__ | | ______ ______ ______ ______ ___| | / | V V V | | ,, | ,, |__,, | ,, | ,, | | || | '' |/""' | || | || | | || | ,, < ,, | || | || | | '' | || | '' | || | '' | \____ |__|| |______|__||__|______| | |__ | | __ |______| |\__ |___ ______ _______| |___ | | V V | | | ___| ,, | ,, | ====| ___| | | __| || | '' | ___|| | __ | || | || | ____/ | | || | | '' | || | ""''| | | '' | \______|__||__|______|__| \______/ ______ __ ___| |___ ______ ______ _____ _____ / | || | | || || || | |__,, | || | ___| ,, ||_ _||_ || _| /""' | || || | __| || | | | | | | | | ,, | || || || | || | | | | | | | | '' | '' || '' | '' | | | | ',,' | \______|______|\______|______| _| |_ | '' | | | | | /) |______| |____| _/_(/ _ , _ (__/ )/(/_ ,___ \__/_) / , \ / _/_ \/ ) / / / / / _ / /"\/ /"\_("_( _ ,_ _,/ __/ / /"\| |\,/| |/| /_) /"\( \_/\__/\_/,_) \ (_(_| )_(_( (_/\___/ \_/|/| | |/| |_\__/\_/ \ __ ______ ______ __________ ______ ______ _____ ______ __ _______| |___ / | V V \ / |/ | \ | \ | | ,, |__,, | ,, ,, | ,, | | ,, | ,__| ,, |--| ,, | ___| | || |/""' | || || | '' | | """"\ | | '' |--| '' || | __ | || | ,, | || || | ____/ \,,,, | | __| ,, < | ,,,,/| || | | '' | '' | || || | ""''| | '' | " | || | | | | '' | \____ |______|__||__||__|______/ |______/\_____|__||__|__|__| \______/ | | |______/ Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned Game Script Writer: InfernoSD AKA InfernoDragon Version: 1.00 as of 5/17/10 Copyright: 2010 InfernoSD =============================================================================== TABLE OF CONTENTS (#toc) =============================================================================== I. Table of Contents (#toc) II. Introduction (#intro) III. Character Key (#charkey) IV. Storyline Missions (#story) 1. Clean and Serene (#bg1) 2. Angels in America (#bg2) 3. It's War (#bg3) 4. Action/Reaction (#bg4) 5. Liberty City Choppers (#jf1) 6. Bad Cop Drop (#jf2) 7. Buyer's Market (#bg5) 8. Politics (#ts1) 9. Off Route (#ts2) 10. Coming Down (#ab1) 11. This Shit's Cursed (#bg6) 12. Hit the Pipe (#jf3) 13. End of Chapter (#jf4) 14. Bad Standing (#jf5) 15. Heavy Toll (#et1) 16. Marta Full of Grace (#et2) 17. Shifting Weight (#et3) 18. Diamonds in the Rough (#rbo1) 19. Roman's Holiday (#ab2) 20. Collector's Item (#rbo2) 21. Was It Worth It? (#rbo3) 22. Get Lost (#ts3) V. Random Character Encounters (#rndchar) 1. Malc 1 (#malc1) 2. Malc 2 (#malc2) 3. Dave (#dg1) 4. Brian (#bj1) VI. Contact Info (#contact) VII. Credits (#credits) VIII. Version History (#version) IX. Legal (#legal) =============================================================================== INTRODUCTION (#intro) =============================================================================== This document is a listing of all the major dialogue in GTA IV: The Lost and Damned. All the cutscenes, driving dialogues, phonecalls, emails, and other conversations are recorded here. I've chosen to leave out a number of elements including fighting insults, mission failure convos, and various others; the game is packed full of them, and they'd do little more than muddy up the real content. Chevrons <> are used to indicate the heading of each item, such as a cutscene or email, as well as to explain what occurs in the completion of certain mission objectives. Brackets  are used (mostly in cutscenes) to explain characters' actions. Some dialogues come in multiple variations that I specify as A, B, sometimes C and D. There's also a few cases where the player can activate optional phonecalls. Most browsers have a Find function. Press Ctrl + F and enter a search term from the table of contents, such as "#intro", to go directly to that section of the guide. =============================================================================== CHARACTER KEY (#charkey) =============================================================================== Johnny Johnny Klebitz. Billy Billy Grey, President of The Lost MC Alderney Chapter. Jim James Fitzgerald, The Lost Treasurer, close to Johnny. Brian Brian Jeremy, The Lost Loyal Secretary, suckup to Billy. Terry Terrence Thorpe, The Lost Arms Dealer. Jason Jason Michaels, The Lost Enforcer. Clay Clayton Simons, The Lost Road Captain. Angus Angus Martin, member of The Lost now paralyzed and in a wheelchair. Ashley Ashley Butler, Johnny's ex-girlfriend. Chad Billy's councilor at the rehab center. Roncero Another employee at rehab. PB Pretty Boy, bike mechanic working in Bohan. Dave David Grossman, lawyer and biker friend of Billy's. Stubbs Thomas Stubbs III, crooked congressman, friend of Dave's. Ray Ray Boccino, a Pegorino family capo, friends with Ashley. Ed Ed McCornish, corrupt police officer. Jimmy Jimmy Matthews, Ed's partner. Leavis Doorman at The Jousters, where Stubbs spends his time. Lizzy Elizabeta Torres, a head of drug distribution around the city. PB X Trey Stewart, AKA Playboy X, head of North Holland drug distribution. Niko Niko Bellic, immigrant wanted by the Russian mob. Malc Malcolm, member of the Uptown Riders. DeSean Malc's friend and another member of the Uptown Riders. Andreas Elizabeta's bodyguard. Marta Elizabeta's friend and drug mule. Roman Roman Bellic, Niko's cousin. Cook The cook aboard The Platypus ship. Tony Anthony Prince, AKA Gay Tony, owner of two nightclubs. Evan Evan Moss, Tony's boyfriend. Luis Luis Fernando Lopez, employee/partner of Tony, bouncer at his clubs. Isaac Isaac Roth, Jewish mobster and diamond dealer. Mori Mori Green, Isaac's partner. =============================================================================== STORYLINE MISSIONS (#story) =============================================================================== ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- CLEAN AND SERENE (#bg1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - at The Lost MC> [The bikers leave the club.] Terry Hold on, little buddy. [driving Angus's wheelchair down the stairs] Johnny Come on guys, come on let's go. Terry Alright man. Keep it up, I'm gonna push you down these stairs. Watch out. Watch out! I got a man in a chair. Johnny Alright, everybody, c'mon. Break it up. Let's go. Terry See ya, fuck. [They get on their bikes and drive north across Alderney.] <cutscene - outside the Westdyke Memorial Hospital> Roncero You do understand what probation means? Billy Uh... yes sir. Roncero It means that if you continue down that same path, you'll be locked up and calling some cellmate Daddy within a month. Billy Yes, sir. Roncero If I had it my way we wouldn't waste our time - you'd be inside already. Chad Mr. Grey has made great progress. His share on willfulness was one of the most powerful things I've ever heard. I believe in this man. Roncero Well, let's hope you don't live to regret that faith. Chad God works in mysterious ways. Roncero In this case, it seems God is down right perverse, but I'll leave the salvation to you gentlemen. [walking off] You, stay out of trouble. Billy Yes, Daddy. Roncero Excuse me? Billy Yes sir. [Roncero walks away.] Chad Remember. It's a disease. Billy I know, Chad. I know. It's a disease. Meetings every day. Call you if I feel the need to use. Pray. I pray. In fact I'm praying right now. Chad You're very willful. Billy Was very willful, Chad, was very willful. I've changed. And you know what, Chad? You changed me. [walking off] Gentlemen, shall we get the fuck out of here? Chad Hey, stay in touch! [Billy walks over to the bikers, where Johnny hands over a biker jacket.] Johnny Yo. Here you go. Billy It's about time. [puts it on] Home sweet home. <begin drive> Billy Come on, brothers. Get me back to church. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - A> Johnny Only Billy Grey would get taken down on a distribution beef and end up in a country club. How were things in there? Billy You know, John boy, it was kinda hard. Harder than you'd think. I don't know what I'd rather go back to, stints in the hole or group share cluster fucks in that place. Johnny Okay. Billy Whether it's train gangs in the showers or grown men crying and hugging in rehab, there's definitely an undeniable twinge of homosecuality in this fine country's correctional system. Johnny No wonder you keep getting caught then, Billy. You can't stay away from it. Billy Now, let's be clear, I keep getting caught because assholes like you ain't watching out for me. Johnny Don't question me. Sometimes you gotta look out for yourself, Billy. Billy Okay. I'll save my questions until I see the chapter. And you better have looked after my baby. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - B> Billy Had any contact with my dear old friends, the Angels of Death? Johnny There's a truce, Billy. You know that. A truce means no hassle, everybody gets to do business and make money without looking over their shoulders too much. Billy All the money in the world isn't worth anything if you don't have your pride, brother. Johnny It's hard to be proud when you don't have a roof over your head. I can show you the books. Billy Fucking books, man. Fucking books. Show me some whiskey. Show me some hole. I've been putting up with rehab skanks getting sex therapy for the last few months. I need something real. Johnny Oh yeah? Billy Who's been hanging round the house? The usual mattress cover? Johnny Some old faces, some new ones. Billy I ain't interested in their faces. You're the one who gets emotionally attached, J, not me. Well, not to women at least. Johnny Just bikes and drugs then? Billy Bikes and brothers, Johnny. Bikes and brothers. I ain't attached to no drugs, man. They're attached to me, clingy bastards. <reach The Lost MC> Johnny I bet you're happy to see this place, man. <cutscene> [They cheer as they enter the club.] Billy It is good to be back my brothers! Clay Hoo-ha! Line 'em up, motherfuckers! Johnny Line 'em up, my brother... yes, sir! Billy Johnny, what's going on? Johnny Not much, Bill. Usual stuff. Brian We missed you, Bill. Billy So, aching for a fucking drink here. Brian Just pour, Willy Wetbacks. Billy Salut, motherfucker. Brian To wet pussy and dry tequila. [They drink.] Billy Yummy. So, Johnny boy. Where's my bike? Johnny You know where it is. Billy Let me rephrase the question - where the fuck is my bike, and why the fuck haven't you gotten it back for me? Johnny Because you know where it is. Billy Are you deaf? Give me that whisky. Are you fucking deaf? Johnny No. Billy Then answer the God damn question. Why the fuck haven't you gotten it back for me, friend-brother? Johnny One word: business. Like I told you when you were in there, or were you so busy playing holier-than-thou you started believing your own bullshit? Billy Oh forgive me. You know, I've had a complicated few weeks. Brian I can only imagine, Bill. Billy You know, coming off heroine's kinda hard. I think I acquired a touch of amnesia. What business is more important, mister 1980s yuppie big shot, than your best friend's bike, when he's close to getting a fifteen year stretch? Johnny The business that pays his lawyers fees. The business that puts food on all of our tables. The business that we are all in, while you're out pretending to be saved. Billy Get my bike! Johnny What am I? Your fucking dog? Brian I told you we should have gotten his bike. Johnny You told me? You told me? You don't tell me shit, you little fuck. Listen, Billy, they were pissed and they had a reason. Your bike chopped that girl's leg off. You put Joe Jon's nephew in a coma. The Deadbeats kept the bike. We needed the money. Billy You needed some balls. Some fuckin' heart. Something. I can't believe I'm hearing this shit. Brian Yeah. Johnny And I can't believe I'm hearing this - after everything we did for you. Paid your rehab, paid your lawyers fees, paid your rent, paid everything, shit, we set stuff up for you. We do well, man, but it's time to be smart. Billy You're right, you're right, no you're right... You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna run right out and buy a condo. Get a mortgage, 401(k). Then fold that over into an IRA and a CD. [laughing with Brian] What the fuck, man? Be smart? You be smart you fucking chump, you're ridiculous. Have you got a healthcare plan? Jim Come on Johnny. Let's just get his bike. Come on. Johnny Well on your head be it. Billy It always is. It's called leadership. Shit meaning something. Johnny Yeah and your shit means a lot, man. C'mon. [walking away] Billy Johnny. Johnny Yeah? Billy Wait, c'mere. Listen, man. I'm a little pent up right now. You saw that shit I had to go through, right? It was really frustrating. Fucked up shit. Craziness, right? Okay, so I'm a little pissed off and I've been a bit of a prick lately, but come on man. You and Angus built that bike for me. That's gotta stand for something. Johnny Yeah you're right, brother. I'm gonna go get it. And you know what? Peace and prosperity be damned. Billy Peace and prosperity be damned, my brother. You are my brother, Johnny. Always. Johnny [walking off] Let's go! <begin drive> Billy Brothers, I couldn't let you run this errand without me. You might fuck it up. Brothers aren't meant to be this close, Johnny. But we're gonna have to be until I get my bike back. Jim Let's hope Pretty Boy still knows where this thing is. Guantanamo Avenue, boys. <driving - going to Guantanamo Avenue - A> Billy Look at me, manage to avoid prison and I'm still ass to cock with a dude. Johnny Yeah, well, I ain't too happy about it neither man - you wanna turn around and go back to the clubhouse? Billy I'm happy about it alright, John boy. Fuck, after that therapy shit, a drink and the road is all I need. Johnny Good to know. Billy You been missing me all that time I spent sharing and caring in rehab? Johnny Let's get your bike and save the emotions for later. Billy You know what, Johnny? You could do with some of the trust exercises they got in there. I'm going to blindfold you when we get back. All you gotta do is fall over and trust that your brothers are going to catch ya. Can you do that? Johnny You boys'll be too drunk to catch VD, let alone two hundred and thirty pounds of rapidly approaching middle age. Billy Technically, you're two hundred and thirty pounds of Jewish biker, John boy. Your faith has gotta come first. Johnny Religion, Billy. Religion. I gave up with faith. Billy Johnny the Jew, Klebitz the Heeb. Good to be here, man. Good to fucking be here. What's your problem? Johnny Nothing, man. Billy I'm the leader of the chapter again, Johnny. And you're just another brother. Can you handle it? Johnny Long as you run the chapter right we can all handle it. Billy I'll run it the way it needs to be run. Same as the three guys before me did. Same as I'm doing now. Johnny Really? It feels kinda different. Before all we cared about was having fun, the brothers, getting shit-faced, it's screw you, you get in our way, you're gonna get your teeth kicked in. Billy Thank you for sharing! And now what's it feel like to you, Jonathan? Johnny It feels like knocking heads is a full time job and maybe if we stopped doing it for a minute, we'd look around and realize that the fun ended a long time ago. Billy Yeah? Well, I signed up to be a brother for life, you ungrateful fuck. If you're in The Lost for the good times only, fair weather weekends in the Carraways, then you ain't in The Lost. You get me? Johnny Chill out, man. I just hope when we decide to take a break, to slow down, that it's still an option on the table. <driving - going to Guantanamo Avenue - B> Billy How's Angus? Johnny Good, you know. You should go and see him. Billy Yeah, sure. I got a lot on my plate. I only just got out and look at the state of shit around here. Johnny He'd appreciate if you made some time for him. He may be stuck in a chair, but he's still a member of The Lost. Billy That guy, he's an exceptional human being, an example to us all. After the accident, shit. Johnny Yeah. Billy I mean, he can't ride, he can't get any hole. Johnny I know what he can't do, Billy. He does too. Just go and fucking see him, alright? Billy You're tense, Johnny. must have been stressful heading up the chapter while I was away. Johnny It was fine. Billy Not everybody's shoulders are wide enough to bear the responsibility. Are any of the brothers giving you shit? I'll have a talk to them, don't worry. Johnny Things ran smoothly, Bill. You know, they ran real smooth when we were concentrating on shifting drugs and not just putting them in our arms and up our noses. Billy With a nose the size of yours there wouldn't be much blow for the other brothers anyway, John boy. Johnny All I'm saying is we were cool. We took a break from saying "fuck you" to everything and we made some deals that worked out. Billy Yeah, good for you Johnny. If you had so much fun why don't you go start your own chapter? Johnny That's not what I meant, man. Billy Because this one, my chapter, isn't big enough to have two people pulling it in different directions. Johnny I know, man. I'm loyal, but I ain't a drone, man. We should be able to talk about shit. Billy You know, I've been here since I got out of juvie. I've seen men die for their brothers and men rat their brothers out. And I know that this gang don't mean shit if men don't follow their leader. <reach Guantanamo Avenue> Jim This is the joint. <cutscene> Jim Pretty Boy. PB Hey. Jim Where's the bike? PB Oh, it's good to see you too, tough guys. Uhh... what bike are you talking about exactly? Johnny You know what we're talking about. Jim Billy's bike. PB Billy's bike? Jesus, man, it's been a long time. I thought he was dead. What's he want it for? To sell it for crack, right, eh? Jim Shut up. PB Listen, you know how it is. Thing's passed hands, parts been changed up. Hard to say if that chopper's even around anymore. Sorry, boys... Billy [walks in] You will be, my friend. You will be. PB Hey, good to see you, Bill! Man, I thought you was dead... Billy Jim, start up the bike. [Jim starts the bike, Johnny holds Pretty Boy's face down to the tire.] PB Whoa, hold on... Wait please, please... no, nooo... Billy Where - is - my bike? Johnny Speak, you ugly fuck! PB Ah, okay listen... ah, the Angels of Death took it to their place in Northwood. Billy Motherfucking Angels of Death. PB That's all I know... please! Johnny Thank you. Billy Yes, thank you. [Billy smashes Pretty Boy in the face as they leave.] <begin drive> Jim Okay, now all we gotta do is pick up the bike. <driving - going to the AOD hangout - A> Johnny You didn't have to do that. He told you who had the bike. Billy You really have gone soft, haven't you Johnny? You know, you could do with a stretch in the joint, might harden you up. Johnny Whatever. Billy What about an eye for an eye and all that shit? You shoulda been the one to make that guy pay for holding out. Johnny Enough with that shit. We got more things to worry about than respect and stupid kids' stuff. We got to keep business afloat or we're fucked. Billy You just don't get it, do you? This is what it's about. This. Not that money shit. We're in it to stick it to all those yuppies and hippies and motherfucking Deadbeats. Give me a stiff drink, some hard drugs, the road and my chopper. That's all I need. Maybe an occasional bit of the hole. Wouldn't be a man if I didn't need that now, would I? How's Ashley, by the way? She single? Johnny What about your brothers, man? Ain't you in it for The Lost? Billy Everything I do is about The Lost. I don't exist without my brothers - without you. If you don't get that, then you don't get nothing, John boy. Sad state of affairs. Johnny Yeah, well, it's some tough love you're showing them. <driving - going to the AOD hangout - B> Johnny Poor fuck. I don't think he's got any nose left. Billy Well yours is plenty big, my compassionate friend. You should donate some. To the cause. Johnny Shit, you know best, Bill, you're the leader. You make these decisions, I'll just taxi you around on your little welcome back tour. There any more side trips you want to make on your way to the Deadbeats? Billy No, I just want my bike back, that's what this is all about. Johnny Good. Billy But Johnny, you need to quit your bitching and moaning. Johnny I'm not gonna quit telling you when you're being an asshole. Being a leader doesn't make you right. Billy You haven't always got the information, brother. So shut up and behave. Your ego is getting you into trouble, my friend. Johnny It used to be all you need to worry about was waking up with some bruises. Maybe a broken rib and a hangover. Billy Don't forget about the ugly broads you'd take home. Johnny Now, Pretty Boy's waking up without a face. That's not gonna go back to normal. Angus lost his legs for life. Billy You're out of line, Johnny. You're out of line. <reach AOD hangout> Jim We're here. Johnny Let's get your bike then. <The Lost have a brief shootout against some AOD bikers.