzipan's [MRZ1]
                d. Bubs' Conses5ion Stand [BCS1]
                        a. Photo Booth
                e. Back At The Track [TRK2]
                        a. The Locker Room
                f. The House Of Strong Revisited [HOS2]
                g. Back At Marzipan's [MRZ2]
                h. Everyone Loves The Track [TRK3]
                i. The House Of Strong & Homestar [HOS3]
                j. The King Of Town's Castle [KOT1]
                k. Let's Get Rid Of Homestar [BKTR]
        3. Other Achievements [ACHV]
                a. Teen Girl Squad Cards
                        a. Properly Winning The Game
                b. Clothes
                c. Snake Boxer Pages
                d. Obscure Trophies
                        a. Exploration
                        b. Hedge Clipper
                        c. Nuisance
                        d. Strong Sad
        4. Entire Game Checklist [CHKL]
        5. Contact Me [CON]
        6. Thanks To [THNK]
        7. Legal Stuff [LGLS]

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|                             BASIC GAME STUFF [BSIC]                        |
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|       CONTROLS        |
|_______________________|

 IN GAME CONTROLS:

     A : Select / Examine / Move
     B : Skip through talking
     - : Open inventory
     + : Open Map

 SNAKE BOXER 5 CONTROLS:
Just to let you know, you have to hold the remote sideways [With the 2 button
closest to your right hand], so controls will be as if they're like that.

     Right : Block / Charge Fire
     Down : Move Down
     Up: Move Up
     At the main menu, press "UP UP DOWN UP PLUS" to enter Cobra mode

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|                       |
|    THE CHARACTERS     |
|_______________________|

This is a very basic character guide, and if you would like to improve it, just
send me an email. Who knows? You might even get your full character description
here.

 Homestar Runner - "Everyone loves me!"
     His skin is white, and has black comma shaped eyes. He wears a red shirt
 with a white star on it, a blue beanie with a spinner, and apparantly pants
 [although they're white]. His legs are way out of proportion to his body, and
 he lacks "visible arms" [I'm preeetty sure he's telekinetic]. He has teeth,
 although you almost never see them. Homestar isn't too bright, and is often
 made fun of by the others.

 Strong Bad - "DELETED!!!"
     Strong Bad is a wrestler of some sort. He had started out as a cliche
 villain that would always fail to the main character, Homestar Runner. But
 as time passed, Strong Bad became more and more popular, and soon his emails
 became _very_ popular. I think his Emails actually make up over 50% of all
 toons on the entire site. But anyway, he always wears a mask and boxing
 gloves, and somehow manages to type and "give the bird" with them on. He wears
 no shirt, and has no 6-pack, even though he often claims that he does. He
 wears tight black pants, and red boots. His emails are extremely popular, and
 he almost always makes fun of the senders, and often deletes them. He created
 "Teen Girl Squad," and prank calls the other characters. He likes to kick the
 cheat and "like-a say-a holy crap!"

 The Cheat - "Meh!"
     The Cheat is uhh...A "small animal" and that's all that's ever been used
 to describle him. He has a golden tooth and can only speak in unintelligable
 noises [Even though sometimes the characters can understand him]. He is
 [somehow] very computer savvy and can animate entire flash cartoons.

 Strong Mad - "DOUGLAAAAS!"
     He has an indefinite height and weight, all you need to know is that he's
 giant and heavy. He's pretty much just a giant cube and according to Strong
 Bad, the facts about him are:
     Fact one: The guy's got a pretty tenuous grasp on the English language.
     Fact two: Garbledina.
     Fact three: He's like a big square, this guy.
     Fact four: Zero volume control.
     Fact five: Directorial inexperience.
     Fact 6: Have you seen his computer?!?

 Strong Sad - "I don't like food anymore!"
     He is the youngest of the Brothers Strong, and has weird, elephant like
 feet. When hit, his body makes the sound of a rubber ball, and is hit often.
 His head is white and has an odd lump on top, and his body is 2 different
 shades of grey. He is very sensitive to caffeine, and even a little sanka will
 make him get extremely hyper.

 Pom-Pom - "Bubble bubbly."
     Pom-Pom is a Pom from the Isle of Pom. He's pretty much a giant yellow
 ball with an orange stipe, arms, legs, and a head. As a baby, his arms and
 legs were nubs, and he had no head [Much like Strong Mad]. His body can absorb
 things, and he is skilled in martial arts.

