Review by blueb11
"The End is Nigh! ...What does 'nigh' mean again?"
Destroy All Humans! is an awesome game well-deserving of all the attention it received before it was released. This game is a beautiful, captivating, and humorous game. I heart Crypto.
Hilarious Plot Makes Review Author Laugh! 10/10
The Furons are an alien race that lack the vital organs needed to uh... make more of themselves. They keep themselves alive through cloning. However, few Furons know that the cloning process is making more degenerate clones each and every time. Therefore, it is crucial that they get new, pure, unadulterated Furon DNA... and there IS a species other than the Furons that contains this DNA. The species? Homo sapiens. For us, it bites. But for Cryptosporidium-137, it means he gets to disintegrate some 1950s human booty.
Weapons To Use Against Humans Are Useful! 7/10
Although there's nothing too fancy, you do get a Zap-O-Matic to electrocute those pesky, uncouth humans, and an anal probe to make them run around with their hands planted on their behinds. Later on in the game you get more toys, such as an Disintegrator Ray and an Ion Detonator. Orthopox, your guide through your adventure, will sell you upgrades for these weapons and for your saucer, which is equipped with weapons of its own, including Sonic Boom and your very own Death Ray. However, I wish there were more weapons you could use... it would make your job all the more interesting...
Even without weapons, you can use your psychokinesis to pick humans (and maybe some cows) up into the air. You can also use the Holobob, which lets you take the form of a human. Another thing you can do is hypnotize the humans. Make those filthy humans into distractions while you do your dirty work!
Music Goes Well With Game! 7/10
The music, while nothing really special, accents the "cheesy alien movie" affect. It's pretty cool...
Dialogue Leaves Me In Stitches! 10/10
The dialogue, from the very first lines to the very end, are hilarious. Cryptosporidium faces some very uneducated 1950s people, and everyone seems to want to label him "green," while he's gray.
Read People's Minds! It's Fun! 10/10
While technically this isn't really an area such as audio or plot, this game features a novelty that is rather amusing: mind-reading. You can read the minds of everyday humans. You can listen to them think about how they: cheated on their husbands; how much they need a new dress, a new boyfriend, or a new Valium pill; how much they hate their superiors or their jobs; and what they think of their lives. Everything they think is supposed to be funny, and 8 times out of 10 it is.
The Rolling Lands Are Meant to Be Explored! 8/10
The worlds are... expansive. When I first played, my sister and I marveled at how much of the farm I could actually explore. Of course, Orthopox won't let you totally abandon the Invasion Site, but you do have quite a bit of room...
The Sun is Shining! Really! 7/10
This game offers some beautiful sunrise scenes, rolling hills, beautiful mountains, and just overall beautiful scenery. Sometimes movement seems kind of stocky, though, and a few times it appears that Crypto can fall through his environment. Overall, however, it's really a good show.
Overall I Heart Pox! 8/10
This game is one of my favorite XBox games. Then again, I don't have a lot of XBox games. But the unforgettable humor of this game is insanely appealing... as is the promising carnage! So get out there and DESTROY ALL HUMANS!
Reviewer's Rating: 4.0 - Great
Originally Posted: 01/09/06
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