> Billy There she is, my baby. I think we earned us a drink, follow me. Johnny We're all behind you, Billy. Lead on. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - Clay dialogue> Clay Looks like Billy's back getting this old gang into deep shit. Johnny That's a President's job, ain't it, Clay? Same with a motorcycle club or a whole country. Clay Who knows, man? I leave the politicking to you boys. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - Jim dialogue> Jim Billy got his bike back. He'll be cool now. Johnny Yeah, Jim? Something tells me fucking up Pretty Boy and killing them Deadbeats ain't enough for him. Jim Maybe. Let's just say I'm not gonna share today's events with Jackie and the kid. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - Jason dialogue> Johnny Jason, I haven't seen you around much, man. Jason Yeah, I been fucking this Russian bitch in Broker. Gets her psycho daddy real mad. Johnny He gives you trouble, he'll have to start worrying about the whole chapter. Tell him that. Then we'll see how psycho he is. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - Terry dialogue> Terry What's Ashley gonna do now that Billy's back? Johnny Fuck me Terry. That's her call. It's a free country. Terry I don't know where you've been living, pal. Us brothers are the only free people I see. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - Billy dialogue - A> Johnny Hey, Billy! How's it feel to be on the old bike, man? Billy Like when your wife is screwing the neighbor. I'm gonna be up all night tuning her back to normal. Johnny You're gonna be up all night fucking and getting high. The bike'll wait til morning. <driving - returning to The Lost MC - Billy dialogue - B> Billy You like being back in line? Wouldn't want you getting too used to thinking for yourself. Johnny Yeah, Bill? At least I twisted the wick when I had the brothers behind me, old man. Billy I'll twist your wick, Johnny. Twist the little thing right off your body. <cutscene> Johnny Okay, Bill. You got your bike. Take what you gotta take, drink what you gotta drink, fuck what you gotta fuck. I don't care, kill who you gotta kill. But get it out of your system. Billy Mmm. Johnny And when you do, give me a call and we'll get back to business. Billy You're not my PO, brother. Remember who the head of this chapter is. Johnny I do, man... trust me. Billy Tell me, do you still have Ashley's phone number? Why don't you give her a call for me? Tell her I'm inside, getting all sorts of fucked up. And that I would really like some, I mean we, meaning all of us, would love some hole. <phonecall to Angus - optional> Angus Johnny, my brother. Johnny Hey, Angus. You seen much of Billy yet? Angus I seen him, yeah. Not much though. Johnny Well, dude, what do you think? Is he on top of his shit or is he gonna run this club into a hole? Angus He's gonna run himself into a hole, I know that. Shit, Billy doesn't really talk to me. I mean he'd hardly make eye contact since I got hurt. Johnny That's because you're way down in your chair, Angus, and it's hard to see ya. Angus Ha ha ha. That'd be a damn sight funnier if I didn't think it was true, John. Billy doesn't see anything that he don't wanna. He'll see anything within smoking, fucking, and drinking proximity, but he won't see the two ton truck bearing down on him. Johnny I get you, man. Later on. <phonecall to Ashley - optional> Ashley Johnny. Thought you'd never call. Johnny Yeah, we haven't seen one another in a long time. Ashley I just see you in my dreams, sugar. Johnny Come on, Ash, give it up. You seriously got time to dream inbetween your three-day ice binges? Ashley What's up, Johnny? How you like having Billy back? Johnny I like it fine. Look, I got to go. Take care of yourself. <email> firstname.lastname@example.org <unsure> Some day Hey boy, Man, I fucked things up. I know I did. But you weren't a saint. You weren't. You're who you are, and you do bad shit, and hanging out with you made me do bad shit, even though it ain't your fault. But I did bad shit to you, because you were my world. I thought you would kill me and you didn't, so that makes you a better person than some. I'm so glad we're friends now, it makes me happy to know you're on my side and even though we ain't together and we both fucked this thing up, we are at least friends. I'm off the drugs, Johnny boy. I'm off them. I don't want to get high no more. Not ever. I'm sorting myself out. I'm going to go to college or something. Give back. I miss you. It won't never be the same without you, but it's the way it's got to be. I know that, we both did bad shit and we hurt each other and people who love each other ain't meant to hurt each other. Your friend, Ash <email - positive reply> Ash. Ain't much point going over shit again. Whole world we live in is fucked up and we belong in that world. Things weren't meant to be, and I don't seem to be the family man type. I'm your friend, nothing more. Not ever. I can't watch you do any more drugs. Good luck staying clean this time. Johnny. <email - negative reply> I ain't in the mood for internet chit chat. Have a nice life. Johnny. <email> angus@LostMC.com B.G. out Brother, So, they let him out? Ridiculous in osme ways. Man, it's tough. I love my brothers, all of them, but there's brothers who stood by me, (you, Jimy, Clay and a few others) and brothers who said they would, and I think we know which camp Billy and Brian fall into. This is my life now. I can't ride into the sunset. I can't ride into anything. I'm stuck in a chair and I need money. I need it so we have to keep making it. It's tough. I hope Billy don't fuck it up for all of us. He nearly did last time. We are a small crew. We can't beat the Deadbeats, but we can live alongside them. Billy will come out and go on a rampage. And Brian and those other clowns will drag us along. It ain't going to be good. It's just a question of how bad. Ride safe, Angus <email - positive reply> I hear you, brother. Whatever happens, you know me and you are brothers. Johnny. <email - negative reply> Let's give him a chance, man. Brothers for life. No matter what. Johnny. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ANGELS IN AMERICA (#bg2) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - at The Lost MC> Billy Little dorky gas station attendant boy goes "Hey man! Are you alright" And I go "Yeah dude! How's my bike?" [Everyone laughs. Johnny walks in.] Billy Hey! Johnny K. Girl Hey Johnny, how you doin' baby? [Johnny shoves her away.] Girl Hey, what the fuck? Billy Ooh, stop, domestic violence. Johnny Hey man, you having fun over there? Billy Absolutely. And if I get tested, I have a bag of twelve year old's piss right here. I am clean. Johnny Real nice. Billy Oh fuck you, Johnny. You don't judge me! Johnny Whoaa! Calm down, man. Have another drink or somethin' but calm the fuck down. Billy Oh fuck you, faggot. Johnny Yeah? Really? Jason [runs in] Guys, guys. Billy, Johnny. We got a couple of fuckin' Deadbeats outside. Johnny Deadbeats? What the hell are they doing here? Billy What the fuck do they want? I'm out of rehab three minutes, and they think they can crash my party? Come on. Johnny Let's do what we got to do. [They head outside.] Billy Gentlemen! Gentlemen! Why the long faces? Might I tempt you in a swift libation, my most trusted and honored guests? AOD I thought we had a truce going on. Billy Did you? Funny thing - I wasn't aware. But, let me tell you, it's a strange kind of truce that makes you think it's okay to gatecrash my party, Deadbeat motherfucker. AOD I'm sorry. You enjoy your little party. I take it, the good times are over. No problem, old man. [flips him off] Billy Screw you, you Deadbeat prick. [shoots him] Think you can come to my party and gatecrash? Come on! Jason Yeah, come on! Johnny Aah, you moron! <The Lost chase down the Angels of Death trying to escape.> <phonecall from Billy> Billy Johnny, man, you let those Deadbeats tell their buddies a war's on? Johnny No, I stopped 'em. We don't need more brothers dyin' over this. Billy Sensible Johnny K. Come meet us over on Grummer Road, brother. <cutscene - in the parking lot off Grummer Road> Billy Whoo. Disaster averted, brother. Jason Yeah! Johnny You coming back? Jason I'd love to man, but I'm seeing this hot Russian broad over on Firefly Island. Gonna drink her daddy's expensive vodka and fuck her under the pier. Johnny Ooh - young love in the modern world. Jason Yeah! Johnny That's beautiful. Billy These Deadbeats won't be screwing around with us anymore. Let the good times roll. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- IT'S WAR (#bg3) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - at The Lost MC> Dave They was mad but, see, there was only two of them. Billy Were mad, Dave. Were. Not was. You should know that. No, you'd a been okay, because you are a... Dave Because I am a lawyer. Billy Yes. And during the week, you cover up those nice, gnarly tattoos with a grey flannel suit and make a nice, steady income. Dave Oh man. Tom Stubbs would love hanging out with you boys. Hey may be a politician, he may be a politician, but he ain't no square. Billy Smoke, Dave? Dave Oh, hell yes. [bong] Billy I put some mescaline in with the weed, Dave, so I'd be very careful if I were you. [laughing] You could be tripping for days. Dave I can handle it. Billy Oh yeah, I fucking love you, man. [Johnny walks over.] Billy Johnny, look at this guy. This is Dave - Dave Grossman - by day, top lawyer at Shysters, by night, a knight of the road, battling the very corporate forces he represents. Say, Dave, are you a bi-sexual? Dave Very funny. Billy I didn't think so, I guessed you just liked cock. Jonathon - bong hit? Johnny No. Hey Dave, forgive me, man - would you fuck off for a second? I got to talk to Billy. Please, Dave. Up, Dave. [Dave walks off.] Billy You look serious. Johnny What's next, man? A documentary team in here? You going to write your autobiography or something? Billy He's cool - he's a lawyer - he can help us with shit. Johnny He looks like an asshole. Billy And right now I think he's tripping his face off... Johnny Whatever. Billy Look dude, you and me, shit seems kind of tense lately, doesn't it? It's kind of lame. Have I offended you in some way? Johnny No. Billy Then what do you say we put all this shit behind us? And have some fun? [progressively louder] Because life is pain, brother. And through this life, through this brotherhood, we can give the pain the finger. Jim Yeah, fuck the pain! Johnny Yeah, yeah, you're right man. Fuck it. Billy [pressing buttons on his phone] Yeah, yeah, are you fucking kidding me?... Where?... [shouting] Alright, all of you, let's go. Let's go! Our boys are getting jumped. <begin drive> Billy The Deadbeats are shit kicking the brothers. Stick with me. <driving - following Billy to Acter Industrial - Brian dialogue - A> Johnny Brian, Brian, are you sure you want to be here? I mean, this is a man's job after all. Brian No, Johnny, nope. You're the fucking pussy, man. Johnny Shit, I can't hear you, big man. It's the wind. Speak up next time. <driving - following Billy to Acter Industrial - Brian dialogue - B> Brian So are you gonna fight alongside your brothers or are you going to join the Deadbeats? Johnny As much as I'd like to kick your ass, Brian, I could never go against a brother. Brian Yeah, not to his face at least. I bet you'd stab him in the back, though. <driving - following Billy to Acter Industrial - Billy dialogue - A> Billy See Johnny? I told you this true meant nothing. Johnny You're the one who wiped his ass on the truce to start with. Billy Pre-emptive strike, my brother. And fuck me if it wasn't the right move. <driving - following Billy to Acter Industrial - Billy dialogue - B> Billy You like Mr. David Grossman then, Johnny? He's got some business contacts that'll appeal to your newly-minted business mind. Johnny You talk and talk about sticking it to the man and then you hang out with a lawyer? You must be an American, man - you understand hypocrisy so damn well. Billy I'm a complicated individual and I've got serious authority issues. Ask my councilor! <The Lost battle the Angels of Death in an abandoned trainyard.> Billy More Deadbeats on the funeral pyre. Get on your choppers. Johnny Fuck, dude. You lost your fuckin' mind. Billy We're moving out, Johnny. Let's go. Word is there's another skirmish. Come on. <driving - following Billy to the next battle - Brian dialogue - A> Brian Bill did good back there. You could learn a lot from watching him fight. Johnny Yeah, I need to do some learning. Mind if I practice on you, Brian? Brian Wouldn't want to hurt you. I don't hit women. <driving - following Billy to the next battle - Brian dialogue - B> Johnny Man, the Deadbeats seem real annoyed. If I was you, I'd be scared they'd attack me in the street. Brian They're not going to mess with me while I'm with Bill, ha ha. No one fucks with Bill. Johnny Good thing you're glued to him, then. <They battle again at an abandoned processing facility.> Billy Saddle up, brothers. These fucks are dead. <cutscene> Billy Brothers... Brothers, come on in, gather round. Brian Hey. Billy Chill out. Brothers, I just got word that Jason's been killed up in Broker. Johnny Aw, man. Billy He was banging some Russian broad and her heavy duty father didn't much like it. Brian He hired a fucking Polack to do it. Billy I think he was a Serb, Brian. Brian Fucking Slav scumbag all the fucking same. Billy Shut the fuck up. Brothers, we will find a way to get payback against this Polish/Russian/Serb - I don't really give a shit. In the meantime, let's take a moment to remember Jason and all the other men who've given the finger to this shitty little thing that we call conformity. Brian Amen, Billy. Johnny Got that right. Billy Now, Jason was, he was just a kid, but he hit the throttle harder than most of us, huh? He was a law breaker, trouble maker, a beer drinker and hell-raiser. He didn't suffer fools, he got any piece of hole he wanted, he always had time for a brother in need, and he was scared of precisely jack shit. Johnny Right. Billy In short - the kind of man I'd want to be. Jason Michaels - lost but not forgotten. Brian Amen to that, Billy. Johnny Jason. [They drink.] Billy Okay boys, the time for pussy licking ass kicking is over. We are brothers for life, Lost forever. In these perilous times it's more important than ever that you follow your leader. And this is me, remember. See you boys back at the clubhouse. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ACTION/REACTION (#bg4) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - at The Lost MC> Billy So where did you get them from? Ray Oh, y'know from a little contact I have who really wants you to cut me out of the loop... Where'd the hell I get it? What is wrong with you? All kind of shit it out there, Billy, all you gotta do is grab it. Billy And that makes you what? A, uhh, shit grabber? Ray Huh! Shit grabber. Wow! See, I like how you did that - it was very good, very clever. Almost like a joke, y'know, only it wasn't funny. [Johnny walks in.] Billy Johnny - have you met Ray? Johnny Hey. Billy Ray Boccino. Hey, my brother. Johnny. Johnny the Jew. Ray Johnny the Jew - how the hell are you? Do me a favor - help keep this degenerate out of jail, alright, at least until he's paid me. Johnny I'll do my best. Ray Yeah, later. [exits] Johnny What's he sellin' ya? Billy Toys, my boy. Toys. Now come on, let's go. Brian Man, where we going, Bill? Billy Pay somebody a visit. Johnny Billy, man, please don't be a dick. Billy Johnny, you seem a little tense lately. Have you considered some analysis? Maybe a day spa? High colonic? Brian [laughing] Colonic! <begin drive> Billy Follow the leader, assholes. <driving - following Billy to the AOD clubhouse - Billy dialogue - A> Johnny Still lifting weights, Billy? Billy I don't need to now that I'm carrying your heavy ass around with me, Johnny. Johnny I think you've got me confused with Brian. He's the one who's permanently suckered onto your ass. <driving - following Billy to the AOD clubhouse - Billy dialogue - B> Johnny Billy, man. Just for once I'd like to know what the fuck we're doing before we do it. Billy Having delusions of grandeur, Klebitz? Johnny Shit, yeah, of course. Only the chapter president gets to know what's going on. <driving - following Billy to the AOD clubhouse - Billy dialogue - C> Johnny So is this about kicking ass and feeling like big men or are gonna make some money? Billy The two of them are not always mutally exclusive, my brother. Johnny Really? Let's see. <driving - following Billy to the AOD clubhouse - Brian dialogue - A> Johnny Brian, man. What you been doing lately. Sucking Billy's cock, I'm betting. Brian I seen a video of Ashley fucking on the internet. You're a chump, Johnny. Johnny I thought you only watched gay porn on the internet, Brian. You're into cock, right? Brian You think that's funny, asshole? Johnny Tell you what, send me a fucking link to that Ashley video. What do I care what she's up to? We're through. <driving - following Billy to the AOD clubhouse - Brian dialogue - B> Johnny Brian, man, you ever done time? Brian Only people who do time are the ones that are dumb enough to get caught. Apart from Bill. He got unlucky. Johnny It's not luck, Brian. The man wants you he's gonna come find you no matter how smart you think you are. <driving - following Billy to the AOD clubhouse - Brian dialogue - C> Johnny Don't you ever get tired of following Billy without know what's going on? Brian That's what you do with a leader, dumbass. Are you sad no one's following you, Johnny? Johnny I'd be nothing but embarassed to have you kissing my ass all day, Brian. <driving - following Billy to the AOD clubhouse - Brian dialogue - D> Johnny You ready for this shit, Brian? Brian Fucking yes, bitches. Johnny Alright then, let's fucking do it. <cutscene - at the AOD clubhouse> Billy Have I got a toy for you. [holding gun] Johnny Yeah, whatever Bill. Whaddya want? Billy What is this? Johnny What? Billy What the fuck is wrong with you, man? Johnny What are you talking about? Billy These Deadbeats are the ones who killed Jason in Broker. Johnny I thought it was a Pole or a Serb or something? Billy We got some bad information, brother. These are the guys. They killed that kid, and look at you, you're acting like you don't even give a shit. You sick or something, man? Johnny These Deadbeats killed Jason? Billy Yes they did. Now take one of these grenades and put it through their window. The Almighty forgives, Johnny. The Lost don't. [hands over gun] Brian Yeah, amen Johnny boy. <Johnny lights up the upper floor of the clubhouse. After a brief shootout with the AOD, Johnny heads inside to finish off the survivors.