 Marzipan - "Yeah yeah yeah!"
     Marzipan is the only female [Main] character in the entire series. She is
 Homestar's girlfriend, although they break up frequently. She is the only main
 character not voiced by Matt Chapman. She, like Homestar, has no visible arms,
 making her a talking, telekinetic broom with hair. She can play guitar, and
 has dated characters other than Homestar, such as The Cheat and Bubs.

 Coach Z - "Great Jorb!"
     Coach Z has some problems. He has an odd accent, which gets him into some
 troubles, and he is too nice. He likes to pat butts, and is probably crazy.
 He wears a bright green ...something [Or maybe it's just his skin...I mean,
 look at Pom-Pom], and has a large "Z" emblem around his waist. And in all
 seriousness, I think he just might be a woman...Or something. It's revealed
 near the end of the game that Coach Z might have a thing for Bubs, as he asked
 Bubs for a dance.

 Bubs - "We're always awesome!"
     Bubs also has problems. His head is an odd shape and blue colored. His
 eyes are completely different, and has a permenantly toothy smile. The upper
 half of his body is orange, and the bottom half is grey. The green stripe is
 supposed to be a belt, but, whatever. He runs his own concession stand and
 sells pretty much anything.

 The King of Town

 The Poopsmith

 Homsar
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|                            THE HOUSE OF STRONG [HOS1]                      |
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THE HOUSE OF STRONG CHECKLIST:
[] Chef Hat
[] Banana Peel
[] Black Hat
[] Jela-Ton Mix
[] Metal Detector
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Manual Page 1

You'll start out with Strong Bad checking his E-Mail. When the cutscene is
finished, and icon will pop-up in the top left corner [But we'll ignore it
for now]. Go West out of Strong Bad's room, downstairs, and then West all
the way until you're in the "Game Room." Examine the "Metal Detector" on
the North wall, then go all the way East and leave the house. When outside,
activate your Metal Detector and walk in a straight [South] line out from the 
box. Strong Bad will find something, but I'll explain it later. Next, open your
map and put the "Track" on somewhere, then go there.

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|                                                                            |
|                                THE TRACK [TRK1]                            |
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THE TRACK CHECKLIST:
[] Cell Phone
[] Hedge Clippings
[] Homestar's Clothes
[] Megaphone Teen Girl Squad Card
[] Mustache
[] Trophy

Talk to Homestar and you'll learn that he plans on winning the "Race to the End
of the Race" and celebrating after. Now talk to him about the Party then end 
the conversation. When you finish talking to him, he'll talk to Marzipan and 
end up throwing it across the field. Walk East towards the cell phone and pick
it up. SCORE! Use the phone and prank call everyone EXCEPT MARZIPAN, we'll call
her later. For now, open up the map, add "Marzipan's," then go there.

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|                                                                            |
|                                  MARZIPAN'S [MRZ1]                         |
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MARZIPAN'S CHECKLIST:
[] Balloons
[] Candy Bar Teen Girl Squad Card
[] Hedge Clippings
[] Homestar Float Head
[] Onion

Go South and then West until you see a Shrubbery [DUN DUN DUN DUNNNN!],
examnine the Shrubbery [DUN DUN DUN DUNNNN!] and then continue West. Examine
the "Onion Patch" to gain an Onion. Talk to Marzipan about every subject and
you'll learn why you're not invited to the party and why the Shrubbery [DUN
DUN DUN DUNNNN! ... I'll stop now] is so messy. Open up your map, add "Bubs' 
Stand" onto it, and head on over.

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|                                                                            |
|                         BUBS' CONCES5ION STAND [BCS1]                      |
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BUBS' STAND CHECKLIST:
[] Book Teen Girl Squad Card
[] Car Keys Teen Girl Squad Card
[] ChocoOpps
[] Data Boys Polo Shirt
[] Hedge Clippings
[] Shears [It's a chainsaw!]
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Manual Cover
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Last Manual Page
[] Total Load Powder

Examine the box slightly West of you to get the "Snake Boxer 5 Manual Cover,"
then talk to bubs about the Shears and end the conversation. Now go west until
you see a hedge, use the Shears on it, then pick up the Hedge Clippings.
Continue West and you'll find "The Stick," "Drive-Thru Whale" and finally,
"Photo Booth." Near the Photo Booth is a box, examine it to gain a shirt.
Continue west to find "Cool Car" and lastly "Strong Badia." When you reach
Strong Badia, walk between the flag and the white fence, then use your Metal
Detector and go South. Now that we're done here, go to The Track.