> <cutscene - in the basement> Billy [laughing] The Deadbeats have got themselves on shit-load of heroin. Pack it up, Johnny. [indicating two bags] Johnny Wait, I don't understand... I thought this was payback for Jason, man, what the fuck is this? Billy Two million in arm candy's as good a payback as I can think of. Come on brother. Johnny Jesus, hold your fucking horses, man. Now we're gonna steal their smack? Slow down. Billy Slown? Hold up, wait, ooohhhh. Jesus, physics lesson, fuckball. Do you know how motorcycles work? Brian You about to get schooled. Billy Centrifugal inertia. Meaning the quicker your wheels go, the more stable you are. The faster we go, the harder we hit it, the more us brothers pull together. That's why we do what we do, that's how we do what we do. Brian Why, how - they're the same fucking thing. We go faster, longer, and harder and that's how we stay together. Billy Brian. Shut up. Johnny What the fuck are you talking about? You gotta stop reading them shitty internet sites, man, and start thinking about what you're doing to us. We lift this shit right now and every Deadbeat on the east coast is gonna come after our chapter. Billy Well, that's something your leader will have to worry about. Not you, soldier. Brian, grab the shit. Let's clear out. <text message from Jim - later on> Ha ha. Johnny, I've sent you a link to the Deadbeats' website. Check it out! <email> jimfitz@LostMC.com AOD Johnny man, Check out this site, man. Fucking assholes! If ever you thought this war weren't worth fighting. www.angelsofdeathonline.com Later man, Jim <email - positive reply> Deadbeat pricks. <email - negative reply> Ain't you got better things to do than look around at shit like this on the internet? Later, man. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LIBERTY CITY CHOPPERS (#jf1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <phonecall from Jim> Johnny Hey Jim, what's up? Jim Same old bullshit, Johnny. Can you come and meet me on Aspdin over in Acter? Johnny Alright, brother. I'll be there. <cutscene - in a parking lot off Aspdin Drive> Johnny What's going on, Jim? Jim Hey, Johnny boy. You know the deal. If it ain't one load of bullshit, it's a God damn 'nother. Johnny Tell me about it. I'm coming close to really losing my shit here. Jim Well, you ain't gonna like what I'm about to do in the next few hours. Johnny What? Jim We gotta go steal some bikes from the Angels of Death. Johnny Ain't we a little too old for stealing bikes and clubhouse flags and crap like that? It don't help nothing. Jim Hey, I hear ya man. But these bikes are the real deal. Now, I got a guy who pays me for them then ships them over to Japan. Apparently they're gonna go crazy for these bikes in particular. Now business is business. And the Angels, they're the Angels. So do it for the memories. Johnny Okay. It's been a little a while since you and me been on a prank like this together, hasn't it? Jim Too right, brother, too right. Who knows, it might be fun. <begin drive> Jim I'm point on this run. Let's go. <driving - following Jim to the yard - A> Jim You been seeing much of Terry and Clay? Johnny Not really, as least not since Billy got back. Shit's been too crazy. Jim You should call them, man. They're still cool. Their heads are probably in the same kind of place as yours. Johnny Good to be riding just you and me, Jim. Jim Nice, man. Johnny Yeah, man. Fuck all that Billy shit. Let's go. <driving - following Jim to the yard - B> Johnny This is what The Lost MC is about, Jim. Hell yeah. Jim Lost for life! Johnny Yeah, man. Come on. Feels good to be doing something like this. Not just breaking heads 'cause Billy feels like it. Jim Or standing 'round kicking tires and asking what the fucks gone wrong with the chapter. Johnny Absolutely. Got to keep active, brother. Keep on moving. <get into truck> Jim They got these bikes at their place near Honkers. Drive us, will ya? <driving - heading to the AOD bikes - A> Johnny Where'd you get the van, Jim? You ain't turned into some kind of trailer queen, have you? Jim Very funny, asshole. This shit belongs to my contact. If I wanted to take a bike of mine somewhere, I'd drive it myself. Johnny Yeah? Having an old lady and kid hasn't made you scared of getting dirty? Jim I was riding bikes before your momma rode your daddy, Jonathan. Jackie and the baby, yeah it's nice and all, and shit, I mean I love them and stuff, but I'm still a brother. Lost MC, man, forever. Johnny So if Billy asked you to do something that meant you wouldn't be able to look after them for some time or, or maybe not ever...? Jim Yeah Johnny, I take your point. I'd have to think long and hard on it, okay? But I think long and hard about what I'm gonna order at Burger Shot as well. I guess I'm the thinking type of maniac. <driving - heading to the AOD bikes - B> Johnny Who's this contact then? Jim A guy Angus knows. They met at one of those bike shows. Johnny Yeah? Jim Shit. That guy knows more about tuning a bike than the rest of the brothers put together, but he's the one who can't ride one no more. Johnny Luck's a perverse thing, ain't it? How are Jackie and the kid? You haven't brought them to the house in a while. Jim Hey man, Jackie can handle herself but it ain't exactly a family friendly environment at the moment, is it? You know, when things calm down. <reach the bikes> Jim It's time to stick it to 'em, Johnny. Johnny Let's do this. Jim Get the bikes, Johnny. I'll scan the horizon. <Johnny gets a bike into the truck and the AOD begin to attack.> Jim Get the brothers on the wire, Johnny. We need us some help if we're gonna get home. <phonecall to Terry> Terry Jonathan, whatever can I do for you? Johnny Well, you could save me and Jim's hides from some angry Deadbeats. We need your help. Terry Now, you know only a Chapter Head like Billy can ask for that kind of help. So don't go telling him we're coming to ya. <With Clay and Terry's help, they kill the AOD and Johnny gets the bikes in the truck. Johnny and Jim escape more AOD pursuers on their way back to the yard.> <cutscene> Jim I always get a kick outta sticking it to them pansies. Johnny Old habits die hard, brother. Jim Yup. Johnny Too bad times weren't always this easy... [A cop car parks up.] Jim Oh shit. Johnny Be cool man. Ed Well, what do we have here? Jimmy Looks to me like a couple of mopes with some stolen bikes. Johnny These bikes are ours, Officer. Jim Nobody's gonna be reporting these bikes stolen, so give us a break. Ed Ah, looks like these mopes have outsmarted us, don't it? Jimmy Unbelievable. These inbred biker rednecks get smarter every year. Your parents musta been fuckin' brilliant siblings. Johnny Yeah, funny. Ed You think you're smart? How smart you gonna feel when we drag your old lady downtown, turn the cameras off and interrogate her real hard? Jimmy I bet she'll love it. She'll be begging us for another fucking interrogation in no fucking time. [knocks over their bikes] Johnny Aww... Ed Oh! We've been watching the Angels of Death, shitbirds. Jimmy That's right, we saw the whole thing you fucking jerk-offs. Case closed. Ed And now you're gonna fucking pay us. Just like your daddy paid your momma for sex. Jimmy Skank bitch wouldn't even give her own brother a freebie. Think of a number, assholes. And it better be a big one and while you're at it, we're gonna be watching so you better behave yourselves boys. Ed Watch it there, slim. Jimmy Assholes. [The cops drive off.] Jim Fucking cocksuckers. [resetting the bikes] Johnny Fucking pricks like those ones made me join The Lost in the first place. Jim I'm going to go back to the clubhouse, see who's around. Later, man. Johnny Later. <phonecall from Terry - later on> Terry Johnny, it's Terry. Listen, bro, I heard there's a race going down and thought you might be interested? Johnny A race? Too fucking right. I'm in, man. I'll be there as soon as I can. Terry Sounds good, brother. See you soon. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- BAD COP DROP (#jf2) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - in another lot off Aspdin Drive> Johnny Hey Jim, good to see ya man. What's the trouble? Jim Take a guess, bro. It might have something to do with those cops that pulled one over on us. Johnny I figured. Jim The way I see it we got two choices. Either, we buy a big tub of grease and prepare to take it from these fat pigs for the rest of our lives... Johnny Or? Jim Or, we head over to the clubhouse, close to where I happen to know they got themselves set up, and we show them that we're not quite the bitches they think we are. Johnny Well, tempted as I am by your first option, I'm gonna have to go with the second. Jim I figured you'd say that. Johnny Lead on, James. <cutscene - near the clubhouse> Jim Wait here a minute. [walking over to the cop car] Hey, officers, how you doin'? Jimmy Hey McCornish, this fat perp's brought us a present. Ed You know, I forgot how stupid lookin' this guy was, Matthews. You think he's smart enough to realize that we got expensive tastes? Jimmy What you got for us, mope? Jim Ah, exactly what you asked for. Jimmy Well, alright- [Jim punches him in the gut, then takes his coffee and throws it at Ed.] Jim There ya go! [He runs back to his bike.] <begin drive> Jim Make tracks to Trinity Road, John, come on. I got some brothers coming to meet us. <driving - heading to the ambush location - A> Johnny You stole his donut and spilled his coffee. Real mature, man. Jim We don't want to piss 'em off too much. Not yet, at least. <driving - heading to the ambush location - B> Jim That'll show 'em. Johnny Oh yeah. You messed with a dirty cop's donut. You're one badass biker. <reach the ambush> Jim Here's as good a place as any. <They kill the bent cops and the reinforcements they call in.> Jim We got lucky there, Johnny boy. I thought we'd be shovelling shit for those dudes 'til God knows when. Luis Now you know we ain't going out like that, Jim. I'll see you soon. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- BUYER'S MARKET (#bg5) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <text message from Billy> Go see Liz Torres. She might be able to unload some of that shit we found. If it's cool, you can collect from Brian <phonecall to Billy - optional> Johnny Liz Torres, huh? Billy Liz Torres. Keep one eye open, Johnny. You heard the tales. Johnny I heard 'em alright, but we're cool. Girl does bring heat to a deal, Billy. Every cop in this town wants that bitch's head on his wall. Billy There's cops on wiretaps waiting to bust us, and there's monsters in the closet, and every chick in this town has got VD. Shit, Johnny, you spook too easy. Get it sold. <cutscene - at Elizabeta's apartment> Lizzy Hey, hey, Johnny, the big bad biker man. Johnny Liz Torres, the meanest bitch in Bohan. Lizzy Come here, sweetie. Johnny Shit, I'd let you kiss me, but I'm afraid you'd stick a knife in my back while I was doin' it. Lizzy You wouldn't be the first man I'd tried that trick on, sweetie. Johnny Yeah, I heard the stories. Listen, I also heard you got somebody for that brown? Lizzy Maybe. There's an apartment on Cassidy Street in Schottler. You go upstairs and talk to Charlie on the third floor. Johnny There any heat? Lizzy When isn't there? I've got a new guy going along with you. He's from Eastern Europe somewheres. If the heat's coming from Charlie, use this Slavic motherfucker to help. But if it's him, you know what you gotta do. Johnny Well, either way it ain't coming back to you, Liz. Lizzy Ah, you know Playboy? He's going along, too. Hey Playboy! Playboy [dancing on the other side of the room] Yo, chill for a second yo. Johnny Nah, not really. Lizzy Don't you wanna dance? Johnny Nah, I'll just sit right here and wait for your boy. [He waits.] Lizzy [to Niko] Surround yourself with cocaine and the assholes soon follow. Hey, Johnny! Johnny Yo! Lizzy Come over here. Come here. Johnny Yeah! Lizzy Niko, this is Johnny. Now, Johnny is sitting on a big pile of heroin. I don't go near the stuff... professionally... but I found him a buyer. We're nervous. Will you oversee the deal and check everything is cool? Niko Sure. Lizzy Thank you. Johnny Well, I got to go pick up the stuff, so, uh, I'll see you there. Lizzy A'ight. <cutscene - in an alleyway in Cerveza Heights> Johnny Gimme that shit, man. We got a buyer. Brian I don't know why Billy got you to handle this and not me. I mean, what's up with that, eh? I guess you Semites are good at sniffing out a deal, ain't that right, Johnny? Johnny He didn't get you because Liz Torres, and any other two-bit hustler on the street, would take you for the little pussy that you are and rob you blind. Now gimme that shit. [takes it] See you around, big guy. <cutscene - at the apartment in Schottler> Niko Hey, you ready? Johnny Sure, let's do this. Nothing like selling some dope to let you know you're alive. Niko Let's go. PB X Yeah, let's do this. Johnny Alright, c'mon. [They walk into the room.] Charlie Hey... what's going on guys, what's going on? Johnny Not much. Let's do this. Charlie You've got the heroin? Right? Right? Johnny Come on, let's do this, quickly. Charlie But you've got the heroin, correct? You're carrying it, correct? I mean it's a simple question. Johnny What's wrong with you? You're being fucking weird. Charlie Not weird, man. I just wanna know if you're carrying the stuff right? Johnny You ain't right, friend, come on... let's get out of here. [Niko, Playboy, and Johnny run out as Charlie pulls out a gun.] Charlie LCPD. Freeze motherfucker. I said freeze. Johnny Get the fuck outta here. I'll go down, you go up. Good luck. <phonecall to Billy - after losing the cops> Billy So Johnny, are we rich? Johnny No Billy, we're not. What we are is under observation by some kind of LCPD drugs task force. The buyer was a pig. Billy Hell, Johnny, that's not kosher. I'll call you when another buyer's lined up. Johnny Sounds good. Billy We're moving up in the world, Johnny. There's a Congressman, needs your help, Tom Stubbs III. I told you keeping that lawyer around would have its uses. This guy's at one of them dumb ass gentlemen's clubs in Algonquin - the kind without tits - The Jousters. Johnny Politicians and lawyers? What are we becoming, man? Next thing you're gonna tell me we're doing some shit kicking for the LCPD. Billy It's just opposite the Libertonian. Go pay him a visit, if you're still thinking about your brothers and not just your own ego, that is. <phonecall from Elizabeta - later on> Johnny Liz Torres. Lizzy It was good to see you, Johnny. Johnny Yeah, only problem was your friend the UC. He nearly blew my ass off. Lizzy Ha ha, ha ha. Johnny How's your fancy European friend working out? Lizzy Okay, okay. Seems like maybe he's the only guy in this city not working for the state. Johnny Him and The Lost MC. Me and the brothers are tight. Lizzy I hope so for your sake, Johnny, you know. Ha ha. See you soon, baby. <phonecall from an unknown caller - later on> Johnny Hello. Jones Johnny Klebitz? Johnny Yeah. Who is this? Jones You tried to offload some smack to a colleague of mine called Charlie. Costly mistake. Johnny Who the fuck is this? Jones Agent Jones - FIB. We'd like you to come in for a talk. Things might be easier for you if you give us some information on your motorcycle club. Johnny Fuck you, fed. This conversation's over. If you got any evidence on me, get a warrant. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- POLITICS (#ts1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - at The Jousters> Leavis Do you have an appointment? Johnny Uhh... no, I thought I'd inquire about a membership. Leavis Excuse me? Johnny Uhh, yeah, under this ravaged, drug-addled exterior lies the heart of a reactionary prick, so I thought I'd fit right in here. Leavis I think you should leave, sir, before I call the police. Johnny "I think you should leave, sir, before I..." Dude, it's the twenty- first century. Let me tell you something... You've got a job wiping rich pricks' asses, and for some reason you seem a little pleased with yourself. Leavis Will you leave? Johnny Trust me, man, nothing would please me more, but I'm supposed to see Tom Stubbs and, well, he said to meet him here. Leavis Oh, Mr. Stubbs, sir. Okay, you only had to say so, sir. Follow me, will you. Mr. Stubbs is in the day spa, receiving some back work. Johnny Right you are. [They head into the back where Stubbs is getting a massage.] Leavis Mr. Stubbs. A gentleman for you. Stubbs Thank you, Leavis... And thank you. [Leavis leaves.] Stubbs So you're David Grossman's friend? Johnny Oh yeah, we're old, old buddies. Stubbs Love the old boy network. Johnny Yeah, I can imagine. So what is it that you want? Stubbs Can you excuse us, sugar? Sugar Okay, sure. Stubbs And thank you, best massage I ever had that didn't involve a happy ending or a poignant sense of guilt afterwards. Sugar See you tomorrow. [Stubbs gets to his feet, completely in the nude.] Stubbs Tom Stubbs. How do you do? Johnny Well, now that you mention it... I'm starting to feel a little queasy. Stubbs Don't be pathetic, and no secrets here, pal. Now, listen, I'm in a bit of a bother, sport. Johnny Well, I think they can fix that with surgery these days, you know. Stubbs Can we stop with the jokes? Grossman tells me you're reliable. Johnny Grossman? That guy's an asshole. Stubbs Look, I'm not going to insult your intelligence by pretending to be a good guy. I'm a politician. I'm a cynic. I'm very needy. I need people to like me. I need people to like me so that they elect me. I need people to elect me so that I feel marginally less bad about myself when I stare into the mirror. That being said, I try to do a good deed here and there. Johnny Democracy's a beautiful thing. Stubbs Personally, I'd prefer a benign dictatorship without the pretense of choice, but let's leave the political discussions, shall we? Johnny Yes, let's. Stubbs Unfortunately, an awful man has insured that my chance of being re- elected is pretty much zero. Johnny Why? Blackmail? Stubbs Not exactly. I need his money, and he hasn't died. Johnny What? You want me to kill your father? Stubbs No, that's disgusting. How could you suggest such a thing? My father died years ago, thank God. No, my uncle. That sanctimonious do-gooder controls the family trust. Johnny Whoa, that's heavy, man. Stubbs Yes, so is being arrested for drug-running and spending the next thirty years in prison. You and your little gang, I mean. Johnny I see. You make a wonderful politician. Stubbs I know. Now, you've got to get the old goat today. Make it spectacular. Make it appear as though it's a terrorist act - that'll do wonders for my campaign in all sorts of ways. Leavis will give you a package on the way out. Oh, and Klebitz, trust me... I am what I am, but I look out for those who help me. Johnny A blackmailer with a conscience, beautiful. <text message from Stubbs> Something about faked terrorist acts gets me all excited, Klebitz. You can either take out the chopper as it lands or deal with the convoy as it makes its way out of the airport. By the way, I've got a man at the Southwest gate who can help you if you get locked into the runway area. - TS III <text message from Stubbs - after killing his uncle> My sources tell me you've been locked inside the airport. There's a man at the Southwest gate who can attack it for you. - TS III <phonecall to Stubbs - after escaping the cops> Stubbs Okay, Klebitz. Give me the good news. I'm just about happy with the eulogy my researchers drafted up. Johnny Sadly, Stubbs, I'm not going to be able to disappoint you. Your uncle is no longer with us. For my conscience's sake, I hope your lack of humanity is a genetic quality. Stubbs Ah, he was a man of the people, a philanthropist, a pompous windbag and an occasional catamite, a typical Stubbs you might say. Sleep easy and drop into the club sometime soon. <phonecall from Jim - later on> Jim Johnny, it's Jim, you wanna roll on some Deadbeats? Johnny What a fantastic idea, James. I'll see you at yours. Jim Great, man. See you soon. <phonecall from Jim - later on> Johnny Hello there, James. How ya doin'? Jim Getting through it, brother - just about. Listen, that guy we stole those Angels of Death bikes for, he's got a whole shoppin' list of bikes he wants. You interested in procuring them for him? Johnny As long as it ain't gonna get us in the shit any more dirty cops. Jim Them cops ain't around no more. Get Angus on the wire when you're ready to roll. He's got the details. So long, brother. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OFF ROUTE (#ts2) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - at The Jousters> Leavis Ahh, Mr. Stubbs is expecting you. Johnny Hey, how ya doing, man? Leavis Oh yes, sir. Hello, sir. I'm fine. Johnny Good. Hey, let me ask you something... Do you really enjoy life? Leavis I don't really know what you mean, sir. Johnny I mean, does serving all these rich morons, you know... smell of money and all that stuff, you know, does that make you happy? Leavis Yes, sir, something like that. And tell me, sir, are you happy? I mean, has giving the man the, err, finger, really satisfied some inner urge within you, sir? Johnny Well, I think what I've learned is that there's always a man, dude. He just wears a different uniform. Leavis As you say, sir. Ah, Mr. Stubbs is in the steam room. Right this way. [Leavis takes him in back to Stubbs.] Stubbs Klebitz! How ya doing, sport? Johnny Hey. I'm fully clothed in a steam room with a murdering politician, while my whole life falls to shit all around me. But fuck it, I'm alright. Miss your uncle? Stubbs Oh, I've doubled up on the therapy. Johnny Change your therapist. Stubbs Oh, but I've been seeing Dr. White since I was seven. The man's a genius. Johnny Okay. What can I do for you, man? I'm not really dressed for this and you said it was urgent. Stubbs Yes, well, there's been a clerical error down in the deepest recesses of the Civic Citadel. A group of outstanding civlians, voters, have mistakenly been taking into LCPD custody. Johnny Well, isn't there something you can do about that yourself, man? Pull some strings or something? Stubbs No, I'm afraid not sport, way too far down the line for that. Too much red tape, yadda yadda yadda... No, all you need to know is that, uh, these gentlemen are in a prison transport bus, and you, my friend, need to liberate them. Johnny Sure, I got it. Stubbs The bus is at the Leftwood Police Station. Get them out of there and we will make it worth your while. Johnny Okay, I got it. Stubbs Don't sweat it, Klebitz. <Johnny breaks into Leftwood Station and reaches the prison bus.> <cutscene> [Johnny hops into the bus and knocks out the driver. One of the prisoners grabs the other policeman aboard and pulls him to the floor.] Johnny Whoa. Guy You're the best tasting thing I've had since I got locked up. Johnny That's intense. Alright! Since we've all, uh, eaten, we've got a new destination, people. [Johnny throws the driver out and takes the wheel.] <escape the cops> Johnny Can you keep it down? In case you ain't noticed, I'm trying to keep you boys outta prison. Guy 2 The rendezvous is by the Globe Oil plant in the Acter Industrial Park. <driving - heading to the rendezvous - A> Johnny So, umm, what're you folks in for? Guy For these fellas it's white collar shenanigans. Caught with their hand in the cookie jar. My greed was of a... more corporeal nature. Johnny I'm gonna take that as meaning you were into some sick shit. Let's not discuss it. Guy As you wish, dear boy. Johnny I'm guessing it wasn't you I got paid to bail out anyways. Guy I doubt those who remember me think it a great idea that I am about to be roaming free again. Johnny Okey dokey then. <driving - heading to the rendezvous - B> Guy So, you're a motorcyclist? What hardware do you grip between those thighs? A panhead, shovelhead, V-twin? Johnny You a bike man? Guy I'm familiar with mechanics. I believe it's man's duty to take things apart and see how they work. Johnny Sure. Guy You learn so much from seeing the insides of things. Cars, bikes... we are all machines. Johnny You got real problems, brothers. Guy And everything in your garden is rosey. How nice! I wager one could learn a lot about my fellow prisoners by seeing how they're wired. Johnny Learn all you like, just wait until I'm paid, mister. <reach the rendezvous> Guy Thank you, sir. My fellow prisoners and I are most grateful. We've got a boat to catch. [singing as he leaves] Oh, I do like to be beside the seaside. Oh, I do like to be beside the sea. Oh, I do like to walk along the prom, prom, prom, where the brass bands play fidaly bum, bum, bum, bum. Johnny Bon voyage. <phonecall to Stubbs> Johnny Your friends are out to sea, Mr. Stubbs. Good luck to them. I think they'll need it. Stubbs Oh, don't you worry, those boys don't need luck. You shoulda seen them in '73. Believe me, a short recession and a trip to Panama isn't going to finish those boys off. All traders by blood. Great genes. Johnny I was thinking their problem might lie with one of the other passengers on their little cruise. Later on, Mr. Congressman. <phonecall from Stubbs - later on> Stubbs Ah, Johnny boy, how's it going out there? Johnny More shit storm than steam room, Congressman. We weren't all born into money. Stubbs No, some of us married into it. Ha ha ha. Johnny And some of us killed for it. You got any work for me, man? Stubbs Well, now that you mention it, there might be a few things that need to be handled discretely. Call me if you feel up to it, sport. Bye now. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- COMING DOWN (#ab1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <phonecall from Ashley> Johnny Ash? Ashley Johnny boy? John. I need some help. Johnny I ain't got a hand-out for ya. Sorry. Ashley A hand-out ain't gonna fix it, Johnny boy. I'm into something bad. I need a knight in shining armor to take me away from this mess. They're gonna kill me... or worse. Johnny Jesus, Ash. Where are ya? Ashley Some project on Wardite. Come quick, baby. Johnny I'll try. <phonecall to Ashley - optional> Ashley You here, Johnny? Johnny I'm close. Which apartment are you in? Ashley Shit, Johnny, I don't know. It had a red door. Hurry up, I'm crashing hard. <phonecall to Ashley - optional> Ashley Johnny, Johnny, they're gonna hurt me bad. Johnny Don't worry, Ash, I'm coming. I just need some help finding it. Ashley Can't you hear us? These freaks are partying real hard, man. Please. <phonecall to Ashley - optional> Ashley I can't wait much longer, sugar. Johnny I need more information, Ash. Ashley Just look for the strung-out tweekers. Please. Come on, baby. <Johnny enters the building and kills several addicts that attack him.> <cutscene> Johnny These guys can't hurt you no more, baby. You sure know how to get yourself into trouble, don't ya, baby? Ashley And you sure know how to get me out, Johnny. Johnny Come 'ere. [helping her up] Ashley What's wrong? I don't want to hang out here. Can we go? Johnny I don't wanna hang out here neither. Then again, I'm not the one messing up my head on a week-long ice binge. Ashley I remember when you used to mess around at my place, that don't happen any more either. Take me home, man, I'm crashing hard. <driving - taking Ashley to her place - A> Johnny You alright? Ashley I'm with you now, Johnny boy. How could I not be? Johnny How long you been up? Two days? Three? Ashley Who's counting? Johnny It ain't good for you, you know that. Ashley Sure, sure. Do you expect me to stay clean when you're not there to look after me? Johnny Maybe if you answered your calls... Fuck, whatever. Ashley Okay, I'm bad, baby. I know it. You should teach me a lesson. Hit me or something. Teach me I'm wrong. Johnny Enough of that. Ashley Teach me, baby. It's the only way I'll learn. Make me hurt. Johnny You're making yourself hurt already, you fucking idiot. Ashley Hit me. Johnny Give me a break, sweetheart. I used to fucking love you. Ashley You're too sweet for words, Johnny boy. You think I'm sweet too? Johnny You ain't good for me, sugar. That's all I know. <driving - taking Ashley to her place - B> Johnny God, Ashley. Sometimes I wish I didn't care about you. Ashley Oh, baby. You don't mean that, do you? You're all I've got. Johnny Me and the crystal, of course. Ashley I told you, I'm not friends with Tina no more. I ain't gonna lose me to meth... Johnny Well, you lost me to it. Ashley So, Billy's back. How's things? Johnny Don't you know? Haven't you two been seeing anything of each other? Ashley No... yeah. He's around, isn't he? Johnny Something's around. Not the Billy I knew. Not the Billy that me want to lead this life in the first place. Ashley Oh man, Johnny. You keep talking about how people have changed. Don't you think maybe you're the one who's different? Johnny Fuck you, Ashley. I ain't changed. I stuck to the code I set myself. You try and live by what makes sense, take your own path, and it burns you out. Ashley You're funny, Johnny. You care about everyone else when they're fire. And you end up tying yourself in a knot. Johnny Yeah, everything in my life's fucking fantastic. <cutscene - at Ashley's place> Johnny Hm. Nice place you got here, sugar. Ashley Not now, honey. I ain't feelin' so good. Johnny I thought you'd said you stopped smoking that stuff? Ashley I did, Johnny boy, I did. I promise. I never lied to you. Johnny Come on, baby. That's crap and you know it. Ashley I never lied to you when I was sober. Johnny Well, my whole life's falling to shit, sweetheart. I guess it was dumb of me to think this would be any different. Ashley I'm sorry. I know I ain't much, but I'm all yours. You do know that, baby, don't you? Johnny If you say so. Ashley I love you, Johnny. Thanks for saving me again. Johnny Yeah, yeah. Ashley Hey, you know what? We're better than this. We can... we can live better than this. Johnny Yeah, well let's hope so. Ashley Say the word, honey. Take that bike. We'll ride off into the sunset, you and me. Johnny You, me, and that little habit of yours. Ashley You're my habit, Johnny. [coughing] Johnny And you are ridiculous. <phonecall to Ashley - optional> Ashley If it isn't my white knight. My saviour. Johnny K. Johnny I ain't your saviour, baby. I might have beaten up a few pimps and pushers, but I'm never gonna save you from yourself. I learned that a long time ago. Ashley That's the old me. I'm clean now. I'm off the meth, and all that shit. Johnny Didn't seem like that when I last saw you. Just checking you're okay. Bye, Ash. <phonecall to Angus - optional> Angus Jonathan. What's happening in the world of the walking? Johnny Same old shit, man. Saw Ashley. Angus Of course you did. How is the old girl? Still the same spark? Johnny The only spark left is in her meth pipe. That shit's killing her. Angus Fuck, I seen what it does to some of the brothers, man. If you love her enough, you can help her. Johnny It's past that, dude. We're over. Long gone. Angus But you're still helping her out of fixes? If it's over, you got to end it completely. Johnny Yeah, I know it, but you know me, always had a soft spot for someone in trouble. Thanks for the advice, man. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- THIS SHIT'S CURSED (#bg6) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <text message from Billy> We need your input in a discussion, John. Come in the house. <phonecall to Billy - optional> Billy Why aren't you here, Johnny? Johnny What's the problem? Billy The problem is we can't have a real discussion, and can't solve any real fuckin' problems, if you aren't gonna come to the house and sit down with your brothers. Are you too good for that now, Johnny? Johnny No, man, I'm coming. Chill the fuck out. <cutscene - at The Lost MC> Jim Billy, I just don't see how we have a choice, man. Billy I have a choice. I'm free, I'm not a slave, I have a choice. Jim, I love you man, but since you've hit middle age, you've really lost something... Jim Yeah, and since you've fucking been strung out on this shit you've lost something - your fucking mind. Brian Easy Jim, look who the fuck you're speaking to, huh? Johnny [enters] What's up? Billy Hey, I'm just trying to explain to our friend here that possession is nine tenths of the law - we should make the slopes pay us back. Terry [shouting] Billy, I've got Chad on the phone! Johnny Pay us back for what? Billy Look, we have a business opportunity here, Johnny. I think a guy like you should be pleased. Johnny Yeah, but Jim says there's some problem. Jim There is. That H we stole - it belonged to the Chinese. The Deadbeats told them we got it and they want it back. Johnny So? Fuck 'em. Billy Finally! Terry [walks over] Billy, Chad's on the phone about the meeting. [Billy flips him off, he walks back.] Jim Look, normally I'd be down for that, but these aren't the type of dudes you say "fuck 'em" to. They're some heavily-armed, pissed off motherfuckers, who killed a couple of Angels when they found out their shit was gone. Now, I'm thinking maybe we can strike up a deal with them. Johnny Okay. Billy Okay? Why don't you just suck 'em off while you're at it? [shouting] And tell Chad I'm sober as can be over here. Johnny Look, I just think that given this war we're back into with the Angels of Death, and given the fact that one or possibly two government agencies are looking into our shit, that offloading the heroin would be a good idea, alright? And looking for a fight is the wrong thing to do right now, given the fact that we can't even stop fighting amongst ourselves! Billy Yeah, you're right, we probably should all get into a circle, hold hands, pray, and sing Kum Ba Yah. Brian [laughing] Kum Ba Yah! Johnny Yeah, whatever... This ain't no laughing matter, Billy. We'll either end up dead in the ground, or back in the lockup with you! Billy I ain't going back there. I'd rather be dead. Brian Damn straight. Johnny Well you don't have to do either, man. I just think that getting rid of that stuff now is the right thing to do. [Billy looks over at Brian who shrugs.] Billy Okay. <driving - following Billy to Chinatown - Billy dialogue - A> Johnny Cops are poking around, Bill. We should chill out. Billy You haven't been talking, have you? Don't go forgetting what happened when Horse sang his little ditty. Johnny I'll never talk to a pig. But there's a lesson to be learned, alright. <driving - following Billy to Chinatown - Billy dialogue - B> Billy Johnny, you're wasting away, man. I think it's all the worrying you do. Why don't you hit the weights later? Johnny You're not as big as those days when you hit the 'roids either, William. Billy My arms might not be, but there's other parts that are a lot bigger now that I'm off the drugs. Just ask Ashley. <driving - following Billy to Chinatown - Brian dialogue - A> Brian Giving it up to the slopes, it don't feel right. Johnny Well, Billy says we're doing it. So get doing it. Brian I'm not the one with the authority problem, Johnny. <driving - following Billy to Chinatown - Brian dialogue - B> Johnny You ever had a girlfriend, Brian? Brian Not gonna waste my time with that crap. I got the brothers. All the hole I need at the house, man. Yeah! Johnny Too right, man. Guy like you shouldn't waste his time with all that shit. <driving - following Billy to Chinatown - Jim dialogue - A> Jim I'm surprised Billy agreed to this. It's the first smart move he's made since gettin' out of rehab. Johnny Yeah. Maybe he's starting to calm down. Jim Maybe he's stuck too much of that brown into his arm, then. <driving - following Billy to Chinatown - Jim dialogue - B> Johnny How'd you find out that H belonged to the Triads? Jim They got word out all over town. Brought it into Liberty on a ship called the Platypus a few weeks back. Johnny Shit, Jim. You're just a font of information, aren't you? <cutscene - at the building in Chinatown> Billy Alright. Jim, Johnny, since you two were both so vocal in support of this deal, you two are going to be the ones to hand over the brown to the slopes. Johnny What? What are you and your boy here going to be doing? Billy We are gonna watch your backs, because unlike this fat man here, I just don't trust those little yellow bastards. Good luck. Brian Hey, they don't need luck, we're looking out for them. Johnny This better be cool, man. [Johnny and Jim walk inside.] Brian So Johnny, this, uh, umm... [They encounter the Triads on the top floor and set the heroin down.] Jim Okay. Johnny We gonna be cool and do this thing? Triad So let me get this straight. You are here to sell us back our heroin? The heroin my cousins sweated over in order to bring to this country only to have it stolen? Johnny Look, man, we can do business or go to war, it's your call. [The Triads pull out guns and grab the cases of heroin. Johnny and Jim run.] Triad In this country they seem to be the same thing, you stupid pieces of shit! Johnny Fuck you! <They fight the Triads across the rooftops.