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|                                                                            |
|                            BACK AT THE TRACK [TRK2]                        |
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|____________________________________________________________________________|

THE TRACK CHECKLIST:
[] Cell Phone
[] Hedge Clippings
[] Homestar's Clothes
[] Megaphone Teen Girl Squad Card
[] Mustache
[] Trophy

Go East and talk to Coach Z about both topics. He says you wont be able to
enter the race, and that Homestar and Pom-Pom are the only entrants. Go east
until you find a Hedge, and use your Shears on it. Pick up the Hedge Clippings
and goWest until you enter the Locker Room. Use the Onion on Homestar [Stinky]
and then talk to him about a shower. He'll quickly shed his clothes [Bleargh] 
and go into the shower. Go West until you pass the bench, then North. You'll
notice the camera angle changes, and if it didn't, you're in the wrong place.
Examine the middle locker and inside are Homestar's clothes [Paydirt!]! Now,
go back to the House of Strong.

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|                                                                            |
|                      THE HOUSE OF STRONG REVISITED [HOS2]                  |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

THE HOUSE OF STRONG CHECKLIST:
[] Chef Hat
[] Banana Peel
[] Black Hat
[] Jela-Ton Mix
[] Metal Detector
[] WHAT'S UNDER THE BOX?
[] WHAT IS THE TREASURE?

Examine the Mailbox for a Black Hat, then go inside the house and upstairs.
Examine the Lappy and read the "Got Bulk?" e-mail. Examine the Lappy again,
then read the "Confirmation" e-mail. Now use the phone to call Coach Z,
Marzipan, then Homsar. You have now prank called everyone in the game. Go to
Marzipan's House.

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|                                                                            |
|                         BACK AT MARZIPAN'S [MRZ2]                          |
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MARZIPAN'S CHECKLIST:
[] Balloons
[] Candy Bar Teen Girl Squad Card
[] Hedge Clippings
[] Homestar Float Head
[] Onion

We sure do like backtracking, don't we? Anyway, since you called Marzipan, she
wont be here, so you can do all sorts of shenanigans. First, examine the
Balloons, then go South and West until you see the Hedge. Use the Shears on the
Hedge, then pick up the Hedge Clippings. Go West until you see the Homestar
Float, then use the Shears on them. We're pretty much done here now, so go to
The Track.

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|                                                                            |
|                          EVERYONE LOVES THE TRACK [TRK3]                   |
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|____________________________________________________________________________|

THE TRACK CHECKLIST:
[] Cell Phone
[] Hedge Clippings
[] Homestar's Clothes
[] Megaphone Teen Girl Squad Card
[] Mustache
[] Trophy

We sure are here a lot, aren't we? First off, use your Metal Detector near the
"Race To The End Of The Race" banner, and then use your Homestar Costume. Go
East and talk with Coach Z and you will enter the race! It's pretty simple,
the second you start the race, press the "Quit It" button in the top-left
corner of the screen. You have now successfully ruined Homestar's life
[+>9000 EXP].

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|                                                                            |
|                       THE HOUSE OF STRONG & HOMESTAR [HOS3]                |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

THE HOUSE OF STRONG CHECKLIST:
[] Chef Hat
[] Banana Peel
[] Black Hat
[] Jela-Ton Mix
[] Metal Detector
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Manual Page 1

So you've ruined Homestar's life, but not everything is peachy. It turns out
that he decided [Without your consent] to live in your house. Talk to him
about both subjects, then end the conversation and open your map. Put the
"King Of Town's Castle" somewhere, and go over there.

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|                                                                            |
|                      THE KING OF TOWN'S CASTLE [KOT1]                      |
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|____________________________________________________________________________|

THE KING OF TOWN'S CASTLE CHECKLIST:
[] Hedge Clippings
[] Homestar's Criminal Records
[] Plunger
[] Shovel
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Manual Pages 2-49

This is pretty simple if you know what you're doing, otherwise it's a while of
trial and error. But, the good thing for you is, you have a guide to help you!
First off, head East and use the Shears on the hedge, then grab the Hedge
Clippings. Now, use your Metal Detector and go directly West, you should find
an item. Now, go East and enter the Castle. Quickly grab the Shovel, then
examine the Statue. Wait for the Poopsmith to cross passed you and shovel the
other pile of whatsit, then examine the Cake-Shaped privacy screen. Wait for
the Poopsmith to shovel the first pile of whatsit, then go East grab the
plunger. I suggest you just let the Poopsmith spot you, then Strong Mad will
catch you and toss you out of the window. Use the Shovel on the Treasure
Marker, then re-enter the castle. Use the Plunger on the Drain on the North
wall. Wait for the Poopsmith to spot you, then quickly examine the Plunger and
Vent. Now go East until you reach the end, then examine Homestar's Records.
After Strong Mad throws you out again [You must have broken something by this
point], go back to the House Of Strong.