> <cutscene - outside the building> [Johnny and Jim watch from above as Billy is surrounded by police.] Billy You set me up, Johnny! You set me up! LCPD Put your hands in the air. Now! Billy Fuck you, Johnny! You're dead! LCPD Shut your God damn mouth, shut your mouth! Billy You're dead! LCPD Shut up! [They arrest Billy.] Johnny This shit is fucked up. <phonecall to Brian> Brian Johnny Klebitz. Johnny Brian, man. Shit's fucked. Billy's been taken down. Where are you? Brian Bill, yeah, he's fucked now. Thanks to you. I'm around the corner. Johnny We're coming. Wait there. <driving - returning to The Lost MC> Johnny Important question, Brian. What happened there? Billy said these Triads were ready to deal. Brian You must have fucked shit up, Johnny. Billy never wanted to make nice in the first place. Johnny Fine, okay. I'm just hoping my brothers didn't send me into an ambush. Brian Why couldn't you save Billy? Jim What do you mean? Johnny and I were getting jumped. Why weren't you helping Billy? Brian I had to help myself, man. I mean, I can't be expected to... Billy doesn't have any beef, he's not trucking any bad shit with me. Johnny Brian, man, what the fuck were you and Billy doing while those Triads jumped on me and Jim? Brian We were watching your back, man. Looking out for you brothers. Doing more than you did for Billy. Jim That's bullshit. If you were looking out for us, where were you when me and Johnny had to fight our way outta there? Johnny, man. We got to have a meet for all the brothers when we get back. Tell 'em what happened. Brian Yeah. I'm real keen to tell the brothers what went down. Johnny Alright, Brian. I'd like to know what the fuck went down as well. Jim You're gonna have to take over the chapter presidency, Johnny. Only thing for it. Brian Not if I got anything to say on it. Not if Billy hears about this. Jim Save it for Church, Brian. <cutscene - at The Lost MC> Brian Jesus. That was heavy, man. Fuck it. Johnny What was Billy's fucking problem? Brian Nothing wrong with him, buddy. You two want us to end up all dead? Man, Billy was right about you. I knew you were a rat, now he's gone, man. Johnny He's not dead. Brian You ratted him out! You ratted him out! Johnny No I didn't. He nearly got me fucking killed. Brian You set us up. You've always wanted to be the one - the man. You're a gimp, Johnny. A gimp and a fucking Judas. Johnny What the fuck are you talking about, you ass kissing little weasel? Jim Hey, Brian, Johnny's not like that, man. Brian Jim, you're wrong, man. I know you're a good guy, but this Jew prick, he fucked us over, man. He set us up and he called the cops. And you know why? Because they're putting heat on him. They saw him and they've been calling him... I know, because they did the same to me, and they told me you ratted us out. Johnny You keep talking like that and you are dead, my little friend. Brian Fuck you, man. Johnny What? Brian You sent Billy to jail. Show us your phone, prove you ain't been speaking to the law. Johnny I don't prove shit to you and I didn't talk to no one. Fuck it... C'mon! Jim You stay away from us, you hear? [Johnny and Jim run around the corner.] Johnny Okay, Jim. I guess I got to take over as Chapter President now. When people hear about Billy going down, there's gonna be more pressure on us than ever. We got to get through it. Brothers for life, man, Lost forever. I'll see you soon. <phonecall to Angus - optional> Angus Hey, Johnny. Johnny Did you hear? Angus I heard. How you feel about the chapter presidency? Johnny I wish it didn't have to be this way, but we don't got much choice. Angus That crown feeling heavy, is it? For what it's worth, I'd follow you, man. I'm sure the other brothers will too. Those that're worth having behind you, at least. Johnny Those that aren't gonna stab me in the back. You gonna go see Billy? I don't think I can after what he said. Angus He wouldn't want me there either. Adios, Johnny boy, chapter president. <email> angus@LostMC.com LOST MC Brother, So it's come to this. The Lost MC showing that it was all a load of bullshit and all them oaths we swore really never meant shit to anyone. Well, Johnny, you got my blessing. I'm with you, all the way. If I weren't in a fucking chair, I'd kill them fucks myself. They ain't human beings, let alone brothers. They are scum. Real low life scum. You got my blessing. Do what's got to be done. Ride safe, Angus <email - positive reply> Amen to that brother. <email - negative reply> Shit's fucked up brother. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HIT THE PIPE (#jf3) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - in a parking lot in Northwood> Jim I'm just an American - I like an American bike. Malc Yeah, I understand. You older, grandpa, so you like a more sedate ride. Some older, mature shit. Jim I'll give you mature shit, Malc. [Johnny walks up.] Jim Hey. Malc Hey, yo, who that? Jim Malc, DeSean, Johnny. Brother of mine. Malc Aight? Johnny Hey. DeSean Wassup? Jim Malc's got us a connection, Johnny. Johnny I'm good, man, I don't need one of them hairdryers. Malc Oh yeah, you sure now? Jim No, no, some serious hardware. Malc's got us a connection that ain't got nothing to do with bikes. Johnny Oh yeah? Jim Yeah. Explosives. Malc That's right. Johnny Okay. Jim With this, we could take the Angels of Death out of business for a long, long time. Johnny Oh, you think? With that it looks like we could take the whole fucking town out of business. Jim So what do you say... Are you down? Johnny Aw man, you got to ask a question like that? Looks like you're going senile or something, man. Jim That's what I thought you'd say. Malc Yo, you fools have fun. But remember this - you get into any trouble, you ain't meet me. Johnny Malc, I don't know where you got that shit, man, but one thing's for sure, we will have fun. Malc Aight, play nice. Jim Later, Malc. Johnny Later. <Johnny tracks down and destroys some AOD vans.> <phonecall to Jim> Jim Jonathan? Johnny Job done, my man. Those Deadbeats ain't a problem and you introduced me to your new friends. Jim Yeah, Malc and DeSean are good guys. No bullshit. Apart from the hairdryers they ride. Seriously, man. You should start using the brothers more now that you're in charge. Give Terry or Clay a call if you ever need some help on club business. Might even do them some good to get off their asses. Later on. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- END OF CHAPTER (#jf4) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - on a street corner in Berchem> Jim Hey, here comes the big man. Johnny Gentlemen. Jim What's happening Johnny? Johnny Hey, what's the plan? Jim We spoke to that fat fuck Brian. He wants to sit down, call a truce. Johnny Brian wants a truce? Fuck that, let's go get him. Jim That's what I thought you'd say. <driving - heading to the meet in Port Tudor - A> Jim Looking forward to seeing Brian? Johnny Maybe you should do the talking, man. I don't know if I can trust myself. Jim Hey man, last thing I want is to talk to that sniveling little shit bag. Johnny These are tough times. How's Jackie feel about what's going down? Jim She just doesn't want to see the kid grow up without a father. Johnny None of us do, James. Don't worry about that. <driving - heading to the meet in Port Tudor - B> Jim I got another one of those calls from the cops or the feds or whoever. Johnny What'd you say to 'em? Jim I told them to go fuck themselves. I may be an asshole, but I won't talk about my brothers. That much I do know. When this shit calms down, you should come round and see the kid. Johnny Yeah, I'd like that. Jim Jackie cooks a mean pot roast, man. I live for that shit. <cutscene - in Port Tudor> Brian Here comes Tweedle Dum and Tweedle fucking Dumber. Billy was always good to you and you ratted him out. Johnny Billy is a one-way SOB, and he don't give a shit about the brothers. Brian No, nuh-uh. Johnny You think Billy'd stick his neck out for you? You're dumber than I thought. Brian "You're dumber than I thought, you're dumber than I thought." I knew you'd say, just knew you'd say that. You're so predictable, Johnny Little-dick-o-witz. Jim Waaaa. What a baby. Johnny Yeah, and your babysitter Billy is on the inside now. So it's bedtime for you, motherfucker. Get the fuck out of town. Brian Not your call, Jew boy. You're the one taking a nap. Put these assholes in the ground, brothers. <Johnny, Jim, Terry, and Clay battle with Brian's faction and chase down several that attempt to escape. Brian himself escapes in the chaos.> Jim Looks like we're about all that's left of the Alderney chapter, man. Johnny We don't need numbers, man. We need brothers. And that's what we got left - you, me, Angus, Terry, Clay - brothers. Jim You're right about that. Johnny Shit, I wish we'd pinned down Brian. That little weasel. Jim He'll turn up soon enough. Johnny Yeah. Maybe. See you soon, brother. <phonecall to Angus - optional> Angus My brother. Johnny Just when you thought shit couldn't get worse... Angus You go and start a civil war. Johnny Hey, Brian fucking started it. No, wait, fucking Billy started it. Angus That don't sound very presidential. Johnny Well, I'm president of a bunch of Alderney piss lickers, not the whole nation, so I'm gonna sound how I like, that being my fucking presidential right. Angus Alright, man. I'm just saying, do what's best for the brothers. Not what's best for your pride. Johnny I will, dude. Later on. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- BAD STANDING (#jf5) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - on a street corner in Leftwood> Ray Gentlemen. Jim Johnny. You remember Ray, right? Johnny Yeah. How you doing? Ray How'm I doin'? I got the feds all over me, I got a bossz who's a paranoid wreck, and I got a guy above me in the foodchain with a brain like an overcooked artichoke. Things are great. Johnny Yeah? Sounds like shit to me, but whatever. So, uh, why are you here? Ray I heard you boys were having a little internal dispute. Johnny Where'd you hear that from? Ray From Ashley. Johnny You friends with Ashley? Ray Everybody's friends with Ashley, tough guy... [laughing] Ah, you know, she's a good kid and all. A little messed up, but, you know, she needed a friend. Jim Ray told us where Brian is. Johnny Oh yeah, where? And how the hell does he know? Ray Alright, alright, alright. Don't go breakin' my balls, alright? I talked to Brian a half an hour ago. And listen, I understand where you guys are coming from - and on one hand, I don't give a shit. Bunch of grease monkeys want to have an all-out gangbang, be my guest. You're all adults. Sort of. But right now, I need calm. Billy's on the inside, I need a steady flow of merchandise, so it's in my interest to see that you boys calm things down. End this little squabble and get back to work. See yous later. Jim Yeah, see ya later, Ray... So what do ya think, Johnny? Johnny I think that guy makes my skin crawl, but now that you mention it, so does Brian, and right now he's our problem. Terry God dammit, Brian was my brother. Johnny Yeah he was, but so were a lot of people. I don't feel like that shit means too much anymore. Jim So? Johnny So I'm going to go pay Brian a visit, see just what that fat fucker's problem is. See y'all later. <Johnny either smokes Brian out and kills him outside or fights his way inside to confront him.> Brian Please, Johnny, please. I'll be good. I'll leave and never come back. You wouldn't kill a brother, you wouldn't. I'll be a ghost man, gone! You swore an oath, Johnny. Don't do this to your brother, man. I'll get out of town. Lost MC forever, my brother. Don't do it. I'll leave the city, I promise you, man. Billy put me up to it, please. I'll disappear. Johnny, man. Billy put me up to it. I'll get out of town. <execute Brian> Brian I'm sorry! Please! Johnny Come on. For once, do not be a bitch. You've got to take it like a man. [Johnny shoots him in the head.] Johnny Fuck you, Brian. <phonecall to Jim - choose to kill Brian> Jim Jonathan, where's Brian? Johnny Halfway to Hell, my brother. We don't need to worry about that little fucker pulling nothing. Jim Well, until Billy gets out of prison, at least. Stay in touch. <choose to spare Brian> Johnny I couldn't do it to a brother, even him. He's dead inside anyway. <phonecall to Jim - choose to spare Brian> Jim Johnny? Johnny James, I couldn't do it, man. He's getting out of town. It's hard to kill a man when he isn't behaving like one. Jim I know what you mean. Let's just hope he's not planning anything else. Later on, man. <text message from Jim - later on> You should sleep in Brian's old apartment - he won't be turning up there again. Sure beats that old bed at the clubhouse. <email> email@example.com key bro Dear John, I hope this mail finds you well and happy and law abiding. I doubt the later, but a brother can hope, can't he? I got shot at yesterday and saw someone have their leg blown off. I saw three kids die last week. My life is one long orgy of death and horror. At least I know I am on the right side. I miss you, man. You have a heart. What about the life you chose led you to make such stupid choices? Billy Grey? Give me a break. He always was an arsehole. Back in the neighborhood, he was a jackass thinking he was Jesus on an acid trip when we were fifteen and you were 10. That was a long time ago. I hope you don't still look up to that asshole, pardon my fucking French. You will throw your life way. For a guy who wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire. I know we've been over this a thousand times, but my life is kind of stressful right now. Look after yourself, Mikey <email - positive reply> Thanks for your input Mikey. I miss you, man. I think about you, but I made different choices to you. Doesn't seem like either of our choices panned out so good. We both get shot at. And both of us are fighting other people's battles. Look after yourself. John. <email - negative reply> Blah, Blah, Blah. At least I know what I'm fighting for. Look after yourself. John. <email> firstname.lastname@example.org RE:hey bro John, You always were a smart ass with all the answers. I have a country. You have nothing. Mom and Dad were right about you, you smug little shit. I will fuck you up when I see you. Mark my words. Disrespecting me like that. And my country. My country. I've seen men die for that shit, you junkie piece of shit. And happily. You would only die for drugs or money. You're a rat, not a man. Your brother, Mikey <email - positive reply> I love you too bro. And out of a place of love I make one comment - you get on some very strong medication to deal with the fact you've lost your fucking mind, you messianic dip shit. <email - negative reply> Whoa. Dude? You should talk to a head doctor. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HEAVY TOLL (#et1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <text message from Elizabeta> Johnny! I spoke to your friend Jim and he says you need work. He's sending a friend of his called Malc as well. Meet me at the apartment. - Liz <cutscene - at Elizabeta's apartment> Andreas You know, chico, hold up. Where you think you're going, man? You got to hold up in here, I'm talking to you, alright? Lizzy Johnny! Back off of him, you stupid shit. Can't you tell the difference between a narc and one of my upstanding business associates? I'm sorry about Andreas here. It's impossible to find good help in this city. Johnny Don't worry about it. Andreas I'm supposed to protect you, okay? It's my job. Malc What up, Johnny boy? We talked to your girl. Let's make it happen, captain. Lizzy I didn't you Lost bikers got down with peoples like Malc here. Them with their sports bikes, you with your choppers. Hell, looking at the two of you don't make no sense to me. It's a crazy city. Johnny Well, this is crazy times, Liz. There's a recession going on, and in this troubling economic climate, you gotta make compromises. Malc here is my compromise. Malc Yo, fuck you clown. You can compromise these nuts. Gimme some. [handshake] Lizzy Shit, these ain't troubling times for us. People always gonna want what we got to sell. Hell, they going to want even more product when they lose their jobs and ain't got nothin' else. Johnny Okay, I guess all we gotta worry about is the cops taking us down then? Malc True that, cat. Hey yo, E, let him know what it is. Lizzy You gotta take some thieving, snitching motherfuckers, and show them I'm a bitch, but I ain't their fucking bitch, okay? They bribed a guard on the East Borough Bridge to let 'em through without checking their load, right? You guys is gonna go down there and tear 'em apart. Entiende? Malc There it is... DeSean A'ight. Lizzy Now get the fuck out of here. Malc We out. DeSean A'ight, we out. Malc Okay ma, peace. Andreas What you waitin' for, the bus? Lizzy Andreas! Malc Watch your mouth, son. Andreas Fuck you. [Johnny, Malc, and the other bikers leave.] Lizzy Make yourself useful and clean this shit up! Andreas Okay, okay, but you know what, I'm gonna need some rubber gloves. I'm gonna be honest, okay... <begin drive> Johnny I think we better take a cage on this run. Can you get your people to bring our bikes to the drop-off? Malc Aight now, try not to do too much damage with this here, a'ight? DeSean Lead the way, Johnny. <driving - going to the East Borough Bridge> Malc What was all that shit with you dissing me in front of Elizabeta, man? Johnny I thought you could handle it. Malc I can handle it, motherfucker. She's just one cold female, and I don't want her thinking I'm a bitch. Johnny Then I guess you got to prove yourself. No pressure, man. Malc Go fuck yourself, Johnny. <driving - going to the East Borough Bridge - continued - A> Malc This is one serious gun, amigo. This what they call a street sweeper? Johnny That's about accurate for this shit. It'll carve through any motherfuckers dumb enough to stand down wind of us. Malc No doubt. Johnny I'm guessing Liz wants this convoy iht like a fucking freight train if this is the firepower she's dishing out. Malc Should be interesting. <driving - going to the East Borough Bridge - continued - B> Johnny It's good to roll with you, Malc. Not that we know each other too well. But you can't be a bigger mope than the last two fuckups Liz Torres had me partying with. Malc Calm down. Johnny Uh huh. This fool called Playboy X and some off-the-boat European. No surprise, the deal went to shit. <cutscene - at the toll booths on the bridge> Man Honey, you're doing so great. I'm going to take care of this, we're going to get through this. LCPD You've got to be kidding me. What's the problem? Man It's okay, you just breathe. LCPD You're holding traffic up. What's the problem? Man Hey, we're kind of in a rush here, okay? Honey, it's okay, just breathe. LCPD Listen to me, man, you gotta get outta the way. You're holding up traffic. What's the problem here? Man Remember the classes, okay? Would you just let us through? LCPD Look, you don't go exact change, you're not going through. Those are the rules. I don't make 'em, but I stick to 'em. So just turn around and head on back to Dukes for me, will ya? Man Are you kidding me? Look, I will come back with all the exact change that you need. Alright? Just let us through, please? LCPD You gonna pay my bills and put food on the table? Turn around now... Johnny Hey look, I got some change right here. [Johnny elbows the officer in the face and Malc knocks him out from behind.] LCPD Aaargh, ahh! Malc A'ight, this one's on us. Now move your ass. Man Thanks guys. You're doing great, honey. It's okay, just come with me. Malc A'ight now, let's do this. <They ambush the convoy at the toll booths and steal the van, then lose the cops.