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|                                                                            |
|                    LET'S GET RID OF HOMESTAR [BKTR]                        |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

Use the Shovel on the Treasure Marker, then go inside the house. Examine the
giant box on the table, then use the Criminal Records on Homestar. Go upstairs
to Strong Bad's Room and examine the Lappy. Check the e-mail and then go to
Bubs' Stand. 

Talk to him about the "Total Load" powder to recieve it, but you won't be able
to use it. Go East to Strong Badia and use the Shovel on the Treasure Marker. 

Now go to The Track and use your Shovel on the Treasure Marker there. Run East
and pick up the coupons on the ground, then use the Jela-Ton powder on the
water slightly South and West of you then use the Balloons on the "Heavy
Lourde." Run east until you reach the Turtle, Curdle, and Hurdle. Examine the
Turtle and use it on the Hurdle, then examine the Curdle and use it on the
Turtle. Now examine the microphone and run West to pick up the "Mustache" that
falls out. Now, just to be sure you have everything correct:
Jela-Ton Water [It's red]
Balloon attatched to the Heavy Lourde
Hurdle, Turtle, Curdle [IN THAT ORDER]

Now, put on your Homestar costume, then examine the Video Camera. The race is
pretty simple, and I can pretty much guarantee you that you will _not_ beat
Pom-Pom's time without cheating [You dirty cheater]. So, run across the log as
fast as you can, then mash "A." If all goes well, you'll grab the Heavy Loude
without any problems, then super jump over the Hurdle. You'll get tired, then
barely make it over the turtle, and finally, you'll just hop over the Curdle.
As long as you beat 22 seconds, you'll be okay. But if you don't, go over to
the camera, and examine it. Now, remove your Homestar costume and go into the
Locker Room. Go to the lockers, then open the left one [Pom-Pom's]. Use the
Total Load powder on his bag, then go examine the "OFFICE" door. Talk to Coach
Z about the Total Load powder, and you [i.e. Homestar] will get the trophy.

Go over to Bubs' Stand and talk to him about the candy, and you'll recieve the
most disgusting candy ever [Chocolate Covered Packing Peanuts]. Then go West
until you see the Cool Car, then use your shovel on it.

Go to Marzipan's house and use the shovel on the "Loose Dirt" at the North,
then use Total Load on the hole. Next, use the Hedge Clippings on the Hole,
then use the Candy on the front door. Watch the King Of Town fall to his doom,
then go to Bubs' Stand, get more candy, and use it on the hole that the King
fell into. Now go to th House of STrong and use Homestar's Cell Phone on
Homestar in the Kitchen, then go West into the Game Room. Use the Trophy on the
Homestar in there, and Homestar is finally gone!

One last problem though, Marzipan decided to throw the victory party in your
house. Go to the "See Dee Spinner" between Bubs and Coach Z and examine it
until everyone gets in a conga line. Go East to where the King of Town was,
then pick up the Banana Peel. Go West until you see the "Luxa Lounger" and
examine it so it's in the "Fully Extended" position. Now, wait for the Conga
Line to approach the window, then use Banana Peel on it [Homestar].

____ ____ _  _ ____ ____ ____ ___ _  _ _    ____ ___ _ ____ _  _   /
|    |  | |\ | | __ |__/ |__|  |  |  | |    |__|  |  | |  | |\ |  / 
|___ |__| | \| |__] |  \ |  |  |  |__| |___ |  |  |  | |__| | \| .  
                                                                    
You beat the game!


 ____________________________________________________________________________
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|                                                                            |
|                           OTHER ACHIEVEMENTS [ACHV]                        |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

 _______________________
|                       |
| TEEN GIRL SQUAD CARDS |
|_______________________|

 - Book -
Buried in Strong Badia

 - Candy Bar -
Dig the North-Most soil at Marzipan's and pour Total Load in it

 - Car Keys -
Use Shovel on the Cool Car

 - Cockroach -
Get a perfect score on Teen Girl Squad

 - Megaphone -
Buried at the Track


    - PROPERLY WINNING THE GAME -

1. What's Her Face gets the Car Keys.
2. Cheerleader gets the Basketball.
3. So and So gets the book.
4. The Ugly One gets the Suntan Lotion
5. The Ugly One Gets the Candy Bar.
6. Cheerleader gets the Megaphone.

 _______________________
|                       |
|       CLOTHES         |
|_______________________|

 - Black Cap -
Check Strongbad's Mailbox

 - Chef's Hat -
After you get Homestar out of the Kitchen, it will be on the WavyMic

 - Data Boy's Polo Shirt -
Under the Box near the Photobooth

 - Mustache -
Use the Microphone at the Track

 _______________________
|                       |
|   SNAKE BOXER PAGES   |
|_______________________|

 - Cover -
Under the box near Bubs' Conces5ion Stand

 - Page 1 -
Buried outside of the House of Strong.

 - Pages 2-49 -
Buried outside of the King Of Town's castle.

 - Final Page -
In extended play, talk to Bubs

 _______________________
|                       |
|   OBSCURE TROPHIES    |
|_______________________|

 - Exploration -
1. Examine the Videlectrix poster in the game room twice.
2. Examine the Microphone at The Track twice.
3. Examine the whatsit in the King Of Town's castle.
4. Examine the rave [lower] switch in Strong Bad's room twice.
5. Examine the fridge in the House of Strong.
6. Examine the rightmost locker in the Track, then examine the lunchbox.
7. Examine the hole after the King of Town has fallen in.
8. Examine the stick twice.

 - Hedge Clipper -
Use the shears on every hedge, the locations are:
The Track, Marzipan's, The Stick, and the King Of Town's.

 - Nuisance -
1. Examine The Cheat, and then examine the dryer.
2. Insult Bubs.
3. While Marzipan is in her backyard, examine her front door 4 times.
4. In extended play, talk to Homestar twice.
5. In extended play, talk to Coach Z twice.

 - Strong Sad -
1. Insult Bubs twice.
2. After digging up the treasure at the House of Strong, examine the hole.
3. After the King of Town falls into the hole at Marzipan's, use ChocoOpps on
the hole.

 ____________________________________________________________________________
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|                                                                            |
|                          ENTIRE GAME CHECKLIST [CHKL]                      |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

[] Balloons
[] Banana Peel
[] Black Hat
[] Cell Phone
[] Chef Hat
[] ChocoOpps
[] Data Boys Polo Shirt
[] Hedge Clippings x4
[] Jela-Ton Mix
[] Metal Detector
[] Mustache
[] Onion
[] Plunger
[] Shears [It's a chainsaw!]
[] Shovel
[] Total Load Powder
[] Trophy
[] Homestar's Criminal Records
[] "Homestar Costume" - Head
[] "Homestar Costume" - Clothes
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Manual Cover
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Manual Page 1
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Manual Pages 2-49
[] "Snake Boxer 5" Last Manual Page
[] "Teen Girl Squad Card" - Book
[] "Teen Girl Squad Card" - Candy Bar
[] "Teen Girl Squad Card" - Car Keys
[] "Teen Girl Squad Card" - Megaphone

 ____________________________________________________________________________
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|                                                                            |
|                               CONTACT ME [CON]                             |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

I'd just like to let you know that this is my first guide, so there will be
some problems, I know. Please contact me to notify me of any issues, or to
help me with content. If you help me with anything, I will mention you.

But please, try to make it to where I can actually read the e-mail. If it is
all in "txt-tlk," I will instantly delete it. Well, either delete it, or use
it as an example. When submitting help, please let me know what you would like
to be mentioned as.

EMAIL: iseestupid @ hotmail DOT com
MSN: iseestupid @ hotmail DOT com

 ____________________________________________________________________________
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|                                                                            |
|                               THANKS TO [THNK]                             |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

Thanks to:

Number1YoshiFan [GameFAQs]
   For details on the Nuisance trophy

southprkfan [GameFAQs]
   For a lot of help on the "Other Achievements" section

The Brothers Chaps
   For being so Awesome

HRWiki
   For help on character details

Nintendo
   For hosting such a great game

TellTale Games
   For making such a great game

 ____________________________________________________________________________
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|                                                                            |
|                             LEGAL STUFF [LGLS]                             |
|____________________________________________________________________________|
|____________________________________________________________________________|

The author and owner of this guide is Cody Harrell

Copyright 2008 Cody Harrell

This may be not be reproduced under any circumstances except for personal, 
private use. It may not be placed on any web site or otherwise distributed 
publicly without advance written permission. Use of this guide on any other 
web site or as a part of any public display is strictly prohibited, and a 
violation of copyright.

The only websites with permission to use this guide, as stated by the author
and owner, are:

www.supercheats.com
www.gamefaqs.com
www.1up.com
www.gamershell.com