> Malc Take us to the Point, Johnny. We got a lockup there. <driving - heading to the lockup> Johnny So, Malcolm, I got a question for you. Malc Sure thing, Jonathan. Shoot. Johnny Well, Malcolm, it's your crew. The Uptown Riders. Are you a-a motorcycle club like us and the Angels of Death? Malc I don't know. I mean, we ride bikes and we ride them hard. But the thing is, we don't wear fancy dresses or do pinky finger shakes or anything like that. So I ain't sure what that makes us. Johnny We're adults here, Malcolm. Malc Allegedly, Johnny boy. Allegedly. Johnny So let's not let this descend into an argument about the merits of good American machinery versus foreign plastic fantastic crap. Malc Or why you guys look like rejects from a bondage club. Johnny Or why you guys dress like the Republican Space Rangers. Malc Ouch. Johnny Anyway, what I'm asking is, what's the deal with this music you put out and the branded clothing and shit? Malc It's just part of our vibe, man. Roll with it. Johnny The vibe? Malc Yeah, man. The vibe. It's how we do. You know we a complete subculture. Like you guys used to be, back in about, what, '63 or something? Completely fucking lost, if you ask me. Johnny We've still got heart, man. The Lost MC are still here. We just don't get on MeTV and scream about it. Malc Yeah, sure you are. Whatever you say, Johnny boy. <reach the lockup> Malc Whoo! Well now, that's fine little nest egg to get us through a low point in these here global markets, baby. Johnny Sure, Malc. I'm just hoping you, me, and Liz can stay outta jail long enough to enjoy it. Later on. <phonecall to Elizabeta> Lizzy Johnny, did you get rid of that stupid bike of yours and drive my van for me? Johnny Yeah, I did, and it handled like a piece of shit. I dumped it in the lockup you mentioned, if you're interested. Lizzy Not in the van, baby. But maybe I'm itnerested in what's in the back of it. I'll send Andreas to check it out. See you soon. <text message from Elizabeta - later on> A friend of mine asked me to pass on the number of her boyfriend's cab business. It's called Bellic Enterprises and it's 555-2222. - Liz ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MARTA FULL OF GRACE (#et2) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - at Elizabeta's apartment> Lizzy [to phone, waving gun around] No, uh, speak up, I can't hear what you're saying. Johnny [enters] Easy. Lizzy Oh, it's you. One second. [to phone] No, all you gotta do is walk through customs and you home free... Esta bien. Yeah. I'll see you soon... Don't worry about my friend Johnny. He's uh- he's ugly, but he don't bite. [hangs up] Andreas! Andreas! Andreas [enters] Okay... okay... Lizzy Why do I pay you to protect me when you don't do nothing? Andreas I was in the kitchen. I was doing the thing you told me... Lizzy I don't want no fucking excuses. Get the fuck back in the kitchen. Andreas Okay, okay. [exits] Lizzy Jesus! Hey, Johnny boy. Johnny What's up? Lizzy You had a good time the other day with those boys, huh? Men and their motorcycles. Johnny Sure. Why'd we need to hit that convoy so hard? You know all those bodies can't be good for your business. Lizzy You don't think I could survive out here if I wasn't dropping some people? I'm the big boss. Johnny Okay. Lizzy People gonna love you, but they gonna hate you even more, right? Johnny Now you're starting to sound like Billy. Lizzy They gonna hate you because you a woman in this macho fuckin' world. They gonna hate you 'cause you from the Island. Stupid people think Latinas ain't worth shit in this town. When you the big boss, and you me, these bodies got to come with it. Johnny Okay. Lizzy I came up from a rough background. Man tried to turn me out when I was fourteen years old... I fed him his balls! Johnny I'm just saying you should limit your casualties. Lizzy When I ended that fucker, I got a reputation in PR. No man touched me after that. I ain't saying all men are bad, I wouldn't have married three of them if I thought that, right? [laughing] Johnny Alright, let's do this, Liz. Lizzy Okay, okay, go get my girl, Marta. She just came in on the Adios flight from PR. You think this place look okay? It's so hard to get it nice again once the assholes have their party. Johnny Yeah, it's fine. She'll love it. Lizzy Yeah? Okay... [Johnny leaves.] Lizzy Andreas! Andreas [returns] Si? Lizzy You fucking missed a spot! Andreas I missed a spot? No? Lizzy Come fluff these pillows and get that spot off my couch. <cutscene - at the airport terminal> [Marta is speaking rapid Spanish as she exits the terminal.] Guy What?... Huh?... Habla Ingles? Huh? Habla you're gonna suck American penis when you get into holding. Marta Liberty Swingers good team, eh? Guy Well... drug mule skanks ain't usually this cute. This is gonna be fun. Come on, baby. Johnny Hey, yo! Yo! I don't know about you, but the America I believe in doesn't deport hard working young girls like this one. Guy Yeah, well, the only thing this girl works hard at is swallowing bags of coke, and, in a minute, blowing me. So, sir, excuse me... Johnny Hey, hold on! Your name Marta? Marta Si! Si! Johnny [knees the guy] You're coming with me. C'mon, keep your head down! <Johnny fights off several cars full of police, then gets Marta and escapes.> Johnny Me, you go Liz Torres place. Yes? Okay? <driving - taking Marta to the apartment - A> Johnny You, Marta, first time in Liberty City? Marta [translated] Liberty City. Swingers Baseball. Statue of Happiness. Ugly women. Sleazy politicians. Gun crime. The most self-absorbed place on Earth. Yes, Liberty City. Johnny Liberty City. Very good. You learn good. I mean, you're learning very well. Marta [translated] You are not exactly who I expected, Mr. Johnny. So, now we are going to the five star hotel? Johnny Me no hablo mucho Spanish, lady. Marta [translated] I need a shower after this terrible welcome. Ughh. I'm nauseated. You have any idea how many condoms filled with cocaine I have in my small intestine? I hope nothing has ruptured. Johnny No speakey e Spanish, Marta. I'm sorry. <driving - taking Marta to the apartment - B> Johnny Johnny Klebitz. Nice to meet you. Marta Okay, Johnny. [translated] My name is Marta. Johnny Marta. Okay then. Not exactly the best welcome you could expect, but that's Liberty City for you. Full of surprises and most of them bad. Marta [translated] Are you talking about what happened to the guards? If you are smuggling tens of thousands of dollars worth of cocaine into a country, you cannot expect smiles and kisses. Johnny Uhh, yeah. Whatever, darling. You and Liz Torres old friends? You, Liz amigos? Marta [translated] Elizabeta and me? We met in Puerto Rico, on a very hot night. We fuck, yes, but it is nothing serious. Johnny Elizabeta, I only work for her now because things are weird with my brothers. Hombres. Lost MC. Marta [translated] Ah, I see. You pretend to be macho, but you like members of the same sex, as I do. How crazy. Johnny Loco, yeah. I get loco. Marta [translated] Sometimes I ask myself if it's all worth it. They could've shot me. And these condoms floating inside my belly could burst at any moment. Johnny Yeah, uh, maybe want to go out sometime? Let me show you around? Marta [translated] I take all the risks. And for what? A few measly hundred bucks, a trip to Liberty City, and another night or two with Elizabeta. At least she's good in bed. Johnny Maybe the language barrier might be an insurmountable hindrance in this relationship. <reach Elizabeta's apartment> Johnny Okay. Here we are. Marta [translated] This? Okay then. Thank you, Johnny. I will see you soon. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- SHIFTING WEIGHT (#et3) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <text message from Elizabeta> I got some work for you and Malc. Some see me. - Liz <phonecall to Elizabeta - optional> Johnny What's up, Liz? Lizzy I got work, Johnny. You should be grateful. While them other markets be dropping... Johnny Yeah, yeah, ours is going through the roof. See you soon. <cutscene - at Elizabeta's apartment> [Andreas argues with Marta as she stirs a pot on the stove.] Lizzy Andreas, you piece of shit, leave the girl alone! She knows how I like it. You don't need to tell her shit... leave my... [Johnny enters.] Lizzy Hey Johnny! Johnny Hey, what's happening? Lizzy Andreas... shut the fuck up! [He shuts up and Marta speaks Spanish to Johnny.] Johnny Huh? Marta Eat? Johnny Oh, yeah... Malc Nah, nah, nah. We gotta go. Shit's gotta get done. Johnny Alright, some other time then. Lizzy No, I don't think there's gonna be another time, man. Shit's closing in. All these snitches all over the place. You fucking hear that on your wiretap, Andreas? You fucking hear that? Maybe you guys should get rid of him and sell this coke later, huh? Johnny Do you want us to take Marta off your hands? Look after her until the heat's gone? Lizzy You ain't getting your hands on my baby girl. You only got to worry about yourself and selling that coke. You don't gotta worry about me, and you don't gotta worry about her neither. Okay? Johnny Okay. Come on, let's do this. Malc Yeah, we out. Johnny Adios amigos. Lizzy Andreas gonna be waiting for you. Andreas That's right. I'm gonna be waiting for you and you and anybody else who shows up, okay? 'Cause that's the way I roll. <begin drive> Malc We got to head up to Butterfly. This shit is going down up there. <driving - heading to courts deal off Butterfly - A> Malc How you like the feel of this, Johnny? Johnny I gotta say, I haven't seen Liz Torres that crazy before. DeSean Shit, I'd be good to go if I had some cooch like that. Johnny You think there's something going down with Liz and Marta? Shit. <driving - heading to the courts off Butterfly - B> DeSean Let's do this! Uptown Riders featuring The Lost in a Bohan joint, baby. Johnny What are you talking about, man? DeSean Don't fucking listen to me. I'm just making shit up as I go along, baby. Johnny Aren't we all? <cutscene - at the courts> Malc What up, kid. I got that package for you. [hands over the coke] DeSean Yeah, man, overnight express. Guy What? You been stepping on this shit? DeSean Fuck you. Test it and see. It's pure as punks like you gonna find. Guy Listen, you do your job... and let us do ours. DeSean Huh, whatever, man. Guy Go ahead, girl. [She snorts some up.] Guy That fucking good? Girl Yeah, it's good. Guy So what you going to do about it? Girl I'm going to take it for our own! [They aim guns at the bikers, the bikers aim back.] Malc I don't think so. Guy Well, you best change your mindset, 'cause this right here, man, is happening. Girl Yeah, motherfucker. [shoots Johnny's bike] Malc Oh, you fucked up now, bitch. [shoots the girl] Johnny Holy shit. Guy Yo, you see what you did? This shit's fucked up, man! [runs off] Johnny Fuck! God damn you motherfuckers! DeSean Gonna need that shit. [picks up the coke] Johnny My fucking bike, man! Malc C'mon, man, c'mon. Yo, c'mon, Johnny. <Police arrive on the scene. Johnny gets on the back of Malc's bike and guns them down to make an escape.> <cutscene - under Union Drive East in Presidents City> Johnny That was a wild ride, Malcolm. Thanks for makin' room on that pussy pad. Malc Ahhh, always space for you, Johnny boy. Maybe we should get us a room together at the Jefferson Motel? I heard you and your brothers liked that hardcore hard rock bonding shit. DeSean Quit these flirtations, B. Malc A'ight, a'ight. DeSean We gotta take this shit back to Liz. Malc Right, right. Catch you round, Johnny. You wanna kiss your daddy? Johnny Whoa there. Malc Peace out. Johnny See you boys later. <phonecall to Elizabeta> Lizzy Johnny. How'd it go? Do I hafve some bail money at least? Johnny Deal didn't happen. Buyer got smart. Pigs got involved. Our friends're heading back with the product. Lizzy Things couldn't get much worse here, you know. You know, these is tough times. You best stay away from me and Marta for a while. See you. Johnny Alright, baby. Just don't get freaked out if you see me rolling in a cop car. Weird times call for weird measures, Liz. <text message from Clay - later on> Johnny I heard your Hexer got messed up. call me and I'll get it fixed up and will bring it to you. <phonecall from an unknown caller - later on> Jones Mr. Klebitz. How're things? Johnny Fuck off, man. Jones You know, Johnny, you should have thought about being more forthcoming earlier in our relationship. As it happens, others in your fraternity are not as loyal as you. Johnny I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Jones You're about to see a close friend on the witness stand. Time's up, Johnny. Johnny I'll believe it when I see it, you tight-ass prick. Adios. <phonecall to Elizabeta - optional> Johnny Liz? You there? Lizzy Tiralo. Tira el perico. Oh shit. Flush that shit! Tira el perico! They coming, Johnny. They fucking coming right now, you know. Johnny Yeah, umm, good luck, Liz. Is Marta okay? Lizzy Ha ha ha. She's okay. Oh, we all good, baby. Ha ha ha. Bye bye. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ROMAN'S HOLIDAY (#ab2) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <text message from Ashley> Baby. I need to see you. Get here soon. xx <phonecall to Ashley - optional> Ashley Johnny. You coming here or what, sugar? Johnny What you need, Ash? Ashley I can't really talk. Just come over to my place, okay. Hurry, baby. <cutscene - at Ashley's place> Ashley You're here. You're here. Oh man, Johnny! Johnny What's the matter, sugar? Ashley Oh, Johnny, I fucked up. I fucked up real bad. Johnny What'd you do? Ashley I messed up, baby. Promise you won't be mad? Johnny Why, what'd you do? Ashley I'm an addict. I need help. Johnny What the fuck did you do? Russian You must be Johnny. Johnny Who are you? Russian My name is not important. Johnny What is this? Russian Your woman here owes Dimitri Rascalov a lot of money. Johnny Okay. Russian We need you to do us favor. Johnny What? Russian We need you to kidnap someone for us. Johnny Well, I'm not in the kidnapping business, dude. Russian And I'm not in the dude business, dude. You either do it, or junkie gets killed. Not difficult decision, even for a man stuck in 1960s time warp. It's easy. You grab him and deliver him to warehouse off Lompoc in Bohan Industrial. Johnny And this'll pay off her debts? Russian Well... it pays off interest. Johnny Wonderful. Russian The name of the man we want is Roman Bellic. Johnny Yeah. Russian He runs a cab business, but hangs around some backroom gambling place on Dillon Street in Schottler. Johnny I got it. Russian You find him, you take him... Now, run along. Johnny Ashley, you gotta stop fucking things up... Fuck! <phonecall to Malc> Johnny Dude, you busy? I got something and I don't need it getting round the clubhouse. I'll owe you, brother. Malc What you need, Johnny? Johnny I need to snatch some guy, name of- uhh, Roman Bellic. Runs a cab firm, in debt to some Russians. You down? I'll pay. Malc Uhh, a'ight. I'm up on Y in Northwood. See you in a minute. <cutscene - on Y in Northwood> Johnny Nice rice rocket you got there. It come with a fortune cookie? Malc As a matter of fact it did. Told me I was gonna meet some 1950s lookin' motherfucker who preferred rusty oil dripping junk to hi-tech precision machinery. Johnny Rusty oil dripping American junk. Malc Bitch, please... Your patriotism is making you ignorant. Anyway, we gonna go grab somebody. We need four wheels, I got that. Johnny Alright, man, but I'm driving the cage. Malc Now, you sure you know how? Johnny Watch and learn, my friend. Watch and fuckin' learn. <driving - heading to the gambling den - A> Malc So, we got a plan, Johnny boy? Johnny Of course we've got a plan. We snatch this guy, deliver him to some other gys, then we pat ourselves on the back for doing a great job. Malc Sounds simple as shit. Johnny If you want a Wingit Presentation before every job you do, you're running with the wrong crowd. Malc Who is this guy? Why you want him snatched? Johnny I dunno. I'm doin' this as a favor for a friend. Malc Huh. Must be a good friend. Johnny It's complicated. Malc Oh, it's like that, is it now? She like your girlfriend or something? Nah, nah, that's cool. I'm feeling that. Things is coming together. Starting to make sense now. Johnny She ain't my old lady, alright? Malc Sure, sure she ain't. That's why you running all over town trying to snatch a fool up, huh? Please. Johnny She's a friend and she's in trouble. I believe in looking out for people you've been close to. You and your boys might ride, but you don't know nothing about brotherhood. Malc Shit. I know about brothers, but I know about bitches as well. And this here job - smells like a bitch to me. It got bitch-stink all over it, son. Johnny Thank God I'm hanging out with another two-bit street philosopher. Malc She playing you? She in trouble? Johnny I don't know. Both maybe. Fuck it. Shut up for a second. You know, Malc, I think you've got unresolved women issues. Were you close to your mother growing up? Did she let you down? Malc We ain't kidnapping nobody because of my momma, Johnny. It's your lady- friend getting us to do this. Think on that, son. <driving - heading to the gambling den - B> Malc Roman Bellic? What the fuck kind of name is that? Johnny I don't know, Greek? Malc Sounds like it's Eastern European or some shit. Johnny Greek's in the east of Europe. Malc Yeah, that's what I said. Maybe Italian or Rome or some shit. Johnny All the immigrants you meet seem to be from Russia. What happened to the days when it was guys coming across from Mexico? Malc Or in your case, guys coming from a 1950s time warp. Johnny That's good, Malc. Real good. Malc Why are all you bikers racist, just like the Angels of Death? Johnny The Lost aren't like those Deadbeats. Take a look at my brothers, man. We're more like equal opportunity haters - we hate assholes and fools, wherever they're from. Malc Oh, wait. You hate me because of where I'm from? Man, that's cold. I knew you were a fucking racist. I fucking knew it. Stop the car. Johnny Malc, man, come on. Malc Yo, lighten up, Johnny boy. I'm just fucking with you, son. Johnny So, yeah, this guy we're snatching isn't the only European-type dude I've come across recently. Malc Is that a fact? Johnny Worked with this other guy, he could handle himself. Maybe this guy will be the same. Malc Most Europeans are gay, man. That's why they wear them tight-ass jeans. Johnny Is that a fact? I'll bare that in mind, Malc. <phonecall to 555-2222 - optional> Roman Hello, this is Bellic and Bellic Enterprises? What can I assist you with? Johnny Is Roman Bellic there? Roman Umm... I-... Mr. Bellic is very busy man. An important and busy man. I think he's on a hot date or something. What is it you need from him? Johnny We got two college co-eds over here and, they're in need of a limo, and I'm told this Bellic guy's the man for that kind of work. Roman Well, in that case I'll-... I mean, ah... We'll try to contact Mr. Bellic and have him come as soon as possible. <cutscene - Roman parks up near Johnny and Malc> Roman Ladies, ladies, ladies! You have got yourselves the best limo driver in the whole of Liberty City. I'll take you through the bright lights of Star Junction, past the glamorous shops of Middle Park West, and, if you're lucky, you might end the tour with a look at the finest specimen of manhood in the entire metropolitan area. [Johnny and Malc approach with guns.] Roman Wait, where are the ladies? Who are you? Malc Get in the car, fat man. Your ass has just been snatched. Johnny Don't try nothing, chubby. It ain't like you're a difficult target to hit. Roman Help me! <cutscene - at the gambling den - if you go there instead of calling> Johnny That's got to be him. Come on. Roman Hello. Malc Hey, yo man. How you doin'? Roman Please, gentlemen. The men in there just took my money. I can't get robbed twice in one day. What do you want, the shirt of my back? Come on. Johnny We're not robbing you, we're taking you. Your chips've been cashed, chubby. [They drag him back to the car.] Roman No! Wait! Johnny Get in there and shut up! Roman Somebody! Stop! Somebody! Help! Malc Shut your fat ass up. <begin drive> Johnny We gotta take the fat man to a warehouse in Bohan. <driving - taking Roman to the warehouse - A> Johnny All you Europeans got the same fuckin' accent. Roman Please, please. I'll pay you anything. Johnny I think he's trying to say something, Malc. Roman I can get money, I promise. Malc I don't know, I ain't hearing shit. Roman Okay, okay. My cousin, he has money. He will pay you. Malc Oh, I get it. I think the man's trying to give us some money. We let him go and he'll come back with a bag full of unmarked twenties, right? Roman Yes, yes. Exactly, exactly. Johnny You mean, he's like, trying to bribe us? Roman Yes. Johnny I hope he knows that you and me are men of integrity, Malc, and that we'd find something like that real insulting. Malc Did you mean to insult us, Mr. Roman Bellic? I sure hope not. Roman Help! Help! Help me! Help me! Johnny Malc, tell this gentleman what my kind of people who try to buy their way out. Malc Just so you know who you dealing with, Mr. Bellic, this is one screwed up dumb redneck motherfucker. Roman Oh Lord. Please help me! Malc Hey now, listen. I do mean motherfucker in the most literal sense. Serious incest motherfucker. Fucking you up the ass with a barbed wire dick would be a pleasure for this man. Roman Lord, I am sorry for all the women I have chased, the money I have wasted, the internet porn. Malc Yeah, this biker dude is twisted as all hell, man. By the way, how many guys you killed, son? Johnny You mean, like, this year, or in my whole career? Malc A'ight, just this year, man. We ain't got time for all that shit. Johnny It's been a good year, you know? Roman Oh Lord, I apologize for sleeping with those twins. Johnny You should apologize for that smell. You shat yourself or something? Malc God damn. Roman Lord, I am sorry for shitting myself, and for laughing at Brucie's balls. <driving - taking Roman to the warehouse - B> Johnny You know, this ain't the first grungy European I've met recently. Roman Ahhhh, help me! Someone! I'm too young to die! Please! Johnny Shut the fuck up, you fat prick. Malc Yeah, shut the fuck up, ya heard? Roman Jesus, help me! Somebody help me! Malc Shit, J. Can you pop this motherfucker and shut him up? Roman Oh no, please! Johnny Can't you see I'm trying to drive here? You fucking pop him. Roman Help! Help! Help! Help! Malc Man, I just got me this nine. I don't wanna go puttin' no bodies on it already. But shit, I like this gun. Roman Why? Why? Johnny I'll buy a new one. Just shut this dude up. Roman I'll be quiet. I promise. Malc I told you, I like this gun. I ain't gettin' no bodies on it. Not today. And not this Rusty Brown's munching, quadruple Bleeder Burger eating motherfucker. Roman Help me! Help me! Johnny Just pop the fucker. And you can get the bullets outta him afterwards and no one's gonna trace that shit back to you. Roman No, no! Please! Malc Hell no, I don't wanna get my hands all dirty and shit. Get gravy all over my new manicured fingers. Johnny Man, can you smell that? Malc Dammit, dude done pissed his self. That shit ain't right. Johnny From the smell, it ain't just piss. I'm glad I ain't sitting back there with him. Malc Damn, you better not be right. What's wrong with you, man? We was only joshing you. Tell him, Johnny. Roman Huh? Johnny We're just meant to kidnap you. If you were meant to be going in the ground, you wouldn't be conversing with us gentlemen like this. Pull yourself together, man. <cutscene - at the warehouse> Johnny Somebody looking for a fat Slav with a bladder problem? Russian So... this is Roman Bellic? Not such a tough guy, eh? What is all this fuss about his cousin? Johnny Listen, buddy. Ashley is square with you now. So do me a favor, go easy on the fat man. I've seen some of the bodies you people drop in the Humboldt. Malc Easy, Johnny. You saw the shit stains in the back seat. He's scared enough. Russian What happens to this shithead is none of your concern. You, come with me. [walking off with Roman] Malc Shit, Johnny. Yo, I gotta bounce. Be easy, man. <phonecall to Ashley> Ashley Baby? Johnny Those Russians have got their guy. And you got lucky, but you got to control yourself, Ashley. The ice got you into this mess. Ashley I know I am, Johnny. And you know what's the best thing about me? You. Call me, okay? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- DIAMONDS IN THE ROUGH (#rbo1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <phonecall from Ashley> Johnny Ashley? What is it this time? Ashley Hey, Johnny boy. It's nothing. I mean, it's something, but, but it ain't like you think. I need you to meet a friend of mine - Ray Boccino. Johnny That guinea? Jesus, what you doing with him? Ashley We're not doing nothing, Johnny. Nothing we ain't supposed to. I need you to meet him is all. We're over at Drusilla's in Little Italy. Can't wait to see you, baby. <cutscene - at Drusilla's diner> Johnny What's up, baby? Ashley Nothing. Ray's a friend. He's... Johnny Ray's a friend? What are you talking about? Ashley Yeah, he's a friend. You know, he's a friend like you, baby. I mean, not like you, but- but, you know, we ain't- we ain't doing nothing. I mean, not at the moment, but- but he's a friend, and he's been- he's been real good to me, and we need you- we need you to do this for us, alright? I ain't sleeping with him. But, you know, you and me broke up. You was with that Leila girl. Johnny That's all over now, baby. You know that. Man, you gotta get off them drugs. Ashley I know. I will. I need you to do this for me. Johnny Let me talk to Ray first. Where is he? Ashley In there somewhere. Johnny Right. [He heads inside.] Ray Hey, Johnny. Johnny Hey. Ray Am I glad to see you, huh? Johnny Ashley says you want something. Ray Ashley, uhh, good kid. Y'know, man, that ice. In my day, it was coke and downers. That was it. I even missed the Ecstasy. That shit fucks people up. Johnny Yup. Ray Listen, I've got a little business proposition for you. Johnny Oh yeah? Ray Okay, I know about some diamonds. Illegal. Never in the system. Easy to move. No insurance. Couple o' millions worth. Bought by wise guys, from wise guys, for wise guys. You understand? No tax man, nothing. Got our names all over them. Johnny Right. Ray Problem! I can't be seen near them. Alright, let's just call it a conflict of interests. Johnny Well, I imagine that happens quite often with you, Ray. Ray Oh yeah? You don't like me too much, do you? Johnny Does anyone like you too much? Ray I tell you what... You go do this job, go get yourself some real money, you can buy yourself some real friends? Johnny Yeah. I should do that. Ray The ice is being held by a guy named Gay Tony. You're gonna need a little help on this. Johnny Should be no problem with that. Ray Good. And stay in touch. Johnny! Don't get too clever. <phonecall to Jim> Jim Jonathan. What can I do for you? Johnny Brother James. We got a hook up in Broker. Might need some help. Jim Alright, man. I'll let The Lost brotherhood over there know you're comin'. They like getting as dirty as the rest of us. Johnny Appreciated, man. <driving - leading some of The Lost from Broker to the docks in East Hook - A> Johnny Alright, boys. All I know is that these diamonds are being held by a man about town called Tony Prince, and we're to take 'em. There should be a good profit in it for The Lost MC if this comes through, so let's fuckin' do it, yeah? Who knows, maybe down the line, there'll be an opportunity to rip off the smug guido who gave us the job in the first place. Come on! Brothers for life, Lost forever. <driving - leading some of The Lost from Broker to the docks in East Hook - B> Johnny Okay, my brothers. We're ripping off some guy with mob connections down by the docks. If these rocks are like I'm told they are, The Lost MC is gonna do real well outta this deal. Might even be able to extra some more money from the smug goomba bastard who gave us the job in the first place. Let's fuckin' do this thing. Hell yeah! Brothers for life, Lost forever. <cutscene - at the Platypus in East Hook> Cook [holding out the diamonds] Hey guys, how ya doin'? Err, so umm... Tony These are great, they're great. But uh... Two million? You had your head in the oven? Cook Mr. Tony, I have what I tell you. Perfect clarity. Beautiful clarity, well cut and a shit load of carats. What did you expect? Evan Tony, they're gorgeous. Tony Just like you. [The bikers sneak toward the deal from behind some crates.] Luis Come on, can we do the hand over please and get out of here? This is too much. Evan Ignore him, he's probably been up all night with some bimbo. Luis Tony! Tony You're a chef? Cook Well, cook, yeah. Tony We have a line in some kitchen supplies, how about I throw that into the equation? What's the price? Luis Look, this the money we agreed upon, less ten percent. Just give us the ice. Cook Alright, alright! Evan Hey, Tony, can I hold them? [takes them] Thank you. Cook [receives money from Luis] Thanks. Luis [spots the bikers] Oh shit, Tony, we outta here! [Tony and Luis run back to the limo. Evan splits right with the diamonds. The bikers begin firing.] Luis Come on, let's go. Evan, get them to the club! And don't fuck about, okay? <Johnny chases down Evan's limo, kills him, and takes the diamonds.> <phonecall to Ray> Johnny I got you that ice. You want me to bring it back to the restaurant? Ray I know you don't like me, Johnny, but you don't have to get clipped. Jesus, probably got half the wiseguys on the East Coast following you right now. I need you to split the haul up. Leave half in a trash can on Hematite Street and the other half in the trash on Emerald. Some of my boys are gonna go pick it up, all subtle like. Johnny Sounds real dumb to me, but if that's what you want done, I'll do it. As long as I get paid. <phonecall to Ashley - after stashing the diamonds> Ashley What's going on, baby? Johnny I ditched the ice. It's in the trash now. Ray better hope a garbage truck doesn't come around anytime soon. Ray got any money for me? Ashley There ain't no money yet. Ray's got to sell this stuff before you get your cut. He'll be in touch, sweets. I love you, Johnny. Johnny Not enough, you don't. <phonecall to Angus - optional> Angus Johnny? What's this I hear about you getting caught up with the mafia? Johnny Yeah, well, Ash... She introduced me to this guy. Angus That the same Ash you ain't seeing no more? The Ashley Butler who's too tweaked to know what's good for her? Johnny That Ashley, sure. I just want her to be okay so I ain't leaving her to die, you know. Angus Man oh man. What women can do to us. Don't get in over your head, Johnny. That mobster is cold as all hell. Look after yourself, man. Johnny Always. You too, man, you too. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- COLLECTOR'S ITEM (#rbo2) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <phonecall from Ray> Johnny Raymundo. Ray John John. Ashley sends her love, yeah. You've got to give her another chance, you know. You kids are perfect for each other. Johnny Thanks for the advice, Ray. I was thinking the same thing about you and a coffin. You got that diamond money? Ray You're gonna have to work for it, friend. Hope you don't mind sweating a little. Handover's happening at the Libertonian. Just make sure my man Nicky walks away with half the money. <cutscene - at the south entrance to the Libertonian Museum> Johnny Hey, alright man. How's it goin'? Niko Hey, good to see you again. Johnny Yeah likewise... Uh, let's hope this goes a little better than before, yeah? Come on, let's get inside. <cutscene - on the second floor of the museum> Isaac Gentlemen, gentlemen, pardon the precautions. You know how things are. Niko No problem. Johnny Let's do this. Isaac Okay, let's see the stuff, gentlemen. Mori, come over here. Johnny Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Since we're having a little show and tell, let's see some money. Isaac Of course, no problem. [Isaac sets down and opens a suitcase.] Isaac There it is. Beautiful, huh? Unmarked bills! No history, no need to launder. Johnny Good. Niko - show him the stuff. [Niko holds out the diamonds.] Isaac Get in there Mori. [Mori steps forward to inspect them.] Mori Isaac - look at them. Isaac Gorgeous, huh? Like condensed money. Mori Isaac - these are great. [Luis appears at the window, guns down Mori.] Luis Rest of you motherfuckers wanna die - do something stupid okay! Mofo Fuck you! [aims shotgun up] [Luis shoots the mofo and everyone scatters.] Johnny Just get the shit man. C'mon! <Johnny fights his way out of the museum and chases down Ray's men as they try to escape.> <phonecall to Jim> Jim Brother Johnny. Johnny James. Where are you, man? I need to give you something. Jim Exeter on V. What's up? Johnny Wait there. <cutscene - in an alley off Exeter> Jim Hey. Whaddya got? Johnny I got all the money that diamonds can buy. Jim You mean all Ray's money? Johnny Fuck Ray, man. Fuck all of 'em here. [handing over the bag] Jim Yeah. Fuck 'em. I guess we're rich then. Johnny Hold on to it, brother. Jim You can bet your balls on it. <phonecall to Ray> Ray Okay, Johnny. Nicky tells me you got away with the money. Bring it to me. Johnny Niko said that? Dude, that's weird. Shit was kicking off. I don't know what happened to the money. I just wanted to get out with my life. Ray You better not be pulling nothing, Johnny. Or I'll start pulling your fucking teeth, you hear me? Johnny I like you, Ray. Still keep your humor in the midst of an almighty fuck-up. See you around. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WAS IT WORTH IT? (#rbo3) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <text message from Jim> Meet me at Ray's. <cutscene - at Drusilla's diner> Ray Well, look who it is. Hey. How you doin', tough guy? Johnny What's your problem? Ray I told you not to get too fuckin' clever. Johnny What? [Ray aims a gun at Johnny.] Johnny Aww, you gotta be kidding. Ray Start walking... downstairs. Johnny Okay, I'm going. Ray That's right. [They head down to the basement, where a man is burning Jim with a blowtorch.] Ray Gentlemen. Johnny What the fuck is going on here? Jim Fucking hell! Stop that shit, asshole. Ray Anything yet? Man Nah. Ray Burn him again. Where's my fucking stuff? You see, genius over here would rather get creme-bruleed before he dies. Hopefully you ain't so stupid. Where's my stuff? Johnny I don't know what you're talking about. Ray Fuck you. [whips Johnny with the pistol] What are you, fucking deaf? Where's my fucking stuff? Johnny I don't know. Ray Who do you think you're bullshitting? Johnny A bull shitter. [laughing with Jim] Ray That's funny. [whips Johnny again] Johnny You're gonna have to cut that shit out, Ray. It's not fucking cool. Ray I fucked Ashley, my friend, and now I'm going to fuck you. Where's my fucking stuff? Johnny Fuck off, Ray! Ray [to the man] Go ahead. [Jim cuts his hands loose, gets behind the man with the knife to his throat.] Jim Drop the fucking gun, goon. Ray No. Jim I'll cut him. Ray No. [Johnny kicks the gun out of Ray's hands, and Jim picks it up.] Jim Back the fuck up, back up. Ray Go ahead, go ahead! Go ahead, run like a couple of girls. Billy was right about both of yous. Back-stabbing fools. Go ahead, I got guys on every corner. Where are you gonna go? [Jim slits the man's throat and runs up the stairs with Johnny.] Ray Aghh! I'll see you later! Johnny I gotta go talk to Ashley. Jim I'm gonna go get the fucking brothers. <phonecall from Ashley> Johnny Hot damn, baby girl. Your friend Ray ain't so friendly. Ashley Johnny K, you're alright. I'm sorry, sweets. I think Ray sent some guys after you. Johnny Of course he has, baby. Thanks for the heads up. Meet me outside the house, okay? I'll be there if I'm still walking. Ashley I'll wait, baby. <Johnny disposes of the hitmen and goes to Ashley.> <cutscene - at The Lost MC> Johnny What's going on? Ashley I'm sorry. Johnny For which bit? Ashley For everything. He told me everything. Me and Ray ain't friends no more. Johnny Me and Ray neither, sugar. Ashley Johnny, I got some bad news. Jim... He ain't... Johnny Oh no. Oh, man. Not Jim... Fuck this. Angus is crippled, Billy gone insane, now Jim's dead. I guess that's what they call payback. Ashley You got me. Johnny I don't got you. Crystal gone and got you, babe. Ashley Johnny, I'm gonna quit. Johnny Yeah, and I'm an idiot believing in your bullshit all this time. Ashley It ain't your fault. Johnny It's my fault I'm a fucking moron. Ashley I'm going to go to rehab, straighten myself out. Anyhow, he- he told me you wouldn't get hurt... I wouldn't have done it otherwise. Johnny Yeah, well why shouldn't I kill you? Ashley Why bother? I'd be better off dead. But Johnny, Ray ain't the problem. Johnny What are you talking about? Are you telling me that a backstabbing mob guy who wants to kill me ain't the problem? Ashley It's Billy. See, it's Billy. Ray... It turns out that Billy was trying to poison him against you, and now apparently Billy's going states... He's gonna- he's gonna blame you. I'm sorry. Johnny Well, what now? Ashley You gotta get someone to help you. Maybe that Congressman? Johnny Maybe. We'll see. Go on and get out of here. Ashley I love you, Johnny K. Johnny You're speaking a foreign language to me now, lady. Now get the fuck out of here. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- GET LOST (#ts3) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <phonecall from Stubbs> Johnny I'm not in the mood to do any killing for the supposed elite today. You're gonna have to get your own hands dirty, Stubbs. Stubbs Oh, spare me the lectures. This is important, Jonathan. Important enough for me to come down from my ivory tower and rub elbows with you blue collar types on the wrong side of the West River. Meet me at your Clubhouse. I drink single malt. <cutscene - at The Lost MC> Stubbs Nice place you've got here, Johnny. Not quite sure I meet the dress code, but I think I like the smoking policy. Johnny What the fuck do you want? Stubbs Now, is that any way to treat a friend? Johnny Are we friends? Stubbs I think so. You've certainly seen me naked. You want a cigar? Johnny Do you wanna go fuck yourself? Stubbs Whoa, not particularly. But listen, your friend, Ray - don't worry about him. Johnny Why not? Stubbs Apparently he and a lot of his associates are under some serious observation and in the process of imploding. They'll either be dead or inside within a month or so. Best thing you can do - stay away from him. Johnny What about Billy Grey? Stubbs Yes. Well, you've got a bit of a problem there, sport. He's been talking inside. Thinks he can help pin a major drug dealing ring on you and your buddy in the chair. Thinks he's going into the Witness Protection Program, and if he collars you, you'll do fifteen years and he'll live in a condo in Arizona. Johnny Well, I don't doubt that, Mr. Stubbs, but he's on the inside. Stubbs I know. Johnny And there's currently very large walls and armed guards between me and him. Stubbs Yeah, well, you're a smart guy. You'll figure something out. If you get into trouble, you call me when you get tehre. I might have something to help you with it. Johnny Good, I'll need it. Hey, one more thing Stubbs... Why you doing this? Stubbs I told you I was good for a favor. <phonecall to Terry> Johnny Terry. Man, we got to pay our friend Billy a visit. He's been talking. Bring Clay, bring all the fucking firepower you got, and meet me at the Alderney State Correctional. I'm waiting. <Johnny, Terry, and Clay destroy the prison's front gate and kill countless guards and police forces getting inside. While Terry and Clay get the bikes, Johnny confronts Billy in front of the chapel.> Johnny Well here you are, you fork-tongued bastard. I've been looking for you. Billy Hey Johnny, what are you in for? I'm not gonna ask how you got in here, brother. Jonathan Klebitz, my brother. Johnny the jew. Come on, man. You here to kick a brother while he's down? Johnny, man, what the fuck? <execution> Billy Check mate, dude. Come on, get it over with. Do it! Johnny I'm doing it! Billy What? You waiting for a speech or something? Come on! [Billy rushes Johnny with a knife, Johnny shoots him in the chest.] <driving - leading The Lost back to the Clubhouse - Johnny monologue - A> Johnny Billy may have helped to build our club, but he sure as shit ripped it apart. I'll forgive him the insults and injuries, but I can't forgive him for that. Treacherous fucking bastard. He went insane. <driving - leading The Lost back to the Clubhouse - Johnny monologue - B> Johnny Terry, Clay, thanks for rolling with me. This gang is fucked all to hell right now, but I'll love you brothers until I die. Man, I miss Jim. He was one princely son of a bitch. The best thing this gang ever had. <driving - leading The Lost back to the Clubhouse - Johnny monologue - C> Johnny That shit needed to be done. Billy needed to be shut up. Funny thing is, five years ago he woulda lead the charge into Alderney State himself. Drugs sent that fuck insane. <driving - leading The Lost back to the Clubhouse - Johnny dialogue - D> Johnny What the fuck is left of our chapter, boys? Dead bodies, burnt out brothers, and a clubhouse like a mausoleum. Fuck if I want it standing. It stands for bullshit, nothing more. <cutscene - at The Lost MC> [The Clubhouse sits in ruins.] Angus Johnny. Johnny Hey. Terry Hey. Angus We had fun here. Johnny Yeah, we did. But it's over. Terry Yeah it is. How the fuck did that happen? Angus You know how it happens. It's that fucked up part of people which means good is never good enough. I mean it wasn't enough that we had to be drug dealers, we also had to be outlaws, to be maniacs, to be psychos, and to be greedy. Terry That combination of greed and fucked up stupidity, that works well. If you're in the government. Not so good if you're a fuckin' crook. Johnny Ain't that the truth. Go ahead... Let's put this place out of its misery. Angus Yeah, do what you gotta do. Johnny Come on, man. Let's get out of here. [Johnny drives Angus down the front staircase, Terry starts the house on fire.] <phonecall to Stubbs - optional> Stubbs Johnny? Johnny Congressman. Stubbs I see your problems have been resolved. Is it back to normal at The Lost Motorcycle Club? Johnny No, it ain't, Stubbs. You see, we got a set of codes that mean you can't keep on like nothing's happened after brothers turn on brothers and your world turns to shit. Stubbs My, my. A man of principles. Impressive, Klebitz. You must find Liberty City an awful place to live. Such a shame your values are more suited to medieval times. Johnny Yeah, well, I'd prefer to stand up for something then to chop and change and stab a friend in the back to get ahead. That's why I didn't become a politician. So long, sport. <phonecall to Ashley - optional> Ashley Didn't think I'd hear from you again. Johnny Didn't think I'd call you. You hear about Billy? Ashley Yeah, I heard. Look, Johnny. Look, have you got any money? I need forty bucks. I need it real bad, baby. Johnny Not this time. You can kill yourself on your own. Goodbye, Ash. <phonecall to Angus - optional> Johnny Angus, man. Angus Chapter President. Johnny I'm president of a burnt out house and some broken ass brothers. It's dead, man, it's over. Angus What are you gonna do? Johnny I dunno. I'll probably keep sending money to Jim's old lady and her kid. I owe him that. Angus We all do. Johnny Beyond that, I'll probably try to cut my ties. Angus What about Ashley? Johnny Ashley? The ice got her good. I finally cut her loose in my head, man. I don't know what's left for her other than that need to fuck up everything around her. You've been a good friend, Angus. Angus You're a good man, Johnny. Things should have worked out better for ya. Johnny Well, things should be better for a whole heap of people. It don't work out that way, do it? Adios, amigo. <email> email@example.com Clean Hey baby, I checked into rehab again last week. I feel rough, but this time it's going to stick, I know it. Yours, Ashley. <email - positive reply> Good luck Ashley. Please stay the fuck away from me. <email - negative reply> I don't care, Ash. Stay away from me. Please. <email> firstname.lastname@example.org Shit Johnny boy, I fucked up. it weren't my fault. I got thrown out of the facility. it weren't my coke. I love you, Johnny. I love you. drugs ain't shit. you're my drug. Listen, Johnny, can I borrow some money, for a few days? I miss you. I miss you so much. Your friend, Ash <email - positive reply> Good luck Ashley. Please don't contact me again. <email - negative reply> Fuck off! <email> angus@LostMC.com Brother, Well I guess that's that then. You did what had to be done. And that's why you're a brother and why it's time to move on with our lives. End the charade that this gang meant anything. Do it for Jim. Ride safe, Angus <email - positive reply> World ain't what we thought it was, and people we trusted turned out to be scum. I miss Jim. More than anything. He was the real deal. The man we all wanted to be. <email - negative reply> Fuck. We'll see, man. We'll see. =============================================================================== RANDOM CHARACTER ENCOUNTERS (#rndchar) =============================================================================== ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MALC 1 (#malc1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - on a street corner in Northwood> [Malc is working on his bike.] Malc Hey yo, Johnny, give me a hand, man? Johnny Why, man, what's up? That hot import givin' you trouble? Malc Come on, man, I'm not in the mood for fuckin' jokes. Johnny Hey, take it east. I don't mean nothing by it. Malc My bust, man. I'm kind of stressed. My boy DeSean ain't showed and we're supposed to roll together. I think he's up in his girl's crib or something. Johnny Well, I can see how that could be annoying. I forgive you for your earlier aggressive manner. Malc I really fuckin' appreciate that, but what the fuck am I going to do now? I can't do this for self. Johnny Okay, I got it. I'll help a friend in need. Question is, you gonna be able to get that thing started? Malc Watch me. [starting it up] There she is. That's my girl. C'mon, man, she don't like to wait. <begin drive> Malc Follow me, man. <driving - following Malc - A> Malc How about that? You and me just bumpin' into one another like that. Johnny Yeah, man. That's Liberty City for you. Malc For a big fat city, it's a real small place. [to phone] DeSean?... Shit man, I thought you was with Big D. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, we on our way. [hangs up] Motherfuckers shot DeSean. You down to help me or what? Johnny I'm down. Let's go. You think DeSean's okay, man? Malc DeSean's a'ight. Probably only got hit with a nine. The fool's on the phone, right? Johnny You ever been shot at in one of those races, Malcolm? Malc Man, shit. I'm too far in front of these bitches to get shot. <driving - following Malc - B> Johnny What we doin' on this run anyway? Malc We gotta go somebody about something, a'ight? Johnny Thanks for enlightening me. Malc [to phone] Yo, what?... Them rat bastards shot you? Shit, yo, don't worry. Me and Johnny's on the way. [hangs up] DeSean's been shot. We gotta help him. Can you follow me? Johnny Let's do it. Malc I guess we got a change of plans. Johnny Plans tend to change when someone gets shot. Malc I sure hope D's learnt how to hold his tongue. Last time he got hit, he couldn't shut the fuck up. Johnny Shit, Malc. You're real sympathetic to your friend. Malc The game is the fucking game, Johnny. You know that. <reach DeSean> Malc Shit, D. You don't look so bad. DeSean Yeah, they just grazed me. It's the principle, you know? They only meant to be using baseball bats in the race. I wasn't expecting no lead sligning. Johnny How about we hit 'em right back, man? DeSean Sounds good, Johnny. <begin drive> Malc I'm gonna lead you to 'em. <driving - following DeSean - A> Johnny So, I was wondering. What did they, like, ah, shoot you with? DeSean It was more like they shot at me. Them shotguns can't do nothing at a range. Only got a few pellets in my arm. Johnny Yeah, man. You really got to get up close and personal to make the most of them things. <driving - following DeSean - B> Johnny You ever turn a gun on someone in a race, man? DeSean I look like I need help? You don't need to shoot a guy who got a bat two feet up his ass. Johnny No, no, I guess you don't. Nice image, by the way. You just put me off corn dogs for life. <reach the other bikers> DeSean That's them cheatin' punks. Yo, we gonna teach 'em something. <They gun down the cheating bikers.> DeSean Yeah, we just hit one out the park for fair play. Malc For sure, for sure. Johnny Well, gentlemen, I might excuse myself. See you soon, yeah? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MALC 2 (#malc2) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - in a parking lot in Northwood> Malc What up, Johnny boy? Johnny Hey, Malc. Malc It's all good. How'd them problems you were having work out? Johnny About the same as your bike. Malc What? You need to be easy, funny man. Johnny Lighten up. Malc Ah, man, shit. You think you got monster nuts. You know what? Pull 'em out, roll with me right now. Johnny Oh yeah? Malc No doubt. There's some serious cats on the other side of town looking for a race. And this ain't no pussy ass polite race, either. We gonna be scrappin' all the way. So what's up? You in? Johnny Yeah, I'm in. But you won't be if this hot import breaks down before we get there. Malc Man, shit. <begin drive> Malc See if you can keep up with an Uptown Rider. <at the starting line - A> Malc Take this shit, yo. Smash a mother fucker good if you have to. [hands Johnny a bat] Remember not to shoot nobody. But you ain't gotta be all friendly up in this bitch. <at the starting line - B> Malc Pretend like you're in the Liberty City Swingers, man. Knock 'em the fuck out. Remember guns ain't appropriate here, Johnny. Keep that shit to yourself. <Johnny wins the race.> Malc A'ight, a'ight. Everybody get lucky once in a while. Johnny I was lucky to be born in the U-S-of-A, dude. I was lucky to be born after the invention of penicillin and the internal combustion engine. But that there race was pure skill. So long, buddy. Malc Peace out. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- DAVE (#dg1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - outside the lawyers' firm in The Exchange> Johnny Who are you? Dave Dave. Dave Grossman. I'm a friend of Billy's. We met at the Clubhouse. Johnny Friend of Billy's, huh? Well good luck with that. Dave Well, hey, I haven't seen him for a long time. But, hey, hold on, man, I need a favor. Johnny What? What am I, the mid-life crisis association? Dave Oh, look, I'm desperate, man. Take my watch, take my Fleeca. Take anything, man. I'm- I'm fu- fucking desperate! I'm dying here. Johnny Why's that? Dave I'm being blackmailed by my secretary. She's saying I touched her and I didn't do anything. She'll ruin my life, and I didn't do anything. Johnny That's unlucky, man. Dave Look, it would break my daughter's heart. She's saying that I looked at her tits, and because I did that, I suppressed her. She's a fucking moron. But my wife is not a kind woman. She'll get one whiff of this and she'll rip my life to shreds. I'm a lawyer and I'm getting ass-raped by the law. Can you imagine what that feels like? Johnny Mercifully not. Dave Look, all I need from you is to intimidate her lawyer. Just make him get her to back down, man. Johnny So you want me to go put the fear of the Lord in a lawyer? And you're going to pay me for it? Shit, Dave, why didn't you say so in the first place? Dave Ah, solid, man. <Johnny chases the lawyer and intimidates him.> Lawyer You better have a good lawyer, pal. Johnny Yeah? Well, in my books, the only good lawyer is a dead one. Lawyer Uhh... okay? Johnny Put the brakes on your case against Dave Grossman or you'll be one good fucking lawyer, dude. Lawyer Okay, I know when I'm beat, okay. Chill out, will you? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- BRIAN (#bj1) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <cutscene - on a sidewalk in Acter> Brian Johnny! Johnny K. Johnny Hey, I thought I told you to stay out of town? Brian I did. I left. I was a ghost. Seriously, Johnny. Johnny You were a ghost for like, five minutes, man. I told you to go permanently. Brian Come on, man. Don't be like that. We were all under a lot of pressure. And listen, I made some bad deicisions. But seriously, Johnny, you're the man. Johnny Uh, you were my brother, Brian, but you fucked shit up. Brian Come on, man. That ain't fair. That ain't fair. Johnny Really? But all the people that were killed, and all the shit we've been through, and the fact you and Billy are rats. That was fair? Just part of the game? Fuck you, Brian. Brian Man, it wasn't like that. Seriously. Billy, he fucked up. But me... I was just being a good soldier. Following my leader. Johnny Yeah, killing your friends. Brian Everything got out of control, seriously. You're my family. Johnny Get the fuck out of my sight. Brian You gotta come with me. I got to show you something. Billy, he controlled me. I'm so ashamed. I gotta come clean. Come with me, please... Johnny Fuck you, Brian. Brian I can help you save the club, man. Seriously. Then I'll leave town. Johnny Okay... but if you're fucking with me, I'm gonna put a bullet right through your fucking skull, Brian. <begin drive> Brian See if you can keep up, huh Johnny? Don't get lost. <driving - following Brian - A> Brian [to phone] Hey, hey, you'd never guess who I bumped into... Johnny Klebitz... Yeah. We're coming to you. [hang up] I've been waiting to see you for a long time, Johnny. Ever since- ever since you paid me that little visit. Johnny That's nice, dude. I'm real touched. Brian Yeah. Nice one, Johnny K. <driving - following Brian - B> Brian [to phone] Brother... Brother, brother, brother, brother, it's, uh, it's uh, Brian... Yeah. I got Johnny K from Alderney with me. We're coming to you. [hang up] Johnny What you been doing with yourself, then, Brian? Hiding under some rock? Brian "Hiding under some rock?" That's funny, JK, real funny. Yeah, I've been, you know, hanging out with some dudes. I miss Billy, you know. Johnny You sound kinda creepy, there, Brian. No, I don't mean to make fun. I really don't. <Brian stops in a parking lot where a dozen of his allies step out of cover to attack Johnny.> Brian Heh heh heh. You didn't expect this one, did you? Fuck you, Klebitz-o- witz. <Johnny kills Brian and his faction.> =============================================================================== CONTACT INFO (#contact) =============================================================================== If you have a question, a suggestion, a correction, whatever, feel free to contact me. Add "GTA", "GameFAQs", or something relevant in the subject line, Also, specify whether or not you want to be included in the credits and by what name. Email: InfernoDS@gmail.com GFAQs: InfernoDragon PSN: InfernoSD =============================================================================== CREDITS (#credits) =============================================================================== Thanks to the following... For developing this great game, Rockstar North. For producing it, Rockstar Games. For help identifying characters and various background infos, Grand Theft Wiki. =============================================================================== VERSION HISTORY (#version) =============================================================================== 0.00 4/29/10 Started the script. 1.00 5/17/10 All storyline missions complete, all random character encounters complete. =============================================================================== LEGAL (#legal) =============================================================================== This document is Copyright 2010 InfernoSD. Although the dialogue contained in this document belongs to Rockstar Games, I typed it out. This document may not be reproduced under any circumstances except for personal, private use. It may not be placed on any web site or otherwise distributed publicly without my permission. 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